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Date: Tue, 22 Jun 2004 08:20:50 -0400
Subject: [ASCEM-S] NEW DS9 Professor Quark and the Quick Study 1/1 (O/Qu) [NC-17]
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Title: Professor Quark and the Quick  Study
Author: Bethos
Contact: Bethdrgyn@aol.com
Series: DS9
Rating:  NC-17
Part: 1/1
Disclaimer: Star Trek's not mine - it belongs to Paramount  and Viacom and
its creators. Quark and Odo aren't mine either - I just sort of,  um, borrowed
them for awhile.
Codes: O/Qu
Summary: Quark does his bit to  help Odo win Kira. Set during "Crossfire".

"Look, Odo, I said I'd do  you a favor," Quark said heatedly. "I said I'd
help you out. But you have to  cooperate."

Odo looked at him, hesitantly. He stood there in his Bajoran  security
officer's uniform, bewildered, and if Quark didn't know any better 
he'd  say the
changeling was frightened. As if there was anything to be scared 
of.  "Cooperate
... how?" Odo said, helplessly. The single strand of hair that had  escaped
from the smoothed-back 'do was really getting on Quark's nerves. 
Odo'd  actually
gone out in public like that? All the way down from his own quarters to
Quark's? And he *still* hadn't fixed it?

"Don't just stand there!" Quark  said, glowering up at him. "Form a clitoris!"

Odo stared back at him,  shocked. "What?"

Quark sat down on the edge of his bed and buried his  face in his hands.
"Odo," he groaned between his fingers, "this isn't  *working*."

"I'm trying," Odo growled back.

"No you're not," Quark  retorted, "you aren't even doing anything."

"You said you would teach  me," Odo snapped. "Now, I'm an excellent student,
but not when my teacher  doesn't actually offer me any actual information." He
stalked toward the door.  "If you're not going to help me, I don't see any
reason to continue this ...  farce any longer."

Quark knew an opportunity when he saw it, and  presently, this one was about
to exit through his front door. He got off the bed  and crossed the room to
catch Odo by the wrist. "Wait, wait, *wait*," he said.

Odo turned and looked at him, his expression disgruntled.

Quark  tried to organize his thoughts.

"Well?" Odo drawled. "I'm  *waiting*."

"All right," Quark said. "You are anatomically male.  Yeah?"

"As much as I am anatomically anything."

"And the major is  as anatomically female as any anatomical female I ever
saw," Quark said, not  quite able to keep the leer out of his voice.

Odo scowled at him. Which  was to say that the scowl deepened; Odo was always
scowling. "Quark  ..."

"Which means," Quark continued blithely, "that the best way for you  to
seduce the major is to first develop a working knowledge of female anatomy.
Correct?"

"I don't want to seduce Major Kira," Odo said.

Quark  blinked at him. "What?"

"I want her to ..." Odo trailed off, apparently  having difficulty saying the
words.

"The best way to make a woman love  you," pontificated Quark, rendering Odo
the beneficiary of his considerable  expertise, "is by pleasuring her."

Odo hesitated. Then he said, "All  right."

"So," Quark said brightly, "you have to form a clitoris, so that  I can show
you what to *do* with one when you get that far."

"When I get  that far," Odo said. "When I get that far? When?" Odo turned and
started heading  for the door again, just when Quark had almost got him back
to the bed. "This is  a mistake."

"It's not a mistake!" Quark said. "But maybe I'm getting  ahead of myself. I
know you've never ... coupled. But ... what have you  done?"

"Done?" Odo stared at him, clearly incredibly  confused.

Quark was beginning to think he might be dealing with a  hopeless cause.
"Done! You know ... done?"

"I don't know what you're  talking about," Odo growled.

"Odo, have you never even *kissed* a  woman?" Quark demanded, exasperated.

"No."

"Never," Quark  repeated.

Odo glared at him. "Why would I have done that?"

"Wh ...  why?" It was as if Odo was suddenly speaking a different  language.

"Kissing is an ..." Odo started to say, but Quark cut him  off.

"That can't be right, you have to *know*," Quark said. "Here, let me  show
you." After all, it wouldn't be any good selling seduction to Odo if 
Odo  didn't
even know the meaning of the word. This was business, and Quark always  went
exactly as far as he needed to, in business.

