Path: newsspool2.news.atl.earthlink.net!stamper.news.atl.earthlink.net!elnk-atl-nf1!newsfeed.earthlink.net!atl-c03.usenetserver.com!news.usenetserver.com!newsread.com!newsstand.newsread.com!POSTED.monger.newsread.com!not-for-mail Newsgroups: alt.startrek.creative.erotica.moderated Approved: ascem@earthlink.net Organization: Better Living Thru TrekSmut Sender: ascem@earthlink.net Message-ID: <20041122133831.97852.qmail@web41903.mail.yahoo.com> From: Marcia Wilson-Cales MIME-Version: 1.0 Mailing-List: list ASCEML@yahoogroups.com; contact ASCEML-owner@yahoogroups.com Subject: "Corpses Are Not Considerate" Part 3 Content-Type: text/plain Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable Lines: 432 Date: Mon, 22 Nov 2004 15:55:02 GMT NNTP-Posting-Host: 209.198.142.218 X-Complaints-To: Abuse Role , We Care X-Trace: monger.newsread.com 1101138902 209.198.142.218 (Mon, 22 Nov 2004 10:55:02 EST) NNTP-Posting-Date: Mon, 22 Nov 2004 10:55:02 EST Xref: news.earthlink.net alt.startrek.creative.erotica.moderated:85766 X-Received-Date: Mon, 22 Nov 2004 07:55:59 PST (newsspool2.news.atl.earthlink.net) "Holy God!" =20 Scott was distracted enough out of his own horror at the sound of the CMO's= . The potential for panic was unmistakable as his invocation hovered in th= e air of Shuttlelounge B. =20 "Where'd it go??" McCoy gaped. =20 "All I know is, *I* dinnae move it!" =20 "Well *I* didn't move it!" McCoy barked. "And if you didn't move it, and = I didn't move it--who moved it?" =20 "A verra careless technician?" Scott offered. =20 McCoy lapsed into low-key swearing. "We've got to find that thing! Chekov= will be here in the morning to oversee the--" He stopped, verbally and ph= ysically. "Oh." He said. softly. =20 Scott knew not to feel good at that. "What is it?" =20 "Barrows told me the captain was sending Chekov down to oversee the Outgoin= g Security Mails." =20 "So? Thot's over in th' next storage!" Scott pointed to the general direc= tion. =20 "So, while overseein' em is just electronically scanning the cargo, how muc= h to do want to bet our Eager-beaver Navigator wanted to get ahead of his w= ork and started checking out the Incoming stocks in B-Lounge?" He stared h= opelessly at the bigger man. =20 Scott closed his eyes. Chekov was an eager-beaver. A paranoid one, to be = sure, but always anxious to produce a 200% markup on the work input-output = equation. =20 "So he's got it." Scott corrected himself. "Nae; he'd na be sae foolish. = He's gut it hidden somewhere." =20 "We've got to find it." McCoy's eyes scanned the five hundred and twelve p= ressed fiber canisters in the B-deck. "Oh, Lord. The captain might come t= o see me tonight when I return to shift; I need to have some kind of answer= s for him!" =20 "Ye'r not the only one." Scott had found his mechanical tricorder; he pass= ed it over to McCoy. "Mebbe ye'd know how to set this for a Vulcan skeleto= n?" =20 *** =20 Kirk drummed his fingertips on the arms of his chair. Bridge was fairly qu= iet at this point of the annual calendar; unlike the anniversary of Caligul= a's Assassination, the twice-yearly occasion of annual Solid Mail was a pea= ceful occasion, and out of courtesy, co-workers made the attempt to get alo= ng. If they didn't, they soon found the captain was harsh with holiday tra= nsgressors. =20 "Kirk to Sickbay." =20 "Sickbay," Dr. M'Benga's soft deep voice floated easily over the intercomm= . "Dr. M'Benga speaking." =20 "M'Benga, where's McCoy?" =20 "He's on his lunch break, sir." =20 "His lunch break? Officers' Mess broke half an hour ago." =20 "He only eats when the crew eats, sir. Something about how jg's are too sc= ared to ask him for free medical advice." =20 Kirk blinked. He glanced at Spock, who had actually looked up from his pos= t. "I heard him say that once over the incident with Blalock...I didn't th= ink he was serious." He shook his head. "Dr. M'Benga, leave a message for= Dr. McCoy for when he returns: since he is unavailable at the time *I* am= , he can wait until tomorrow morning for my return of his call." =20 "Tomorrow morning, sir?" =20 "Yes. I'll answer his call after I see to Chekov's post with the mail." N= ow why, he wondered, did Chekov flinch like that? He frowned