Forwarded by the ASC-VSO 
Posted: Mon, 1 Mar 2004 22:53:28 -0600  
In: alt.startrek.creative 
From: "PineTrees"  
 

Title:  Seven Habits of Highly Effective Vulcans
Author:  Mr. PineTrees
Rating:  R for language
Summary:  If Stephen Covey wrote self-help for Vulcans...
This is a special guest author appearance by *Mister* PineTrees.  His first
post!

-PineTrees


Seven Habits of Highly Effective Vulcans

1.      Chicks dig aloofness.



2.      Never say "Impact in ten seconds."  Even if accurate, it gives the
impression of imprecision.  Pause very briefly, and say, "Impact in nine
point seven three one seconds," instead.



3.      If you cross your fingers when you say it, "Live long and prosper,"
really means "Die soon, dirt poor."



4.      Cool defined in four words:  raised eyebrow - blue eyeshadow



5.      Effective Vulcans choose their friends wisely.  If, for example,
your best friend is somewhat intellectually challenged, he makes you appear
even smarter by comparison.



6.       Never fuck with blind crazy chicks.



7.      Play it safe:  always invite your weak, easy-to-kick-their-ass
friends to your Pon Farr.


--
Stephen Ratliff
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