He grabbed Odo by the  wrist and pulled the bewildered changeling in close,
part of his brain  pretending that it was someone else - one of the Dabo 
girls,
Natima Lang, hell,  Jadzia Dax - but there really wasn't any way it could be
any of those, not with  how unyielding the body he was pulling into his
embrace. Odo was beyond tense -  his whole body was as stiff as a board. He 
was
plainly terrified. "Relax," Quark  said. "I'm not going to *bite* you." He
grinned. "That's another  lesson."

Odo, who had started to relax, started to tense up again. He  opened his
mouth to say, "Quark ..." in a warning tone, but didn't get further  than the
"Qua" before Quark captured his mouth with his own and kissed his 
old  adversary.
And since Odo's mouth was conveniently open, Quark slid his tongue  through
the opening and began probing, tasting, trying to provoke some kind 
of  reaction
from a man who, let's face it, was about as cold a cold fish as cold  fish
got.

He tilted his head back to release his mouth, not letting go  of Odo - no
matter how much the guy clearly wanted to run away - and said, "You  have to
*participate*, Odo."

"How?" Odo demanded.

"You're - ..."  Quark stopped. "Learn by doing. Just ... stick your tongue in
my  mouth."

"Why?"

"It's supposed to be pleasurable."

"For her  or for me?" Odo hesitated. "I don't want to just -"

Quark snorted. "For  both of you, you big ... no. Sex is an experience to be
shared, it's not just  for one or the other of you ..." Well, with exceptions,
but Odo was in no way  ready to hear about it. He wondered if he could come
up with away to apply an  exploration of a Bajoran woman's erogenous zones to
oo-mox. He didn't think so.  "Just try it, okay?" The possibilities of Odo's
shape-shifting capabilities  offered all kinds of erotic possibilities to
Quark's overactive imagination, a  speculation that he had never even 
thought to
explore for an instant.  Situationally, though ...

Odo brought his mouth carefully to Quark's,  delicately as though he were
terrified of breaking - something - and pressed  their lips together. Quark
opened his mouth a little and waited for Odo to make  the first move; it 
took time,
and when he finally did so he was extremely  tentative at first, his tongue
gentle and delicate as it explored Quark's mouth.  When he pulled back, Quark
had to stand there quietly for a second to organize  his thoughts again.

"Well?" Odo said.

Quark found his voice. "That  was ... very impressive. For a beginner, I
mean. Hey - you don't generate  saliva, do you?"

"No. Humanoid tongues are moist, so is mine. But I can't  leave my moisture
behind. It's part of me. I take it with me." Odo frowned. "Is  that ... bad?"

"No!" Quark said hurriedly. "No, it's, uh, good. It's very  good. But I think
you should try to be a little more  forceful."

"Forceful?" Odo blinked at him.

"You seem a little ...  scared."

"I've never done this before!" Odo retorted,  annoyed.

"No, I mean ..." Quark shook his head, suddenly very aware of  the fact that
he and Odo were still holding each other. He let go, and Odo  quickly did the
same. "You just come off as scared because you're so hesitant.  With your
tongue. You're not going to break me with it. Uh, or Major  Kira."

"I'll try again," Odo said. This time he pulled Quark into his  arms and
kissed him, forced Quark's mouth open with his tongue, and plundered  his 
mouth
with it.

Quark pulled himself away, gasping. "Odo," he said,  wiping his mouth despite
the fact that Odo, true to his word, hadn't left any  moisture there. "Kira
and I both need to breathe!"

"Oh." Odo looked  embarrassed. "Right."

"But uh, you're definitely on the right track."  Quark wondered if there was
a way this could possibly get more awkward. Oh!  There was an idea. "Well, I
guess I'd better take off my  clothes."

"What?" Odo stared at him.

Quark sighed. "I have to show  you the next step, Odo. The next step requires
an absence of my pajamas." He  started undoing the fastenings on his pajamas,
feeling spectacularly unaroused.  Then he thought about that last kiss, and
the possibilities of consciously  regulated mouth temperature on certain other
parts of the anatomy, and felt  himself getting back into the mood.

"Should I ...?" Odo  asked.

Quark nodded. "Best to see what we have to work with here," he  said.
"Although I guess you can have anything to work with you want," he added
thoughtfully.

Quark had been expecting a physical body beneath Odo's  uniform as generic
and unfinished-looking as his facial features were; he was  surprised to find
that although it was pretty blandly humanoid, Odo hadn't  overlooked the
creation of things that Quark wouldn't have expected him to  remember, like 
nipples.
And pubic hair. He looked, as a matter of fact, the way  an average naked
Bajoran man would look.