thoughtfully = at the younger man, wondering again if he had been wise to recruit a former= Covert Ops-soldier. The man knew his work, and could perform six complica= ted maneuvers at once...but there was something about him that was just...t= witchy. Not like Sulu--although Kirk frankly felt the Helmsman was one of = the most dangerous men on the Bridge. He sighed to himself, wondering if h= is day would remain boring, or be broken with some kind of unplanned chaos. =20 *** =20 Dr. M'Benga looked up from his desk several hours later; McCoy was returnin= g to Sickbay with Scott. Both men looked somewhat the worse for wear. Sco= tt had a forming black eye where something straight and rigid had scraped h= is face. McCoy was uncharacteristically rumpled, and shook his hand like h= is fingers hurt him. =20 "I still can't get over how much those things hurt." McCoy complained. =20 "Leastwise it wasnae our heads when it fell," Scott pointed out. "How long= will I keep this shiner?" =20 "Long as you want. I can even make up a story about it for the medical log= s." =20 "Ahem," M'Benga cleared his throat. "Leonard, have you been square dancing= in the Jefferies Tubes again?" =20 "Not recently, and never, ever alone." McCoy shot back. "Anything happen = while I was out?" =20 "Nothing much; the captain is going to answer your call tomorrow morning af= ter he briefs Chekov." =20 McCoy stopped. His hands fell limply to his sides. Scott closed his eyes = and clutched his head. =20 "I'm takin' off for the rest of the day, M'Benga," McCoy strangled. "If, = for no good reason, the captain calls, please route his call to me." =20 *** =20 "So then, when I mentioned the mail, I swear I saw Chekov flinch." Kirk pa= used to let the wine flow down his throat. "Just a little reaction, like a= reflex. The odd thing was, I got the distinct impression that Sulu was li= stening to my pointless conversation with both ears." =20 Spock paused slightly while pouring his own drink. "A figure of speech, ca= ptain?" =20 "Hmn? Oh. Yes." Kirk chuckled. "Anyway, Chekov gets jumpier by the day.= I'm wondering if he's taking those rumors seriously." =20 Spock's eyebrow slipped upward, openly puzzled now. "What rumors would tho= se be?" =20 "Oh, somebody started the rumor that I was looking for Chekov's replacement= --not that I am more than I'm looking for anyone's replacement. So long as= they do their work, I'm not going to kill anyone..." Kirk turned his head= as his communicator buzzed. "Hold on a moment..." He twisted, pulled out= the tool and snapped it open. "Yes?" =20 "Captain?" =20 "Yes, Bones, what is it?" =20 "Are you busy tonight?" =20 Kirk shook his head. "I did have plans, why?" =20 If possible, a distinct uncomfortable silence conveyed itself over the line= . "Well, I keep hitting a snag on my Interdepartmental Affairs." =20 (On the other side of the communicator, Scott was nodding approval at the m= ost plausible explanation they could come up with). =20 "What kind of snag, Bones? Is this what you've been trying to reach me ove= r?" =20 "Um, yeah." McCoy answered, clearly reluctant to go into details. "I'm co= nvinced its a clerical error, but I certainly don't have the security clear= ance to go in and scan, much less correct the mistakes." =20 Kirk sighed. The last thing he wanted to do was go down to help McCoy--not= that he didn't mind being in the man's company, but he'd finally settled d= own and was starting to unwind. "All right. I can see why you want to be = discreet." He glanced at Spock over the desk, saw the affirmative nod. "I= 'll send Spock over your way. He'll be going back to duty in a few hours."