"How come you can do that, but  you can't make a face?" Quark asked.

Odo shrugged. "It's my face," he  said diffidently.

Quark slid the rest of the way out of his pajamas,  feeling strangely
self-conscious in the face of Odo's manufactured nudity. It  wasn't that 
Quark was
ashamed of his naked body; in fact, some days he thought  about advertising by
leading his dabo girls on a naked parade around the  Promenade, but he was
usually slightly drunk when these thoughts occurred and  yet still sensible 
enough
to realize that Odo wouldn't let him get away with any  such stunt. It was
just that in front of a man who could look like whatever he  damn well 
pleased,
it was unsettling displaying his own natural  assets.

"The one thing that really makes this difficult is that, well,  the major is
... a woman," Quark admitted, before continuing hurriedly, "but  when you can
learn to please one lover, you can learn to please another. It's  all a matter
of finding the, uh, erogenous zones." He looked up at Odo. "Do you  *have*
erogenous zones?"

"I don't know," Odo said.

"Any part of  your body that is particularly sensitive to touch?" Quark
pressed.

Odo  looked annoyed. "Quark, my entire *body* is particularly sensitive to
touch."

Quark contemplated that in brief silence: the idea of one's  entire body
being a gigantic erogenous zone.

"What is that, what are you  doing?" Odo demanded, pointing at Quark's rising
penis.

Quark stared at  him for a second. He put his hands on his hips. "Don't
panic, Odo. It's an  *erection*. Doing ... it's not *voluntary*, it just 
sort of -
you've never had  one! It's never happened to you!"

"Of course it hasn't, my body movements  are always entirely under my
complete control," Odo responded testily, glaring  down at him. "Why are 
you looking
at me like that?"

"Just - you -" Quark  shook his head. "Never mind. Just never mind, Odo. All
right, when a solid male  such as myself or, for example, the men that Major
Kira is accustomed to  coupling with ..."

"Like Shakaar," Odo growled.

"Or Bareil, yes,"  Quark said, nodding. "Um ... men get erections. It's when
you're, uh, sexually  aroused, and the blood rushes to your penis, and it
gets, um, lift. And  hardens."

He reached down with one hand and started to encourage Little  Quark to
assist in the demonstration. With the other hand, he started massaging  his 
own
ear. Oo-moxing yourself was never as good as getting someone else to do  it 
for
you, but it was a good way to get things rolling.

"So your ears  are your erogenous zones," Odo said, "but I have no way of
knowing what Major  Kira's are."

It felt somehow incongruous to be discussing Kira's  erogenous zones *while*
using her title, but Quark let it lie. "Yeah," he said.  "Not 'til you get a
chance to find out for yourself." He grinned. "But one of  the things you do,
when ... initiating intimacy, is explore your partner's body.  You find the
right places and you find out what to do with them."

"How do  you know?" Odo asked helplessly.

"Well, obviously you experiment," Quark  said. "Like, if I were Major Kira
..."

Odo snorted his  derision.

"All right, if I were me having sex with you," Quark said,  rolling his eyes.
"And I wanted to find out where your most sensitive parts are,  I'd start -
by kissing you, which is an old favorite, generally well-received  ..." He
caught Odo by the upper arm and pulled him in for another kiss, a bit  more
playfully this time. The changeling seemed confused but willing enough, 
and  even
got into the tongueplay once he figured out what Quark was trying to do.  Good
enough for a beginner. He *was* an extremely fast learner, and it was 
nice  not
having your novice partner's spittle all over your chin after the initial
experimentation ...

"And then," Quark said, kissing Odo's neck, "I'd  start heading downwards ...
like this." He slid one of his hands slowly down  Odo's back towards his ass,
exploring the territory - very smooth, which wasn't  all that surprising,
although not completely without variation; it seemed that  Odo had molded his
body pretty damn well. There were even traces of body hair to  the texture, 
which
Quark hadn't been expecting; it didn't seem like Odo, with  his sleek
pulled-back hair, would think to put any elsewhere on his body. There  was 
even some
thicker brush under his arms, although not *too* much; it seemed  that the
security chief was as fastidious about his body as he was about 
the  Promenade,
which Quark found kind of funny. He also took the opportunity to  reach up 
with
his other hand and tweak the escaped strand of hair into something  akin to
its proper place, because it really had been driving him  nuts.

"Uh, what do I do with my hands?" Odo asked plaintively.

"What do you *want* to do with your hands?" Quark returned, smirking a
little. Then he rolled his eyes at Odo's obvious confusion and fear. "Just 
...  do
what you think I'd *like* you to do with them. Explore me. Explore my body.
Kira's not going to *tell* you what she wants, unless she's an 
extraordinarily
unusual female, and so I'm not going to just *tell* you either."

"That's  cheating," Quark added as Odo's hands went to his lobes. "You
already know about  tha -- aa -- ahaaaa!"

Odo's touch started out firm, but as he got more  certain about what he was
doing, his flesh went partially but not entirely  liquid, still gently
massaging Quark's ears but in a way that was completely  contoured to their 
shape in a
way that no humanoid's fingers could ever  conceivably do.

"Good?" Odo asked, as if Quark's panting and eye-rolling  weren't
encouragement enough.

"Good, yes, good," Quark gasped, as the  warm pressure continued. "Can you -
do that - aaahhh - anywhere?"

"I  suppose I could," Odo said. "It's not difficult."

"Not difficult!" Quark  hooted. "Ohhh. Odo, if you can find the right place
to do *that* to Kira ...  stop, stop, stop."

Odo released his ears. "Stop?" he asked, reforming his  hands into something
more recognizably humanoid.

"Yeah," Quark gasped,  nodding. "I don't think ... well." He took a deep
breath, let it out. He was  still as hard as a rock. "If there's one thing 
a woman
appreciates, it's a man  who knows how to use his tongue. Lemme show you.
Give me an erection, will  you?"

Odo examined Quark's penis in a moment that felt really surreal.  Soon
afterwards he had a respectable erection of his own. "Like  that?"

"Yeah." Quark knelt in front of him, gripped him by the hips, and  said,
"Now, I'm not an expert at this, but I've had it done to me often 
enough  ..." And
he started giving Odo a blow job, figuring that although Kira didn't  have a
penis, he did, and he wanted to see that it was as well taken care of as  his
ears ... and Quark was sure Kira would appreciate a lover who understood  what
oral sex was, in any event.

Eventually Quark released Odo's penis  and got up, wiping his mouth. "You
see?"

"You want me to do that to you?"  Odo said.

"It's not exactly the same for a woman of course," Quark  admitted, since
that was painfully obvious. "But the principle's aren't that  different. I 
mean,
in a lot of ways a clitoris is just a really small  penis."

Odo hesitated. Then he said, "All right." He imitated Quark's  previous
stance - on his knees, his hands on Quark's hips for balance, which  Quark
suspected that Odo didn't expect he'd need.

Fellatio from a  shapeshifter was all that he could possibly have imagined
and more; Odo's mouth  could do just about anything, he didn't need to 
breathe,
and he could, to an  extent, regulate his own body temperature at will. The
strangest sensation was  that of moisture, because despite feeling that Odo's
tongue sliding up and down  his shaft was damp, he could also tell that there
wasn't any getting left  *behind*. Given spoken directions - or rather, moaned
directions - Odo was an  incredible erotic adventure. If he could find a
holosuite programmer to  duplicate this, he'd make more latinum than 
whoever had
first sold Vulcan Love  Slave.

When Quark couldn't hold it in any longer, hot semen spurted into  Odo's
mouth. Odo wrenched back, startled, and spat it out, all over the  floor.

"Sorry," Quark panted. "Should've given you some - warning  ..."

Odo looked down at the floor. "Uh ..."

"Don't worry about  it," Quark said, letting himself slide onto the bed on
his stomach, on top of  his comforter. "I'll get it later. For now I've got
something else I want you to  do."

Odo looked worried. "What?"

"I want you to do me, Odo." Quark  grinned over his shoulder at the
changeling's confusion. "Sex."

Odo  looked confused. "What did we just do?"

"I think the technical term is  fellatio," Quark said after a moment. It
wasn't something that he ordinarily had  to call up from memory. "It's oral 
sex.
There's more."

"More," Odo  repeated.

"Penetration," Quark explained. Part of him felt extremely  ridiculous. The
rest was just surreal. He pushed himself up to his hands and  knees. "Here, I
don't have a vagina like Kira, but this'll do for an  approximation," he
coaxed. "Just take your penis - uh. I guess I won't need  lube, if you can 
be really
slick?"

"You want me to ..." Odo looked down  at his erection, and then pointed at
Quark's buttocks. "There?"

"Yeah,"  Quark said, nodding.

"Humanoids do this?" Odo asked.

"Of course,"  Quark said, puzzled by Odo's confusion. "All the time. It's ...
you know.  Intimacy. Sharing. Sex. Of course, you probably won't do exactly
the same with  Major Kira - unless she wants you to -" Far be it from Quark to
speculate on  whether or not Kira liked to take it in the ass. Actually, he
might speculate on  it, but Odo was the last he'd tell. "But the idea - of
entering, of penetrating,  of getting *inside* your partner, that's the same."

Odo was silent as he  considered this. "This is as close as solids can come
to the Link," he  said.

Quark had no idea. "Uh ... probably," he said.

Odo nodded.  Then he slid one hand over Quark's buttocks and then into the
crack between  them.

Quark twitched at the contact. He hadn't been expecting Odo to do  it. For
most of this Quark had had to initiate everything; Odo taking the  initiative
confused him slightly.

"Slick," he said, tensing and relaxing  his buttocks as the changeling felt
around in there. "Remember to be slick." It  was an unusual feeling, as though
Odo were testing to find where the best place  to put his cock would be.

Quark was no virgin or anything - most Ferengi  businessmen weren't; there
was always that one boss that you had while you were  a reasonably young male
who felt the need to broke you in, especially when you,  like Quark, had
perfected that "innocent cherub" look for their benefit ... and  Quark 
lived his life
by the Rules of Acquisition, even at a young age, so he'd  done what was
expected of him. And over the years, commerce had led him to 
the  realization that
when you were willing to have sex with aliens and were  attracted to the idea
of doing so, having sex with *males* was *easy* ... and  the willingness to
do so could only help his popularity and never hindered it.

Quark opened his mouth to say something else, but completely forgot what  it
had been going to be when Odo's penis - hard and hot and, yes, slick - thrust
into him. He gasped at the suddenness of it. Odo didn't seem to know what to
do  next; Quark arched onto him, trying to encourage him to pump. "You - have
- to -  move," Quark said, as he writhed, impaled, on Odo's shaft.

Then, an  unsettling sensation: Odo's penis was moving without the rest of
him, exploring  like it had a mind of its own. Quark squeaked as the 
changeling
found his  prostate, and Odo apparently took this for encouragement, because
he focused his  attentions on it and started massaging it with his penis,
similarly to the  oo-mox he had performed earlier. It was weird, because no 
one had
ever managed  to oo-mox any part of Quark that was not his ears before, but
also the strongest  sensation of sexual pleasure that he could remember 
feeling
offhand. For a  second Quark thought that he was going to die of carnal
gratification, and  wouldn't that be fun story to tell the Blessed 
Exchequer when
he arrived ... and  then he exploded all over his comforter, helpless against
Odo's onslaught, and  then utterly drained - and certainly not thinking 
clearly
- he flopped forward  onto the bed, into his own mess.

"Oh my," he said, his voice muffled by  his pillow. There weren't enough
words, in any language, to describe what had  just happened.

Odo slid out of him. The relatively cool air of his  quarters felt strange
and fresh against his skin. He let out a hissing breath.  "Uh ... I *don't*
think there's much more I can teach you, Odo. That was ..." He  stopped. "I'd
better take a shower."

"And ... that ... could use  cleaning, too," Odo said gruffly. He had
reformed his uniform.

"Yeah,"  Quark said. It felt like too much effort to move. But laying
sprawled in a  puddle of his own semen didn't seem like a particularly 
grand way of
spending  the rest of the night, either. "Uhh ... let me know how it turns 
out."

"I  ... will," Odo said. He was already at the door, looking extremely
thoughtful.  "Er ... Quark?"

Quark grinned. "Don't thank *me*, Odo. You did it all  yourself. I'm just the
..." He waved his hand vaguely. "Practice dummy. Go out  there and win your
true love."

Odo left.

Quark eventually got  himself to get out of bed. He bundled up his comforter
and took it to the  replicator in his wall. It wasn't like it wasn't
replaceable. Then he trundled  into the bathroom and started the sonic 
shower. Before
he got in, he glanced at  his reflection in the mirror.

"Give you three to one odds he chickens  out before he even gets to her
door," he said to it.

Finis.





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