= Kirk took a swallow of wine, noting McCoy had gone oddly silent. "Is tha= t all right with you?" As if that would make a difference. =20 "No, it's fine. He helped design the damn things; he should be able to rea= d between the silly electronic lines." McCoy sounded better now; more his = usual grumpy self. "We'll be down in Sickbay's Briefing Room, me an' Scott= ." =20 "Well, that's done," Kirk flipped the communicator shut. "Would you care f= or another glass?" =20 *** =20 "Did I ever tell you I was actually "in good" with the captain?" McCoy sna= pped. As Scott watched, the doctor paced the small confines of Sickbay's B= riefing room, determined to eat up space with long strides. "Look, I tried= ." =20 "He's nae coming down?" =20 "No, he's sending Spock down!" =20 "I dinnae exactly want ta discuss this wi' Spock." Scott was hushed and co= wed. =20 "You have a better idea? This is a dead Vulcan, ya know. Dead Vulcans mea= n live Vulcans have to get involved somewhere." =20 Scott was feeling particularly stubborn. "Whut if it could be a Romulan?" =20 McCoy rolled his eyes. "Romulans are more gracile. The gravity on their h= omeworld is a whole 0.3 percent lighter." =20 "Rigellian?" =20 McCoy simply stared at Scott a full minute before answering. "Rigellians f= latten the backs of their skulls with headbords during infantcy." =20 Scott meekly sat down. He sat back up again; Spock was just entering, his = bodyguards neatly posted outside the doorway. =20 Salutes went off like phasers. Spock nodded curtly. "Might I inquire what= would warrant a matter of such urgency that you would call me?" =20 There was nothing for it now. McCoy took a deep breath (mentally--he wasn'= t about to let Spock see him stall for nerve)--and nodded at Scott. =20 "We have a matter that concerns your input," Scott cleared his throat and g= lanced to McCoy, as if for help, but he knew better. McCoy was already imp= licated, and he wasn't going to just up and volunteer any more aid. "Tis a= Vulcan matter, sair." =20 Spock actually looked interested. Not a common expression for him. "Indee= d?" =20 Scott cleared his throat again. "Ye see, whilst I was overseen' the organi= zation o'Shuttlelounge B, I came across...remains o' a Vulcan." =20 Spock barely flickered an eyebrow, but one could tell he was not prepared f= or Scott to say such a thing. "I see," he murmured. "Doctor?" =20 "He called me in to verify it; I could tell it was a male Vulcan, 2.3 metre= s in height, weight unknown. It was just a skeleton someone had stuffed in= to a storage container labeled MEMORY ALPHA." =20 Spock folded his arms across his chest, thinking. "You pose a difficult pr= oblem." He admitted. =20 That was NOT what either human wanted to hear. "Whaddaya mean?" McCoy tri= ed to hold down the growing alarm in his psyche. "You're a Vulcan, you kno= w about Vulcan matters; we don't." =20 "Precisely." Spock exhaled through his nose. "Vulcan Laws of Privacy proh= ibit their handling by non-Vulcans, among other strict rules. Did you come= into physical contact with the remains?"=20=20 =20 "Hell, no." McCoy answered Spock's question with the scathing contempt it = fully deserved.=20 =20 "Nor I." Said Scott. =20 "Hm. The question is, how did he arrive here?" =20 "And how about, what to do with him?" McCoy wondered. "That's my most pre= ssing question. We've already lost the poor bastard once already." =20 If it would be possible, Spock's eyebrows shot to the ceiling. "You...lost= the remains?" =20 "Nae, not precisely," Scott broke in quickly. "They were moved whilst we w= ere tryin' tae get th'captain." =20 "But we found him." McCoy put up his hands. "Chekov apparantly moved him = by mistake. I just don't want it to happen again." =20 "Obviously not." Spock agreed. =20 "So, how the hell did he get here?" McCoy was rubbing his forehead, fighti= ng a headache with the aggressive application of shiatsu. =20 "I believe that falls under my question. If we learn how he came here, the= n we shall have a better idea of what to do with him." Spock folded his ar= ms in the at-rest pose. =20 "So now what?" McCoy wondered. "I don't know much about Vulcan mores--onl= y that there are too many of them--but I seem to recall the fewer non-Vulca= ns lay eyes on a Vulcan corpse, the better." =20 "Crudely put but correct. We should not advertise this matter to anyone on= the ship." =20 "What about the captain?" =20 Spock's face twitched. McCoy knew that look: He'd been hoping the doctor = wouldn't say precisely that. "The captain is a non-Vulcan. He would have = to look upon the remains in order to approve our actions, which technically= is not his problem; it is a Vulcan problem." =20 "But we already saw the remains," Scott pointed out unhappily. "Not that = I want tae make a point of it, but if I'm going' tae be executed or somethi= ng, I'd like to go ahead and know it now." =20 "I don't." McCoy snapped. "I haven't finished filing the easements on my = properties yet." =20 "Thot's because yer lawyer was--" Scott broke off at McCoy's arctic glare. =20 Spock sighed. It was a very patient sigh. "As you have already viewed the= remains, the damage is done, so to speak. From now on, no one else must b= e permitted to look upon the body. Doctor, where can it be discreetly stor= ed?" =20 "Well there's--" McCoy stopped. "No, that wouldn't work. I'm not allowed= to put a lock on the Necropsy lab." =20 "Yer not?" Scott was surprised. =20 "No." =20 "What if it were accidentally locked?" =20 "No can do, they're not made with locks." =20 "Why in God's name?" =20 "I don't know! I'm a doctor, not a paralegal! Necropsy is out!" =20 "Any of the other labs?" =20 "No." =20 "Somebody's quarters?" =20 "Not mine, sunshine. Spock?" =20 "Certainly not." Spock answered in frigid tones. =20 "You mean you have an irrational fear about corpses along with spiders?" =20 "The deceased could be of a divergent religion." Spock answered. McCoy's = comment about spiders had really bothered him, but, superior being of contr= ol that he was, he wasn't about to acknowledge it. "In which case, his cla= n could be intolerant of mine." =20 "You're being respectful to the feelings of a..." McCoy closed his eyes an= d gave up. "Never mind, I don't need to think about that..." He reached f= or another cup of coffee. "Well is there anything you can do?" =20 "Very little. If you had not informed me it was a Vulcan corpse, I could h= ave seen the remains. Now that I already know that it is a Vulcan skeleton= , I am honor-bound to keep to the mandates of Vulcan Oath and not view it."= He caught McCoy's expression. "You may be pragmatic to a fault, doctor, = but even you can understand the impracticality of possibly raising the ire = of the decedant's living relatives, who would then be obligated to kill me.= " =20 "But that's assuming you're of a divergent religion." McCoy said desperate= ly. "What could the odds be?" =20 "High enough," Spock said with finality. =20 Scott tried. "Well, what if it isn't a Vulcan? What if the doctor made a = mistake?" =20 There was a pause. A long one. Spock looked at McCoy, then at Scott. "Hi= ghly unlikely." He told the Engineer. =20 "I'd be thrilled if I wasn't so appalled." McCoy clutched his cup. =20 Spock exhaled again. "The matter is a forward one. The two of you have wi= tnessed the remains. You have informed me, which is correct procedure, and= I informed you what I can. A tricorder reading perhaps could render enoug= h data from the calcium structure that an Identity Scan could be made, but = such would take weeks." =20 "Are we in danger o' the wrath o' his family?" Scott wanted to know. =20 "Probably not." =20 Even McCoy looked up from his coffee at that. Spock was as likely to say "= probably" as he was to say, "crank." =20 "If they are logical beings, they should recognize the odds of someone even= tually discovering the remains." =20 "And if they aren't logical?" =20 "Then they should be gratifed that someone has discovered their lost relati= ve." =20 "Oh, my head." McCoy leaned his forehead into the palms of his hands, elbo= ws propped on the table. =20 Spock pushed himself up from the wall, straightening his already-perfect po= sture. "I will clear any avenues of action you may require to solve this c= onundrum. Alert me of any unexpected changes." He strode out of the Brief= ing Room without a glance. =20 McCoy's opinion, short, sweet, and physiologically impossible, was observed= long after Spock had cleared the hearing range of Vulcanoids. =20 "So now what?" =20 "I'm gonna have to do something I swore I'd never do," McCoy sighed. =20 "What?" =20 "Share my berth with a Vulcan." =09=09=09 --------------------------------- Do you Yahoo!? The all-new My Yahoo! =96 Get yours free!=20=20=20=20 [Non-text portions of this message have been removed] ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ ASCEM messages are copied to a mailing list. Most recent messages can be found at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ASCEML. NewMessage: