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Subject: NEW: The Healer Triad VOY C/f, C/P/f G to NC-17 1/14
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THE HEALER TRIAD
Author:  Stormraven and Mystic McKnight
Series: VOY=20
Codes: Chakotay/Tamara, Chakotay/Paris/Tamara eventually, J/Dalby,=20
P/T, K/S, Neelix/m
Part: 1/14
Rating: NC-17
Archive: Wherever just leave the credit please and let me know where=20
please.
Summary: Chakotay is enslaved some 3,000 light years from Voyager and=20

Commander Chakotay was enjoying some overdue shore leave on the M-
class planet below in Voyager's orbit. Samelon was very earth like so=20
much that it was hard for the crew to tell the difference.  With a=20
lightly packed travel bag over his shoulder, Chakotay had received=20
permission to spend two days up in the mountains as part of a=20
spiritual retreat.  With all of the pressures, he needed a break to=20
meditate, besides he was still stinging from Janeway pushing him away=20
again by insisting that their friendship remain as it was. He spent=20
the entire day hiking up the side of the mountain arriving near=20
sunset at the waterfalls described to him by their hosts.

After an invigorating swim in a calm pool, he sat down on a large=20
flat rock warmed by the sun and began his meditation. Two hours=20
later, he was so deep in meditation that even his hunter's senses=20
failed to warn him of the approaching danger. Snapping out of his=20
trance, he whipped his head around at the sound of rustling in the=20
underbrush that he never felt the stun beam hit him from behind and=20
darkness fell over him.

************

Captain Janeway was blaming herself for Chakotay's disappearance=20
while in her ready room nursing her sixth cup of coffee that day. Her=20
First Officer had been missing now for seven days and they were no=20
closer to finding him or any trace since the day he was overdue to=20
come back from shore leave.=20

`Damn, I promised I wouldn't cry again today.' Tears were slipping=20
from her blue eyes as she tried to read the PADD's in front of her.=20
She was only in her ready room because the EMH and Tuvok threatened=20
action unless she took care of herself with rest and food for the=20
next 48 hours.=20

************
Chakotay knew he was in serious trouble when he awakened to find=20
himself in the cargo hold of a ship bound and gagged minus uniform=20
and com badge. From the sounds and sights by the dim lighting, he=20
estimated there were more than a hundred in similar straits. Despite=20
the hard floor, he fell back to sleep.  Once he was awaken to be fed=20
and given a cup of bitter brew but was wonderful to his dry throat.=20
Attempting to communicate with the guards earned him a beating.

The starship full of slaves and other cargo entered a transwarp=20
conduit after three days of travel from Samelon taking the First=20
Officer of Voyager with it. Nearly three thousand light years away,=20
the ship reentered normal space and entered orbit around Rashela, an=20
M-class planet with an agrarian society and warp technology that=20
still ran on the monarchy system and slaves for cheap labor. There=20
the cargo was transported to an orientation and training center via=20
shuttlecraft.

Orientation was simple; Chakotay was bathed and given a pair of=20
simple knee length trousers to wear leaving his chest and back bear=20
to the elements. His bounds were replaced with silver metal bands 1=20
inch wide and placed securely on both wrists and ankles. Lastly a=20
collar of the same metal was fastened around his neck and torched=20
shut.  Training was simple. Keep your eyes downcast, do what you are=20
told and you'll be treated fairly. Easy enough when beaten to your=20
knees a few times to accomplish that part of the training to learn=20
how to assume the position for a master or mistress.  He had some=20
ideal of what was going on by watching everyone around him. Verbal=20
communication was next to impossible without his communicator for the=20
universal translator.  When he did try to communicate, he was beaten=20
so he kept to himself and thought about Kathryn and Voyager.

How long had he been gone from Voyager and was he still in the same=20
sector of space? He knew this was a different planet from experience,=20
but was he further along than Voyager, way behind or so far off the=20
path home that he may never be found by his crew and captain. He had=20
to stop a panic attack at the thought of being left alone as the only=20
human on this planet. Questions ran rampant through his head, but no=20
answers appeared. The most immediate thing was survival and hope for=20
the opportunity to get off this planet.

The next day, all the slaves were rounded up, shackled together and=20
herded down the street to the local auction block. In the holding=20
pen, Chakotay tried to look calm, but his head was pounding and his=20
heart was in his throat as he fought to keep his panic at bay.  The=20
sun was in his eyes and he squinted to try and see what was going=20
on.  One by one, they were put up on the block and sold off to the=20
highest bidder. He could only hope that his owner was kind to his=20
property.

There was a hand on his shoulder and he jumped looking with startled=20
eyes into the cold white eyes of the guard. He gestured for Chakotay=20
to step up to the block to be sold. A hard shove in his back sent him=20
stumbling up the steps when he hesitated. Each slave was placed with=20
the sunlight in his or her eyes. A fierce bidding took place,=20
although Chakotay didn't have any idea what the final price on his=20
head was. There was a shout and some giggling off to one side and a=20
hand pulling him from the block.

When it was over, he found himself in the custody of three teenage=20
humanoid boys.  The guards shackled his arms behind him and attached=20
a short walking chain between his ankles.  The tallest boy showed the=20
bookkeeper a medallion who in return handed over a paper receipt-
proof of the transaction. After a short leash was attached to his=20
collar, the boys led him away to their wagon, which was loaded with=20
supplies.  His leash was attached to the tailgate and the chain=20
between his ankles taken off so he could keep up with the wagon.

One boy, the youngest looking, brought him a drink of water for which=20
he was grateful and then they started off. One boy drove the team=20
while the others walked guard with what appeared to be phaser rifles=20
similar to the ones on Voyager. They moved at steady pace all day and=20
only stopping occasionally for water and a short meal during the heat=20
of the day.  It was late at night, two days later, when they arrived=20
at the village and Chakotay was stumbling blinding and ran into the=20
back of the wagon.  On the outskirts of the village, they stopped at=20
a two story house set back a ways from the road.

The boys expected him to help unload the wagon and care for the=20
livestock. He was so exhausted he didn't take much stock of his=20
surroundings as they guided him back into the kitchen where they=20
cleaned him up and fed him some gruel.  When he was done eating, they=20
shackled him to the kitchen roof beam by his forearms standing on his=20
tiptoes.  Turning the lights out, they giggled as they left Chakotay=20
in the darkness.=20

His limbs had long since lost any feeling, only the pain of standing=20
up for his tiptoes for two days kept him conscious while sweat and=20
tears blinded his eyes. A sound of the back door opening, a growl=20
caught his attention and a voice made his breath catch.

`Knock it off, Andy. We can deal with the supplies in the morning.' A=20
lovely female voice came through the doorway of the back hall. `I=20
just want my bed.'

He understood her! She was speaking English!

"Hello!" Chakotay cried out. `Please help me!'

He heard soft footsteps come into the kitchen and a soft lantern=20
light filled the kitchen. A blurry figure filled his vision and a low=20
growl followed by a sniffling of his ankles.

`Who the Sam Hell are you? How long have you been in my kitchen?' The=20
anger was evident in her voice.  He lifted his head towards the sound=20
of her voice and as swiftly lowered it remembering the training he=20
had received at the hands of the slavers.

`My god, are you human?' Her voice broke seeing the collar on his=20
neck and realized what the boys had done.  They had somehow found a=20
male human slave by the sheerest chance and had purchased him so she=20
could have help around the house and possibly a companion.  Lifting=20
his head, she saw the dark eyes in pain and the tattoo over his left=20
forehead. `You're the one.'

`Yes, I'm human.' He got out while another wave of pain rolled over=20
his body and she felt it with her empathic senses.

`You're hurt.' Her whole demeanor changed. The healer in her=20
automatically extended her power to him to heal his wounds dulling=20
the pain while she assessed his condition to determine the best way=20
to let the male down from the shackles without further injury to=20
himself.=20

Dragging a sturdy chair behind him, she explained everything that was=20
going to happen in a low soothing voice and Chakotay found himself=20
responding to her. `When I lower you down, place your arms around my=20
neck and shoulders so I can brace you to sit down. You have been=20
standing there for quite awhile, haven't you?'

`Two days,' he managed to whisper.

She got in front of him and braced herself against him, using her=20
left arm to push the lever that would lower him down. She looked up=20
and realized what a big man he was and was thankful for the darkness=20
to hide her sudden blush. The back of his feet hit the floor and he=20
screamed as relief flooded his body at such intensity, he swooned.=20
Feeling the shift in his weight, she got him seated and found herself=20
sitting in his lap with his bound hands draped around her neck and=20
shoulders. While waiting for him to awaken, she let her healing=20
energy ease the wounds and soreness of his body, which she was=20
beginning to discover, was quite beautiful.

His dark eyes flickered open and took in the position of her body and=20
his arms. She saw the smile on his handsome face when he became aware=20
of the situation.

`You know if I wasn't so tired from that last healing session, I'm=20
awful tempted to take advantage of you.' She smiled wickedly at=20
him. `What are you called, handsome?'

`Chakotay. Can I take a rain check on that being taken advantage of?'=20
His smiled widened and his dimples flashed.

`We'll see about that rain check. Now, just a couple of small details=20
and we can get some sleep.' She ran her fingers over his arms and=20
found the injuries were healed. `Raise your arms, please.'

`My injuries. They are gone and I am not so tired anymore. How did=20
you do that?' He asked curiously.

`I am a Healer.' She replied as he lifted his arms.

Sliding off of his lap was hard to do because it was a comfortable=20
place to be and she found herself not wanting to leave. Rummaging=20
around in a drawer, she pulled out a gold medallion and a pair of=20
pliers. His eyes were unreadable as she turned towards him and he=20
pulled away from her hand.

`What is that?' Chakotay asked with ice in his voice.

`The mark of the Healer Tamara. That's me. I know your command of the=20
language=85'

`That's bullshit! It`s your sign of you ownership over me.' He=20
blurted out and watched with horror as the friendly green eyes turn=20
icy with anger.

`Well, gee whiz. I guess it is, so get down off of your high horse=20
and learn a few facts about this planet and society before you decide=20
to lead the revolution, pal.' The anger and sarcasm dripped from her=20
voice as she lifted his chin and used the pliers to fasten the=20
medallion to his collar. `I've been on this planet for five or six=20
years and I believe we can help each other, but only if you decide to=20
cooperate and not turn into a fucking martyr.'

He could feel the anger coming off of her in waves and felt ashamed=20
for saying what he had. Tamara turned away from him and put the=20
pliers away as a massive furball came bouncing into the kitchen and=20
wrapped his massive paws around her ankles sprawling her on top of=20
him with a growl. Chakotay froze.

`I'm sorry, Andy.' She gave the furball a big hug. `This is Chakotay.=20
I hope he'll stay and at least give us a chance to help him get off=20
this planet.'

Andy smiled at Chakotay with his whole furry canine snout and 4 inch=20
incisors and a set of three purple eyes watched him. A black tongue=20
reached out and slurped him on the face, while sniffing him to get=20
his scent for memory.=20

`You must be a good man if Andy trusts you with my safety. Usually=20
when I get upset or angry, he rips the house apart to get whomever is=20
making me upset.' Tamara explained as she put the teakettle on and=20
than opened up the back door. `Andy, guard.' The dark furball leaped=20
out and vanished into the nighttime shadows.

`My apologies, Healer Tamara.' Chakotay said sounding contrite while=20
realizing he did indeed need her help and also keeping his eyes=20
downcast. They needed to make the best of this situation and=20
antagonizing her would only make it worse.

`Would you care for some tea? I imagine you are quite dehydrated.'=20
She pulled two cups down from the cupboard and placed them on the=20
table.

`I would, please. Do you have anything to eat?' He also lifted his=20
wrists to show that they were still chained together.

`Stand up.' Tamara said as she placed sweetener and cream beside the=20
teacups.

Chakotay stood up slowly, his legs felt like jelly as he grew dizzy=20
and blackness overtook him falling to the floor before she could=20
catch him. Tamara sighed and sent Andy off to the village for help to=20
get the big man into a bed. Kneeling, she traced the blue tattoo on=20
his forehead curious about it from a vision she had had of this same=20
man two years hence. A growl from Andy told her that help was on the=20
way.

A short time later, Chakotay was bathed, changed into new clothes and=20
placed in bed in the back room of the house. Reading his vital signs=20
with her healing sense showed her that he was literally exhausted=20
mentally and emotionally. She sensed an auburn haired woman with blue-
gray eyes was behind it, but she needed to wait until both of them=20
were fully rested before exploring his pains. Drinking her tea, she=20
studied his features and found him to be of Native American descent=20
and drop dead gorgeous. She blushed fiercely while letting her=20
thoughts and eyes roam at will over his body.

`Does it meet with your approval, Healer Tamara?' He opened dark eyes=20
full of questions, concern and a bit of humor.

`Yes, it does.' Tamara grew bold. `You go to a lot of trouble to keep=20
my attention and I've only known you less than a night.' She grinned=20
at him.

`I try.' He smiled.
She snorted in mock exasperation. `Get some sleep, Chakotay.' And=20
went upstairs to her room.

Andy tried to lick Sarina's ankle as she entered the house quietly to=20
begin breakfast and get the Healer's appointments lined up for the=20
day. A low moan from the upstairs bedroom caught her attention.=20
Knowing what to expect, Sarina grabbed the medicine bag and headed=20
for the stair, not showing any surprise when Chakotay appeared on the=20
stairway behind her. The whole village had known of his arrival=20
before sunrise.

`What's wrong?' He hissed in her ear.

`Most likely a dazzle headache from doing too many major healings=20
last night. If it is, you close the curtains while I get some=20
medicine in her.' Sarina whispered over her shoulder.

Entering the bedroom, they saw the healer lying very still while=20
clutching at her head and moaning in pain. Sarina opened the bag of=20
medicine while Chakotay closed black curtains on the three bay=20
windows. Pouring a thick clear liquid in a cup, Sarina leaned over=20
the huge bed.

`Tamara, drink this.'

`Is it the clear stuff?' One green eye peeked through her fingers.

`Yes, it is.'

`Don't want any nightmares, Sarina. Go away.' She sounded like a=20
small child not wanting any of the bad tasting medicine.

`Looks like this fine man standing behind me can chase those=20
nightmares away.' Sarina coaxed her to take the cup.

`Chakotay, will you please stay and keep the nightmares away?' The=20
pain in her green eyes was evident.

`As you wish, my lady.' Not quite certain what else to say he stayed=20
silent as he watched her drink the nasty tasting liquid he could tell=20
by the loathing on her face. `What can I do?' he asked Sarina.

`Sit by her for now. Hold her hand; talk to her or whatever she=20
wants. I'm going to get a few things and I'll be back shortly.'=20
Sarina left the bottle of medicine on the nightstand and went back=20
downstairs.

Chakotay stood there unsure what to do for her. If they were on=20
Voyager, the Doctor could take care of this with a hypo spray.
`Blankets tangled.' Tamara whispered seeing the indecision on his=20
face. He straightened the bedcovers making her comfortable and=20
noticed her trim ankles and slender calves.

`Is there anything else I can do for you?' He sat down on the bed=20
beside her.

`Tell me a story, Chakotay.'

Sarina appeared in the doorway with a tray and set it down on the=20
dresser. `I brought some cool water and cloths for her forehead and=20
eyes. There's tea for the both of you and breakfast if either of you=20
are hungry.'

`Thank you.' He brought the bowl of cool water and cloths over to the=20
nightstand. Wetting a cloth and wringing it out, he gently place it=20
on Tamara's forehead.

`You've done this before, handsome.' Her words were becoming slurred=20
as the medicine started to take effect.

`My mother used to get migraines once in awhile and I would help my=20
aunts take care of her like this.' He smiled as she started to drift=20
off.

`You're hired.' She smiled as she went to sleep.

Sarina motioned for Chakotay to follow her downstairs.=20

`What about Healer Tamara?' He asked when they reached the kitchen.

`She'll be out for awhile. Has she explained your duties yet?' Sarina=20
poured two cups of tea and they sat at the kitchen table.

`No, she hasn't. I wasn't quite up to anything last night.' He sipped=20
the hot tea gratefully.

`So we noticed when we put you to bed last night.' Sarina=20
smiled. `It's simple. You were bought to be a body slave. To take=20
care of Healer Tamara and help out around the yards in your spare=20
time.'

`Why me and not someone else like another woman?' Chakotay asked as=20
he felt destiny stepping in.

`You are also big and strong enough to carry her home. Sometimes, the=20
healing takes more out of her than she will let on and collapse=20
afterwards. The Royal Family has a very special interest in Healer=20
Tamara since she is the only one of her kind on this planet.' Sarina=20
watched Andy saunter in and lie down beside Chakotay wrapping his=20
massive paws around the man's ankles in absolute trust. `I see Andy=20
is quite taken with you.'
Chakotay reached down and found the spiky looking fur extremely soft=20
and a deep grating sound from behind the closed purple eyes. `I see.=20
There's more to this than that. I sense that you both knew of me=20
already before I even arrived here.'

`Two years ago, she had a vision of a human male with a blue tattoo=20
such as the one you have. Tamara painted this a few days later.'=20
Sarina got up and uncovered a painting on the wall of the kitchen. It=20
was his own face he was staring at. The black hair, dark eyes, tattoo=20
and dimples, he knew what Sarina said was true.

`We believe some things are destiny. It appears this is one of those=20
times.' He looked at Sarina. She was a native of this planet with the=20
throat and shoulder ridges she had; Tamara on the other hand was from=20
Earth or a human colony in the alpha quadrant. `How did Healer Tamara=20
come to be here?'

`You'll have to get her story from the source if your owner wishes to=20
tell you. I think it is time for you to resume your duties upstairs.=20
I need to reschedule her appointments.' She left the kitchen and went=20
into the office.

Going back upstairs, he straightened up the bedroom drank the tepid=20
tea and changed the cloth on Tamara's forehead. She was sleeping=20
painfree for the time being and he had time to study her. Another=20
redhead in his life, he had a sudden thought of Kathryn Janeway. He=20
wondered if they were still looking for him and if the Calvary would=20
come over the hill.

He dozed off and on through the morning sitting in the chair while=20
getting up every so often to change the warm cloth on her forehead=20
for a cool one. A whimpering caught his attention as he was startled=20
awake from the sounds in her bed. The nightmares had started.=20
Carefully, he sat on the edge of the bed and stroked her face trying=20
to calm her down. Instead, she got more agitated and screamed when he=20
tried to hold her down. Now he was at a loss of what to do for her.

`You're going to have to lie down, pull her close to you and reassure=20
her that everything is okay.' A very irritated voice came from the=20
doorway.

Chakotay looked up to see Sarina glaring at him from the doorway.=20
Under her gaze, he gathered Tamara to his chest and lay down beside=20
her with her back to his chest and he crossed his arms in front of=20
her. Almost at once, she calmed down and snuggled against his warmth.

`Shhhh, Tamara. It's okay. I'm here and the nightmares are gone.' He=20
glared at Sarina before he remembered to downcast his eyes.=20

`I'll bring some lunch up after a while. She'll be hungry when she=20
awakens.' And she was gone.

The healing part of Tamara reached out to the pain of the pair and=20
enveloped them in a deep healing sleep. It lasted through the day and=20
into the night giving them both peace and mental healing they both=20
needed. Sarina checked on them from time to time, but otherwise left=20
them alone. Sleep was the best medicine.

Tamara awakened to a clear head, a warm body at her back and a large=20
hand under her shirt playing with her breasts. She went rigid in fear=20
at this invasion and felt him pull back and remove his hand. Going=20
from fear to raging anger with her instinct for survival, she reared=20
up and brought her left elbow down smashing into Chakotay's face full=20
force, knocking him out instantly. Leaping from the bed, she tripped=20
on the blankets and fell heavily to the floor landing on her left hip.

`Sarina,' she yelled as she rolled over to examine her hip and winced=20
at the pain in her left elbow. There was going to be a big bruise by=20
the end of the day. There was no response from Sarina, but she could=20
hear Andy whiffing around the back door. Reaching in to her=20
nightstand, she pulled out a wicked looking long dagger.

Chakotay came to a few moments later and felt blood running down his=20
face from a broken nose and a cracked cheekbone. Pain lanced through=20
his head as he sat up and tried to stem the flow of blood. Out of the=20
corner of his eye, he saw Tamara sprawled on the floor pointing a=20
large dagger in his direction. He felt the anger, fear and shame=20
radiantly from her.

It was puzzling to him for just a moment until he realized what he=20
had done and felt a stab of fear for himself and a wave of shame and=20
self loathing washed over him. Last night had felt so right with her=20
in his arms and the peace she had given him while he had slept. His=20
hand had gone under her shirt, because he had been dreaming of=20
Kathryn Janeway. Another wave of shame filled him as she glared at=20
him with icy green eyes. Her copper hair was flowing over her=20
shoulders and he immediately put his dark eyes on the floor because=20
he could no longer bear to look at the pain he had caused her.

`You're hurt. Come here, Chakotay.' Once again her demeanor changed=20
to that of a healer.  Only healing, love and concern filled her now=20
abruptly replacing the anger, fear and shame. The dagger fell to the=20
floor, as she reached out her hand to him.=20

Chakotay found himself responding to her voice as he slipped out of=20
the bed and knelt at her side full of shame, fear and self-loathing=20
at what he had done to her. Tears fell from his dark eyes as her=20
hands caressed his face and he felt the cool healing wash over him.=20
When she was done, he placed his head in her lap crying for her=20
forgiveness.
She gathered him in her arms and held him while he cried himself out=20
for this situation, his actions against her and the loss of Kathryn=20
and Voyager. Humming softly, she caressed his hair and brow while=20
doing a surface scan of his thoughts and projecting some calm into=20
his chaotic whirlwind. Awhile later, he calmed down and looked up=20
into her green eyes to find forgiveness and concern for him.

`I am sorry, Healer Tamara. Can you ever forgive me?' he asked softly=20
daring to hope a little that this beautiful lady could forgive his=20
transgressions.

`You are forgiven, Chakotay.' She smiled at him. `However, I do have=20
a slight problem.'

`Whatever you command, my lady.'

`Can you rotate my left leg for me? I popped my hip out of joint when=20
I landed on the floor.'

`Are you in pain?' He got to his feet squatting beside her with a=20
surge of panic and guilt.

`No, I am not in pain, Chakotay. Focus on my words and not your=20
emotions.' Tamara stated. `Now, help me up. Time enough to deal with=20
the emotions later.'

Gently, he lifted her off of the floor and was rewarded with a loud=20
pop, as her hip slip back into place on it's own.

`Put me down, Chakotay. I am not a porcelain doll.'

`I am sorry, Healer.' He kept his eyes averted as he put her down.

`Now go and fix some breakfast and tea. I'm famished.' She remarked=20
and watched Chakotay's smile lit up his eyes and his dimples flashed=20
making her weak in the knees.

Coming down the stairs, he heard Sarina coming in the back door with=20
Andy on her heels. As he hit the last step, he felt the furball rush=20
by him and dash up the stairs to his mistress. There was a squeal of=20
delight from the bedroom.

After breakfast and going over her appointments with Sarina, Tamara=20
headed into the village with Chakotay in tow while Andy was running=20
circles around them and chasing birds.

`What species is Andy, Healer Tamara?' Chakotay asked as he shifted=20
the medicine bag from one hand to the other.
`The closest translation I've ever come up with is mood-sensor. He's=20
very sensitive to emotions.' Tamara answered. She sensed more=20
presence nearby. `The children are nearby watching you, Chakotay.'

 `How many children are in the village?' he was curious.

`Around three hundred. This is the main orphanage for the planet.'=20
Tamara answered.

With his background in hunting and tracking from his forefathers, he=20
could feel curious eyes watching him from the trees and underbrush.=20
He saw Tamara smiling at him and he responded with a big smile of his=20
own dimples and all. `Kids are the same from one side of the galaxy=20
to the other, aren't they? Curious about everything.'

`I guess so. I'll have to take your word on it, Chakotay.' Something=20
sad passed in front of her eyes for a brief second and her smile=20
returned just as quickly.

The children got bolder as the entered the village and soon the=20
healer was surrounded by more than a dozen all trying to get her=20
attention.  She answered all their questions with ease, laughed at=20
their jokes and hugged them when they showed signs of crying. It was=20
quite a crowd by the time they reached the medical clinic where=20
Tamara had her office; Tamara waved bye and shooed them off for it=20
was almost time for school. They were still a little leery of=20
Chakotay.

`They adore you, Healer Tamara,' Chakotay chuckled as they went into=20
the clinic and entered a brightly lit hallway. There was a large=20
waiting room and reception area at the end of the hall. Tamara=20
stepped through a door bearing her sigil like that on his medallion.=20

Sitting at her desk, Tamara activated her computer terminal to bring=20
up her list of appointments barring emergencies. Chakotay was=20
interested in what kind of technology the planet had. Were they a=20
space faring race or just had visitors from time to time.

`Healer Tamara, do these people have star ships?' He tried not to let=20
his excitement show.

`Chakotay,' Tamara commanded him telepathically. `Shut-up.'

He glanced at her in sudden shock. `Now assume the position and stay=20
there until further notice.' Her sudden fury took him by surprise as=20
he dropped to the floor.

`How dare you speak until spoken too=85?' She began a verbal triad at=20
him. Mentally, she said, `Chakotay, the wrong words or gestures could=20
bring the government down on us. There are eyes and ears everywhere.=20
Please play along and I'll explain everything later.' `Perhaps, I=20
should send you for retraining.'

Chakotay caught on and quickly started trembling in fear while=20
mouthing pleas for forgiveness. With his forehead pressed to the=20
floor and ass high in the air made him a delectable sight to=20
Tamara. `Gods, I would like to ravish this handsome hunk. Oh, well!'=20
She sighed. `I can dream. Maybe I would have a chance to help him=20
gain some peace in his life if this Kathryn didn't have such a hold=20
over his sensitive soul. If you love someone enough, you should be=20
able to set him or her free to find peace. It's only been a day and=20
you're in love with him or is it a simple case of lust. Or just the=20
loneliness of not having another human around for so long.'

A tear fell down her cheek as he turned his to stare at her in wonder=20
noting the trail of the teardrop. Tamara did not realize that the=20
link between Chakotay and her was still open and he was hearing her=20
thoughts. `Time to get some fucking paperwork done. Creator, I just=20
want to go home, I'm so tired of it all. Let's see it would be about=20
2006 right now in California. Mom and Dad retired and the=20
grandchildren graduating from high school. I bet they would love to=20
know about Kathryn. She's got her grandfather's eyes and=20
recklessness.' Images of a four-year girl with red hair and green=20
eyes appeared before him.

`Work, Tamara. First appointment is after lunch. Broken hip. Letter=20
to Labor Board regarding Chakotay's status as slave or is there=20
someway to have him as a free person like myself.' The link closed=20
down between them when her concentration shifted fully on her work.=20
Lunch came and he was allowed up long enough to eat, have a drink and=20
relieve himself in the bathroom.

`Chakotay, there's a tree out back with a bench if you wish to try=20
and meditate for awhile. The kids won't be out of school for a least=20
another hour.' Tamara remarked as he stepped out of the bathroom. `I=20
have a translation program for you. It will only take a moment to=20
give it too you.'

`Yes, Healer.' He stood in front of her with his eyes staring at her=20
shoes.

Placing her hands on both sides of his face, she mentally downloaded=20
the translation memory into his memory. When he briefly glanced at=20
her, he saw the tears in her eyes.

`What is it, Healer?' He reached up and brushed the tears from her=20
silky smooth cheeks.

`Kathryn is a lucky woman. You had better go. My next appointment=20
will be here momentarily.' She disappeared into the exam room leaving=20
him confused by her erratic behavior and wondering how she knew about=20
Kathryn Janeway.

Stepping out the back door, he quickly found the tree she was=20
referring too. It closely resembled a huge willow tree and he was=20
fairly well hidden under the branches sitting on the bench to enjoy a=20
little time to himself. Finding his calm and center, he settled into=20
a light trance to meditate.

Tamara finished seeing her patients for healing and made plans to eat=20
supper at the clinic. It would be a long night with three couples=20
expected to deliver their babies tonight. She grabbed another cup of=20
heartleaf tea to get some energy in her. Heartleaf tea had the=20
closest thing to caffeine on this planet. What she wouldn't give for=20
a cup of real coffee. Sarina dropped off a list of appointments for=20
two days hence since she would be up most of the night and sleeping=20
through the next day. Finishing her tea, she poured a fresh cup for=20
Chakotay and stepped outside the back door of the clinic and smiled=20
at the sight that met her eyes.

Chakotay was surrounded by nearly half of the children of the village=20
while telling the story of lazy coyote and busy beaver. Three of the=20
littlest ones were in his lap and arms while all the others sat=20
quietly listening aptly to his tale. She caught his eye and raised=20
the cup to show she had something for him to drink. He waved for her=20
to come over and sit with them.

Weaving her way through the mass of youth, Tamara managed to seat=20
herself on the bench and not spill the drinks. He finished the tale=20
leaving big smiles on their glowing faces. Gratefully, Chakotay=20
sipped the tea she handed to him.

`I hope you know some more stories, handsome.' Tamara chuckled.

`Why?' He was mildly curious.

`Because you just became a storyteller and you will get no peace from=20
them.' She indicated the children. `Right, guys?'

The children cheered which made Chakotay blush at his new status in=20
the village and Tamara laughed.

`May we please have another story?' A little four-year old boy with=20
green eyes and red hair asked looking up at the big man without fear,=20
just wonder.

`Healer Tamara, do you mind?' Chakotay smiled with real pleasure=20
showing his dimples at her. She could see he truly enjoyed the being=20
with the children and they were starting to like him as well.=20
`This is between you and them, Chakotay. I just came out to tell you=20
to get a nap. It's going to be an all night session.' Tamara threw up=20
her hands in mock surrender and leaving him to the mercy of the young=20
ones.

The night session was long with three births, but Chakotay observed=20
that Tamara handled it all with ease right down to the broken wrist=20
that came in during the middle of a contraction. He helped where he=20
could and ended up falling asleep from lack of a nap. The children=20
had dragged three more tales out of him before the adults had=20
returned to claim them for evening dinner and activities.

Sunlight was peeking in the windows when he felt a hand running=20
through his hair and down his back. `Hey, sleepyhead! It's time to=20
get going.'

`Sorry,' he stood and stretched. `How do you do this?'

`Practice. Plus I get this whole day to sleep and just be lazy.' She=20
grabbed her bag and headed out the back door with Chakotay on her=20
heels while Andy came lumbering up wanting to play.=20=09

Dropping her bag, she started to wrestle with furball while Chakotay=20
looked on in amazement. A few moments later, they ganged up on=20
Chakotay by tackling him to the ground and wrestling with him in the=20
soft grass. He responded in delight by tickling Tamara on her ribs=20
until she squealed. Andy jumped on Chakotay and he came up with a=20
mouthful of fur choking and laughing.

Tamara and Chakotay were laughing so hard that they didn't notice the=20
Prince and his entourage standing nearby looking on with disapproval.

`I see you have time for play, my dear Healer. Maybe I should assign=20
you more responsibility.' Prince Deevick, Crown Prince of Rashela=20
announced his presence to the pair.

Tamara responded to the Prince standing there by getting up, giving=20
him a short bow from the waist, and remain standing in his presence.=20
Andy crouched low to the ground beside while Chakotay stayed low to=20
the ground. His sixth sense told him to stay invisible as possible=20
with this man.

`Good morning, Prince Deevick. What brings you to this little corner=20
of your Kingdom?' Tamara asked with a light sneer in her voice.=20
Chakotay felt a stab of fear and wondered at her foolishness or=20
daring.

`Why I came here to check on you, my dear. Kathryn is wondering are=20
you coming for your monthly visit in a few days.' Deevick asked as he=20
appraised his Royal Healer from head to foot. Reaching out, he pulled=20
a blade of grass from her red hair, which was tumbling down around=20
her shoulders. She didn't flinch, but Andy growled and Chakotay was=20
starting to get a little angry himself at the prince.

`Tell my beloved daughter, I will most certainly be there.' Tamara=20
said with laughter in her voice.

`You know, my dear. We should make another child. We throw such=20
beautiful offspring.' Deevick placed his arm around her waist and=20
drew her close to him smelling the perfume of her body and hair.

Andy's growl grew dangerous and he crouched to leap and Tamara could=20
hear a rumble of protest in Chakotay's chest. Tamara pushed herself=20
away from Deevick and warned them, `Quiet, guys.'

`This must be your new toy. I heard about him, a male from your own=20
species, is he not?' The prince turned his attention upon=20
Chakotay. `Stand up, so I can see you, slave.'

Deevick could see the rage in the big man being held in check by=20
incredible control. The slave kept his eyes downcast, as a tremor for=20
control shook his entire body. Tamara stepped in between them with a=20
hand to her forehead.

`I fear, my prince, I have need of this one's assistance. After such=20
a long healing session, I fear I may have a headache coming on.'

Tamara rubbed her forehead to emphasize the point. It was a bold lie=20
and both knew it, yet it also allowed the prince to bow out and not=20
lose face in front of his peers. Deevick knew if he pushed her, she=20
would find a way to flaunt him in public and shame him. Her healing=20
power and their daughter were the only things between her and death=20
at this stage of their games. Both also knew that one day, a dazzle=20
headache could kill her.

`You need to rest, my dear. I hope the headache will not impede your=20
upcoming visit to our daughter.' With that, he turned on his heels=20
and left followed by his entourage.

Andy and Chakotay were wound up like springs as their eyes fixated on=20
Tamara's frozen stance. Chakotay went to move towards her to offer=20
comfort when a look from those icy green eyes froze him to the spot.=20
A few calming breaths later, she relaxed and Andy whimpered in relief=20
as his tongue reached out and licked her ankle.

`Tam, are you all right?' His voice was worried. He would have been=20
happy to throttle the prince for her.

`It's getting late. Retrieve the bag and let's go.' She started=20
walking along the road to the house without a backward glance while=20
Andy walked beside her with worry in his big purple eyes. Grabbing=20
the bag, Chakotay trotted after her.

Arriving at the house, he made breakfast while she took a shower and=20
crawled into bed falling asleep almost instantly. When Chakotay=20
arrived with the tray of food and tea, he sighed when he found her=20
asleep. Setting the tray down on the side table in case she awaken,=20
he went back downstairs to his room in the back of the house lying=20
down on the bed, but sleep eluded him.

For the first time since he had been captured, Chakotay had time to=20
think things out. Like how to find a way off this planet and maybe=20
find a way back to Voyager. First he needed to find out exactly in=20
relation to the last place he knew Voyager had been. Looking out the=20
window, he watched the sun rise higher in the sky and wondered if=20
Voyager was still looking for him or had they given up and headed for=20
home once more.

Healer Tamara, now that lady was a contradiction in terms. Sweet and=20
gentle one second, ice and hard the next plus the erratic behavior.=20
She said she would tell him her story, but they had not gotten a=20
chance to do it yet. At least, she had a wonderful sense of humor and=20
was a flirt to boot. Courage and bravado too, the way she took on the=20
Prince idiot. It was apparent there was a history of sorts between=20
them. Somehow, they managed to have a daughter between them and she=20
was living with the Prince.

He was starting to get sleepy and nod off when there was a scream=20
from upstairs and Andy started to howl in fury. Heart pounding,=20
Chakotay sprang off the bed and ran upstairs to find Tamara drenched=20
in sweat in the midst of a nightmare. She was thrashing around and=20
tangled in the bedclothes. Gathering her in his arms, he held her to=20
his chest whispering softly in her ear while she gradually calmed=20
down enough so he could straighten the bedclothes.  Curling up with=20
Tamara in his arms, he fell soundly asleep.

In the early afternoon, he opened his eyes and found a pair of=20
mischievous green eyes watching him intently. He blushed. He reached=20
over and brushed the red hair back from her face. With the back of=20
his hand, he caressed the side of her face from cheek to chin and=20
than withdrew his hand.

`Been awake long?' he asked feeling barriers pop up between them.

`Long enough to know I like watching you sleep,' she mused. `I can=20
see the little boy in your face while you're relaxed in sleep.'

`Is that good or bad?' he quipped with a smile as the barriers came=20
back down.

`Both and trouble for me, I can see," she smiled rolling her eyes up=20
at the ceiling.  He chuckled feeling more relaxed around her than=20
before.

`Do I get to hear your story?' His dark eyes were serious.

`All right. Where do you want me to start?'

`In the beginning like every good story.' He said as he settled back=20
against the headboard.

`In the fall of 2002, I was on vacation in England visiting=20
Stonehenge. I had always wanted to visit that particular spot. It's a=20
power point in the midst of quite a few legends. My sister and I got=20
there very early and had the whole place to ourselves. After visiting=20
Stonehenge, we decided to hike up the nearby hills.' Her eyes closed=20
remembering. `It was foggy as only England can get the good fogs.  My=20
sister went back to her car to get her water bottle and I went up=20
ahead to look for a descent trail. Going around a cliff face, I heard=20
a crackle pop and saw a bluish and silvery outline as I walked into=20
what Deevick tells me was a spatial and temporal rift. Some kind of=20
fracture of time and I wound up at Deevick's feet literally.' Tamara=20
paused and looked at Chakotay. `Does any of this make sense to you?'

`Actually, it does. I can explain it all the details if you want to=20
hear them.' He answered. `I would like to hear the rest of your tale=20
first.'

`I was in a great deal of pain from doing some kind of mutation=20
coming through the rift.  It was weeks before I realized anything and=20
everything was wrong with my life. My first clue was watching three=20
moons rise one night and all the stars were in the wrong place. Than=20
I noticed the people around me were different, human looking, but=20
with differences in the throat and neck ridges. That took awhile to=20
get used too. Meanwhile, Deevick and his gang of scientists had=20
figured out what was happening to me. I now had the ability to heal=20
and some telepathic sending and receiving, not much at actual mind=20
reading.' Her face showed the displeasure of the unpleasant=20
experiences.

`Three months had passed and I acquired Andy. He's a story for=20
another time. Deevick's cronies put over a hundred implants in my=20
brain and body to monitor and learn how I heal. It had become second=20
nature to me by than to heal injuries and commune with the Royal=20
Telepaths. Deevick tried to do some kind of programming on me, but=20
the implants blocked it so I just pretend when it comes to the=20
healing around him, but not for much longer. Most of the implants=20
have been burnt out when I get angry. Anyway, Deevick had moved me to=20
the Palace to be the First Royal Healer and be in constant attendance=20
on the Royal Family. This of course, threw me in the middle of the=20
politics of the palace.' Her voice grew husky at the memories.=20
Chakotay got up and brought her a drink of water for her grateful=20
throat.

`A couple of months later, one of Deevick's peers dared him to find=20
out what a human female was like in bed. I mean the guy has a harem=20
when he decided to take up the dare. Deevick got his chance the night=20
I saved the King, his father, after the assassination attempt. Since=20
I was standing right next to the King, I was able to heal his wounds=20
right away. By the time the physician got there the King would've=20
died of his injuries.'

`It was not pleasant. Deevick said he was showing me gratitude for=20
saving his father's life. I was having a dazzle headache at the time=20
and couldn't put up a fight except for yelling, which didn't do me=20
any good. Deevick had his way with me and as a result I had Kathryn=20
nine months later. I fell in love with her at first sight and I ended=20
up staying in the palace for another year.' Tears fell down her face.=20
When Chakotay wanted to comfort her, she waved her hand no at him.

`The tension between Deevick and I had been building for months=20
erupting into public spats and embarrassing the prince along with the=20
Royal Family. The King decided to separate us and I was moved here to=20
the orphanage and assigned to work in the medical facility. Kathryn=20
stays at the palace and I get a few days each moon triad to visit=20
with her.' Her voice trailed off as she glanced at the picture of her=20
daughter on the dresser.

`She's not allowed to come and stay with her mother?' Chakotay=20
couldn't believe that they wouldn't let the child stay with her=20
mother on occasion.=20

`Kathryn is a princess of the blood and next in line to the throne=20
after Deevick hence she has to stay protected. I have been in the=20
village nearly four years now.' She finished and stretched.=20

`I'll bet it's been pretty lonely for you,' Chakotay found himself=20
wanting to hug and comfort her, but she had drawn a boundary.

`Between work and sleeping, it can get pretty busy. However, there=20
are days when I want to scream and kill something in a bloody rage.'=20
She said venomously and he actually drew back from her in surprise.

`Kill something?' There was an actual trace of fear in his=20
voice. `Have you killed before?'

`I've killed three assassins and four of Deevick's guards when he=20
tried to ambush me a couple of years ago. Andy has gotten three of=20
his own. Each death made me sick for days and I still feel guilty.'=20
She admitted. `Most of the time, I go for long walks or runs to work=20
the anger out. I believe if it wasn't for Kathryn or the children I=20
would've gone over the edge a while back.'

`What stopped you?' He prompted falling into his role as counselor=20
like he was back on Voyager as First Officer.

`You.' She stated flatly.

`Me?' He was taken back by her answer.

`I had a vision of you in the market place being sold as a slave and=20
you were looking at me for help. I painted your picture so we could=20
keep an eye out for you.' He looked so puzzled, she had to=20
laugh. `You have the answers to the questions, Chakotay.'

`Which questions are those, Tam?' He asked softly.=20

`Later. When we get to the palace in a few days.' She crawled out of=20
the bed and did a full body stretch, which caught his attention, and=20
he felt a tightening in his groin. `Let's get something to eat, I'm=20
starving.' She headed for the stairs with him following close behind=20
with the untouched breakfast tray.

After hearing her story and the odds she had gone through to survive,=20
his admiration and respect for her grew. He was still leery of her=20
mood swings but chalked it up to the stress she was living under all=20
this time. When they had eaten, they hiked up into the hills to watch=20
the sunset.

************
Week 4

Tom Paris couldn't believe it as he sat down at the helm of Voyager=20
in a daze. Commander Chakotay was missing and the Captain was giving=20
the order this morning for Voyager to continue on her way to the=20
Alpha Quadrant.

The Commander has disappeared while on shore leave nearly a month ago=20
and outside of finding his communicator and uniform there was no=20
trace to be found of the Maquis captain. There were reports of=20
raiding parties in the area and other people missing from local=20
villages and outlying areas with no clues to there whereabouts=20
either.=20

The planetary government admitted that they had only a vague idea of=20
where the raiders had taken the missing people via the local=20
transwarp conduit. Without the right technology, there was no way for=20
Janeway to track down the ships carrying the stolen people.

`Captain?' Tom questioned with a tear in his blue eyes looking up at=20
her to confirm the orders.

`You heard me, Mr. Paris. Set course for the Alpha Quadrant at warp=20
six.' Janeway said coldly as she turned to sit in her command chair.

`Yes, Captain.' The helmsman said quietly with a lump in his throat=20
and blurry vision as his fingers danced over the panel. Never again=20
would he tease or anger Chakotay or feel his presence behind him. He=20
wondered how B'Elanna was doing. No one could fill Chakotay's shoes.

The entire crew mourned the loss.

************
Chakotay found himself slipping into Tamara's routine of clinic work=20
and all night sessions while enjoying the children after lunch with a=20
tale or two whenever time permitted. At the house, he kept it clean,=20
cooked their meals and worked in the yards. He watched Healer Tamara=20
as she healed the scrapes, bumps and bruises on the children. She=20
listened to their woes and held them while they cried or just needed=20
some reassurance. Here with the children is where she showed her=20
greatest potential with patience and gentleness. He could see the=20
love she had for youngsters.

`Were you a teacher back on Earth?' Chakotay asked on their way back=20
to the house.

`No. I never got around to finishing college. I was the oldest of=20
eight kids so I got a lot of practice in babysitting. Before I came=20
to Rashela, I worked for a school district in California.' She=20
smiled. `I've had a lot of people telling me I should be a teacher,=20
but I don't have the patience.'

`I don't think you give yourself enough credit, Healer Tamara. The=20
children adore you and I see them hanging on your words and actions.'=20
Chakotay replied honestly seeing what she didn't.

`Don't say anymore. I refuse to get close to the children. What=20
Deevick is doing unthinkable and I can't handle the pain. I enjoy=20
their company and through their eyes I see the world as it was meant=20
to be, but I cannot change my feelings. Please change the subject.'=20
Her eyes were bright with unshed tears and her voice threaten to=20
break.

When they reached the house, she dismissed him for the night and=20
locked herself in her room. Even Andy ignored him for evening, which=20
left Chakotay feeling dejected as he ate a cold supper and slept=20
little that night.

`Let's go. My ride will be here shortly.' A cold voice hissed at him=20
startling him fully awake. `Get the black cloaks out of the closest.'

Wiping the sleep out of his eyes, Chakotay pulled his clothes on and=20
grabbed the cloaks out of the closest. Stumbling into the kitchen, he=20
realized it was still nighttime as he came to stand beside the=20
dinning table, which held two opened leather bags. Tamara was piled=20
various items of clothing and personal items into them.

`There is a cup of tea for you on the counter.' Tamara said without=20
looking up. `Put the cloak on. It's warm.'

Gratefully, he slipped on one of the cloaks, sipped the tea and=20
started to get warm. Tamara picked up a pair of felt slippers and=20
handed them to him. He looked her curiously for all the slaves he=20
knew including himself went barefoot.

`We're going to the Royal Palace and standards are very high even for=20
the slaves. I'll explain the other policies while we're in the air.'=20
She closed the bags and slipped on the other cloak and he realized=20
that she was in full Healer Regalia. Fancy crap, she had called them.

There was a roar outside of the house as a hover car sat down gently=20
in the front lawn. They entered and made themselves comfortable in=20
the overstuffed seats. Tamara ignored the car while Chakotay looked=20
out the window and watched the scenery go by. When he looked back at=20
Tamara, he noticed she was gripping the arms of her chair and her=20
knuckles were white. Her eyes were closed and she was mouthing=20
something, but he couldn't make out what it was.

`Tamara, what's wrong?' His voice full of fear for her.

`I'm scared to death of flying, I hate it with a passion and if you=20
ever tell anyone, I'll don't know, but I'll think of something.' She=20
threatened and looked to see him laughing as he reached over and=20
hugged her.  To his surprise, she returned the hug. `Guess it's a=20
little childish to be afraid of flying.'

`No, it's a valid phobia even in the 24th century, Tamara.' He said=20
as she leaned against his chest, resting her head on his shoulder.=20
Keeping his arms around her, he kissed the top of her head and rested=20
his cheek on the top of her hair inhaling the scent of her.

All too soon, they landed in a side courtyard of the Palace designed=20
for the hovercraft. Carrying the bags, Chakotay followed Tamara=20
through the corridors of the vast castle losing his way after going=20
through a fourth corridor that looked exactly like the last two.=20
Halfway down the fourth one, did they stop in front a wooden ornate=20
door marked with the Healer's sigil.=20

`This is when we stay when in residence.' Tamara remarked as she=20
opened the door to her suite of room. The suite contained three=20
bedrooms, office, and private bath, dining area and receiving area=20
for visitors. She directed him where to unpack the bags and had him=20
join her on the couch.

`We didn't get a chance to talk on the air car about policy in the=20
palace, Chakotay.' She stopped when saw the anger on his face, and=20
felt his emotions churning under the surface, more slave stuff. Her=20
temper snapped he would just have to realize that that was the way=20
things were done here. Tamara reached over took his chin in her hand=20
and pulled his face close to her watching him wince at the pain she=20
was causing in his jaw.

`Listen to me and get off your fucking high horse, mister. Do you=20
want a chance to get off this rock or not? Just shake your head yes=20
or no.' her icy green eyes froze him. He shook his head yes.

`Now to do something like this is going to require planning, timing,=20
and money of which I have and you don't. Are you following this so=20
far?' He shook his head yes.

`You are on public records as a slave; hence you must play the part=20
until we find a way to free you legally. I need to have the control=20
release from the labor board to do that for your collar and bands.=20
Still following.'  He nodded yes.

`Can you make believe that is an undercover mission and you are the=20
operative who needs to get in touch with his contacts to get back to=20
home base of Voyager? Can you do that?' A nod yes.

`If you screw up here in the palace, there is no guarantee that I can=20
protect you if your behavior in public is less than perfect. You=20
could be sent to the mines as the worst case scenario and I don't=20
know if I could get you out. Now are you ready for this? I brought=20
you along because I wanted you to meet Kathryn and get to know her.'

`Yes, Healer.'

`Now for the hard task and I want to apologize in advance. There will=20
be times of verbal cruelty that you must bear. I will try and block=20
what I can. Keep your eyes downcast at all times. Obey instantly,=20
speak only when spoken too and don't hesitate to ask me anything in=20
private. All right, Chakotay?' She let go of his chin and to her=20
surprise, his eyes were dark with desire.

`Yes, Healer. I do have a question?' His breathing was erratic.

`What is it, Handsome?' She teased with a lock of hair on his head.

`Can we get together sometime as a couple? Dinner and dancing?'=20
Chakotay asked a little apprehensive.

`Are you asking as the slave or as the man I see under all this=20
fa=E7ade?' Tam felt herself melting under his intense gaze.
`Does it matter?' He grew bolder by pulling her into his arms.=20
Cupping her face gently with his right hand, he kissed her lightly on=20
the lips and she responded by kissing him back.

Her arms found their way up around his neck while her lips demanded=20
more from him. He groaned in arousal when she shifted to sit in his=20
lap. His hand found her breast through the fabric=85there was a knock=20
at the door and they jumped apart. Tam stood up instantly and=20
straighten her clothes.

`Can you get to the bedroom?' She noted his discomfort. `I will take=20
care of this.'

`Thanks.' He was grateful for the respite to compose himself as he=20
walked as fast as he could out of the room.

After regaining his senses, he came out of his bedroom with eyes=20
downcast, into the receiving area only to find she was gone. He tried=20
the door to the suite only to find it locked. Why would she go off=20
and not tell him? And when would she be back?

It gave him a chance to ponder over what she had said. Majority of it=20
was true; they would need each other to get off this planet. There=20
was no way she was going to let him lead a revolution if it would put=20
her daughter at risk. His control and patience had definitely been=20
off kilter lately with everything that had happened to him since his=20
enslavement. Maybe some meditation was in order to help him find some=20
answers.

A couple of hours later of meditation and Chakotay was feeling calmer=20
and in control for the first time in weeks. He stood and strutted=20
enjoying the relaxing of his muscles as he saw how much tension had=20
flowed out of him. A shower would feel good right now. Grabbing a few=20
things, he headed for the bath. With the door shut and the water=20
running he didn't hear the commotion in the outer room.=20

************
End of Part One


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************
Part Two
************
See Part One for disclaimer

Giloy, a close friend of Prince Deevick's, hauled Tamara into her 
suite tossing her to the floor and laughing as she curled up in pain. 
To ensure she got the point, he kicked her viciously in the ribs 
feeling them give and snap like twigs just past the point of his 
boots. A whimper escaped her lips and to his surprise, she started 
trying to get up as her anger fueled her desire for revenge.

"Fuck you, Giloy!" He didn't know the words, but
understood the 
contempt and loathing in her voice.

No one had ever spoken to him like that and he totally lost his 
temper. Raising his walking stick over his head, he proceeded to lash 
her about the face as a large broken welt appeared on her right 
forehead and went diagonally across her nose and left eye while the 
blood gushed blinding her. Screaming in pain and fear, Tamara dove 
for the floor in an attempt to hide.

Raising the cane for a second blow, a big bronze body dressed only in 
trousers came flying over the divan, which distracted Giloy for a 
moment. That instant was all Chakotay needed to gather Tamara in his 
arms and his use his board back to protect her from any further 
assault. To Giloy, it didn't matter how he got his satisfaction
from 
her arrogant ways. His walking stick lashed at Chakotay's
undefended 
back eight times before a hand clamped down on his shoulder and 
pulled him away.

"Giloy, by all that is sacred, what are you doing to our
healer?" 
Prince Deevick asked in his dangerous tone of voice.

Giloy froze. Deevick had never talked to him like that before and it 
boded ill for him.
"She was insolent to me. I was trying to teach her some manners
since 
you have no control over her." Giloy knew he was doomed and now
had 
nothing to lose. "How did you know she was injured, she never
called 
out?"

"Her implants. We are constantly watching her vitals. All the
alarms 
went off when the trauma started." Deevick signaled the guards to 
take Giloy away.

Chakotay glanced up through a haze of red pain at the Prince with 
tears in his eyes. Deevick grimaced at the damage to Boy Toy's
back. 
There were eight deep cuts and bleeding profusely.

"Can you get up so we can tend to the Healer?" Deevick asked
softly 
reading the mistrust in the slave's dark eyes. He was in full 
protectiveness of his mistress mode. "Despite our contempt for
each 
other, I do care about her. She is the mother of my beloved
daughter."

Chakotay relaxed a bit and crawled away from Tamara's inert body
and 
nearly cried out when he saw the ruins of her lovely face. The Royal 
Physician bent over her and shook his head in anger when he analyzed 
the extent of the damage. He motioned for his assistants to bring in 
the stretchers for the injured people. Intent on being with Tamara, 
Chakotay caught hold of her hand, but kept his eyes downcast. Deevick 
smiled when he saw the gesture of protectiveness. That was good for 
the Healer's benefit to have a bodyguard.

"Did you wish to speak, Boy Toy?" Deevick asked the injured
man.

"May I stay with Healer Tamara, please, your highness?"
Chakotay 
swallowed his pride and begged, while trying to ignore the pain 
radiated from his back.

"Yes, you may."

Both men were glad that Tamara was unconscious as she was lifted onto 
the medical bed in the palace infirmary. Chakotay was gently placed 
on his stomach on the next bed and given painkillers while a medical 
assistant tended to his back. Deevick was standing next to Chakotay 
and they watched as they physicians worked on her.

"Three fractured ribs, left lung punctured, bruised heart muscle
and 
we'll work on the eye and face later. Let's get the internal
injuries 
at the moment." The medical team discussed her medical condition
in 
front of the men.

Deevick was still standing there when Chakotay awoke in the evening 
from the sedative they had given him. The painkillers were wearing 
off and his back throbbed in dull waves. He grunted as he shifted on 
the bed trying to get comfortable.
"I see you're awake, Boy Toy. Care to answer a few
questions?" 
Deevick asked as he fastened his eyes on the human male.

"Yes, sir." Chakotay responded while looking at Tamara lying
still on 
the next bed with a heavy bandage over her eyes. Someone had tied her 
red hair back and she looked like a little girl so innocent and 
venerable.

"How was Giloy able to do so much injury to Tamara before you 
intervened?" Deevick asked glaring at him. It had shaken him to
find 
out how much the Healer actually meant to him only when she had come 
this close to death.

"I was getting out of the shower and didn't hear anything
until I 
opened the door and she was screaming. I protected her as best I 
could till you stopped him, Prince." Chakotay dared to glance up 
quickly before looking back at the floor again.

"You mean you were doing things without permission. The
slaves' bath 
is in the back of the palace, not the personal bath if you're an 
owner." Irritated, Deevick grabbed Chakotay by the hair and
yanked 
his head back at a painful angle, putting his face right next to the 
slave's startled face. "If she is damaged permanently, what
you got 
from Giloy today will seem like a treat when I get done with you."

His chest was heaving for air, Chakotay was one breath away from 
total panic and losing it but Tamara's earlier words calmed him
and 
he fought the panic back under control. "Yes, sir."

"Father, what happened to Mommy?" a little five year old red
head 
asked as she rushed up to the men. Deevick released Chakotay and 
picked up his daughter.

"Mommy was hurt, but the physicians are helping her. She's
sleeping 
right now, dear one." Deevick explained.

"Wanna help mommy, Father." She squirmed in his arms and he
almost 
dropped her.

"Just by being here and keeping Mommy company will help,
baby."

"No, like Mommy does when someone is hurt. I put my hands on her
face 
and make her better like this." Kathryn reached over and touched
her 
mother's face. Deevick could feel the healing power emanating
from 
his daughter's body.

It wasn't much, but it was enough to heal Tamara somewhat and to
wake 
her up feeling nothing but the pain wash over her. The pain 
distracted her from using her own healing power to finish the healing 
process. She thrashed on the bed for a few moments and finally went 
back to sleep. Kathryn started to cry and Deevick took her from the 
infirmary and back to their rooms.

************
Prince Deevick only took a moment to think over the doctor's 
suggestion and agreed to it. The doctor was all ready in his lab and 
all he needed now was the lab rat. One boy toy that belonged to the 
Royal Healer and since the Healer was incapacitated for the moment; 
it was up to the Prince to oversee her property and the maintenance 
of said property. 

Chakotay looked up as Deevick and the doctor entered the infirmary 
from the side of Healer Tamara's bed where he had been standing
all 
morning. Quickly, he dropped his eyes, but not before Deevick caught 
the flash of anger and hatred in them. This slave had a streak of 
stubbornness and pride in him that the Prince did not like. Something 
he intended to remedy this very day since he had made Chakotay the 
promise of retaliation for his failure to keep the Healer undamaged 
and safe. Tamara's face was scarred and it detracted from her
beauty, 
which Deevick could not forgive from the slave.

"All right, Boy Toy. Come with me while they work on the
Healer." 
Deevick commanded quietly. With audacity, Chakotay kissed Tamara on 
the mouth as he turned to leave with the Prince. She was deeply 
sedated, but felt the kiss from him shake her to the core.

Two orderlies came and started to prepare Healer Tamara for further 
surgery on the repair of her left eye. However, even the cosmetic 
surgery on this planet could only do so much and the long diagonal 
scar would remain.

There was something about this calm and stoic man that got on 
Deevick's nerves. He led Chakotay into a very sophisticated
science 
laboratory that rivaled any of the science labs on Voyager. Chakotay 
was impressed until he saw the four guards file in and line up behind 
him as a stab of fear ran through him realizing this was a trap and 
Tamara would not be able to save him. Boldly, he looked Deevick in 
the face with fury in his dark eyes.

"We need your seed to help with our breeding program, Boy Toy.
And 
you are a fine example of a humanoid; you have been chosen for the 
honor of helping to sire the next generation. So you can do this the 
easy way or the hard way." Deevick laughed as he watched Chakotay 
turn to try and escape from the lab. He waved for the guards to grab 
the burly man.

The guards grabbed Chakotay two to each arm as a lab assistant came 
forward and injected a shot into his groin area. Chakotay yelped with 
the pain of the shot. He tried to twist around, but the guards were 
too strong for him.

"Put him on the table there," the assistant pointed.

A wave of dizziness swept over Chakotay causing his legs to buckle 
and the guards picked him up and dropped him on the table. His head 
was spinning so badly he had to close his eyes, but he felt his 
clothes being removed and his limbs being strapped down. There was a 
slow burning of lust beginning to build in his groin. A blindfold was 
slipped over his eyes and a pair of hands slipped between his thighs 
causing him to gasp as a wave of pleasure rolled over him. He arched 
upward seeking a source of release from the torment beginning to 
build in him. He fought for control of his body while the hands found 
his penis and began to massage it to full growth. Shame and disgust 
filled him as he responded to the touching with a raging hard-on and 
the desire for release.

"Well, that didn't take very long, my prince. He responded
very well 
to the stimulant." Doctor Eri said walking into the lab and
observing 
the Prince playing with Chakotay's erection and balls. The slave
was 
thrashing helplessly and mindlessly against his bounds and moaning in 
despair for release from the torment.

The fight had gone out of him and he could only thrash helplessly 
hoping someone would ease his need for release. With the pounding of 
his heart and the roar of blood in his ears, Chakotay could only make 
out bits and pieces of the conversation around him.

"It's not going to take very much to send him over the edge,
Doc. Do 
you have the sample jar to catch his seed? I wouldn't want to
waste 
any of it." Deevick said as he lightly rubbed the bronze cock and 
laughed at the pleas coming from Chakotay's full lips. Deevick
was 
tempted to fuck the beautiful body, but knew that either one of them, 
Tamara or Chakotay would kill him; despite the fact he was the crown 
prince. While the lab assistant held the sample catch, Deevick gave 
the engorged penis a vigorous massage giving Chakotay a screaming 
organism as he came and came until he passed out from the intensity 
of it.

Chakotay awoke back in the infirmary clear headed, filled with 
humiliation and shame, but with another erection that demanded some 
attention as the fabric of his trousers rubbed against the silken 
skin. A groan from the next bed caught his attention.

Tamara was waking up or so she thought, but her eyes were covered and 
her left eye was throbbing with a fiery pain. Her hands reached up to 
find the heavy bandages covering her eyes.

"Chakotay?" Tam was starting to panic as her memory began to
return 
of the attack. He didn't answer right away and the edge of her
voice 
became slightly hysterical. "Chakotay?"

"I'm here, Tam." He said as he slipped off the bed and
stood next to 
her. He caught both of her creamy hands in his dark hands and felt 
her calm down a bit.
"Will I see again, Handsome?" Tam asked with some panic and
fear in 
her voice.

"I don't know, Tam." His voice sounded false to him as
tears ran down 
his face again over the guilt at his failure to protect her.

"Chakotay, what happened?" Tamara demanded sensing his
distress 
through his hands shaking.

"Nothing. I'm fine," he muttered just wanting to forget
about it and 
go take a shower. He felt dirty and used.  Letting go of her hands, 
he went back to his own bed not wanting anyone's help.

Growing furious, Tamara called on her own healing powers to her eyes 
and face feeling the cool power wash over her. She could see bits of 
light coming under the bandages and pulled them off blinking 
furiously as the bright light stung her eyes. Adjusting to the light, 
she looked over and saw Chakotay sitting like a lump on his 
bed. "Tell me."

"Great spirits, no." Chakotay blurted out as he looked up and
saw the 
diagonal scar running across her right forehead, across her nose and 
down her left eye and cheek.

Her green eyes met the horror in his dark eyes and her self esteem 
shattered. `Oh, gods! I must look like a monster to him.'
Throwing 
the sheet over her head, she curled up sobbing quietly. 

It took a full moment of the impact of his words and actions to 
register on his brain. The scar across her lovely face had taken him 
by surprise and his careless remark had hurt her deeply. He needed to 
apologize for his carelessness.

"Tam, please forgive me. I should never have said that. Talk to
me, 
please." He was begging and it only caused her to kick at him
driving 
him back and her crying to become harder. Tears sprang to his eyes as 
he slid to the floor helpless in his guilt and shame.

"Why is Mommy crying, Father?" Kathryn's voice came from
behind 
Chakotay.

"I don't know, but I intend to find out. Isn't that
right, Boy Toy?" 
Deevick's snake like voice sounded in his ear sending a cold
chill 
down the big bronze man's spine.

"Yes, sir."

"Father, Mommy needs to go home to finish healing. Send her home 
now." Kathryn said simply as a command.
"As you wish, my dear." Deevick responded. "Boy Toy, pack
her bags 
and bring the cloaks now."

Chakotay stood up, said, "Yes, sir." And fled from the
infirmary.
  
Deevick's car dropped Chakotay, Tamara and their baggage off just 
outside the house on the front lawn. Chakotay left the baggage on the 
lawn as he carried the sedated Tamara into the house. The hood of her 
cloak was pulled tight over her head and face because she
wouldn't 
let anyone see her scarred face including Chakotay. He took her 
upstairs and laid her out on the bed leaving her alone. Going outside 
for the bags, he felt Andy brush by him on his way to his mistress.

She woke up when Andy jumped on the bed and wiggled his excitement by 
lying on top of her. Andy snuffled at the hood covering her face, but 
she pushed him away while she loosened the hood and let her hands 
fell the deep ridge of the scar. A fresh set of tears ran down her 
face and turning towards the wall, she indulged in another bout of 
self-pity.

Chakotay stood in the doorway listening and watching helplessly as 
Tamara cried some more. He would like to go in and snap her out of it 
but the furball's growl kept him in the doorway. He talked and 
shouted at her, but she refused to even acknowledge his presence.

On the third morning of their return home, Chakotay awoke to find 
Tamara standing in the doorway to his room. She flinched a little 
when he stared at her scarred face, but otherwise was acting normal 
again. There was no head covering, no veil; she was not hiding from 
the world. He wondered what had brought her around of her self-pity.

"Come on, Chakotay. Let's get going." Tamara said
cheerfully. "Or may 
I help you?"

"What kind of help are you offering?" He smiled as he pushed
his 
blankets off and got up from the bed naked. His bronze body took her 
breath away for a moment.

"Very nice, handsome," Tamara quipped as she felt some
serious 
arousal in her center, but she kept her composure. She just stood in 
the doorway and admired the scenery as he reached for his 
trousers. "It's very tempting to have you stay naked all day
so I can 
admire the assets."

"You wouldn't," he squeaked at the idea.

"It's an idea I would like to think about," Tamara said
itching to 
run her hands all over his body especially that gorgeous ass. She 
made herself stick to her promise that she would not take him unless 
he came to her. Turning, she headed for the kitchen and breakfast of 
bread, fruit and heartleaf tea.

Chakotay appeared fully clothed and helped himself to some breakfast 
and tea. "What's with the mood charge all of a sudden?"
He tore a 
roll in half.

"I've had my pity party and now it's time to get up and
get going. 
Life's too short to worry about a new scar," she nibbled on a
piece 
of fruit. The scar was red and angry looking over her 
forehead. "Let's get to the office, handsome."
	
************
They fell into routine of working at the clinic and with the 
children. Chakotay's reputation as a storyteller grew and Tamara 
watched from the sidelines at how good he was with the children and 
patiently answered their questions. Days turned into weeks and 
Chakotay found himself thinking less of Voyager and her Captain.

He watched Tamara as she helped the children with their injuries and 
kissed their tears away. He stood in the background and saw her power 
bring life into the world and heal the mothers. When a baby was 
stillborn, he held her while she cried. Some days, he carried her 
home because she had overused her energy and her body simply shut 
down to refresh itself in sleep.

The time for her monthly trip to the palace came she left him behind 
with Andy as company. It was a quiet time and he enjoyed the few days 
of freedom, but he was even happier when she returned from her visit 
with Kathryn. They soon settled into routine again.

***********
Week Eight

Tuvok was made First Officer and kept his Tactical Officer job as 
well while Greg Ayala was made Lt. in charge of Security. Tom Paris 
was made Beta Shift Leader but kept his position as Chief Helmsman 
while Harry Kim was put on as Gamma Shift Leader and more junior 
officers were brought onto the bridge for training under Tuvok.

The loss of Chakotay was felt deeply throughout the ship and morale 
was down despite Neelix's best efforts. Despite his love for 
B'Elanna, Tom was more subdued these days as he realized how
deeply 
he felt for the Maquis Captain. He gave his full attention to 
B'Elanna and loved her as much as he could.

B'Elanna broke down and cried while she helped Kathryn pack up 
Chakotay's things for storage in the bowels of the ship.
	
************
At the end of the fifth month since his capture, Tamara was again 
getting ready for her monthly trip to the palace to see Kathryn. She 
was also taking Andy for his annual checkup with the genetic 
scientists. Chakotay was fussing in the kitchen in a snit because she 
refused to take him along. She didn't want a repeat of the last
time 
he was at the palace.

"Please, Tam. Let me come with you." He was nearly begging.
His sixth 
sense was going off. "This doesn't feel right."

"No, Chakotay. If you feel that bad about staying here alone, go
stay 
up in the clinic. Gotta go," she said over the roar of the
landing 
hover car. Kissing him bye, she whistled for Andy and entered the 
car, which took off as soon as the hatch closed.

Chakotay watched in dread as the car disappeared into the eastern sky 
and he headed into the house to get a bag packed. Tamara's idea
of 
going to the clinic sounded good to him, he could use her computer 
terminal in some more research.

"Hello, Boy Toy," Prince Deevick said who was seated at the
kitchen 
table drinking some tea.

Chakotay turned to run but the Prince had six of his best guards as 
they surrounded him. He surrendered without a fight. A cold knot 
formed in his gut as he was turned to face the prince and kneeled in 
front of his black shinning boots.

"I informed you of what would happen if the Healer was
permanently 
damaged because of your failure to protect her," Deevick said
coldly.

Chakotay kept his eyes down and the guilt rolled over him, "Yes, 
Prince."

An additional guard appeared in the doorway. "Sire, the Healer is
at 
the Palace and the perimeter is secure. You may proceed without
risk."

"Thank you, Hedley." The prince stood up and straightened his
dark 
jacket. "Strip him, boys and secure him to the beam here."

His forearms were secured to the beam in the ceiling while his ankles 
were secured to the floor and his golden skin gleaned with sweat and 
fear. Leaning his head against his right arm, Chakotay watched as 
Deevick approached him. Deevick lifted Chakotay's face and kissed
him 
full on the mouth and used his other hand to grab his ass. Chakotay 
recoiled in horror at the invasion, but he couldn't get away.
There 
was another pair of hands starting to stroke his genitalia while a 
third pair began to massage his back. He began to jerk and buck in 
terror against the invasion of his body. Between Deevick and the 
guard behind him, they slipped a gag into his mouth and fastened it 
with straps behind his head. Next, a blindfold was slipped over his 
eyes.

"First, we paddle that beautiful ass to warm it up. Thank
twenty-five 
lashes for his punishment and for the rest of it, we'll play as
we go 
along, boys." Laughed Deevick as she backed away and sat down at
the 
kitchen table to watch.

Horrified, Chakotay could only moan helplessly as the first blow was 
struck.

************
End of Part Two
************


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************
Part Three
************
See Part One for disclaimer

Even now months later after Chakotay's disappearance, Thomas
Paris 
found himself looking for the big guy sitting in chair on bridge, 
having a beer at Sandrine's or having a meal with the Captain in
the 
Mess Hall. He missed the feeling of Chakotay being behind him with 
his steady presence while he flew at the helm.
Tom spent many a sleepless night wondering what had happened to the 
Commander. Was he all right and was he even still alive? Somehow, it 
had to be his fault if he analyzed it right. Something he missed 
during the investigation? He realized that the steady calm, cool and 
centered First Officer had kept him grounded and had kept a little 
bit of peace in his life on Voyager. Not any longer.
"Face it, Tommy Boy. He's gone, so get over it. Besides you
have 
B'Elanna, Harry and even Tuvok is almost nice to you these
days."  A 
set of dark eyes would always haunt his dreams.
Tears fell from the bright blue eyes as he let the grief out and kept 
his thoughts about the Maquis in his heart to himself. Life with 
B'Elanna was starting to be real good while his friendship with
Harry 
grew deeper.

************
`Pain. Nothing but the pain. Oh the lovely darkness. No pain
there. 
Help me, Kathryn! A scream of pain. Who is screaming?'

"Mommy, help me! It hurts."

"Okay, baby. Let me make the pain go away." Soft hands
brushed his 
hair back and wiped his eyes.
"So scared." Fresh tears falling. His eyes hurt couldn't
see.

"Hush, baby. I'm right here. Nobody's going to hurt
you."

Arms went around him and hugged him. A feeling of comfort and safety 
swept over him. His sobs quieted down to sniffles. Soft words 
whispered in his ear. There was a light tap to his forehead and he 
fell into a deep dreamless sleep.

Help came from the village as Chakotay was transported to the clinic 
for care. Once he was cleaned up, Tamara healed the body leaving no 
sign of the physical trauma. She left him in the care of the medical 
staff under heavy sedation while she left the village for a quick 
trip to the Royal Palace.

************
"Hello, Deevick."

Prince Deevick startled from his sleep looked up to find someone 
sitting on his legs and a large serrated blade at his throat. A hand 
ripped his shirt from collar to belly. He flinched and the edge of 
the blade nicked his neck and he felt a warm gush of blood running 
down his skin.

"Careful, Deevick, my hand may slip ever further and Rashela will
be 
minus a crown prince." A cold voice told him.

"Tamara!" he exclaimed. For the first time in his life, the
Crown 
Prince was deathly afraid.

"That's right, Prince of scum. Let's call it a little
revenge for 
hurting an innocent man. You had no right to damage my property."
She 
said. He shifted. "Freeze, Deevick. I could kill you right now
and I 
wouldn't think twice about it or lose any sleep over it."

"Why would you care about a slave?" Deevick was scornful.

"Because he's mine and I'm responsible for his welfare
and safety. 
Plus he makes me happy, you bastard." She spat in his face.
"Time for 
restitution on my damaged property."

She tapped him on the forehead, "Sleep, asshole."

There was revenge in his eyes as they closed in sleep. When he was 
awakened a short time later, he was bound and gagged to the frame of 
his bed and minus his clothes. Tamara was standing over him with the 
serrated knife in her hand and a sneer on her face.

"Shall I make you a eunuch, Deevick?" Tamara laughed. He
frantically 
shook his head no, his eyes wide with fear, pulling against his 
restraints. Running her hands up his legs, she smiled as he responded 
with a hard on in spite of the danger to himself.

Tamara raised the knife and plunged it into his groin. Deevick 
screamed into his gag at the red-hot pain and promptly passed out.  
She yanked the knife tearing flesh with the serrated edge, ignoring 
the blood and pressed her hands over the wound calling on her healing 
power to close the wound, but leaving him a nice reminder.

When the prince came too, he was alive and whole on clean sheets and 
in fresh nightclothes. Calling up a light, he dropped his pants and 
examined his groin area. There was no sign of injury, but there was a 
new three-inch scar not five inches from his genitals. When he moved, 
there was a slight twinge of pain.

A footstep made him turn in terror. Tamara was standing in front of 
him with her face full of rage and insanity. "If you ever harm
him 
again or even think about it, I'll kill you." And with that
she was 
gone.

************
Sarina was waiting for her when she got back to the village. Tamara 
handed her aide a bag and asked her to destroy what was inside and 
Sarina did that without asking why. Tamara hurried to Chakotay's 
side. He was still under heavy sedation and she sat by his side 
holding his hand and thinking.

"How are we going to help him, Sarina?" Tamara asked. "I
have no 
experience in matters. This is a proud man like an oak tree and this 
kind of attack could destroy him."

"What does make you with your similar experiences, Healer?"
Sarina 
remarked and heard her snort.

"I am a survivor like the willow tree who bends with wind and
will 
last out the storm. This one is proud, stiff necked and will prefer 
to forget about it. He is like the oak tree proud and strong and more 
likely to break in a fierce storm than the willow who bows to the 
storm." She fiddled with her hair in worry. "But what is the
best way 
to help him considering the circumstances?"

"The Royal Telepaths would replace the memory. You could do the
same, 
Healer. Just let him remember the lashing, the beating and replace 
the assault part into part of the beating." Sarina offered with
hope 
in her voice.

Tamara thought it over. "I'll do it after I've had a nap.
I'll need 
my full strength for something like that."
	
Do you want him awake for this, Healer?" Doctor Bek asked as they 
entered the private room where Chakotay had been kept since the 
attack. "We need to get him off of the sedation as soon as
possible."

"No, let him sleep. When he awakens, I want to be able to assess
the 
memory. If it is still strong, I may have to go in again." Tamara
sat 
on the edge of the bed. "Help me sit him up so I can get his head
and 
shoulders in my lap."

"Yes, Healer," Doctor Bek held Chakotay upright while Tamara
climbed 
on the bed, arranged the pillows behind her back on the headboard and 
than settled his head and shoulders on her lap. "Is there
anything I 
can do?"

"I don't know how long this will take, so if you could check
on us 
every so often," Tamara smiled as she ran her fingers through his 
silky hair. 

"Yes, Healer." Doctor Bek left the room.

This was going to be a tough call as she eased into his mind. Time to 
start at the beginning of the memory right after she had left for the 
palace. She stepped back into the background of his memory and let 
the events unfold as Chakotay had seen them happen.

He went into the house so he could get a few things to take with him 
to the clinic. Deevick was waiting for him in the kitchen. She 
listened to the conversation and felt his panic while his arms were 
fastened to the kitchen beams and his ankles to the rungs in the 
floor. His clothes were cut off leaving him naked and humiliated.

The guards paddled his behind for a long time till it was raw and 
bleeding. Deevick had blindfolded and gagged the helpless bronze man 
and Tamara could only feel what was in the memory as it happened. A 
stinging lash to Chakotay's back had him cry out against the gag.
She 
could feel his hot tears of shame building along with the guilt he 
felt for not protecting her behind the blindfold. The lashing went on 
for a long time.

He was barely aware when hands parted his raw cheeks and he felt the 
start of a cock penetrating his burning ass. The thrusting created a 
new pain and he felt a part of his soul begin to die from the shame 
and humiliation. Screaming against the gag, he felt his attacker come 
in his bowels and screamed anew when he felt the next attacker 
ripping his tender skin.

Bringing her will into his, she froze the memory and began to reshape 
it as blur of more lashings on his back. Carefully, she sorted his 
feelings and emotions for the memory engrams and brutally ripped it 
from him replacing it with a blur of the lashing and beatings. This 
he could recover from.
Tamara lovingly refocused his brain into accepting the assault as a 
punishment inflicted on him by the Crown Prince. All traces of the 
rape as far as she could tell were gone. There was a tension flowing 
out of him and he was relaxing into a more natural sleep. She crooned 
nameless tunes in his mind as she drifted around double checking her 
work and going over the memory again.

He was waking up and she drifted along with him as he opened his 
beautiful eyes and looked up at her.

"Hi, Handsome. How do you feel?" Tears were running down her
face 
from her pent up emotions. 

"I feel pretty good being here with you." He smiled showing
his 
dimples. "Why the tears?" He could feel the gentle love
flowing from 
her and cooling wash of her healing power.

"It's been a rough couple of days. We had to keep you under
heavy 
sedation while the healings were going on and the strain is catching 
up to me plus relief that you are going to be all right." She 
admitted as she caressed his face and gently slipped out of his mind.

"How is he, Healer?" Sarina asked from the doorway.

"He'll be fine, Sarina. How many appointments for today?"
Tamara 
asked.

"Only five, Healer. Oddly, there was a bit of news on Prince
Deevick. 
There's a rumor that he was attacked in his room at the
Palace," 
Sarina grinned. "Odd how rumors get started, isn't it?"

"Yes, very odd indeed," Tamara smiled. "Chakotay, sit up.
I need to 
get to work."

"You need to rest, Healer." He protested.

"I'll get enough rest when I'm dead, Handsome," she
slapped his 
shoulder. "Now get up."

"Do you promise to rest right after the appointments,
Healer?" 
Chakotay nagged.

She glared at him, but he looked at her so earnestly, she gave 
in. "Yes, I'll rest afterwards. I'm going to turn you
over my knee 
one of these days for your insolence."

Chakotay sat up gingerly; the new skin on his back pulled in protest 
and flashes of the pain made him cringe. Tamara placed a hand on his 
upper back and he flinched. He whimpered, "Please. No more."
"Chakotay. It's over. You're safe." Tamara whispered
in his ear. "I 
won't let them hurt you, baby."

"I'm sorry, Tam." Chakotay faced her as she was getting
up off the 
bed with tears falling from his beautiful dark eyes.

"You have nothing to be sorry for." She leaned over and
kissed him 
fully on those lovely full lips. "None of this was your fault 
whatsoever. You didn't ask to be placed in this situation."

He responded by kissing her back and with a groan, she pulled away 
very reluctantly. "I could spend all day doing that,
Chakotay." Her 
voice was husky with desire and felt her face turning red with heat 
of excitement.

"Why don't you?" He answered back with his voice also
full of desire.

"Because legally I own you and I have the legal right, but I
won't 
because to me it's tantamount to assault. However, I leave the
choice 
of free will of the matter in your hands. As much as I want to take 
advantage of you, I won't," Tamara said as she stood up by
sheer 
force of will.

His respect and admiration for her rose to a new level as he lay back 
down exhausted and fell into a natural sleep.

Chakotay awoke to a kiss on his forehead from Tamara as she sat on 
the edge of the back. "How do you feel?"

"Better now that you're here. Why?" He asked fearfully.

"Healer, you contact is calling regarding the Voyager
calculations," 
Sarina said as she came into the room with fresh clothing for 
Chakotay.

"I'll be right back, baby." Tamara said to him.

"No, I want to come. I have to know." Chakotay threw the
covers back 
and attempted to stand. Tamara got his elbow to steady him as they 
went down the hallway to her office.

The contact was the Royal Bookkeeper, a good friend and confidant of 
the Healer. He was waiting patiently when they arrived.

"Hello. What news of the calculations do you have?" Tamara
greeted 
her friend.

He looked at Chakotay's tired and haggard face. "Is he the
one, 
Healer, the Boy Toy you are going to all the trouble for?" 
"His name is Chakotay." Tamara exploded in a fit of temper.
Even 
Chakotay and Sarina flinched at the venom in her voice.

"My apologies, Healer." The bookkeeper apologized.

"The calculations, please." She asked in a calm voice.

"From the information we were able to obtain. Chakotay was
brought in 
on the slave ship `Morning Mist' and the planet Samelon he
was taken 
from in relation to Rashela plus the Mist uses the trans warp conduit 
with Voyager traveling roughly at warp 6 constantly puts her roughly 
3,113 light years away give or take a few light years. The main thing 
is what course is Voyager using to keep heading for the Alpha 
Quadrant." He paused pulling the charts up everyone could see
what he 
meant. The green line showed the route of the Mist and the blue 
showed possible routes for Voyager to travel.

"I'm ahead of Voyager, but way out in right field."
Chakotay sounded 
depressed.

"That was the projections for the day you arrived, Chakotay.
Pending 
problems Voyager should only be roughly 2700 light years away."
He 
offered.

"Can we send a message to that area and see if Voyager picks it
up?" 
Tamara asked squeezing Chakotay's shoulder in comfort and hope
for 
rescue. 

"Let me talk to some people and I'll get back to you in a few
days." 
The bookkeeper said his mind working on whom he could talk to about 
this. "It may cost some money for a transaction like this."

"Fine. Whatever the cost, my friend. Keep us informed. Healer
Tamara 
out." She cut the link and turned her attention to Chakotay.
"Hey, 
baby. Ready to go home?"

"Yeah, sure, Tam," he agreed barely hearing her question.
"Two 
thousand seven light years, it might as well be thirty thousand as he 
sank into a pit of despair.

Tamara and Chakotay went back to the house.

"Sarina, something is wrong with Chakotay." Tamara was full
of 
worry. "He hasn't been out of bed all week."

"How is his health?" Sarina appeared nonchalant about her
concern for 
the Healer's slave.

"Healthy, just tired and drained like his energy is gone. I knew
he 
needed a couple of days to recuperate, but this is starting to drag 
on," Tamara was frowning in puzzlement.
They were sitting in the Healer's office at the clinic where they
had 
just finished a two-day session filled with births and injuries. 
Exhausted, they had cups of heartleaf tea in front of them trying to 
get the strength to go home. Sarina had filled in for Chakotay as 
Tamara's helper during the session.

"Not going home yet, ladies?" Doctor Bek stuck his head in
the 
door. "Healer, you look ready to fall over. What's wrong?"

"Chakotay," Tamara answered. "Can you come up and take a
look at him?"

"Sure. I don't have any appointments at the moment." He
smiled.

"Depression and guilt. He needs psychiatric help, Tamara. But he 
won't get it here on Rashela," Bek said when he allowed into 
Chakotay's room.

"Why not?" She sounded forlorn.

"Slaves in his condition for humane reasons are put down.
It's 
painless and it will solve your worry. I can do it for you, if you 
want me to."

"No. I'll figure it out myself."
	
No air!	 

No air! 

Icy cold water! 

Can't breathe! 

His head was underwater and his lungs were starving for air. His neck 
and shoulder muscles jerked in reflex. Can't move. Something was 
holding him under the cold water and his body was starting to get 
numb from the cold.

"I WANT TO LIVE!" Survival instincts kicked in and Chakotay
came up 
from the tub of ice water with a roar of outrage inhaling a huge 
lungful of air.

He teetered on the brink of insanity. A soft voice spoke trying to 
catch his attention.

"Chakotay."

He swayed back and forth while water ran down his face and body.

"He's not listening," Bek said as he pulled a syringe
from his bag.
"I'm going in. If it's gentle enough, he won't feel
it, but it's 
pretty messy in there." Tamara said. "If you do anything to
him, 
you'll get the same treatment."

Bek flinched at the coldness in her voice. "Yes, Healer."
	
Tamara heard a wolf howling in dismay as she entered his mind. Where 
did that come from, she wondered as she tried to make sense of the 
chaos? Just go with the flow.

The guilt hit her in the gut flooring her.

Guilt for not staying by her side as he had promised.

Guilt for not being able to protect her as he had promised.

Guilt for not always following the ways of his people.

Guilt for not dying when his people were killed.

The hurt for each time she pushed him away.

Depression for all his failures.

Worst of all, he would more than likely never see Voyager or Kathryn 
again.

This list could go on for days, Tamara thought as she drifted along 
the eddies of his mind. If she had had any idea he was in this much 
pain. No time for could've, would've or should've's.
He must have had 
successes in his life. There was always honor, pride and a quiet 
dignity about him until the attack on him. Chakotay now felt no hope 
to get back to Voyager.

Off in the distance, amidst the sea of chaos, there was a tiny space 
of calm and sanity.

"Chakotay."

"Tam, help me," came his cry. "Make the pain go away."

"Sorry, baby. Can't make it go away, but we can share the
pain and 
ease it. Will you share with me, Chakotay?" She held out her hand
to 
him and waited.

"Do you want to live, Chakotay? I'm not Kathryn, but I too
wish for a 
mate and children. I wouldn't push you away, baby." Tamara
said 
knowing he wouldn't even remember this conversation. "Let me
help 
you, Chakotay. You have to decide now. Your mind is ready to snap and 
if you go over the edge, I can't help you and the doctor will put
you 
down."
He hesitated.

"I have to go now, Chakotay." She said her hand still
outstretched.

Still he hesitated.

Tamara turned to go as the roar of his chaos grew louder and the 
edges of the calm began to dissolve. Tears began to form on her 
mental face when she felt a warm golden presence tap her on the 
shoulder.

"Please, Tam. Wait for me." His sweet melodic voice filled
her. "I do 
want to live."

She caught sight of a wolf grinning at her for a split second as she 
started pulled out of the mind link.

Back in the bedroom, her lips found his and together they entwined 
arms, legs and bodies meshing as one. Doctor Bek discreetly left the 
room.

"Chakotay?" Tears were in green eyes shining with love.

His eyes opened. They were dark, calm and clear.

"Tam?" He questioned as he felt her in his mind sharing,
healing, 
soothing raw emotion and dulling the pain.

"Yeah, baby," she smiled with relief.

"Can we do that again?"

"Sure, baby. Come here and put those lips to work."

************
End of Part Three
************


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************
Part Four
************
See Part One for disclaimer

Chakotay got better and was able to help Tamara at the clinic and=20
play storyteller for the children.  He didn't remember much from that=20
night in question except for the Healer being there to helping to=20
ease his guilt, pain and depression. In the morning when he had=20
awakened, she had been in his arms and he felt sated sexually for the=20
first time in a long while.

Days passed and they fell in routine again. With her dreams haunting=20
her, she did not go to him at night as her promise to herself. To=20
distract herself, she dove into her work and their escape plans to=20
make her body so tired that she would fall asleep as soon as she hit=20
the mattress. Even than the bronze man invaded her dreams.

His dreams of loving the healer were becoming more erotic as the days=20
passed. There was a hunger of desire in his dark eyes as he watched=20
her during the day, especially when she was with the children. A=20
couple of times, when the Healer overworked herself, Chakotay had to=20
carry her home while sporting an erection. Several times, he had=20
crept up the stairs intent on making her his and his nerve would fail.

Each time Tamara had heard him and waited, she would than sigh in=20
disappointment when he crept back down to his room. Finally, enough=20
was enough and it was time for her to do something about the=20
situation before he drove her crazy. Sarina answered her early=20
morning call and smiled when the Healer told her about her plan to=20
take the day off to work on Chakotay.

"Fill me in on the details, Healer," Sarina snickered as she cut the=20
link.

She decided to get started that very morning by wearing a skimpy top=20
and a short skirt at the breakfast table. Nibbling on fruit and a=20
roll, Tamara didn't have to wait very long for Chakotay to come out=20
of his room. Hearing her up and in her office so early, he had become=20
curious.

"Good morning, handsome," Tamara said sweetly as she nibbled on a=20
yuplat which look like an earth carrot but was a sweet fruit on=20
Rashela.

Chakotay froze when he saw how little she had on and the provocative=20
way her body sat at the table. He felt his groin tighten and his=20
heartbeat pounding in his ears as she stood up and sauntered over to=20
him.

"Spirits, help me!" He breathed harshly willing himself under control=20
as she stopped directly in front of him and gazed at him with those=20
emerald eyes and long black lashes with the red hair spilling down=20
her back.

Gently reaching her hands up, she pulled his face down and her hungry=20
lips pressed against his full ones. Reason left him when he felt pure=20
pleasure in the kiss and he responded by pulling her into his arms=20
melting their bodies together. Her lips parted and her tongue teased=20
his lips into opening so she could explore his mouth and tongue=20
eliciting a groan from deep in his chest.

Her hands dropped down and began to play with chest through the thin=20
shirt teasing his nipples while her hips rubbed against his groin=20
feeling how hard he was. A few moments of play and Tamara wrenched=20
herself away from him breathing hard and dizzy with desire wondering=20
if she had gone to far. She had promised herself not to go to his=20
bed, but she had never promised herself not to tease or flirt with=20
Chakotay. Closing her eyes, she tried to get herself calm and the=20
implants in her brain accomplished the task for her. A moment passed.

Feeling more composed; Tamara opened her eyes and found Chakotay=20
kneeling in front of her with his eyes downcast. Using the index=20
finger of her right hand, she reached down and tipped his head up to=20
face her. His passion filled eyes burned her gaze as her thumb=20
caressed his bottom full lip.

"What is it, Chakotay?" Tamara asked wanting to ravish him, yet held=20
herself in check.

"I wish to make love with you, Healer. I desire to be in the same bed=20
with you." His melodic voice jolted her senses.

"Let's go, Handsome," she extended her hand in an invitation. Taking=20
her hand in his, Chakotay rose to his feet and swept her up in his=20
arms. "My place, mi Corazon."=20

He carried her upstairs and only Andy heard the door slam.
The vision on the bed was tantalizing him with lust and he could feel=20
his cock throbbing in response to the look of desire on her face.=20
Pulling his clothes off, he leaned over and quickly took her little=20
bit of clothing off which she had used to drive him crazy. Smiling,=20
Tamara reached up to touch him and their bodies meshed together as he=20
laid on top of her to make skin contact and capture her mouth in a=20
deep kiss.

His hands roamed down and found her breasts soft and smooth under his=20
grasp. Squeezing them and pinching the nipples, he got a moan out of=20
her while her hands stroked down his silky smooth back. Her touch was=20
like electric and his groin rubbed against her hip.

Coming up for air, he stared down into her flushed face and slight=20
swollen lips bruised from kissing. Moving to her neck, Chakotay began=20
to explore the tender skin with kisses, nips and sucking until she=20
squealed in protest as she arched her whole body up against him. His=20
hand found her dripping wet when he encountered the slippery folds of=20
her center and when he caressed her she bucked and moan under him.=20
Settling himself between her thighs, he made a meal out of her making=20
her come again and again.

Chakotay pushed his harden cock into her hot moist center and it took=20
all his self control to keep from coming right then and there. He=20
wanted both of them to enjoy it so after catching his breath, he=20
began to establish a rhythmus and soon had the healer coming again=20
and screaming his name. A few strokes later, he came with a roar and=20
passed out on top of her.

Waking up, he found Tamara wrapped around him and they both fell=20
asleep.
=09
************=09
Four would-be-assassins dressed in dark clothes and masks made it=20
into the house while a fifth died in Andy's jaws as the furball sent=20
a danger warning to his mistress. Andy sent a metal image of the=20
danger to her instantly alerting the couple.

Tamara grabbed her dagger out of the nightstand while Chakotay=20
grabbed a heavy walking stick he had been crafting for one of the=20
children. He could see the feral gleam in her eyes and the rage on=20
her face by the moonlight as she assumed a fighting stance by the=20
door. She motioned for him to the far bedroom window when metal=20
images from Andy told her where two of the thugs were coming.

The fight was short and brutal as Tamara quickly dispatched the two=20
that came in through the door. One with a slit throat and the other=20
was dying slowly with a gut wound. Turning to Chakotay, she watched=20
as she enjoyed himself having someone to vent his pent up rage on. A=20
few moments later, two more were on floor knocked by a sturdy club=20
and a heavy hand.
"Tam?" he grasped her shoulder when she didn't answer right away.

Looking up from she where knelt by the assassin with the belly wound;=20
he was startled by the coldness in her eyes. She waved him back as=20
she mentally scanned the killer as his life slipped away and found=20
the information she was looking for. Standing up, Tamara glanced over=20
Chakotay looking for any wounds. There were only a few bruises on him.

"Go get a couple of shovels from the stables and go with Andy to get=20
started on a hole, love. We need to dispose of the evidence before=20
morning. I'll finish up in here and send them out the window," Tamara=20
ordered in a cold voice.

"What are you going to do with them?" Chakotay realized with growing=20
horror as he figured out what she was going to do.

"Dispose of them, of course." She knelt by the limp bodies and placed=20
a hand over each heart willing the muscles to stop pumping the life-
giving liquid. "Go start on the digging and I'll be with you shortly."

The look in her eyes sent him out of the house to find Andy.

Eyes of a cold-blooded killer.

Chakotay had seen the same look in his eyes and others after raiding=20
Cardassian labor camps in the Maquis. His thoughts dwelled on how=20
this gentle healer could turn into such a killer and still have any=20
sanity left. He was still sane somewhat despite the circumstances as=20
he grabbed the shovels out of the stable and followed into the tree=20
line.

The furball had already dragged the first of the five bodies to a=20
clearing roughly a hundred meters from the house. Chakotay could see=20
the outlines of other graves in the moonlight. Ignoring the stare of=20
the corpse, he began dragging the next body towards the clearing.

Joining him, the Healer was very quiet while they finished the task.=20
By morning there was no sign of the attack.

When they got back to the house and upstairs in the bedroom, Tamara=20
promptly threw up and started sobbing in his arms. Holding her close,=20
he rocked her rubbing her back and told her soothing things until she=20
fell asleep. He joined her while Andy kept guard.

************
Chakotay was restless in his dreams the next night and kept Tamara=20
awake. She caught glimpses of a tall blond male with dancing blue eye=20
who constantly teased Chakotay making him irritable. This wasn't the=20
first time Chakotay had restless dreams; there were other times she=20
caught snatches of his vivid dreams. Besides the auburn hair woman,=20
this blond male had shown up from time to time. Of course, Tamara=20
enjoyed the benefits of his erotic dreams in the early morning hours.

Like now his hard cock was throbbing against her butt cheeks like a=20
little kid demanding attention.  Turning over being careful not to=20
wake the bronze man, she took his cock and balls into her mouth and=20
hands pretending it were an all day sucker. She sucked on him gently=20
and lightly giving him a long slow blowjob. Chakotay woke up right=20
before he came and was very surprised when he did. He watched as she=20
swallowed his come and licked him clean before wiggling back up into=20
his arms falling asleep with a smile on her face. That left him=20
recovering from the surprise orgasm, puzzled and awake for a long=20
time.

Tamara woke up feeling the bile rising in her throat and dove for the=20
bathroom. Rinsing her mouth out afterwards, she took a long shower=20
and climbed back into bed. She was tired and nauseous for the third=20
day in a row, come on, healer, put it together, you're pregnant,=20
dummy. When? The night of healing Chakotay, the quick and frenzied=20
coupling on the bed. That means I'm roughly six weeks along, she=20
figured. She would double check with the Royal Physicians next week.

Chakotay was snoring lightly on her bed as she left and went=20
downstairs to her office. Silently, she closed the door so she could=20
make a few calls. There was a message on her terminal as she sat down=20
at her desk. It was from the Reigning Monarch himself commanding her=20
to bring Chakotay to the Palace on her next monthly visit next week.=20

The King wished an interview with him and her.

Her other messages included an offer to place her with the revolution=20
people, which she politely declined. One message spoke of a strange=20
starship on the fringes of Rashelan space and maybe coming to the=20
home planet to engage in trade negations. That was interesting. She=20
replied back for updates on the starship as it came closer to Rashela.

Shutting down her terminal, she slipped quietly back into bed and was=20
immediately spooned in with Chakotay's arms around her. Swiftly, she=20
fell back asleep.

************
Neelix concluded the trade with the Aceko, a family of space=20
merchants Voyager had run across. The Aceko had included a data chip=20
loaded with all their star charts and navigational logs from their=20
travels to add to Voyager's astrometrics lab.

"Captain, I'm here to give you my report on the Aceko." Neelix came=20
into the ready room where Captain Janeway was getting a fresh cup of=20
coffee from the replicator.
"Thank you, Neelix," she replied as she took the PADD from his=20
outstretched hand. "I take it that the trade was a success."

Sitting on the couch in front of the view port, she indicated for=20
Neelix to take a seat. The Talaxian seemed a bit nervous as if he had=20
something to say.

"Is there something else, Mr. Neelix?" Kathryn asked as she reviewed=20
the list of supplies they had received in trade.

"The Aceko pointed out to me that there is a wormhole approximately=20
seventy-five light years from here that could make our journey=20
somewhat shorter, Captain. It's stable and the Aceko use it on a=20
regular basis to trade with the Rashelan Empire on the other side."=20
Neelix pointed it out to her on the PADD.

"Thank you, Neelix. I'll get this to Astrometrics right away,"=20
Janeway allowed herself a wide smile. The first in many months.

Tom guided Voyager to the edge of the wormhole and hesitated for a=20
moment. When they did this, it was nearly inevitable that they would=20
never be able to turn around and hopefully find Chakotay trying to=20
catch up and come home with them.

"Take us in, Mr. Paris," Captain Janeway ordered as she stepped up to=20
stand beside him.

"Yes, Captain," he wiped a tear from eye with his sleeve and entered=20
the commands on his console to take the great little ship into the=20
next step of the journey home.

"What is it, Tom?" Her hand squeezed his shoulder. "This will take=20
nearly two and one-half years off of our journey."

"I feel like we're leaving Chakotay behind all over again, Captain."=20
Tom admitted to her.

"You're right, but he would want us to keep going and get the crew=20
home."

Voyager was guided through the wormhole with Tom's capable hands and=20
a little while later they entered the edge of the Rashelan Empire.=20
Since Voyager was a rare curiosity, Prince Deevick issued a royal=20
invitation for Voyager to come to the home world of Rashela for trade=20
and information.

************
Nine months since capture=85

Tamara dragged Chakotay with her back to the Royal Palace so they=20
could meet with the King. Trying to find Deevick, they stopped to ask=20
one of the guards where the Prince may be located.

The guard of the Royal House of Rashela happened to be a cousin of=20
the Prince Deevick, crown prince, when he back-handed Healer Tamara=20
sending her flying backwards against the wall to lie stunned and in=20
shock.  There was a loud roar of anger and the guard was bowled over=20
by a big dark-skinned slave who was bent on choking the life out of=20
him. Other guards came running on hearing the ruckus and it took a=20
serious beating to get Chakotay off of the downed guard.

Someone ran and informed the Prince, who came to see what was going=20
on.  The Banquet had been boring except for the delightful company of=20
the starship captain from Voyager. When he arrived, they all began=20
talking at once.

"Silence." He thundered as he noted the guests from the banquet were=20
becoming attracted to incident. Quiet spread across the crowd.

"Damn rotten, no good, buchagaloop!" Tamara cursed as she got up off=20
the floor drawing the Prince's attention.

"I should have known you were mixed up in this somehow, Healer=20
Tamara." Deevick smiled. "Care to explain."

A choking cough from the partially strangled guard caught their=20
attention. Tamara looked down at the guard and again Chakotay watched=20
through a bloody haze as her demeanor automatically changed to that=20
of the healer. He glanced up in time to see a pleased expression on=20
Deevick's face.

"I see the programming is doing well on her." Deevick remarked to his=20
aide unaware that Chakotay had heard him. They watched as Tamara=20
healed the guard's injuries and her own face in the meantime.

Standing up, Tamara whirled to face the Prince. "This guard, your=20
cousin, back handed me when I asked about your whereabouts. My=20
bodyguard merely jumped to my defense. Please let him go!"

With a leer on his face, Deevick replied, "No. The penalty for=20
assaulting a member of the royal family is death."

"Please," Tamara begged. "I am his owner and I assume responsibility=20
for his behavior."

"My terms." He leered and licked his lips in anticipation.

"What do you want, your highness?" Healer Tamara bowed her head=20
submissively in an attempt to throw the Prince's attention away from=20
him.

"Healer, no!" Chakotay roared as he struggled against the guards. One=20
clubbed in him in the ribs dropping the big man to his knees

Tamara whipped around and faced him with green eyes=20
flashing. "Chakotay, stop." She commanded.

"Don't do this, Tamara. Not for me." A tear rolled down his face as=20
his dark eyes burned with fear. He was shaking his head as she=20
approached him.

Deevick could see how much the slave meant to the Royal Healer. He=20
had been waiting for six years to get her back in his bed and he=20
relished the thought as he watched her plus get even for her visit=20
that night a few months back. Tamara took Chakotay's face in both her=20
hands and placed her cheek on his as she whispered in his ear.=20
Whatever, she said had a calming effect on the big man. Chakotay=20
shook his head yes and kissed her quickly as she pulled away from him=20
reluctantly and signaled the guards to take him to her quarters.

Turning back to the prince, Tamara noticed the stunned white-faced=20
Captain Kathryn Janeway standing at the edge of the crowd with a tall=20
blond human male at her side. Thinking fast, she dropped to her knees=20
in front of Deevick bowing her head and reaching out telepathically=20
to Janeway. `Kathryn, please don't do anything that would harm=20
Chakotay. Deevick can be cruel and he would use Chakotay as some kind=20
of leverage against you if he knew. It's not like I haven't handled=20
Deevick before. I am the mother of his only child. I am the Healer=20
Tamara from Earth kneeling in front of Deevick.'

Janeway almost bit through her tongue to keep quiet while realizing=20
it was the healer who had spoken to her telepathically. She poked Tom=20
Paris in the ribs to keep him quiet.=20

"Just wait," she whispered as they watched the scene in front of them.

Tom could only stare in shock at the sight of Chakotay being escorted=20
out of the area and taken down a hallway. Kathryn had a death grip on=20
his arm and he turned his attention back to events in front of him.

"Your terms, Prince Deevick?"

"Stay with me tonight. Chakotay does only ten years in prison." He=20
offered knowing she would counter-offer.

"No prison. Community service for the village. He is a storyteller."=20
Tamara countered.
"Three nights and twenty years of community service." The Prince was=20
intrigued.

"Five nights, five years community service and I retain ownership of=20
Chakotay, plus I want more visitations with Kathryn. Final offer."=20
Tamara got to her feet without the Prince's permission and faced the=20
next King of Rashela.

"Done." Deevick agreed and his aides noted it.

"Fine. When I see the paperwork, I will come to you." Tamara bowed=20
and smiled as Deevick went back to the banquet feeling like a winner.=20
She collapsed on a bench and hugged herself trying not to cry.

"Healer Tamara, may I have a word with you?" A soft lilting voice=20
asked. Tamara looked up to see the woman from her vision and=20
Chakotay's thoughts.

"Kathryn Janeway of Voyager, I dare to presume." Her tear-filled=20
green eyes meet the steely blue gray full of compassion and=20
understanding. "I'm sorry I should have protected him better, but he=20
only came because of the King's command. Other than that I would have=20
left him back at the village where he would've been under protection.=20
He's almost too damn protective of me."

"I know very well what you mean, but I think you did very well by=20
saving his life. I'll always be grateful for that." Kathryn=20
said. "May I see him, please?"

"Tonight, when the palace is quiet, tell the guard that you have an=20
injury that only the Royal Healer can fix." Tamara answered.

"How can I be sure they will take me to you?"

"I'm the only Healer on the entire planet and the royal family has=20
special interest in my abilities." Tamara stood up. "I need to go=20
heal Chakotay and calm him down. He's going to beat himself up when=20
he finds out I am spending a few nights in Deevick's bed. He sure=20
loves those guilt trips."

"You don't seem to mind." Tom Paris spoke up. "How is Chakotay?"

"I've slept with Deevick before so I know what to expect and it's all=20
part of the game of survival, Mr. Paris. Chakotay is doing as well as=20
he considering the circumstances we are both under."

"How did you speak to me telepathically? Are you a Betazed?"=20
Janeway's curiosity was up.

"No, I'm just a California girl from the beginning of the 21st=20
century who walked into a spatial and temporal rift. Something=20
happened to me in the rift. When I got here I could heal and I gained=20
some telepathic ability. Deevick and his scientists are constantly=20
experimenting on me to see if they can duplicate it, copy it or=20
genetically put it in their kids. I'm not a scientist, so I just know=20
bits and pieces from listening to the geeks due their work." Tamara=20
explained.

"21st century?"

"Later, Captain. The guards are starting to notice. I can get away=20
with quite a bit, but I don't want to push my luck. Till tonight."=20
Tamara flashed her a crooked smile. "I saved the King's life during=20
an assassination attempt, so I'm the pet of the palace and mother of=20
the princess."

Tamara left the area while Janeway and Paris went back to the banquet=20
where Deevick joined them to finish talking on the trading negations.=20

Without a glance at the guards outside of her suite, Tamara entered=20
the dark rooms and stopped in the middle of the receiving room.=20
Getting her bearings in the dim lighting from the city through the=20
windows, she headed for a side table to bring light into the suite.

"Don't light it, Tamara." His voice sounded thick and tight with=20
emotion.

"Why not? I want to see if you are all right." He could hear the=20
concern in her voice.

"Whenever you see an injury, your programming automatically kicks in=20
and you change. Deevick had you programmed, Tamara. That could be=20
dangerous." She pinpointed his location from the sound of his voice=20
and breathing to the couch.

"Chakotay, I broke that programming three years ago and I only do it=20
to keep Deevick fooled. It gives me something to laugh at him about."=20
She sat beside him and used her hands and healing sense to work on=20
his injuries. "Please, love. Don't fight me on this."

"All right, Tamara." He relaxed as the healing washed over him and=20
the bruises and cuts faded away.

"Chakotay, we have to talk."

"Deevick, I know. What did you promise him in exchange for my life?"=20
He was bitter with anger and guilt along with fresh tears flowing=20
down his face.

"Five nights with him in exchange for you to do five years of=20
community service in the village with the kids. I retain your=20
ownership and get more visitations with Kathryn." Tamara told him=20
straight out. His hands tangled in her hair.

"No. You should've let him put me=85" Her lips on his shushed him.
"Shut up for a moment, will you. You can beat yourself up later. I=20
have to tell you why this way makes all the difference in the world."=20
She hissed as her fingers reached under his shirt to play with his=20
chest.

"Tam," he growled as he brought his arms up around her back.

"I'm pregnant, you big oaf. The twins will need a live father, not a=20
dead martyr." She nibbled his neck.

"Pregnant. Twins." He went into shock.

Tamara sighed. "Men!"

She quickly divested him of his shirt and trousers while he came to=20
grips with the fact that he was going to be a father.

"Make love to me, Chakotay. Make me forget everything and everyone=20
but you as the center of my life." She chewed on his earlobe and he=20
growled in response.

Getting up from the couch, his dark eyes burned with desire catching=20
her green eyes flashing in return. Picking her up in his big arms,=20
his lips captured hers as he took her into the bedroom.=20

"You bring peace to my soul and healer of my life, Tam-a-ra." He=20
murmured in her ear as he laid her gently on the bed kissing her=20
abdomen in homage as he stood up to enjoy the sight of her. "Now, the=20
mother of my children. You make me happy, Tam. I love you."

There was a light brush against the very edge of his mind inviting=20
him to share a mind link so they could share everything during their=20
lovemaking. She always let Chakotay decide, sometime he wanted to=20
share and sometimes not. He was very private and deep as far as his=20
mind and soul went and she took great care not to intrude unless=20
invited. In the dim light of the room, she could see him shaking his=20
head no, knowing she was already tired from healing people all day=20
and didn't want her to strain herself any further.

He disrobed her slowly enjoying the sight of her creamy skin against=20
his own bronze skin. Starting at the top of her head, he explored her=20
with kisses, nips, sucking and licking the salty taste of her skin=20
while running his hands through her thick hair until it was spread=20
out on the bed like a red fan outlining them. She moved up to reach=20
for him, but he growled for her to lie still. Tamara giggled as he=20
hit the sensitive spot on the nape of her neck. His tongue ignited a=20
trail of fire down her body and center in her core.

While stopping to torture her sensual lips, he smiled as she squirmed=20
under his ministrations. In frustration, she bit his chin gently and=20
was rewarded by a rumble in his chest while pinning her hands above=20
her head. Lifting her hips off of the bed, she rubbed herself against=20
his groin, smiling when she felt him groan in arousal.

"Witch," he said in her ear as he started working his way down her=20
throat and takes her breast in his mouth sucking and biting on both=20
until she grew restless again. Releasing her hands, he brought one=20
down to her nether lips and felt how wet she was and gently inserted=20
two fingers into her. Looking up, he saw her eyes burning with=20
passion and settled himself into between her thighs with fingers and=20
tongue, licking and sucking her folds, bringing her over the edge=20
again and again.

"Chakotay," She begged bucking against his face.

He slipped his erection into her and thrust long and hard strokes=20
while covering her mouth with his. Feeling her come made him come a=20
few strokes later and he collapsed on top of her. Holding her close,=20
they both fell asleep. She awoke once to feel him cleaning her up=20
with a cool cloth and she drifted back off when he climbed in beside=20
her and held her close.

Tamara awakened to an empty bed. Rolling over, she saw him standing=20
there by the window looking up at the stars. Pulling on a robe, she=20
stood next to him. He had pulled on his trousers, but his naked chest=20
made her weak in the knees.

"May I join you?" She asked softly.

Without a word, his arms encircled her waist while resting his chin=20
on top of her head and together they watched the stars in silence for=20
awhile.

"There is something else you need to tell me, isn't there, Tam?"

"`Tis a night of many changes, Chakotay. Do you think of Janeway and=20
Voyager often?" She turned to look up in his curious eyes at the=20
choice of subject.

"I still do from time to time. Not as often as I did at first. Why do=20
you ask?" His dark eyes searched hers for answers.

"Voyager is in orbit, Chakotay. Captain Janeway was at the banquet=20
and saw our little escapade." She told him. "She knows you're here. I=20
spoke with her after I was done with Deevick."

Excitement and hope filled him as his eyes became even more alive=20
than they had the entire time she had known him. "Voyager's here.=20
Kathryn's here and I'm going home." He picked her up and twirled her=20
around the room. His dark face was beaming with joy.

There was a knock at the door, which froze them for a moment.

"It may be Deevick. Get in the bedroom," Tamara commanded pushing=20
away from him.

"I want to stay. I need to know, Tam." His eyes pleaded with=20
her. "Don't shut me out."

She turned on the lights in the receiving area. "All right, Chakotay.=20
Get in position."

Chakotay got into position by the bag in question and was barely able=20
to restrain himself as she opened the door. The guard was in the=20
doorway.

"What is it?" Tamara demanded as the guard flinched from the tone of=20
her voice.

"An injury that needs your attention, Healer." The guard stammered.

"Show them in or are you going to let him bleed to death in the=20
hallway?" She snapped. "Step aside man."

"Yes, Healer." Tamara could see Chakotay shaking in silent laughter=20
at her treatment of the guard.

The guard stepped back and let the couple into the room. When they=20
were over the threshold, Tamara slammed the door in the guard's face.=20
Tom Paris was dripping blood from a deep cut on his upper left=20
shoulder while Kathryn Janeway held a pressure dressing on it.=20

"My companion was hurt and I was told you could help him, Healer."=20
Janeway stated. Chakotay froze at the sound of her voice.=20

"Yes, I can. Let's sit him down in this chair here." Tamara gently=20
guided the pilot to the indicated chair. "I'll take care of him,=20
Captain. So you can go say hello."

"Chakotay," Kathryn turned her blue eyes with tears running to her=20
First Officer for the first time in nearly a year.

"Kathryn!" He was across the room and had her in his arms in a=20
second. "Oh gods, it's good to see you. I never thought I would see=20
you again."

"I've missed you so much, Chakotay."

Tamara turned her attention to the young man seated in front of=20
her. "Now, Mr. Paris, how did you managed to cut yourself?"
"A broken vase." Tom answered as she placed her hands over his wound=20
and he felt the healing power wash over him in it's cooling=20
effect. "What do I call you?"

"Healer Tamara, young man. Chakotay warned me about you. Now get some=20
rest." She tapped his forehead and he fell asleep without protest.=20
Sitting quietly on the couch, she watched the reunion of the couple=20
in front of her with a sinking heart. He had said he was going home.=20
Nothing about her coming along on Voyager. Seeing them together, she=20
could feel the intensity of the powerful connection and bond that=20
formed their friendship and love for one another.

"I'm so sorry, Chakotay." Kathryn apologized as she raised her hand=20
up and caressed his cheek. He leaned into the caress automatically.

"For what, Kathryn? A bunch of what ifs, should have's and could=20
have's. It's the past and if I know you, you haven't slept or eaten=20
much in the last nine months." Chakotay replied as he gathered her in=20
his arms.

"I've missed you at my side, Chakotay. How did you end up here nearly=20
three thousand light years away?" She hugged him tight.

"I believe the ship which took me used a transwarp conduit." He=20
answered as he inhaled the scent of her hair. "How is everyone on=20
Voyager?"

Tamara left them to their reunion after hearing a dull roar outside=20
in the courtyard. Leaning out the window, she saw a full-scale riot=20
going on and it was spilling into the palace. Quickly, she ran into=20
the bedroom and changed into her clothes quickly. Throwing on her=20
boots, she grabbed her healer's cloak and stepped back into the=20
receiving room.

"Chakotay, Kathryn," she interrupted them as she put the cloak=20
on. "We have to get out of here. There's a riot in the palace."

"A riot?" Chakotay came back to reality releasing Kathryn from his=20
arms.

"I imagine Deevick has finally done one too many stupid things and=20
the people are fed up." Tamara reached over and woke Paris up. "I=20
have to go."

She headed for the door, but Chakotay put his arm out and stopped=20
her. "Where are you going, Tamara?"

"For Kathryn and take her back to the village. Than we'll wait and=20
see what government rises from the ashes." She slipped out of his=20
arm. "Go home, Chakotay. I will miss you."

"I thought you would be coming to Voyager with me." He said.
"You never asked me, Chakotay. You only assumed. I told you this was=20
a night of many changes. I couldn't leave without my daughter."=20
Tamara replied.

"I'm going with you to get Kathryn and than we'll all leave on=20
Voyager, Tamara." He was adamant.

"Not this time, Chakotay. This is my battle." Tamara stated.

"I said I'm going. This also involves me and the twins, Tam. I have a=20
right to be there." His glare declared that there would be no=20
arguing. "We are in this together."

"Go put your shoes and shirt on." She smiled softly as he disappeared=20
into the bedroom.

"Here, take these." Tom Paris said as he handed her his communicator,=20
tricorder and phaser. "The big guy can show you how they work."

"Thank you, Tom." Tamara slipped the equipment into her cloak pockets.

"Who is Kathryn?" Janeway asked.

"My daughter by Deevick. I wish to get her out of the way in case=20
there is bloodshed tonight." Tamara replied.

"As I am going along to make sure of your safety, Tamara." Chakotay=20
said as he came out of the bedroom fastening his shirt.

"We'll keep in touch. Good luck!" Kathryn said. "Janeway to Voyager.=20
Two to beam up now."

The guard was not at the door nor was there anyone in the hallway as=20
they peeked out. Reaching into her pocket, she pulled the equipment=20
out and gave them to Chakotay.

"Tom said you would know how to use these." She whispered.

"Funny, you should have these." He raised an eyebrow at her. He took=20
the tricorder and phaser from her and left the communicator in her=20
hand. "Put that back in your pocket."

"Can you show me how to work these?" Tamara asked flushed with=20
excitement.

"This is a tricorder. It scans for many different kinds of things."=20
He explained as he began to calibrate it.

"What are you doing?" She kept watch down the hall.

"Setting it to scan for Kathryn. Half-human, half-Rashelan should=20
make her bio readings stand out. Which way from here?" His eyes were=20
also sparkling with life and she giggled.

"This way." She led the way into the wing of the palace where the=20
Royal family resided. A ring of guards circled the main hallway=20
blocking any attempt at entrance.

"Now what?" Chakotay asked placing the phaser and tricorder into the=20
healer's cloak.

"Play along, dear heart." Tamara said as she boldly stepped out of=20
the shadows and up to the guards with Chakotay on her heels.

"Halt and identify." The Sergeant of the guard challenged.

Tamara threw the hood of her cloak back to reveal her face. "Healer=20
Tamara with her body slave, Chakotay. I am here to check on my=20
daughter and the Royal Family."

"Let them in." Deevick said from behind the guards.

"Where's Kathryn?" Tamara asked as they entered the corridor.

"Asleep in her room, my dear. I see you brought you boy toy with you.=20
Maybe we should play some more games after this. I didn't quite get=20
enough of him the last time." Deevick leered as Chakotay growled full=20
of rage.=20

Tamara stepped into between the two. "Enough. You two can kill each=20
other later. I want to see Kathryn now!"

"We may not be in power tomorrow, Tamara. What will you do?"

"Take Kathryn and go away from here, Deevick. Take our daughter to=20
safety." She entered the bedroom that belonged to her daughter.

"They're breaking through the defenses, Prince Deevick." A guard=20
bellowed from the end of the corridor as the sound of the rioters=20
grew closer. Deevick left the room to check on defenses.

Hearing this, Tamara yelled, "Kathryn!"

************
End of Part Four
************


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************
Part Five
************

"Mommy," a little five-year-old crawled out from under the bed and=20
leaped into her arms.

"Come on, dear heart. We have to get out of here." Chakotay said=20
holding up the phaser. "Get out the communicator, Tam."

Tamara gave the communicator to Chakotay and got a tighter grip on=20
her daughter. Shots erupted from down the hall; Kathryn started to=20
cry, while Mom tried to get her to quiet down.

"Chakotay to Voyager."

"Voyager here, Commander. What can we do for you?" Janeway's voice=20
asked.

"If you can transport the three of us out of here, it would be much=20
appreciated, Captain." Chakotay asked.

"Stand by, Commander."

A moment went by, the shots grew closer and Tamara was nearly in a=20
panic for the safety of her daughter. There were sounds of yelling=20
and crashing right outside the door.

"Chakotay." Janeway said.

"Yes, Captain." There was a pounding on the door, which burst open=20
under Deevick's shoulder. He straggled in with blood pouring from=20
wounds down his chest.
"We're trying to get a lock on you, but there is some kind of=20
shielding blocking the transporter in that area of the palace. Is it=20
possible for you to get outside of the palace?" The Captain said.

"I'll see what we can do. Chakotay out." He looked at Tamara and=20
winked.

"Daddy!" Kathryn screamed.

"Kathryn, my beloved." Deevick landed in the chair clutching his=20
chest while the remaining guards battled just outside the doorway.=20
She squirmed out of Tamara's arms running to her father.

"Deevick?" Tamara asked as she went to his side and examined him. He=20
was dying.

"Heal me, Tamara." Deevick commanded as Kathryn climbed into his lap.

"No!" Chakotay yelled. "We've got to go."

The sounds of battle subsided as the guards drove the rebels back=20
into the main corridors.

"No, Deevick. I can't. To do so with the extent of your injuries=20
would do harm to my babies." Tamara said softly putting her hand on=20
her belly. "Is there another way out of the palace so I can get our=20
daughter to safety?"

Chakotay picked Kathryn up off of her dying father, wincing at her=20
screams. Deevick pulled his family crest mounted on a brooch and=20
pressed it into Tamara's hand.  "Congratulations, Tamara. Take good=20
care of our daughter. Look behind the bookcase and tell her I love=20
her and I did love you also, my fair healer. I wish you could forgive=20
me for doing to you what I did."

"I do, Deevick. Go in peace. I will tell your daughter of you when=20
she asks." Tamara said forgiving him and feeling a bit of peace for=20
her own bruised and damaged soul from her time on Rashela.

Sighing in comfort and peace, he closed his eyes and died.

Chakotay fired the phaser at the doorway when the fighting shifted=20
again back into the royal corridor. On her way to the bookcase in the=20
bedroom, Tamara grabbed a few items off of Kathryn's dresser and=20
stuffed them in her pockets. Kathryn was quiet in Chakotay's arm.=20
Finding the bookcase, Tamara was pulling on it when the fighting=20
spilled into the outer room. The bookcase opened and she was greeted=20
by the smell of musty air and damp mold from the stairway in front of=20
her.

"Chakotay, let's go." She yelled. "You can play later."

She heard the com badge chirped in her pocket and pulled it out.

"Coming, mother." He yelled back as he took one last shot, tightened=20
his grip on Kathryn and dashed across the room to the open bookcase.

"Janeway to Chakotay," came the worried voice of the Captain.

"Just a minute, Captain. We're kinda busy at the moment," Tamara said=20
as she looked up to see him racing across the room towards her.=20
Behind him, a man appeared in the doorway and took a shot at his=20
back. Chakotay saw the look in her eyes and knew what was going to=20
happen. He twisted to protect the child and hit in his lower back.

"No!" Tamara cried out. "Janeway, get us out of here now. Chakotay=20
and Kathryn have been hit."

He was unconscious when she reached his side and Kathryn was sprawled=20
across his chest. With adrenaline flowing, she grabbed him by the=20
shoulders and started dragging them towards the stairs.

"Mr. Kim, can you get through those shields yet?" Janeway fought down=20
the fear in her gut.

"Working on it, Captain." Kim's fingers were dancing across his=20
console.

The com link was still open. There were sounds of heavy thuds and=20
harsh breathing plus some colorful cursing coming from the Healer.

"Some damn fine advanced technology. Oh ya, Chakotay, All the=20
advances humans and alike have made in four fucking centuries and we=20
run into one little problem your ship can't handle." There was a=20
crunch, another expletive that the com didn't pick up and, "Jesus,=20
dear heart, you are fucking heavy."

"Tamara, can you tell what is going on and how is Chakotay and your=20
daughter?" Janeway's voice intruded on her concentration.

"What? Not really, Captain. It's quiet on the stairs and both are out=20
and injured. Have I gotten them far away enough from the shielding=20
yet?" Her voice was raspy from fatigue.

"Captain, if she can get them another three meters, we can boost=20
enough power to transport them out." Tuvok interjected.

"Did you hear that, Tamara?" Janeway asked with a smile. She was=20
taking a great liking to this fiery redhead and her temper.

"Yeah, got it. Another flight of stairs. Someone owes me a major back=20
rub, Captain Janeway." Tamara grumbled. "I'm glad now for all the hay=20
making Dad had us kids doing back on the farm in Ohio."

"You're doing fine, Tamara. I'm from Indiana by the way. I guess that=20
makes us neighbors." Janeway encouraged smiling at Tamara's saucy=20
comments.

"We got them, Captain. Transporting directly to Sick Bay." Kim=20
announced with a broad smile on his face.

"Good. I'm going to sickbay. Mr. Paris, you have the bridge. Tuvok,=20
you're with me." Janeway ordered as she headed for the turbo lift.=20
Neither noticed the absolute look of relief on Tom Paris' face as he=20
wiped a tear from his eyes.

"Commander Chakotay is just fine. He was just stunned from the shot.=20
He should be awake in an hour or so. I've healed the bruises on his=20
head." The Doctor reported as Janeway and Tuvok entered Sickbay.

"Thank you, Doctor. Now how about our guests?" Janeway asked.

"I don't know. She won't let me examine her or the little girl. Maybe=20
you can talk her into it." The Doctor sounded irritated. "My guess is=20
that she is going into shock."

Tamara was holding Kathryn and hanging on to Chakotay's hand next to=20
the bio bed where he was lying. Her green eyes wide with fright and=20
pain at her surroundings.

"Healer Tamara, I'm Kathryn Janeway. Remember, we met on the planet?"=20
Kathryn talked softly to the frightened woman.

"Kathryn Janeway, Captain of Voyager coming to take Chakotay home."=20
She mumbled for a moment.=20

"That's right, Tamara. You're on Voyager so we can take Chakotay=20
home." The Captain responded.

"Kathryn, I'm so sorry about Chakotay. So much pain. Help me!" She=20
sobbed.

"We'll help you and your daughter. May I hold her?" Kathryn picked up=20
the child when Tamara didn't offer any resistance and held=20
her. "Tamara, you're safe on Voyager. You're among friends now."
"I can relax?" Tamara questioned as she grabbed her abdomen. "Oh god!=20
Save my babies, please."

She passed out and Tuvok caught her before she could hit the floor.=20
Swiftly, the Vulcan placed her on the bio bed next to Chakotay while=20
Janeway did the same with Kathryn on the other side.

"Doctor?" She asked as he came over and ran scans on them.

"Kathryn is fine, just exhausted. She is sleeping right now." Doctor=20
said than stepped over to Tamara. "Oh, dear! She's pregnant with=20
twins and about to have a miscarriage. These contractions need to be=20
stopped. Excuse me, Captain, Mr. Tuvok." He hastily erected a privacy=20
screen around the bio bed blocking them out.

"Keep me informed, Doctor."

************
Two and half-hours later, the EMH called the bridge to report that=20
Commander Chakotay was awake and asking for the Captain. Leaving=20
Tuvok in charge of the bridge, she took the turbo lift to Sickbay.

"Doctor," she acknowledged.

"Captain, I wish to talk to you about Tamara when you have a moment."

"How is she?" Kathryn stopped when she saw Chakotay and Tamara having=20
a whispered conversation. He was holding her hand standing next to=20
her bed and brushing the hair out of her eyes.

"Tamara and the twins are out of danger. Mostly, its sheer physical=20
and mental exhaustion considering what Commander Chakotay has told me=20
that she's been through for the last six years, Captain." The Doctor=20
said. "I'm keeping her here for a couple of more days for rest and=20
observation. Commander Chakotay is free to go."

"Where is Kathryn?"

"Ensign Wildman and Naomi came by and took her home with them for a=20
couple of days." The Doctor answered.

"Thank-you, Doctor." She approached the pair who looked up at=20
her. "Chakotay, Healer Tamara."
"Captain, it's good to be back." He said his dark eyes glowing with=20
happiness.

"Captain Janeway, I wanted to apologize for my behavior earlier."=20
Tamara said.

"It's good to have you back and your apology is accepted." She=20
answered.=20

"Tamara has a question for you." Chakotay put forth on her behalf.

"Chakotay, I swear I'm going to turn you over my knee one of these=20
days." Tamara growled at him.

Kathryn chuckled while he just grinned. "What's the question?"

"May Kathryn and I go home with you and the crew on Voyager?" Tamara=20
asked quietly. "I could never take her back to my time."

"Why, of course you can. We would be happy to have you come with us."=20
She smiled.

"See, I told you she would say yes," Chakotay interjected. "And the=20
Doctor can fix your headaches and deliver our babies."

"The twins?" Kathryn raised her eyebrow at Chakotay who blushed and=20
rubbed the skin under his collar. "Nice jewelry."

"It's not jewelry in that sense, Captain. Could you hand me my cloak=20
please?" Tamara said holding out her hand.

Kathryn picked up the smooth rich green fabric and handed it to the=20
healer. Tamara reached inside to an inner pocket and pulled a golden=20
medallion out and handed it to Chakotay. When he took it from her,=20
there was a clicking noise as the collar came open along with the=20
wrist and ankle bands.

"Tam?" He questioned with wide eyes.

"Your official freedom, Chakotay. It was arranged last month and I=20
was waiting for the jeweler to finish this so we could celebrate. It=20
was one of the things I was going to tell you last night when we were=20
interrupted. I wanted you to be free to choose for yourself the way=20
you wanted to live your life." Tamara grew quiet, afraid that she had=20
said too much.

"It's beautiful, Tam. Thank-you." Chakotay said as he admired the=20
golden coin. There was an engraving of his tattoo on one side and her=20
sigil as a healer on the other side.

"It was meant to be=85never mind." Tamara threw her hand over her mouth=20
blushing with embarrassment.

"You had a lot of plans go wrong last night, I take it?" Kathryn=20
commented with a mixture of sadness and joy. She could tell that=20
Tamara had meant to ask Chakotay to be her husband after seeing that=20
medallion and the looks Tamara had given it and the way she stared at=20
Chakotay.

"Yes, I was hoping to make our lives a little better while getting=20
plans put together to try and get off that planet. When we got to the=20
palace, I left Chakotay in my rooms and went to the Royal Physician=20
to confirm my pregnancy. Once he confirmed it, I went to the jewelers=20
to pick up the medallion and meet with my contacts. After the=20
meeting, I went to get Chakotay to go see Kathryn and Prince Deevick=20
when the entire ruckus started." Tamara explained as her eyes=20
lingered on the medallion.

"What contacts were you talking about, Tam?" Chakotay watched her=20
eyes linger on the medallion and rise up to look at him.

"A couple of years ago, I healed the Royal Bookkeeper and his son=20
after an accident that should have killed them both. We became very=20
good friends and he would help me out every once in awhile. About=20
three months after Chakotay landed in my life, literally," she=20
grinned, "the bookkeeper began making discreet inquiries about the=20
ships coming to and from Rashela and the possibility of passage."=20
There was a look of amazement on his face.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He asked.

"You were depressed at the time because we had figured out that=20
Voyager was over three thousand light years away from here and it=20
seemed unlikely that you would end up rescued by them. Plus you were=20
also recovering the assault. I didn't want to get your hopes up only=20
to have them dashed again." She stopped speaking for a second. "Why=20
didn't you tell me about crashing the wagon?"

The Doctor interrupted. "Pardon me, but my patient needs her rest."

"Bully." Tamara commented. "Chakotay, what about the Andy and the=20
children in the village?"

"I'll see what I can find out, Tam. Get some rest." Chakotay=20
answered. "I'll be back later to check on you. By the way, how did I=20
get all those bruises on my head?"

"I dropped you down a flight of stairs while trying to get you out=20
from under the shielding." She kissed him on the cheek. "I hope you=20
don't suffer any permanent damage."

Tamara winked at Kathryn who was trying not to laugh out loud at the=20
incredulous look on Chakotay's face. Than he smiled and began to=20
laugh and the two ladies joined in.

Eventually, the pair left and Tamara watched as Kathryn led and=20
Chakotay followed as they had been doing for years that it was=20
natural for both. Janeway as the leader and Chakotay as the follower=20
and protector for her actions and from herself. She settled down for=20
some sleep placing her hands on her abdomen in a protective gesture.

Tom turned from the doorway to the lab and returned to his chores for=20
his shift in Sickbay, glad that Chakotay was back but unsure about=20
the healer. She was an enigma already to him, she seem to know him=20
and was able to read him with those uncanny green eyes. He had caught=20
her watching him a few times already while he worked around Sickbay.

The Captain and Commander strolled onto the bridge where the crew=20
welcomed him back.

"Any word on which government is running things on Rashela?" Janeway=20
asked.

"I have been monitoring their communications and it appears the=20
rebels are sitting up a new government ever as speak, Captain." Tuvok=20
answered. "Welcome back, Commander."

"Thank you, Tuvok. Captain, I'd like permission to go down to the=20
orphanage and see if I can find Andy." Chakotay asked as he stood by=20
her chair.

"Where exactly is this orphanage, Chakotay?" Kathryn asked.

"About one hundred miles west of the palace centered in huge hunting=20
reserve.  The house is about one-half mile south of the village=20
setting off the road a bit." He described it and the surroundings.

"Captain, I've got the location the Commander described." Harry Kim=20
said.

"Send the coordinates to the transporter room. Commander, do you need=20
someone to go with you?" Kathryn offered.

"Thank you, no, Captain. I'll only be a few minutes." Chakotay left=20
the bridge.

************
Chakotay materialized just outside of the house and found Sarina=20
sprawled face down in the flowerbed beside the back door. Her checked=20
her pulse, nothing. Going into the house, he found it ransacked and=20
trashed. In the upstairs bedroom, he pulled up the floorboards in the=20
closet and retrieved a bag of items extremely personal to Tamara. He=20
found a few small items among the ruins of the room and added them to=20
the bag.

Slinging the bag over his shoulder, he pulled out the tricorder and=20
started scanning the area. No life signs, but many bodies.

"Chakotay to Voyager. Two to beam up."

"Energizing, Commander."

Kathryn was waiting for them in the transporter room when they=20
materialized. Her eyebrows shot up when she saw who came up with=20
Chakotay.

"What is that, Commander?"

"This is Andy. Andy, meet Captain Janeway." Chakotay grinned as the=20
black furball smiled at the Captain and all three purple eyes blinked=20
at her. Andy bounded off the platform and lay down at Janeway's feet=20
wrapping his massive paws around her legs.

"Chakotay?" she was more curious than scared.

"He trusts you, Kathryn. Tamara rescued him six years ago from a=20
failed genetic experiment. She calls him a mood sensor. He was hiding=20
in the edge of the woods. I believe he saw what happened to the=20
orphanage." Chakotay explained as Kathryn reached down and stroked=20
him behind his floppy ears and was rewarded by his rendition of a=20
purr, a grating sound.

"What happened down there, Commander?" Sensors showed no sign of=20
life, but many bodies, mostly children." She looked up and saw the=20
tears in his eyes.

"They murdered the children, Kathryn. From the tiny babies to the=20
teenagers, no one was spared," he said softly. "They didn't want to=20
leave any witnesses and they didn't, however there are forty three=20
children unaccounted for."

"Some got away?"

"I don't know. I'll explain it all in my report. Right now, I'd like=20
the Doctor to take a look at Andy." Chakotay said his shock and rage=20
barely in control.

Andy was whimpering as he crawled over to Chakotay's feet wrapping=20
his massive paws around his knees. Looking into the purple eyes,=20
Chakotay could see the distress and pain reflected there. Dropping to=20
his knees, he gave the furball a big hug feeling the tension in his=20
body drain away. The big black tongue slurped over his face causing=20
Kathryn to chuckle.=20
Glancing up at the Captain, Chakotay was a great deal more relaxed=20
and at peace. "I guess we better get moving along."

Tamara awoke when she felt a familiar tongue on her face. Squealing=20
with delight, she dug her arms into the furball and hugged him tight.=20
The grating purr sounded really loud in Sickbay.

"Andy, what's wrong?" She sensed his distress and her eyes grew=20
vacant as he relayed the images as he had seen.

"Tam, don't." Chakotay tried to warn her as he recognized the look on=20
her face while she held Andy.

Tamara didn't hear him. With her arms around Andy, she slid from the=20
bio bed and curled around the furball on the floor. Chakotay reached=20
down intending to pick her up when a snarling snout snapping got in=20
his face. Jumping back, Chakotay nearly knocked Janeway over until=20
the Doctor steadied her. Satisfied with their distance, Andy settled=20
back down in Tamara's arms keeping one eye open at them.

"I'm calling security." Janeway's hand was halfway to her com badge=20
when Chakotay stopped her.

"Kathryn, please!" He pleaded with her. "Let me do this." His heart=20
was pounding and pulse racing from the near attack. In the nine=20
months he had known Tamara and Andy, the furball had hardly ever=20
shown any type of aggression whatsoever towards him and that was=20
unnerving.  Nearly two minutes went by before her eyes began to come=20
into focus and she sat up pushing Andy out of her lap.=20

"Tam?" Chakotay questioned full of concern and fear.

"Were you going to tell me what happened, Chakotay?" She asked=20
accusingly.

"When you were stronger, yes," he confessed.

"Cry for the innocent, join with me in their pain," she mused as=20
tears slipped down her face. "Mourn not the adults, they've lived.=20
Cry for those=85"

"...who haven't had a chance to experience life to the fullest."=20
Janeway finished for her. "That's an obscure poem, how do you know=20
it?"

"I wrote it when I was my twenties and a great deal of death and=20
destruction was going on." Tamara stood up and leaned against the bio=20
bed, feeling faint. She didn't resist as Chakotay got her back into=20
the bed.=20

The doctor sedated her and shooed the command officers out of his=20
sickbay.

To Chakotay it was strange to be back in uniform. A lot had happened=20
in the last nine months and he didn't know if he was ready for duty=20
just yet. The Doctor and the Captain both agreed that he should get=20
back to work. Tuvok had gone back to Chief of Security with no fuss=20
and vacated the First Officer's quarters the night before when=20
Chakotay was released from Sickbay.

All the crew, especially the Maquis, was giving him well wishes and=20
welcome backs left and right in the corridors and in the mess hall.=20
Neelix fussed over him the whole time filling him in on everything=20
that had happened while he had been gone. Noting the time, he=20
realized he had just enough time to see Tamara before his shift.

Tamara was awake and glaring at the EMH running another scan over her=20
while Andy growled in irritation when he stepped into sickbay.=20
Grinning at the sight, he went over to her bed to distract her.

"Good morning, Tam. Sleep well?" Chakotay asked trying to keep a=20
straight face while Andy licked his hand.

"No, not with this holothingy constantly hovering," she growled. "He=20
thinks I should talk to a counselor about what I've been though and I=20
said no."

"It is a very good suggestion. She only needs to stay at least two=20
more days. I want to make sure there are no more contractions." The=20
Doctor said as he finished the scans.

"What do you mean no more contractions, Doc?" Chakotay asked as=20
looked sharply at Tam who had her arms crossed and refused to look at=20
him.

"She almost miscarried again last night after the shock of the=20
massacre wore off. I'll leave you two alone." The Doctor went into=20
this office.

"Why didn't anyone notify me, Tamara?" He reached over and lifted her=20
face up so he could see he eyes.

"I didn't want you to worry. I've caused you enough trouble lately."=20
Tears slipped down her face. "I don't want to be a burden to you."

"Hey, I thought we agreed that we are doing this together so=20
everything and anything about the pregnancy I want in on, okay?" He=20
wiped the tears from her face. Giving her a gentle kiss on her lips,=20
he said, "You could never be a burden to me. I enjoy you and your=20
sense of humor and fun too much. You've made me laugh during some=20
rough times and I thank you for that."

"Ditto, Cha. Doc says I need less stress in my life. Like how the=20
hell will I manage that with a five year old who just lost her=20
father, get a new place to live, fit in somewhere on this ship and no=20
clothes." The worry lines were coming back.

"Let me worry about that. Relax and get some sleep." Chakotay kissed=20
her on the cheek.

"I'm bored. Is there some books around so I can read or music I can=20
listen, too. His opera is very irritating to my ears right now." She=20
perked up and he laughed.

"I'll see what I can do. I have to go back to work today. May I join=20
you for lunch?" Chakotay asked.

Tamara took a really good look at the red and black uniform on=20
Chakotay and whistled in appreciation. "Handsome, you cut a fine=20
figure in that outfit."

Chakotay had the grace to blush at her forwardness and jumped when=20
she leaned over and pinched his butt. He grabbed her hand, kissed it=20
and left sickbay to go to work. With Tamara now on the ship, this was=20
going to prove to be a very interesting trip home.

************
End of Part Five
************


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************
Part Six
************
See Part One for disclaimer

"Welcome back, Commander." Captain Janeway said as he strolled onto=20
the bridge in official capacity. The bridge crew minus Tuvok clapped=20
and cheered.

"Thank you. It's great to be home." Chakotay said as he shook hands=20
with everyone and got a big hug from B'Elanna Torres and to his=20
surprise Tom Paris hugged him and had tears in his blue eyes.

"Tuvok, it's good to see you."

"I am pleased at your return, Commander. The ship has missed you."=20
Tuvok said his dark eyes shinning.

"Thanks, Tuvok."

"Well, people. Shall we get back to work?" The Captain said.

"Yes, ma'am." Chakotay said.

He was home.

************
"This is going to take some getting used too, Chakotay." Tamara=20
admitted as they left sickbay. It had been four days since they had=20
been onboard Voyager and the first time Tamara was allowed out of the=20
EMH's sight. He had kept her for an additional day when she had=20
learned about the massacre at the orphanage. "Gray walls. Military=20
all right."

"How would you know about the military, Tam?" Chakotay chuckled at=20
her amusement.
"I spent six years in the United States Army, Commander," as she gave=20
him a full military salute and than blew him a kiss.

"That's funny. You've always struck me as the kind of person who=20
likes to rebel against authority." He sighed as he realized just how=20
complex this woman was and she was full of surprises.

"What makes you think I wasn't in trouble in the military?" Her green=20
eyes were dancing. "Stories for another time, handsome. By the way,=20
where do I get to set up housekeeping for Kathryn and I?"

"I had maintenance enlarge my quarters. There's room for all of us."=20
Chakotay sounded excited. "We still need some furniture, but that=20
will only take a few more days."

"All right," Tamara said, but her smile no longer reached her=20
eyes. "Shall we go?"

"Right this way, Tam." Chakotay didn't notice the sad look in her=20
eyes. "After we get settled, I'll give you the grand tour."

Chakotay's quarters now had three bedrooms, living area, bath, dining=20
area and a corner set aside for Tamara to do with as she wished. It=20
was Spartan with only a few decorations of North American Indian=20
design that Tamara could recognize.  The bedrooms were set up with=20
one for Kathryn, one for a nursery and the master for Chakotay and=20
Tamara.=20

Tamara was absolutely delighted with the replicator and ordered a cup=20
of coffee with hazelnut cream. She was like a little girl squealing=20
with delight when the coffee appeared on the pad.  Wrinkling her nose=20
with the delicious smell of coffee for the first time in six years,=20
she took a sip and relaxed watching the planet below in the view port.

"Shouldn't you be avoiding caffeine right now with the babies, Tam?"=20
Chakotay asked as he got a cup of herbal tea.

"Don't you start, Chakotay. This one is just a treat. It's been six=20
years and one cup is not going to hurt anything." She growled as she=20
turned to stare back out the view port.

Chakotay came up behind her and put his arms around her waist,=20
kissing her neck and inhaling the scent of her. She could feel his=20
arousal pressing into her butt cheeks. She leaned into his embrace=20
needing some comfort and safety in his loving ways. He took her cup=20
and sat it on the table watching her eyes grow dark with passion.=20
Without a word, he picked her up and carried her into the master=20
bedroom.

"Computer, engage privacy lock."

************
Naomi and Kathryn joined them for dinner and they had a good time=20
before Naomi went off back to her quarters. Tamara helped her=20
daughter get ready for bed in their new home.

"Mommy, can I tell you something?" Kathryn asked as she got under the=20
covers and Andy joined them on the bed.

"You can tell me anything, baby. I'll never keep anything from you no=20
matter if it may hurt or not." Tamara said as she brushed a stray=20
lock of hair from her eye.

"Daddy loved you very much. He always talked about you even when you=20
made him angry. Why did you make him mad, Mommy?" Kathryn asked.

"Your Daddy hurt me, darling, and I never forgave him till he die the=20
other day. Besides, over the years, we found that we like to argue. I=20
did come to care for him, but I could never love someone who is=20
intentionally cruel. He hurt a lot of people, Kathryn." Tamara=20
explained.

"I know, Mommy and I am sorry." She burst into tears and Tamara held=20
her and let her cry all she wanted.

"You have nothing to be sorry for, baby."

A few moments later, the tears were gone and a cool cloth dried her=20
face.
=09
"Mommy, can Chakotay tell me a bedtime story?" Kathryn asked. "I=20
heard he is a storyteller."
=09
"Let me ask him, baby. Will you ask him to tuck you in too? He would=20
really like that," Tamara kissed her daughter. "Goodnight, Cat."
=09
She knew Chakotay was waiting for her when she entered their bedroom
=09
"Cat wants to know if you will tell her a bedtime story. I'm going to=20
take a shower," she said as he smiled happily. He had been hoping Cat=20
would let him in. Cat had been avoiding him since her father had=20
died.=20

Tamara pulled her clothes off and got the water started. She could=20
sense his arousal and see the desire burning in his dark eyes.=20
Chakotay tore his eyes from Tam's lush body and took a moment to=20
compose himself. He had been hoping for a chance to become better=20
acquainted with Kathryn. Lately, she had taken to being called Cat=20
when Mommy had remarked how much she was moving like a cat recently.
"Hi, Cat. I hear you would like a story." Chakotay said as he entered=20
the room. Tamara and Cat had decorated the room in tan, green and=20
gold and it suited Cat's coloring.

"Yes, sir." She lay in bed snuggled up to Andy. "I don't know what to=20
call you."

"Whatever you feel comfortable with," he sat on the edge of the=20
bed. "What kind of story do you wish to hear, sweetheart?"

"Are you going to marry Mommy?" Cat blurted out with her lower lip=20
trembling.

"I don't know." At least he could be honest about that.

That question shook him to the core. Marry Tam? He hadn't considered=20
it seeing that she seem content with the way things were. Tamara also=20
never said anything or even hinted at marriage because she knew of=20
the conflict in his heart.

"Chakotay?" a voice interrupted.

"I'm sorry, Cat. Let me tell you about lazy coyote and busy beaver."

************
The new government of Rashela contacted Voyager and requested contact=20
with Healer Tamara to help settle some matters of state.

"Captain Janeway to Healer Tamara." The new com badge on her tunic=20
startled her and she dropped her coffee on the floor and the front of=20
her shirt.

"Ouch, that hurts," Tam said plus a few choice words while yanking=20
the hot shirt off over her head.

"Are you all right, Healer?" Janeway asked.

"No, I just burned myself with nice hot coffee. I need some cool=20
water on this. What did you want, Captain?" Tamara sounded irritated.

Janeway looked at Chakotay who smirked and raised his eyebrows back=20
at her. Tom was choking on his laughter and Harry was trying to look=20
busy.

"The new government of Rashela wishes to confer with you on several=20
matters of state. They are standing by," Janeway said. "Can you come=20
up to the bridge? I think they would like a face to face answer."

"Let me grab a clean shirt and I'll be right there."

"Thank you, Healer."
Tamara dried herself off threw on a clean green shirt and headed for=20
the bridge. On her arrival, she noted Captain Janeway talking to=20
someone on the planet that she didn't know. She walked onto the=20
bridge to let them know she was there and Chakotay came to stand=20
behind her.

"Hello, Healer Tamara. It's nice to see you again." Said the male=20
Rashelan on the viewscreen.

"You may know me, sir, but I don't seem to recall you." Tamara=20
answered bluntly.

"My apologies, Healer. I am Premier Belbase of the new government of=20
Rashela. We once met a Royal function several years ago." The dark=20
haired blue eyed male said.

"Nice meeting you. Captain Janeway said you had some questions. I=20
also have a few of my own." Tamara said hoping for news of the=20
missing children from the orphanage.

"Yes, there are several issues we need some clarification on. I was=20
hoping you could come so we could have a meeting, Healer." Belbase=20
said using his diplomatic tone of voice.

"No, I am not leaving Voyager." Tamara said flatly sensing Chakotay=20
tensing up behind her. "I will not endanger my babies." Her hands=20
went to her belly in a protective gesture. "I've almost lost them=20
twice now. You can give me 43 or 57 reasons to come down, but I will=20
not." His hand was on her shoulder.

"You would be welcome to come aboard Voyager, Premier or we can=20
arrange calling conferences in our lounge where it would be more=20
private." Janeway offered.

Belbase could understand the Healer perfectly in this argument.=20
Children were the most precious resource and her protective instincts=20
were overdrive. "Thank you, Captain. Healer, is this satisfactory for=20
you?"

"Yes, it is, Premier."

************
Tamara was settled in the lounge with a PADD to make notes. Frowning,=20
she tossed it aside and asked the replicator for a notebook of paper=20
and two ink pens plus a fresh cup of coffee. With items in hand, she=20
sat down on the couch near the viewscreen and watched the planet=20
floating underneath Voyager in the view port until Chakotay came in.

"Hey, Tam. Are you all set? The Premier is standing by to start when=20
you are." He leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. "Do you want me=20
to stay with you?"

"I'm ready. Good and I'll call you if I run into trouble. However, I=20
do have a question for you." Her hand reached up and caressed his=20
cheek.

"Ask away." He leaned into the caress and his dark eyes were full of=20
desire and many questions on these activities.

"Does Voyager need supplies that Rashela can supply?" She asked=20
feeling desire under his gaze. Her heart started to pound and her=20
face was flushed.

"I believe so. Why?" He frowned.

"Can you get a list of things Voyager needs? And do you have room for=20
a warp capable shuttle?" She was pushing her luck, but she wanted to=20
help Voyager in any way she could.

"The list won't be a problem. A shuttle we can always use. What are=20
you up to, Tam?" Curious, he watched her write a list of things on=20
the pad of paper.

"A little horse trading, handsome." She grinned. "Some people owe me=20
and I intend to try and cash in."

"I'll send the list on your PADD, dear heart. Let me know if you need=20
anything," he said in her ear.

"You naked on your knees in front of me," she smiled at that thought=20
and laughed as he blushed furiously. He walked away a little stiffly=20
and left her alone in the lounge.

"Computer, please put me through to the Premier." She faced the=20
viewscreen as Belbase appeared in front of her. "Hello, Premier.=20
Shall we get started?"

"Yes, Healer. First off, we would like to know=85."

************
The turbo lift doors opened and Tamara stepped onto the bridge with=20
her PADD in one hand and her paper notes tucked under her left arm.=20
She had a pen in between her teeth and the other tucked behind her=20
right ear.

"So, how did it go, Tam?" Chakotay asked full of curiosity.

"Fine. Is the Captain around?" Tam asked sounding distracted.

"In her ready room."

"Thank-you, sir." She made her way across the bridge and chimed the=20
ready room door signal.
"Come in," Janeway looked up as Tamara entered her ready room.

"Hello, Captain. Do you have a few minutes to go over this list with=20
me?" Tamara said as she stopped a few feet from the Captain sitting=20
on the couch by the view port.

"Of course, Tamara. Have a seat. Would you like something to drink?"=20
Kathryn offered noting that her coffee was ice cold.

"Ice water, please. Horse trading tends to get me dehydrated and any=20
more coffee and I'll have the Doctor and Chakotay down on me." Tamara=20
grinned as she sat down on the couch with her feet and legs curled=20
under her. Kathryn found herself grinning in return; Tamara's good=20
mood was infectious.

"I know what you mean." Kathryn said as she got the drinks from the=20
replicator. She handed Tamara the water. "Here you go."

"Thank you, Captain." The ice water refreshed her parched throat; "I=20
haven't done that much bullshitting and horse trading in years. It=20
felt very good. Here's the list of supplies I got for Voyager, plus=20
one warp capable shuttle a little bigger than the Delta Flyer."

"Please call me Kathryn in private." Kathryn took the PADD Tamara=20
handed her and spent a few minutes going over the list. "What are the=20
two dozen heartleaf bushes for?"

"A caffeine high tea, Kathryn. I'd like to introduce you too when you=20
get tired of replicated coffee," she laughed. "I got hooked on the=20
stuff."

"You did an excellent job, Tamara, but this most of cost a great deal=20
of money. I can't let you do this." Kathryn said seriously.

"Kathryn, listen. Most of this is from favors people owed me. I did=20
favors on the side as part of the political games that the monarchy=20
played. Only a few items cost any money and was easily deducted from=20
my accounts." She explained. "Please, let me do this. I would like to=20
contribute to the journey home."

"All right. I can see I'm going to have to put you on future trading=20
teams," they both laughed. "Now what's this ship you managed to=20
procure?"

"It was Deevick's private space yacht. I merely pointed out that it=20
now belonged to Princess Kathryn." Tamara snickered. "I hear Chakotay=20
has a habit of crashing shuttles. I was thinking of getting my own=20
pilot's license."

The door chimed.

"Come in." Kathryn called out.

Chakotay came in with curiosity on his face and both women burst out=20
laughing.

"What's so funny, ladies?" He smiled flashing his dimples.

"Nothing. Just girl talk." Tamara said trying to look composed and=20
started snickering again. "I should tell you about the time he broke=20
the supply wagon and tried to hide it."

Chakotay was feeling slightly uncomfortable from the sound of their=20
conversation, that he was the subject or topic of their current=20
discussion. He flushed darkly over the broken wagon.

"What can we do for you, Commander?" Kathryn cocked an eyebrow in his=20
direction.

"I was hoping to invite both of you to dinner." Chakotay smiled at=20
his save.

"Sorry, Chakotay. I'll be working late. I still have a few more=20
people to talk to on the surface," Tamara gathered her PADD and=20
notebook and stood up. "You two go ahead. Thank you, Kathryn."

"You're welcome, Tamara. Please keep me posted on the situation."=20
Kathryn said.

"Dinner, Kathryn?" He was hopeful.

"Love too, but I have plans. Rain check?" She got up from the couch=20
and picked up the empty cups.

"You got it. How did the talks go?" Chakotay was reluctant to go. It=20
felt good to be back in the ready room with her.

"Very promising so far. Tamara has managed to fill nearly 78 percent=20
of the supply lists. Plus she got a space yacht capable of warp=20
speed." She put the cups in the recycler. The door chimed=20
again. "Come in."

Tuvok entered the ready room. "Captain, it is nearly 1900. You wanted=20
me to remind you that we are having dinner before the poetry reading=20
tonight."

"Coming, Tuvok. Good night, Chakotay."

"Goodnight, Kathryn, Tuvok."

When Tamara did not return to their quarters by 0200 A.M. Chakotay=20
went looking for her. "Computer, location of Healer Tamara."

"Healer Tamara is in Observation Lounge 2."

Tamara didn't stir as he entered the darken lounge and walked over to=20
her. She was asleep on a low couch facing the view port with a smile=20
on her face. There was a pen behind her ear; a PADD in her right hand=20
and notepaper scattered around along with the remains of a meal.=20
Sensing his presence, she woke and watched him through slitted eyes=20
as he cleaned up her mess.

"Hey, handsome. What are you doing out at this time of morning?"=20
Tamara whispered reaching over and running a hand down his leg.

"I got worried when you didn't come home." Chakotay answered as he=20
took the meal tray over to the disposal unit. "You should've called."

"Well, I didn't know it was going to run this late and second of all,=20
since when do I have to answer to you about my whereabouts when the=20
computer can give you my location anytime you ask!" Tamara was=20
starting to get annoyed at him.

Chakotay took her mood at being awakened with the hormones of her=20
pregnancy. "Let's go to bed. You need a good night's sleep, Tam. Plus=20
I hate being alone anymore."

"Okay, Chakotay." She stood up slowly sensing the tension in his=20
beautiful body. A stab of pain lanced through her forehead.

Her sudden inhale of breath and the hand to her forehead told=20
Chakotay that she had a dazzle headache coming on.

"Let's get you to sickbay, Tam." Chakotay helped her and a few=20
minutes later they were in sickbay.

"Please state the nature of the medical emergency," the EMH said as=20
he appeared in front of them.

"Here's you chance, Doctor. I'm having one of my dazzle headaches."=20
Tamara said dryly as she sat on a bio bed while Chakotay hovered.

"Now maybe we can find out what is causing these headaches," the EMH=20
commented as he ran the tricorder over her. He hemmed and hawed at=20
his findings. "That explains it."

"Explains what, Doc?" Chakotay asked, the worry over Tam's headaches=20
evident in his voice as his hand crept into hers.
"Several of her implants are short circuiting which is causing the=20
headaches. I would like to remove the implants to prevent further=20
damage to your brain." The Doctor looked worried with his brows drawn=20
together.

"Can you repair the implants?" Tamara asked as her grip on Chakotay's=20
hand tightened.

"I assumed you would want them out," the doctor confessed his=20
confusion.

"The implants help me control the healing and the telepathic=20
abilities. Without them, I wouldn't be able to function in a normal=20
way." Tamara volunteered. "I can block out thoughts around me=20
otherwise it would be out of control. When the scientists first=20
worked on me I was projecting emotions and thoughts all over the=20
place and reading other people's inner most thoughts. It was a bad=20
time until they came up with the implants from the Borg technology=20
the scientists had acquired."

"You never told me that, Tam." Chakotay was shocked.

"Dear heart, we still have a lot to learn about each other, besides I=20
didn't want to scare you away if you knew I had a head full of=20
metal," her green eyes danced with mischief before another stab of=20
pain made her frown. "Doc, can you make the pain go away or not?"

Picking up a hypo spray, he called up the medicine he had in mind and=20
injected it into her neck. Monetarily, Tamara was free of pain and=20
felt better.

************
When Tamara awoke, she was surprised at how clear her thinking was.=20
Chakotay was asleep in the chair, his head against the wall, next to=20
her bio bed, snoring softly, which made her smile. Flexing her=20
thoughts a little, she discovered her mind shielding was more to her=20
control and kept unwanted thoughts out. There were soft sounds of=20
opera coming from the EMH's office and she could hear him singing.=20
Curling up on her side so she could watch Chakotay awhile, Tamara=20
went back to sleep.

"Hey, sleepyhead. Are you going to waste the whole day by lazing=20
around?" She felt Chakotay's lips on her ear and a surge of arousal=20
went through her and she trembled. He chuckled and drew back as she=20
stretched her muscles.

"Only if you join me, handsome." She batted her eyelashes at him and=20
twitched her hip in his direction. "Anyway, I need to finish the=20
talks this morning."

"I'm only doing a half-shift this morning so we can do something=20
together this afternoon," his eyes were full of desire and concern.=20
His heart lurched at the sight of her body rising from the bio bed.=20
She was so beautiful in her pregnancy.
She sensed his concerns over her welfare. "I'm fine, Chakotay. I=20
don't have any intentions of going anywhere dangerous until the twins=20
are born." She reassured him. "There's too much to live for. Like how=20
many different ways of making love to you I can come up with. The=20
children. Getting home to Earth. Now go to work, Commander."

She kissed him and sent him on his way. The Doctor let her go with=20
the promise to return if any more headaches appeared. Briefly, she=20
stopped at their quarters for a quick shower and a change of clothes.=20

Tam found her notes and PADD in the lounge where she had left them.=20
Supplies were arriving on Voyager and the shuttle was to due to=20
arrive in one hour. She needed to conclude her business so the ship=20
could get underway, so she placed one last call to the Premier to=20
thank him and wish Rashela luck with a democratic due process. Her=20
next call involved the Royal Bookkeeper and the final liquidation of=20
her assets as well as those of Cat's and arrange the equivalent in=20
trade goods for future deals.

The last call she made was one she had been dreading. Giloy appeared=20
on the screen with the missing children and babies from the village.=20
A tear fell from her eye as she felt their love, understanding,=20
farewells and forgiveness.

"Good bye, Little Mother! Go in peace and happiness. Thank you for=20
all of this. Our future is much more secure now." Giloy said quickly=20
and cut the link.

Shedding a few more tears, Tamara shut the door in her mind on the=20
children she was leaving behind. The memory faded to a blur and she=20
dove into her notes for a few minutes while reining in her emotions.=20
Gathering her things, she headed for the shuttle bay and her new=20
ship.=20

They were tractoring it in when she arrived and she stood there=20
looking it over while it was tucked into the shuttle next to the=20
Delta Flyer. It was long, sleek and black like a cat.

"What a beauty. I wonder how she handles," Tom Paris showed up next=20
to her.

"That depends on what kind of handling you're referring too, Mr.=20
Paris?" Tam retorted with a big smile. "I'll let you know when I'm=20
done piloting him on the maiden voyage."

"How about if I take her out?" Chakotay asked from behind them. Tom=20
and Tam turned as one, looked at the amused look on the commander's=20
face and busted out laughing.

"Is this a private joke or can anyone join in?" asked a familiar=20
voice to Tamara behind them.
"LeeRon?" Tamara turned around and faced the pilot coming out of the=20
new ship.

"Tamara, it's good to see you." The tall Rashelan greeted his friend=20
warmly as she embraced him in a fierce hug and a sound kiss on the=20
cheek.

Tom noticed the glowering face on the commander at the sight of the=20
two hugging.

"I've brought you the Fantasy and now I'm supposed to download the=20
pilot program from my mind. Are you really capable of doing that?"=20
LeeRon asked with a slight edge in his voice.

"Yes, LeeRon. I can and you know I'll not hurt you. Just relax and=20
think about the pilot program especially where the Fantasy is=20
concerned and I'll take care of the rest." Tam said trying to soothe=20
the pilot's fears. She placed her hands on his face and slipped into=20
his mind making a copy of his lessons and experiences from the pilot=20
programming. It only took a few moments and LeeRon didn't feel a=20
thing as she slipped back out of his memories. "Thanks, LeeRon."

"That didn't hurt a bit." He grinned back at her.

"Are you going to introduce your friend, Healer Tamara?" asked the=20
cold voice of Chakotay. Tamara flinched as she picked up on the waves=20
of anger and jealousy radiating off of him. It was embarrassing for=20
both of them.

"Sure thing, Commander," Tam said with a chill in her voice. "Pilot=20
LeeRon, this is Commander Chakotay, First Officer and Lt. Tom Paris,=20
chief helmsman and a flyboy like yourself. Gentlemen, LeeRon from=20
Rashela."

"Nice to meet you." LeeRon said suddenly feeling very uncomfortable.

"Pleasure," Tom said shaking hands with the fellow pilot.

Chakotay nodded his head. His dark eyes were burning with jealousy=20
which was also annoying Tamara into irritation at him.

Linking her arm with LeeRon's, she said, "I'll escort you to the=20
transporter room, Pilot." She pulled him across the shuttle bay and=20
out the door.

Tom turned to the Commander," Jealous of something, Commander?" Then=20
he turned on his heels and left the hanger deck before Chakotay could=20
say anything to him.

Chakotay had to stop himself from throttling the pilot and with an=20
effort left the area wondering what was wrong with him. Why would=20
Tamara greeting an oblivious old friend bother him so bad? He was=20
acting like a jealous teenage boy. After brooding for a few moments,=20
he headed for his quarters to look for Tamara and have a talk with=20
her.

************
End of Part Six
************


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************
Part Seven
************
See Part One for disclaimer

Tamara did not want to be found and she had learned how to hide over=20
the last few years. After taking LeeRon to the transporter room, she=20
dropped her PADD and com badge on the dining table in the quarters=20
she shared with Chakotay and left again taking her notepad and pens=20
with her. Her anger at his hovering and jealousy was building and she=20
didn't want to face at the moment. She wandered around the ship=20
looking for a place to sit, think and write. Her stomach growled in=20
hunger so she went to the mess hall for some lunch. Getting a tray of=20
something pink and gray along with some fruit and rolls, she looked=20
for a place to sit in the busy mess hall.

"Healer Tamara, would you care to join me?" Tuvok asked in his polite=20
voice. "I have a few questions to ask of you, if you don't mind."

"Yes, Mr. Tuvok. I shall join you." Tamara responded to kindness and=20
curiosity in his voice. There was an empty table near the replicator=20
and they sat down. Tamara's back was to the door so she couldn't see=20
who was coming or going. "What kind of questions are you referring=20
too?"

"Your telepathic ability is of interest as is your healing ability.=20
That is unless discussing them makes you uncomfortable," Tuvok said=20
while she nibbled on the food in front of her.

"No, I don't mind." Tamara wiped her mouth with the napkin. "I can=20
read, send, receive and shield against thoughts. The healing involves=20
mostly wounds; I've never really tried healing illness. The Royal=20
Family kept a tight rein on my healing activities when they could."

"I see. Could you elaborate more, please?" Tuvok was intrigued and=20
his suspicious of her eased a little.

Tuvok and Tamara left the mess hall at the same time through the far=20
doors when Chakotay came in the other set just missing her. Her=20
avoidance of him was making his temper short. He got a plate of food=20
and some tea to drink and sat down with B'Elanna and Harry Kim.

"Hey, Chakotay! I thought you and the Healer were doing something=20
this afternoon?" B'Elanna said noting the tension in his face, but=20
ignoring it.

"I thought so too. She's avoiding me, right now." Chakotay stabbed=20
the veggies on his plate.

"She was just in here, Commander." Harry put forth. "She was having=20
lunch with Tuvok and they were intent on their conversation."

"Any idea what it was about?" Chakotay asked relieved that least she=20
was okay.

"What's bothering you, Chakotay?" B'Elanna asked knowing she was one=20
of the few people who knew Chakotay very well. B'Elanna wasn't very=20
happy about Healer Tamara being on Voyager granted she was pregnant=20
with his twins. She thought Janeway and Chakotay belonged together=20
and resented the Healer very much.

"Tam is driving me crazy with her recent behavior. Ever since we've=20
been on board Voyager, she's turning into a different person," he=20
admitted to B'Elanna after Harry had left to go back to the bridge.

"You're the counselor, Chakotay. Talk to her." B'Elanna=20
suggested. "She has gotten under your skin, hasn't she?" You're in=20
love with her, aren't you?"

"Yes, B'El. I love her. She's kind and gentle yet fierce and loving=20
and has one of the most intuitive minds I've ever known."

"So why is she driving you crazy today?" B'Elanna asked curious=20
seeing that Chakotay was head over heels in love with the Healer.

"Tam knew the pilot of the yacht and was really friendly with him. I=20
got jealous and she picked up on it which is why she's avoiding me."=20
He admitted rather shamefully.=20

"Sounds like she'll be round when she's ready to face you and not=20
before, so don't go chasing her." B'Elanna advised.

"I got the feeling that you didn't like her?" He asked.
"I never said that, however I'm starting to respect her skills as a=20
trader seeing all the supplies she has acquired for Voyager including=20
some very edible looking food," she admitted.

He snorted in amusement and felt hungry enough to eat his lunch.

"So how are you and Tom doing these days?" Chakotay asked.

"We're working things out pretty good."

"Tuvok, you follow the way of logic, right?" Tamara asked as they=20
walked down the corridor.

"Yes, that is the Vulcan way." His curiosity was piqued.

"After things have settled down for me, could you show me your way? I=20
don't presume to follow it, but some aspects may bring peace to the=20
chaos in my mind," Tamara asked.

"I will consider your request, Tamara. Have a pleasant afternoon," he=20
continued on down the corridor.

"Thank you, Mr. Tuvok." She entered her quarters feeling more at=20
peace and thinking a little more logical. Yawning and stretching, she=20
sat on the couch, kicked off her shoes, dimmed the lights and curled=20
up for a nap.

Chakotay entered there darken quarters and stopped just inside the=20
doorway while his eyes adjusted. She was asleep on the couch curled=20
on her side with one arm under the pillow and the other curled around=20
her bulging belly in a protective gesture. Motherhood was making her=20
glow. He took a step towards her and remembered his behavior earlier=20
that day and he felt ashamed and remorseful, wondering how to=20
apologize to her.

Sensing his nearness, she awoke and watched the play of emotions=20
cross his face as he came over to the side of the couch and knelt on=20
the carpet beside her. He reached out to touch her face and=20
hesitated. She opened her eyes and watched his indecision as his eyes=20
travel to her abdomen. There was a lot of tension packed in his=20
stocky body.

"Hey, handsome," Tamara said hopeful that a light tone would ease his=20
tension before he hurt himself.

Chakotay relaxed part way. "We need to talk, Tam."

"Talk about your behavior towards my friend and student, Pilot=20
LeeRon? You owe me an apology; I haven't been that embarrassed in=20
years, Commander. Plus the constant hovering like I'm a child who=20
needs to be monitored." Tamara said quietly, keeping her emotions=20
locked down.

"Yes, I know," he couldn't face her accusing eyes so he looked down=20
where his children were residing. "May I ask why you were avoiding me=20
earlier?"

"Because I was angry and all I wanted to do was figure out a way to=20
put you over my knee and paddle your ass till you begged for my=20
forgiveness. My father was a great believer in discipline and so am=20
I," she confessed.

"I never knew that," he attempted to smile, but saw she wasn't in the=20
mood for it.

"There are a lot of things you don't know about me, Commander,"=20
Tamara sat up on the couch. "I like to have control once in awhile. I=20
have a dominant side that likes to get out once in a while and my=20
threat to take you over my knee is real."

She had his attention and his interest. "I like it when your=20
curiosity is up." Tamara moved to a sitting position on the couch=20
while he remained kneeling in front of her with his eyes=20
downcast. "What do you want, Chakotay?"

"I don't know," he answered in fear of losing his control. "This is=20
something I have to think about, Tam."

"You do that while I get back to work," she stood up a little=20
awkwardly and his eyes burned with desire and guilt for her as he=20
looked up at her rounded belly holding his children and his heart=20
lurched with love tightening his chest.

"Please," he whispered grabbing her hand and pressing it to his=20
lips. "Don't go."

Tamara asked the question again, "What do you want, Chakotay?" She=20
had to refrain from touching him she wanted him badly. He was already=20
giving over control to her he just didn't realize it yet.

"You. I want you." He whispered feverishly. "I owe you an apology=20
your way for my behavior this morning and the last few days."

"Anything I ask?" Tamara could hardly believe. His guilt must be=20
egging him on, so be it and sheer curiosity.

"Anything, Tam." His uniform seemed too tight and uncomfortable.

"Engage privacy mode and sound proofing, Chakotay." Tamara removed=20
her hand from his gasp and stepped away from him.

"Computer, engage privacy mode and soundproofing authorization=20
Chakotay Beta 67."
"Remove all your clothes and remain where you are. I need to take=20
care of something." Tamara headed for their bedroom for a couple of=20
items. She took the hairbrush from the dresser, the dermal=20
regenerator from the med kit and some lotion.

Returning to their living room, she found him naked kneeling on the=20
floor beside the couch his eyes downcast and his uniform folded=20
neatly on the table. His face was an open book as his emotions played=20
havoc on his inner person. Chakotay was frozen with desire to stay=20
and do his apology Tamara's way or run for the door.

Tamara stopped inside the living room and gazed at the sight in front=20
of her. His magnificent body kneeling there took her breath away and=20
it took her a moment to remember to breathe. Going over to the couch,=20
she allowed herself to run her fingers through his thick silky hair.=20
He leaned into her caress surprising himself with his willingness to=20
go along with her game.

Seating herself in the center of the couch, she settled her items=20
among the cushions. She put a small pillow behind her lower back for=20
support and leaned back making her comfortable. Sensing his=20
curiosity, she could see his dark eyes watching her from a side view=20
and he was getting aroused. Good, that meant less blood to the brain=20
to let him think.

"Look at me, handsome." She commanded.

Chakotay looked up at her with some trepidation. "Healer?"

"I want you on the couch draped over my lap with that gorgeous ass=20
where I can get to it." Tamara requested and he complied.

Chakotay's head was by her left elbow and his legs were hung over the=20
arm of the couch while his erection was trapped between her thighs. A=20
tremor swept down his body leaving him chilled with goose bumps. He=20
cradled his head in his arms. He was starting to feel like a little=20
boy in trouble with his mother.

Placing her hand in the small of his golden back, she used her right=20
hand to explore the two round globes in her lap. He tensed but soon=20
relaxed as she massaged his ass apparently in no hurry to punish him=20
just enjoying his humiliation. Her thighs felt good to his hard staff=20
sending stabs of desire through him.

Smack! Came the first stinging blow from her hairbrush that he didn't=20
know she had brought out with her and a red mark appeared on his skin=20
as he yelped in surprise and jumped. She pushed him back down.

"Lie still, handsome. If you come off my lap, I will add fifteen more=20
to my private count." She smacked him some more using the hairbrush.=20

He grunted in reply and gritted his teeth as the silver hairbrush=20
descended again and again. Her hand in the small of his back reminded=20
him to stay still. The pain made him flinch with each blow and his=20
cock to rub against her thighs. He lost count of the smacks and was=20
very much aware of how painful his rear was and yet there was=20
pleasure as his cock got harder and his tension towards climax began=20
to build.

Tamara stopped when she felt him close to coming on her lap. His face=20
was buried in the cushions. Using the bristles on the brush she=20
brushed the raw skin on his behind and was rewarded with a sharp hiss=20
of pain. She examined his buttocks for any major damage and found=20
only one welt broken open.=20

Exchanging the hairbrush for the dermal regenerator, she healed the=20
worst of welts, but did nothing for the pain he was in. Putting=20
lotion on her hand, she began to massage him again ignoring his=20
hisses of pain.

He could feel the heat from his ass cooling as Tamara rubbed the=20
cream over the welts. Restless, he moved around and was rewarded with=20
a hard slap to his already sore butt.

"Stop moving, I'm not done with you," Tamara waited for him to settle=20
down by slipping a finger into his anus. He nearly came off the=20
couch. "Take me to the bedroom, handsome. I want to have my way with=20
you."

He did.

************=09
It was hard for Chakotay to sit still in his chair on the bridge the=20
next morning. He squirmed on his sore backside, flushing when he=20
noticed Janeway lifting an eyebrow at his behavior.

"Everything alright, Commander?" Kathryn asked grinning at his=20
discomfort. She'd heard about his jealous act from Tom Paris=20
yesterday and remembered Tamara threatening to take him over her=20
knees on more than one occasion.

"Fine, Captain. Everything is fine," Chakotay plainly embarrassed and=20
stuck his nose in his PADD.

Voyager left Rashela.

Tamara was busy with Neelix as they inventoried supplies most of the=20
morning stopping when she got hungry. Leaving Neelix to finish up,=20
she headed for the shuttle bay to get another look at the yacht. She=20
became engrossed in exploring and tinkering with the ship that she=20
forgot about the time.

"Chakotay to Tamara."

"This is Tamara." She jumped, banged her head on the console and felt=20
warm sticky blood flowing down the side of her face.

"Are you coming home for dinner?"

"Yeah. Be there in a few," as soon as I stop by sickbay and get this=20
cut fixed she thought to herself. If she told him about the cut, he=20
would only get worried and end up hovering all evening.

"Please state the nature of the medical emergency." The EMH activated=20
when Tamara entered the sickbay.

"Hi, Doctor. Bad cut on forehead. Getting a headache," Tamara replied=20
as she seated herself on the nearest bio bed.

"I can see that, Tamara. How did you get cut?" The Doctor asked as he=20
ran the dermal regenerator over her forehead.

"Banged my head on the console. I'm still trying to get use to this=20
com badge thing." Tamara grinned. "So will I live?"

"Unfortunately yes. Why didn't you just heal yourself?" He ran the=20
tricorder over her.

"As my pregnancy advances, more and more resources are going to the=20
twin's growth and the healing talent is suppressed as that uses a lot=20
of energy. It happened while I was pregnant with Kathryn." She=20
explained.

"You are fine, Tamara." He put the tricorder down. "Have you thought=20
about what you are going to do with your time on Voyager?"

"It's been on my mind, Doc. I just haven't been doing any serious=20
thinking about it yet. Why?" She cocked an eyebrow at him.

"I'd like to offer you a position as a medic if you like. Think about=20
it." He offered.

Tamara slid off the bed. "I'll consider it, Doctor. Thank you."

She entered their quarters and found it lit only by candles placed at=20
strategic locations throughout the living area. The dining table was=20
set for two.
"You're late," Chakotay said coming out of the bedroom. He had=20
changed into soft black pants and a white silk shirt that left open=20
nearly to his waist.

"I'm hungry." Tamara snorted and grinned, as he came over and hugged=20
her. I could stay in these arms nice and safe forever. "I had to stop=20
at Sick Bay for a moment and see the Doc."

"Is everything all right?" Chakotay became quite concerned.

"I banged my head on the console and had the Doctor fix it. Just a=20
cut, Chakotay. Stop worrying." Tamara could see him drawing the frown=20
lines on his face. Reaching her arms around his waist, she gently=20
squeezed his buns. He flinched and she pinched.

"Tam!" He exclaimed. She had his undivided attention.

"I am fine, Chakotay and I am hungry," she said seriously. "What is=20
for dinner?"

"Tuna noodle casserole, fruit and salad," he started to nibble on her=20
ear and she leaned into his embrace desire growing.

Her stomach growled rather loudly.

"Let's eat," he took over to the table and sat her down.

"What was this for, handsome?" Tamara asked relaxing against his=20
chest with his arms wrapped around rubbing her stomach in circles=20
communing with the children.

"The way I wanted to apologize for yesterday." He said resting his=20
chin on top of her head.

"I like it both ways. By the way, the EMH offered me a position as a=20
medic in Sick Bay if I was looking for a job." Tamara said as she=20
started to inspect her nails.

"What did you say?" He asked.

"I'd think about it. I think we all need to get settled in before we=20
tackle any new projects," Tamara closed her eyes starting to relax.

"Good thinking. I don't want you to overdo it. As First Officer, I=20
would have to approve the position and your qualifications for the=20
job." He chuckled.

"I'll worry about it later. I think I can bribe the First Officer=20
since I know him fairly well." Tamara turned her head on his chest=20
and caught his nipple in her teeth and chewed softly on it. Chakotay=20
gasped in sudden arousal and nearly came off the couch.

"Easy, handsome." Tamara smiled wickedly as she got up off the=20
couch. "Care to join me?"

"Absolutely."

************
Voyager continued on course for the Alpha Quadrant and the crew=20
slowly became accustom to her newest crewmembers and the return of=20
Commander Chakotay as First Officer. Healer Tamara settled in and=20
starting working half-days in Sick Bay learning the 24th century way=20
of 1st aid and refreshing her field skills as well as general medical=20
knowledge. Cat and Naomi became the best of friends and along with=20
Andy took classes and got into trouble together.

Tamara spent a couple hours every couple days on the holodeck doing=20
flight simulations and every other pilot training she could get away=20
with. Chakotay nearly passed out the first time he came to the=20
holodeck and found her riding horseback running breakneck speed=20
across a grassy plain. They compromised on that program, she could do=20
up to an easy lope until before the twins were born and he would let=20
her continue with the flight simulations.

Tamara encouraged Chakotay to renew his friendship with Kathryn. She=20
had missed him terribly and was still blaming herself for his=20
capture. So he began having lunch or dinner with the Captain a couple=20
of times a week. Soon their friendship was strong again and Tamara=20
smiled in the background seeing them together.

The space yacht was repainted a metallic black and given a new name.=20
The Myron Horiatio Leroy Seymour Junior was christened with the=20
nickname of Seymour for short.
=20
"It's an old family joke. Whenever anyone was pregnant and looking at=20
names, I would suggest this. We considered anyone who would name a=20
kid with something like this as someone to be shot. Someone with a=20
name like Myron or Seymour usually got beat up in school. Hence the=20
joke lives on," Tamara explained to Chakotay and Kathryn over supper.=20
They laughed.

A lot of the crew was surprised at the deep friendship that was=20
developing between the Healer and Seven of Nine. No one saw that they=20
had anything in common except for their Borg implants. Truth was=20
Seven still missed the Collective in her mind and Tamara wanted to=20
learn more about the Borg since the technology was also in her head=20
and gave Seven some company in her mind at the same time.
Captain Janeway and Chakotay had nearly panicked when they came into=20
Cargo Bay Two and found the pair in a mind link. They were sharing=20
memories of the Healer's childhood and Seven's experiences with the=20
Collective. Becoming aware of the senior officers worrying about=20
them, Tamara reluctantly withdrew from Seven's orderly and lovely=20
mind.

"Later, darling." Tamara smiled as she left the cargo bay.

"Are you alright, Seven?" Janeway asked.

"Fascinating mind," Seven mused for a moment.

Chakotay grinned.

Tom knew that Chakotay had developed feelings for the Healer during=20
the time he was on Rashela, but he hadn't figured on her turning up=20
pregnant. Knowing that the Commander would devote his life to Tamara=20
and the babies she carried, he kept his silence. He had been in the=20
back of Sickbay when Captain Janeway learned of the upcoming children.

He watched the Healer whenever she was near him to see what her=20
feelings for Chakotay were. Tamara was also aware of his scrutiny and=20
found it amusing to a point. She was aware that Chakotay had feelings=20
for the pilot, but had never acted on them as he had had his heart of=20
Captain Janeway for a long time. What a tangle she had wandered into,=20
she mused.

And than there was B'Elanna Torres, the half-Klingon human hybrid,=20
Chief Engineer, in love with Thomas Paris. Tom loved her very much,=20
but still avoided any kind of commitment at the moment so the Healer=20
decided it was time to step in.

Tamara felt like she was back home when she stepped into Sandrine's=20
on the holodeck. Sitting at a table, she ordered a mug of beer and=20
sat back watching Tom and Harry play pool. Chakotay was working late=20
and Cat was out with Naomi in Astrometrics and Seven of Nine.

"I gotta go, Tom. Got the early shift tomorrow," Harry said laying=20
his cue down.

"Come on, Harry. One more game." Tom pleaded.

"Sorry, Tom. I need some sleep. See you tomorrow." Harry said as he=20
left the holodeck.

"Yeah, night Harry." Tom racked the balls and noticed Tamara sitting=20
alone at a nearby table. `I wonder why she's not with Chakotay like=20
always.' His curiosity got the better of him.
"Isn't alcohol bad for a pregnancy, Healer?"

Tamara looked up and found Tom Paris standing next to her table while=20
she defiantly took another swallow of beer.

"Hello, Mr. Paris. One beer is not going to hurt anything." She=20
smiled at the pilot. "Is there something you want?"

"May I join you or are you waiting for Chakotay?" He returned the=20
smile and saw her face light up in enjoyment with those sparkling=20
green eyes.

"Have a seat. Chakotay is working late. I heard about Sandrine's and=20
thought I would check it out."

"What do you think?" Tom beamed with pride in his creation.

"Reminds me of home. I like it." She took a swallow of her drink and=20
regarded the pilot thoughtfully. "So how are you and B'Elanna doing=20
these days?"

"We're fine. Everyone is wondering when you and the Commander are=20
going to get married?" He asked wearing his most charming smile.

Her vision dimmed and suddenly she was in a Jeffries Tube watching an=20
explosion and two bodies flung back against the closed-door hatch.=20
Hearing screams of pain and suffering, she tried to go help them as=20
her vision returned to normal and realized that the screams were her=20
own. Shaking with fright, she felt arms encircle her cold body as she=20
began to cry.

`My daughter, it is not yet time for the joining. You must wait a=20
while longer,' a gentle wise voice spoke in her mind. `The cleansing=20
is not yet finished.'

There was a hiss of a hypo spray against her neck and darkness=20
claimed her.

"Paris, what happened to Tam?" She could hear the worry in Chakotay's=20
voice and they seemed to be in Sickbay now.

"I don't know. We were talking at Sandrine's when she like zoned out=20
for a couple of minutes. Than she screamed and passed out." Tom=20
explained as he stepped back from the Healer's side when he noticed=20
the look on Chakotay's face.

"Did she say anything?" Chakotay asked he smoothed her hair back and=20
noted no sign of any injuries on her body.

"No, not a word, Chakotay," Tom answered. "Has this happened before?"
The Doctor was on an away mission with Captain Janeway and Neelix so=20
Tom played medic and grabbed the medical tricorder to scan the=20
Healer. She seemed to be fine, just asleep.

"Tamara has visions on occasion." Chakotay explained.

"Is she always affected by them like this?" He finished his scan=20
satisfied with the readings.

"I don't know. She hasn't had one that I know of for quite awhile."=20
He leaned over and kissed her forehead.

Tom could see the devotion and love in the First Officer's dark eyes=20
for the woman on the bio-bed. He loved B'Elanna very much, but not=20
with the intensity these two had for each other. Seeing their love=20
made him determined to make things work with B'Elanna.

Catching his resolve about the engineer, Tamara smiled to herself=20
knowing that she had accomplished her objective. However, the vision=20
bothered her because she couldn't see who the people were in the=20
explosion and fire. She knew it was at least one male and one female;=20
maybe meditation could help her with this.

"I'd like her to stay here until she wakes up, Commander." Tom said.

"Fine. I'm not going anywhere."

Tamara woke up fully about twenty minutes later and sat up feeling=20
fine.

"What happened, Tam?" Chakotay asked full of concern as he helped her=20
off the bio-bed.

"I had a vision, Tay. Otherwise, I'm all right." She leaned into his=20
warm body still a little shaky.

"What happened in the vision?" Tom prompted, curious to know.

"I'm not sure. Some meditation may help me with it. This one was not=20
clear like others in the past. Can we go home?" She sounded like a=20
scared little girl.

"Sure, baby." And they left Sickbay leaving a baffled medic behind=20
them.

Five months later after her arrival on Voyager=85

With her telepathic and empathic skills, people began coming to her=20
with problems or she would end up seeking them out to see if she=20
could help. The one person she really wanted to get to know and help=20
kept her barriers up and they remained acquaintances, but Tamara was=20
patient.

The opportunity arose soon after B'Elanna and the other female=20
members of Voyager held a surprise baby shower for Tamara. A couple=20
of the male senior staff managed to slip a couple of nasty gag gifts=20
into the pile of presents. Tamara and B'Elanna vowed revenge, which=20
made Kathryn smile.

************
End of Part Seven
************


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************
Part Eight
************

"Chakotay, do you have any plans for tonight?" Tom Paris asked as=20
their shift ended on the bridge.=20

"I was going to stay with Tamara." Chakotay said, as he grew=20
suspicious. "Why?"
=09
"A few of us were arranging a baby shower for the father. All you=20
have to do is show up at Sandrine's at 2000 hours." Tom explained as=20
they entered the turbo lift.

"And whose idea was this?" He asked.

"It was Tam's idea. With the twins due in a few days, she felt you=20
needed one last night out with the boys." Tom grinned and Chakotay=20
felt himself warming up to the idea. "Deck Five. She's taking the=20
Doctor's shift in Sickbay so he can come."

"What's this about a baby shower for the father?" Chakotay asked as=20
he entered the quarters they shared trying to sound mad, but smiling=20
when he found her lying on the couch waking up from a nap. She had=20
absolutely bloomed with the pregnancy and was due any day or time now.

"I see Tom told you already. I think I'll rearrange the betting pool=20
again." She replied as he came over and kissed her while rubbing her=20
stomach.

"Are you trying to get rid of me?"

"Yes, you've been hovering and I just want a little quiet time and=20
give you some fun before the twins get here and we'll have no time=20
for quite awhile." She answered rubbing her eyes and saw the concern=20
in his dark eyes. "I'm fine, Chakotay. I still have a few things to=20
think over and I can get some work done in Sickbay."

"Things you can't talk over with me?" He sounded hurt when he was so=20
open with her.

"That's not fair. You know I take my time thinking about different=20
things. In a day or so I'll share. So please go and have some fun.=20
I'll be in Sickbay if anything like labor starts."  She smiled at=20
him. "It will be good for morale."

"Witch," he growled and kissed her. "I better go change before I get=20
distracted."

"Oh, like you can find anything sexy with me looking like a whale.=20
Help me up since this was your entire fault." Laughing, she held out=20
her hand and chuckling in return as he helped her off the cough.

"If I recall correctly, you were also present when this happened."

Sickbay was absolutely quiet and Tamara loved it as she got some of=20
her work caught up. One person came in with a busted finger and left=20
again. Checking the betting pool, she noticed bets were being placed=20
on who was going to get the most bombed since real liquor was being=20
served at Sandrine's. She started betting odds that one or more would=20
end up in the brig before the twins came.

"What's so amusing, Tamara?" Janeway asked when she saw the smile on=20
the pregnant woman.

"The betting pool, Captain. They are laying odds on who will get the=20
most drunk tonight. They are serving real alcohol and I'm hoping for=20
a few major hangovers in the morning in revenge for the gag gifts at=20
the shower last week." Tamara had a wicked smile on her face.

Kathryn chuckled.

"Is there something I can do for you, Captain? Can't sleep again?"=20
Picking up a medical tricorder, she took some readings on the=20
Captain. "When was the last time you ate, Kathryn?"

"You are starting to sound like the Doctor. I've got a knot in my=20
shoulder and I was hoping you could do something for it, Tamara." She=20
rubbed the shoulder in question. "And please call me Kathryn more=20
often."

"Pull up the other chair, Kathryn and let me rub that knot for you."=20
She replaced the tricorder on the counter and rubbed her hands=20
together to warm them swinging her chair around so she could get at=20
Kathryn's back.
"I hear the party was your idea," Kathryn commented as she sat on the=20
stool in front of the healer.

"Well, I wanted some down time to think and if I stayed in quarters=20
Chakotay would hover over me so I came up with the party and gave it=20
to Tom and Neelix. First, to distract Chakotay and let him relax and=20
it's good for morale. Second, I can get some thinking done and some=20
work caught up." Her hands were working on the knots in Kathryn's=20
shoulder and she extended her healing sense for relaxation into the=20
knot.

"And third." Kathryn quipped.

"Getting even time with major hangovers in the morning if we were in=20
the 20th century, but here we have cure-alls." She could feel the=20
captain relaxing under the massage as muscles loosened. "What is=20
keeping you awake, Kathryn?"

The twins kicked and Tamara drew in a sharp breath. Kathryn spun=20
around in alarm. "What is it?"

"They're kicking." Tamara had her hand on her bulging middle feeling=20
the flutters. She took Kathryn's hand and placed it where she could=20
feel the twins kicking also. A look of sheer delight spread over her=20
face.=20

"They are very active today, aren't they?" Her blue-grey eyes met=20
Tamara's green ones and saw the love and compassion in them.

"Yes and I hope they will be bothering their god-mother soon if=20
she'll say yes. Please, Kathryn. Chakotay is your best friend and I=20
would like us to be friends also." There were tears in her=20
eyes. "Damn hormones."

A look of surprise joined the delight on her face; "I would be=20
honored. Thank-you."

"Now that that is settled, let's get back to your massage." Tamara=20
started in on Kathryn's back once again. She could feel the captain=20
sigh and relax under her skillful hands.

"Oh, that feels good. Too much longer and I may go to sleep under=20
your hands, Tamara." She purred.

"Well, its not like there is a shortage of beds around here or do a=20
site to site transport." Tamara laughed. "Maybe I should program a=20
massage parlor in the holodeck with some sexy attendants."

"I don't think so, Tamara."
"It was just a thought." She reached over and turned on the viewer.=20
It showed the inside of Sandrine's on the holodeck. The party was in=20
full swing.

"Are you keeping tabs on the party goers?" Kathryn asked looking over=20
her shoulder at the scene.

"Yeah, I want to make sure no one gets alcohol poisoning even if the=20
doctor is present." She giggled as Chakotay wobbled slightly on his=20
way up to the bar. He had baby shoes pinned to his shirt. "Actually,=20
I'm in the mood for a little revenge."

"Against whom?" Kathryn grinned as she could see the beginnings of a=20
plan forming in Tamara's eye.

"The big guy and flyboy for the gags at the baby shower, but we need=20
B'Elanna for the timing." She checked the betting pool and found=20
takers on her brig bet. "Sickbay to Lt. Torres."

"Torres here. What can I do for you, Tamara?" The half-Klingon=20
engineer answered.

"Can you come down to Sickbay for a few minutes; I have something to=20
ask you?" Tamara replied. "It involves a big guy, a flyboy and gags=20
at a baby shower."

"Now I'm intrigued. Be right there. Torres out."

"What are you up too?" Kathryn's curiosity was up. "What is in the=20
betting pool right now?"

"I'm taking odds that Chakotay and Paris end up in the brig before=20
the twins come. And tonight seems like the perfect time to do it,"=20
Tamara crooned as she entered the names onto the bet and changed the=20
odds.

"On what charge?"

"Who said anything about charges? I simply said land in the brig."=20
She said as she changed her bet on the day and time of the twin's=20
arrival using Chakotay's name.

"What about the brig?"  B'Elanna questioned as she entered Sickbay.

"I say if they are drunk enough we transport them to the brig when=20
they are asleep or passed out minus their clothes." Tamara=20
explained. "Let them sleep it off till they wake up and see what=20
happens."

"I like it. Let's go for it." Both agreed. Kathryn cleared it with=20
Tuvok.
All three were giggling when the EMH returned to Sickbay.

************
With the hallway swaying in his vision, it took Chakotay three tries=20
to open the door to his quarters and stagger in. Tamara was asleep in=20
the bed or appeared to be asleep to Chakotay. She was watching him=20
through slitted eyes as he got undressed down to his black silk=20
boxers and neatly fell into bed. He attempted to hug her and she=20
brushed him off snarling at him. Rolling over, he went to sleep.

Tamara waited until she was absolutely sure he was asleep and got up=20
from the bed slowly with her awkward girth. Softly, she slipped his=20
boxers off and wrapped a light sheet around his waist while=20
activating the pre-programmed site to site transportation. After=20
Chakotay dissolved in a shower of blue shimmers, Tamara waddled to=20
the couch and fell back asleep with a smile.=20

A few doors down, B'Elanna also fell back asleep with a smile.

************
Captain Janeway, Lt. Torres and Healer Tamara stood outside the=20
containment field in the brig watching Chakotay and Paris slowly stir=20
awake. Chakotay didn't stir fast enough for Tamara.

"Plug your ears, ladies." Tamara said as she placed two fingers=20
between her lips and the old "Hey taxi" piercing whistle shattered=20
the stillness of the room and somewhat down the hallway and a floor=20
up or down.

The ladies barely had time to cover their ears, while both men sat=20
straight up and grabbed their heads as lances of pain shot through=20
them and moaned in misery.

"Where did you learn to do that, Tamara?" B'Elanna asked with a smile=20
at Tom's suffering.

"Twentieth century New York City. The only way to hail a cab." Tamara=20
was clearly enjoying Chakotay's discomfort.

"I'm enjoying this." Janeway smirked.

They watched as both men slowly began to realize where they were. In=20
the brig, behind a containment field with only a light sheet covering=20
them. Tom squinted at the sight of three angry women in front of him.

"Ah, Chakotay. I think we are in big trouble." Tom said grabbing the=20
sheet to cover himself blushing from head to foot.

"What do you mean?" Chakotay lifted his arm to block the bright light=20
of the brig. Than he saw what Tom meant when he saw the Captain,=20
B'Elanna and Tamara glaring at him with angry looks and arms crossed.=20
Definitely in trouble, he thought time for a smile and turn on the=20
famous Chakotay charm with his dimples. What exactly had he done last=20
night that made him land in trouble? He couldn't remember.=20

He tried to smile, but felt the pain instead. "What did we do last=20
night?" The sheet slipped and Chakotay made a quick grab for it.

"That's a good one, Commander.  You're in the brig and now you claim=20
not to remember what happened that brought you here." Captain Janeway=20
rolled her eyes. "I don't believe this."

"B'Elanna, what did I do?" Tom questioned but B'Elanna ignored him.

"Conference, ladies." Tamara gestured for them to come over to one=20
side of the room. When they were together, "I hate to break this up,=20
but I'm having a contraction. I suggest we send them back to quarters=20
so they can get dressed and join us in Sickbay."

"How do you want to do this?" Kathryn asked. "This is your plan."

"Just follow my lead, ladies and we'll sail out of this for the time=20
being." Tamara winked at them as her backache increased.=20

"Why are we here?" Chakotay repeated his questions through his=20
muddled headache.

"Yeah and how long do we have to stay here," Tom complained grabbing=20
the sheet as it slipped off once again.

"You came home drunk last night." Tamara snapped and slowly left the=20
room as she felt some pain in her lower abdomen.

"Tamara," he called after her, but she ignored him as another pain=20
rippled across her belly. It was a second contraction.

"Oh, ahhhh!" She gripped her stomach and bent over. "Chakotay!"

"Captain, her labor's starting." B'Elanna stated when she heard the=20
cry of pain.

Kathryn nodded as she and B'Elanna raced over to the healer. "Ensign,=20
do a site to site for Paris and Chakotay back to their quarters."

"Come on, Tamara. Let's get you to sickbay." They each put an arm=20
around Tamara and helped her down the corridor while the men were=20
transported back to their quarters.
By the time, the women arrived at sickbay; Chakotay came around the=20
corner, out of breath, but had some clothes on. Without a word, he=20
scooped Tamara up in his arms and carried her into Sickbay. She put=20
her arms around his neck.

"Chakotay." She buried her head in his chest while he laid her on the=20
bio bed in the corner of Sickbay that had been set up as a birthing=20
area complete with privacy screen.

"Shhhh, Tam. You'll be fine." He held her close.

"Chakotay, I'm sorry." She whispered in his neck. He could feel hot=20
tears slipping from her eyes onto his neck.

"Tam, what is it? What's wrong?" He grew concerned. She didn't get a=20
chance to answer as another contraction hit and she groaned.

"I see you are ready for delivery, Tamara." The Doctor said as he ran=20
the tricorder over her. "Everything is proceeding nicely although=20
your blood pressure is up a little high for my liking. I'll prepare a=20
hypo for that."

"How are the twins, Doctor?" Chakotay ask as he rubbed Tam's lower=20
back.

"They are doing nicely. Most of the work is now up to Tamara," The=20
EMH stated as he prepared the end of the bed for the anticipated=20
arrival. "Sickbay to Lt. Paris."

"Paris here, Doctor." The helmsman answered.

"I need some assistance, Mr. Paris." Doc said as he injected Tamara=20
with the hypo. She was groaning loudly with the contraction.

"Kathryn," Tamara groaned. She and B'Elanna peeked around the screen.

"Is there anything we can do?" Kathryn asked watching the couple. A=20
thought hit her; this should've been Chakotay and I. She was a little=20
jealous.

"Cat will need someone to tell her, please." Tam gave a loud=20
groan. "Sorry about spoiling the brig joke. Maybe next time." She=20
managed a weak smile.

"We'll take care of Cat and see you both later." Kathryn=20
smiled. "We'll finish that on another day."

"What brig joke?" Chakotay asked astonished. "You mean the whole=20
thing was a joke? I really thought I was in trouble."

The contraction eased and Tam lay back down while he wiped her=20
forehead. "Yes, it was a joke or getting even after the gag gifts=20
during the baby shower."

"I did come home a little tipsy," he grinned at her flashing his=20
dimples. For once, they didn't faze the healer.

"You were so asleep you didn't even feel me taking off your black=20
silk boxers," she snorted. "I won the bet, didn't I, Doctor?"

"As a matter of fact, you did. People want to know on what charge?"=20
He quipped as he finished checking the readouts of the two=20
incubators.=20

"I never said there would be any charges, I just said I could get=20
Paris and Chakotay thrown in the brig before the twins came." The=20
monitor let them know that another contraction was starting.

"So I hear." Paris interjected as he came around the privacy=20
screen. "Nice bet, Tamara. You really cleaned up on that one."

"Aye, Mr. Paris, please keep an eye on Tamara's readings. They are=20
still higher than I would like to see." Doc thrust a tricorder into=20
the blond helmsman hands.=20

"Ahhhh, bushwa! Make it stop." She squeezed Chakotay's hands as hard=20
as she could. Her water broke and the Doctor cleaned her up without a=20
fuss. Chakotay was patient and calm in Tamara's storm of fury by=20
rubbing her back, letting her squeeze his hands during the height of=20
her pain, wiping her face and giving her words of comfort. Sickbay=20
was treated to some rather interesting expletives despite the fact=20
some of it hadn't been heard in nearly four centuries.

Several hours went by and tension grew on the ship as everyone=20
awaited the arrival of the newest additions to the ship's population.=20
Tamara had become quite popular with the crew during the few short=20
months she had been on board. Evening came and went with little=20
change and by morning the following day; the Doctor and Tom were=20
having their worries as Tamara's energy flagged from pushing.

"Chakotay." Tamara, clearly exhausted, looked up into his dark eyes=20
full of love and concern. "I can't do this anymore. I wanted too."

"That's okay, dear heart. It's okay. You tried," he brushed her limp=20
hair back from her eyes and kissed her forehead.

"Chakotay," Tamara whispered as she felt another contraction coming=20
on plus a different kind of pain and knew what it entailed. "I'm=20
sorry that I'm not worthy enough to be your mate. Goodbye, my love."
A sharp pain lanced through her head killing her instantly. Every=20
alarm in the place went off as she relaxed dead weight in Chakotay's=20
arms.

"Doc, she's crashing." Paris yelled.

"Cortical stimulators, Mr. Paris."

Tom grabbed the stimulators and placed them on Tamara's forehead and=20
than lowered the bed down straight. He had to literally push a=20
stunned Chakotay out of the way while getting Tamara on full life=20
support.

"Computer, initiate fetal transport on male child into incubator=20
one." The Doctor said calmly. Chakotay's son appeared in the=20
incubator next to him, but his eyes were on Tamara's still=20
form.  "Initiate fetal transport on female child into incubator=20
two."  A moment later, Tamara's daughter was in the second incubator.

"What happened to Tamara, Doctor?" Chakotay nearly roared and both=20
babies began to cry.

Running the tricorder over her still form, he detected the=20
cause. "Aneurysm. A blood vessel burst in her brain. If I can repair=20
it quickly, we have a good chance of getting her back. I've put her=20
on total life support, now go tend to your children while I try and=20
save their mother."

Tom pushed the incubators out of the corner and Chakotay with them=20
into the other side of Sickbay. Another medic came forward and began=20
to clean the little ones up and make them comfortable. The medic was=20
finished in just a few minutes. The only sounds were coming from=20
behind the screen and that wasn't giving Chakotay any clues on=20
Tamara's condition.=20

The babies soft crying caught his attention and it dawned on him that=20
he was a father now. He picked up his son up and was amazed by the=20
tiny form and the amount of love in his heart. His son burbled=20
happily in his arms while his daughter fussed in her incubator. He=20
pictured his Tam standing over them with a baby in her arms and a=20
look of contentment on her lovely face. To his surprise, he felt=20
tears sliding down his face as he realized how empty his life would=20
be without her. She was the peace in his soul and he needed to tell=20
her.

Her last words tore at his heart, "I'm sorry that I'm not worthy=20
enough to be your mate."

He picked up his daughter and fell in love all over again, looking=20
like her mother. Holding both babies, he let his tears fall while=20
waiting.

"Chakotay."

"Chakotay." The voice was insistent.

"What?" He raised his tear stained eyes up to see Kathryn standing=20
before him. "Captain."

"Chakotay, what's wrong? Did something happen to Tamara?" Janeway=20
noted the twins asleep in his arms.

"The babies are fine. Tamara had an aneurysm. Doc and Paris are=20
working on her now." With Kathryn's help, they placed the babies back=20
into their incubators.

"Kathryn, I need to tell her to come back. I can't do this without=20
her. I may have waited too late. She never said anything till right=20
before about you and me. She always knew one day I would have to make=20
a choice. Despite her self-doubts, Tamara would have lived with=20
either decision, her or you=85" He broke off.

"But now, Chakotay?" Kathryn prompted.

"At one time, I dreamed of you and I down the long road despite the=20
barrier you put between us. Than things changed, I was enslaved and=20
she was there and she never asked much from me. Tamara was there=20
doing everything she could to help those children and anyone else who=20
needed help. She went out of her way to help me when she didn't have=20
too like healing me and trying to make sure I was treated fairly.=20
Spirits, she stood up to the Royal Family for me in defense and=20
didn't ask for hardly anything in return. There were a few times, I=20
had to physically take her home and force her to get some rest." He=20
smiled at the memory. "She was so mad that last time, I had to sleep=20
outside for a few days until she cooled off. When I looked to the=20
future, Kathryn, I see Tam by my side. The peace that is in my soul.=20
I'm sorry, Kathryn. But I will still be your friend and be by your=20
side as I promised to help you get this crew home."=20

"Go to her, Chakotay. Tell her what you told me," Kathryn said as=20
sadness and joy filled her. She would be alone as the Captain, but=20
her best friend could be happy with the healer and children.

The Doctor and Paris came out from behind the privacy screen.=20
Chakotay looked up with hope in his eyes and heart full of hope.=20
Paris looked defeated.

"Captain, Commander, she's alive and off of life support, but she's=20
in a coma." The Doctor reported. "Tamara could wake up tomorrow, next=20
week or not at all."

"What do you mean, Doctor?" Chakotay choked on his words.

"If and when she wakes up, there may be brain damage. As to the=20
extent, we won't know until she wakes up." The Doctor said as started=20
to check on the twins.

"Can I see her?" Chakotay's voice cracked with grief.

"Of course, Commander."

"Tamara," he managed to get out as a lump formed in his throat almost=20
choking him. He staggered over to the stool beside the bio bed and=20
sat down hard. She looked so peaceful, just like she was taking a nap=20
and would look at him anytime now with those green eyes full of=20
mischief and love. "Please, come back to me."

************
Tamara found herself in a forest on a bright sunny day under a blue=20
sky. Walking along, she came to a beautiful meadow filled with=20
different flowers and sweet grasses. At the far end of the meadow, a=20
red sorrel stallion grazed.

"You are so gorgeous. A fine example of excellent horseflesh." She=20
said admiring the play of muscles that rippled under the stallion's=20
hide.

"He is your guide, if you will allow it," an unexpected voice said to=20
the left of her position. Turning, she saw a silver and black furred=20
she-wolf sitting with her tongue hanging out and glowing yellow eyes.

"My guide to what? Why am I here? Where is Chakotay and the=20
children?" Tamara asked.

"Your guide who will listen and offer advice from time to time. You=20
are here to make a decision. And Chakotay will be here soon." The=20
wolf replied and than got up and left.

"Well, that was cryptic if not a little bit puzzling." Tamara=20
remarked as she started walking towards the stallion. He raised his=20
head and flared nostrils at her approach, but did not flee. "Hi,=20
handsome."

A hand on his shoulder woke him from a sound sleep and he=20
jumped. "Tam?"

"No, Chakotay. It's me." Kathryn replied. "Has there been any change?"

"It's been three days and no sign of Tam coming around." He answered=20
tired as hell and looked worn out.

"Take as much time as you need, Chakotay," Kathryn said. "I brought=20
you this. I have a feeling you need it right now to hopefully find=20
some answers. I have to go. It's my turn to watch the twins."

Chakotay looked to find his medicine bundle in his lap. Smiling, he=20
opened the bag and barely touched his akoona when his spirit guide=20
appeared to him.
"You certainly took your time getting here. She's been waiting for=20
quite some time now, but getting to know her spirit guide a little=20
too well." The wolf nuzzled his hand. "Such behavior is not=20
dignified."

Chakotay laughed. His Tam would find a way to irritate the=20
spirits. `His Tam', he called her in his thoughts and his heart=20
pounded so hard his chest hurt with the tightness. She's definitely=20
affecting me, too. The sound of hoof beats reached his ears from=20
across the meadow. Looking in the general direction of the sounds, he=20
saw a red stallion racing through the sweet grass with mane and tail=20
flying in the breeze. And clinging to his back moving as one with him=20
was Tamara laughing in pure joy and exhilaration.

Coming to a stop, Tamara jumped off his back and leaped into=20
Chakotay's arms.

"Chakotay." She squealed in delight. "What took you so long?"

"I've been a little thick-headed lately. It took a good friend to=20
point out where I could find you." Chakotay answered by kissing her=20
tenderly and hungrily. "I've missed you."

"Well, now we're together. What do we get to do first?" Tamara asked=20
as she slipped her arms around his neck.

"This is not the afterlife, Tam. It's a place of meditation and=20
spiritual guidance. You are here to make a decision. Life or death."=20
He said releasing her.

"What do you mean, Chakotay?" She looked confused.

"What is the last thing you remember before you came here, Tam?" he=20
asked.

"I was, I was giving birth to the twins and there was a flash of pain=20
in my head. The next thing I knew I was here talking to a wolf and=20
than meeting this beautiful red stallion." She related still slightly=20
confused.

"Because you had an aneurysm and died. The doctor had to do the fetal=20
transport for the twins and than operate to get you back. You have=20
been in a coma for three days now." Chakotay kissed her on the=20
forehead. "You need to decide whether to live and come back to me or=20
go on to the afterlife."

"You want me to come back to you, Chakotay? Not just because of the=20
twins or what we went through together, just me?" Her green eyes=20
searched his dark eyes intently.

"Yes, Tam. You have always been more than worthy to be my mate. I was=20
too blind to see it until now and it may be too late if you don't=20
come back." He confessed and watched her eyes fill with tears.
"What about Kathryn Janeway?" She asked.

"I waited for Kathryn for over six years, Tam. On New Earth, I hoped=20
she would respond, but she sat parameters there, too. We did form a=20
bond there of very strong friendship. When Voyager came back for us,=20
it was Captain and First Officer once again. I have vowed to stay by=20
her side until we get the crew home and I won't go back on that.=20
Sometimes I could feel her considering the prospect and I would renew=20
my hope and than she would push me away again. Protocol, I really=20
grew to hate that word. As time went on, I realized that I also=20
wanted a mate and children."

"Have you stopped waiting for her, Chakotay? Choose carefully whose=20
path you would take as mate. I can live with you and her being good=20
friends, but if you think for one moment that you would run back to=20
her because she changed her mind again, do not chose my path,=20
Chakotay." She challenged his heart.

"I chose your path, dear heart." He gathered her in his arms. "If=20
friendship is all that she can give, than I can accept that. I would=20
rather have the friendship than not know her at all"

"I would like a good friendship with her as well since she is to be=20
the godmother to the twins. I admire her and would like to get to=20
know her better."

"Are you coming back right away, Tam?"

"As soon as I can, dear heart."

Her eyelids felt heavy, but she managed to crack them a little and=20
not flinch at the dim lighting. She blinked a few times and opened=20
them fully waiting for her surroundings to come into focus. Nighttime=20
in Sickbay and someone was snoring in her right ear. Turning her=20
head, all she could see was a forehead on a stocky arm and black=20
glossy hair. His cologne told her nose immediately who it was.=20
Chakotay.

"I see you came back for the next round." Tom Paris whispered in her=20
left ear.

"Hi Tom. How long was I out?" Tamara whispered turning to look at him.

"Six days. We nearly lost you, Tam." Tom ran the scanner over her.

"Wow. Long nap. How long has Sleeping Beauty been awake?" She smiled.

"Five days. Between staying by your side and caring for the twins,=20
he's a wreck." Tom replied brushing the hair on her head back. "You=20
really scared us. I don't know what the big guy would've done if you=20
hadn't come back."

"Where are the twins now, Tom?" Tamara grew anxious.

"B'Elanna's watching them tonight." Tom answered. "Everyone has been=20
pitching in and helping with the little tykes."

"And I'll bet that Uncle Tom has been enjoying them too." Her eyelids=20
were getting heavy and Tom could see her drifting off into a natural=20
sleep.=20

"Get some sleep, Healer." He kissed her on the forehead enjoying her=20
smooth skin and scent for a brief moment.

"I like that, Tom," she whispered as she drifted off.

His neck hurt and there was numbness in his arm from his forehead=20
lying there all night.  Rubbing his neck, Chakotay stood up and=20
looked down at the sleeping woman on the bio bed in front of him. She=20
seemed more relaxed than the day before.

"Good morning, Commander," Tom Paris said coming out of the=20
office. "Did you sleep well?"

"Hi Tom. A few hours anyway. How is Tam doing?" He ran a hand down=20
her cheek.

"She woke up for a few seconds last night and than drifted off into a=20
natural sleep." Tom said as he picked up a hypo spray, adjusted the=20
medicine in it and gave Chakotay an injection in his arm. "Relax.=20
It's just a muscle relaxer."

"Why didn't you wake me when she came too?" He could feel the tense=20
muscles loosening up and he felt better.

"Like I said she was only awake for a few seconds. We spoke for a=20
moment and she drifted off. Tamara should wake up some time today."=20
Tom smiled.

"You still should've waked me up." Chakotay protested in irritation.=20

"You needed to sleep." Tom shot back.

"Shut up, both of you. How's a body supposed to get any sleep round=20
here," Tamara drawled from the bed.

"Tam!" Chakotay exclaimed and instantly enveloped her in his board=20
arms for a hug of relief. "Spirits, I've missed you."

"Shut up and kiss me, handsome," Tamara growled as she reached her=20
arms around his neck pulling him into a kiss. They melted together=20
with his tears falling onto her face for several long moments.

"Don't ever leave me, Tam, I couldn't bear it." Chakotay whispered in=20
her hair as they came up for air. "I love you and I chose your path=20
to follow as mate."

Her face lit up as joy filled her at his words. "Oh, baby. I love you=20
so much."

Tom watched their happiness with each other and with a slight sigh of=20
his own went back into the office ignoring the twinge of jealousy in=20
his gut.

`Interesting,' Tamara thought as she picked up on it.

************
End of Part Eight
************


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************
Part Ten
************

WARNING!!! ONE MAJOR CHARACTOR DEATH IN THIS CHAPTER

See Part One for disclaimer

It had taken some time for Tamara and Kathryn Janeway to make amends=20
to their friendship, even though Kathryn didn't hold it too=20
personally against the healer for her actions. She had admitted to=20
Tamara personally one night, that had their positions been reversed,=20
she'd have done the same thing. The Captain's understanding of how=20
much Tamara loved her husband, and finding a loophole that got her=20
sentence leally reduced to thirty days in the brig, ten weeks=20
community service didn't hurt any either on the path of their=20
renewal.=20

During her community work, which wasn't really any more than what she=20
usually did for the crew, Tamara attended counseling sessions with=20
Tuvok, and finally had to admit, she wasn't super human after all.=20
That all the stress and strain of being taken from her time period,=20
mutated against her will, and everything else up to this point was=20
enough to make anyone snap, and she had. She still felt guilty for=20
slapping her husband like that, even if Chakotay didn't hold it=20
against her, she still held it against herself, for she was a healer=85
but she had taken life too, and that was part of the key to her=20
struggles. She was a healer that had killed, even if it was in self=20
defense, she had taken a life=85lives, and this didn't set well with=20
her.=20

Strangely, it was during a rare moment when she broke down in her=20
husband's arms and shared this nagging thought that she gained the=20
insight she needed to heal. Tuvok had given her a lot of help in=20
dealing with the majority of things, but his `logic' just didn't cut=20
it for her when it came to this little matter; she was a healer that=20
killed, and that was that. But when her love responded by asking her,=20
did she ever take a life in cold blood, and she snapped `no', as if=20
it was a horrifying idea, it dawned on her that no, she didn't do any=20
of it to be cruel but to survive.=20

As they continued to cuddle, she shared her realization through their=20
link, and realized that it wasn't a matter of logic, but her love's=20
acceptance of her actions. For no matter how independent or head=20
strong she projected to the world, the bottom line was, and she=20
needed her Love's understanding and to know he approved of her. It=20
wasn't logical, it was pure emotional=85and feeling his acceptance of=20
how she felt and all of what she had done in her past was the best=20
medicine she could ever ask for. A pair of bright eyes drew her out=20
of her reverie, it was someone's bedtime.=20

That night after she kissed Cat after her new father told her a story=20
and headed off to work, and checked on the twins, she looked at her=20
oldest and dearest friend and companion for the last few years and=20
felt it=85Andy had made a decision that would affect everyone and as=20
much as she didn't like it, she would have to respect it.=20

Andy knew it was time to move on and he knew where he had to move on=20
too, Captain Janeway. He could feel her need and he hoped that his=20
mistress would understand. Kathryn Janeway didn't necessary need a=20
man in her life or a woman, but a companion for the company and=20
someone who could listen and not judge, and after all, Tamara had her=20
new family, she didn't need him=85in the same way anymore; no, it was=20
time and he had to let his friend and beloved mistress know.

"Kathryn is shutting down again, Andy. I can feel it too." Tamara=20
replied tightly while she scratched the furball's neck as his three=20
purple eyes stayed locked on her green eyes their understanding and=20
love being communicated even though not another word was spoken. They=20
both knew that being a Starfleet Captain for all these years with no=20
break was taking its toll on the amazing woman.=20

Andy whimpered and got up pacing the living area of the quarters. He=20
was agitated and in pain feeling the distress of Captain Janeway and=20
the need to fix it stirred in him strongly. He knew what he needed to=20
do and he could see his current mistress did too, and was grateful=20
that she understood; that he may be what some consider a pet, but he=20
knew his calling in life and was eager to fulfill it.  Purple eyes=20
looked at the door and back to Tamara growling his anxiety. They had=20
their goodbyes; it was time for him to move on.=20

"Cat, I'm going out for just a few minutes. Can you keep an ear open=20
for the twins for me, please?" Tamara asked her oldest daughter.

"Sure, Mom," Cat was nearly seven and the twins were nine months old,=20
and as long as the ship wasn't under attack, they couldn't be=20
safer. "Is Dad on gamma shift this week?"

"Yeah, Cat. I'll be right back. Come on, Andy." The Healer left her=20
quarters followed by a rolling mass of fur the size of an Irish=20
Wolfhound and four-inch incisors. They walked noiselessly through the=20
corridor to the turbo lift. They were in the lift before she realized=20
she had forgotten her shoes. "Bridge." She couldn't help but wonder=20
if on some unconscious level Kathryn knew she would need the large=20
loving ball of fur that would now bring her comfort as he had done=20
for her during the long lonely nights before Chakotay came into her=20
life, and that was why she had bent the rules and allowed Andy to=20
stay.=20

Gamma shift was on duty when the turbo lift doors opened and they=20
walked onto the bridge. Chakotay was on this shift for the week, crew=20
rotation time. He was sitting in the command chair when he spotted=20
them out of the corner of his eye. "Something wrong, Tam?" Chakotay=20
looked up from the report he was reading. He knew something was up=20
when he saw Andy with her, for the large creature was not allowed on=20
the bridge and his wife never went out of her way=85too often to break=20
the rules.

Tamara held her index finger to her lips for silence and pointed to=20
the ready room as if asking if the Captain was in. Chakotay nodded=20
yes and watched as they went to the far side of the bridge as Tamara=20
rang the door chime asking for entry.

"Come in." She stepped only enough so the door opened and Andy=20
bounded in the ready room while Tamara backed away letting the door=20
slid shut.

Turning around, Tamara ran straight into Chakotay and his arms=20
encircled her. He was curious to her actions and why she was on the=20
bridge barefoot. "Mind telling me what that was all about?" He asked=20
gently, seeing sadness in his love's eyes.

"Hopefully a bit of healing and the opening of doors to new=20
possibilities, my love." Tamara answered as she tried to get around=20
him, not wanting to discuss this further at the moment. But he wasn't=20
going to budge, and though this annoyed her, it was also something=20
she loved about him. She wasn't surprised that he hugged and kissed=20
her in front of the night shift, for he had told her once, that if=20
they had a problem with it, they could get their own wife. Though he=20
only did it rarely, for Chakotay was an Officer through and through.=20
He obviously sensed her grief and was offering his love and support.=20

She wiggled out of his grasp and slapped him playfully on the=20
arm. "Behave yourself, Commander, or I'll have to report you for=20
misconduct," she laughed. "I'll give you the full story in the=20
morning." And left giving her husband a playful wink, knowing=20
everyone saw it, and just gave the gossip mill their latest story=85
Commander does it on the bridge with his wife=85told at eleven. When=20
the doors closed, her smile faded, as tears of loss fell down her=20
cheek. Though she was happy for Andy, and Kathryn, she would miss her=20
faithful friend, but she knew=85the time of change was upon them all.=20

************

Tom and B'Elanna's marriage went through their ups and downs, much=20
like Chakotay's and Tamara's but there was most definitely love there=20
and things were smoothing out, also like Chakotay and Tamara's. Then=20
when the news that Chakotay wasn't going to be the only dad on=20
Voyager, no one could be more happy for the young couple than=20
Voyagers first married couple and soon to be god parents.=20

It wasn't long before Tamara was giving B'Elanna tips on how to=20
handle pregnancy and most importantly how to handle her husband;=20
extra back and foot rubs, and midnight runs to the mess hall, While=20
Chakotay was giving Tom tips on the various ways one can apologize=20
for simply breathing wrong at Sardines.=20

"You've got to be kidding," Tom joked, and then felt a shiver down=20
his spine as he saw just how serious Chakotay was being.=20

"I'm telling you, it'll happen. You'll just have to be in the room=20
taking a breath or sighing=85and bam! She'll yell at you like you did=20
the most horrible thing in the universe, and if you don't know how to=20
say your sorry properly, you'll only make matters worse=85trust me;=20
been there done that, had the T-shirt and sold it for diapers."=20

Tom laughed, but he was getting the point, plus he got to hang out=20
with Chakotay and not feel guilty about it. His feelings for the Big=20
guy never was far away, but he was happy with B'Elanna, and could=20
live with simply having this man as his best friend=85Harry being a=20
real close second, but only by a photo finish. "Anything else I=20
should be aware of?"=20

"Yeah, if you hear the words, honey, are you awake=85say no."=20

Tom and Chakotay laughed, but the older man knew that it would only=20
be a matter of time before the younger one realized just how serious=20
he was. The two joined their wives and made future arrangements for=20
their next gathering, for all four of them were truly becoming the=20
best of friends and spent a lot of time with each other.=20

Tamara scheduled her time with Tom and B'Elanna and their Lamaze=20
class, while Chakotay arranged dinner plans, showing off his latest=20
skill that becoming domestic had taught him=85cooking. They were to=20
meet tomorrow night to discuss how to redesign the room for the=20
baby's arrival, discuss names, since Tom and B'Elanna were having=20
trouble deciding, and if all went well, Tom would get his revenge=20
during a little poker. Between Tamara and Chakotay, they could hustle=20
the whiskers off a cat, but Tom felt more than up for the challenge,=20
or punishment, as his wife called it. They bid each other good night,=20
all looking forward to tomorrow night.

************

Tamara was on duty in Sickbay when the ship shook from an attack by=20
the nasty alien of the week. The Doctor came online and they got=20
triage ready for any wounded. By the way the ship was rocking they=20
knew that there would be a lot. It didn't take long before some=20
engineers came stumbling in carrying wounded.

"Major plasma burns near the Jeffries Tube. We still have two people=20
trapped inside." Carrey murmured his own wounds very painful, even to=20
look upon.=20

There was a transporter hum and two badly burned bodies appeared on=20
two empty bio-beds. The Doctor quickly scanned them while Tamara was=20
working on less serious cases. But something made her turn around and=20
over heard the Doctor, her eyes locking on one of the two biobeds.=20

"It's too late, she's dead, Ensign. However, we can still save Ensign=20
Vorick." The Doctor was telling Ensign Baker. "Tamara, I need your=20
assistance with surgery if you please."

"Yeah, Doc." The information of the situation still not registering,=20
she moved by the EMH, then she glanced at the patient and recognized=20
the deceased as B'Elanna. "What about the baby?" she whispered in=20
faint hope of what she already knew was the truth.=20

"Too much damage and the fetus was too young to survive. You can=20
grieve later, Tamara. I need your help with Ensign Vorick." He turned=20
to the next bed and the badly burned Vulcan lying there.

Tamara numbly placed her hands on Vorick's head and face releasing a=20
wave of healing energy through his body. It was enough to heal the=20
worst of the burns and internal damage. Running the scanner over=20
Vorick and using a hypo spray, the Doctor pronounced him stable so he=20
would live long enough to make it into surgery, where the EMH was=20
confident all would be well.

She ran sickbay while the Doctor worked on Vorick, and like a true=20
professional, she kept her focus, tending to each patients needs,=20
placing her own need to grieve aside. Then when all was basically=20
settled, she called for those who had the horrid task of placing the=20
dead into stasis for burial, for there was no need for an autopsy,=20
they knew how the half-Klingon=85her friend, died.=20

She was silent as two crewmen removed B'Elanna to the morgue. The=20
vision she had had months ago came to mind. She recalled that her and=20
Chakotay were about to make love when she was called to sickbay. As=20
she got ready to go, a wave of nausea came over her as did the=20
vision; she left in a foul mood, never explaining it to her love. She=20
had recalled the vision of her doing a healing on Vorick, and she=20
B'Elanna and her child dead. Not every single one of her visions came=20
true, and she had prayed that this had been one, but it was all too=20
real. Tears ran down her face as she felt Chakotay coming up behind=20
her. His arms pulled her into him for the much needed embrace.

"What's wrong, Tam? Talk to me," he pleaded with her. Their link=20
allowed him to feel her grieve and pain of loss, just not the full=20
understanding of it.=20

"We=85we lost B'Elanna and the baby, Tay," she blurted out. "The plasma=20
burns were too severe and she was dead before she got transported to=20
Sickbay." Then she turned and cried into his chest. "I saw it all! I=20
saw the vision months ago=85but I didn't want it to be real, I didn't=20
say anything=85I=85" she sobbed hard, losing all ability to talk, the=20
pain of anguish and guilt overwhelming her.=20

Chakotay felt like someone had punched him in the gut at the news and=20
his tears welled up. He buried his face in Tamara's red hair and=20
tightened his grip on her. His silent sobs joined hers. All he could=20
do was send his love through their link, for he knew that until she=20
was ready, she would hold onto her guilt, and he wasn't able to do=20
much more, for he too lost a loved one today. From the corner of his=20
eye he saw the Doctor preparing a sedative, for Tamara was becoming=20
hysterical, sobbing so hard she might literally choke.=20

"Sickbay to Bridge." The Doctor said as he patched up the last of the=20
wounded. He had placed Tamara under sedation and Chakotay refused to=20
let go of her in his grief over the loss of his dearest friend. Had=20
the Commander not been in more control of himself, he too would have=20
been sedated.=20

"Bridge here, Doctor. What can we do for you?" The Captain responded.=20
The attack was over with and repairs were under way.

"Captain, would you and Lt. Paris please come to Sickbay?" The Doctor=20
asked. He knew they would suspect something wrong, but not this and=20
he only hoped the Captain would be able to give the emotional support=20
Mr. Paris was going to need.=20

"On our way, Doctor."

Captain Janeway and Lt. Paris entered Sickbay and were immediately=20
ushered into the Doctor's office, but not before they saw Chakotay=20
hovering over Tamara.

"What's going on, Doctor?" Janeway became worried.

Tom felt a chill go through him, the foreboding filling the air. As=20
much as he cared for Tamara, he wouldn't be called here for her, so=20
it had to be B'Elanna, but she was no where in sight.

"I'm afraid there's no easy way to say this, Captain, Mr. Paris." The=20
EMH hesitated for a second. "B'Elanna Torres-Paris died of severe=20
plasma burns at 14:23 hours today."

Janeway sucked in her breath, "The baby?"

"I'm sorry, Captain. There was no way for the fetus to survive." The=20
Doctor was intent on Tom's reactions to the news that his wife and=20
child were dead.

Tom stood up, "Captain, I need to make arrangements for the service.=20
Will you excuse me?"

"Will you be alright, Tom?" Kathryn was concerned at the emotionless=20
tone in his voice. She had seen many forms of reaction to hearing=20
that your family was dead, and to her, this was among the worst.=20
She'd prefer if Tom would break down into a babbling mass of tears=20
than this black void. But she also knew there was nothing she could=20
do till Tom was willing to face his loses.=20

"I'll be fine, Captain." He left, not another word or look at anyone.

************

Admiral Paris appeared to him, looking angry and ashamed. "You are=20
such a screw-up, Thomas. No matter what you try to do you fuck it up=20
and destroy those who love you. You did it to me, your family, and=20
even your friends at Caldik Prime."

"Dad, please. I am trying. It was an accident." Tom sobbed.=20

"If you look at it right, B'Elanna's death `was' your fault and that=20
of your child. At least a child could have made up for all the=20
mistakes in your life. A new Paris to take our family even further in=20
Star Fleet, even if they would have had to live down being yours for=20
the rest of their life."

"Don't do this to me, please." Tears fell from haunted blue eyes.

"I would have claimed your child, but not you. A grandchild would=20
have given me a second chance for the Paris line and legacy, but no=20
you had to go and fuck that up too, by killing it!" Cold icy blue=20
eyes bore into his. "The next time you have a child=85no, forget that!=20
You'd only kill any offspring you attempted to have like this one.=20
No, if there is ever to be a future for the Paris line, it won't come=20
from you. Like always, I'll have to take things into my own hand. Do=20
us a favor Tom; put the universe and me out of our misery. Perhaps=20
that's the one thing you just might get right=85sure about as well as=20
you can do anything else." Admiral Paris faded away with an evil=20
laugh that shook Tom to his very core.

The scene shifted and Tom found himself staring at the familiar gray=20
walls of his old cell at Auckland Federal Penal Colony, bent over the=20
end of his bunk bare ass in the air and mouth open for the next=20
taker. His wrists were tied to the bed frame and his ankles to the=20
legs of the bunk. There was a vile taste in his mouth and throat=20
while warm sticky fluids ran down the insides of his thighs. Pain=20
radiated in his rectum and surrounding tissue and the muscles in his=20
jaw ached from cocks being shoved down his throat.

"You're quite the pretty little whore, aren't you?" a gravelly voice=20
said behind him as a rough cloth was used to clean his ass. "You may=20
be worthless at everything else in your life, but you've turned to be=20
quite good at being a whore. Perhaps if you didn't protest so much,=20
I'd even give you a little something to pay for your time."

There were the sounds of his sobbing, "Please, no more."

Footsteps sounded outside of the cell. "Time for your next customers,=20
pretty one, enjoy, I know I sure did."

Two prisoners entered with leers on their faces, pants being undone=20
and cocks being pulled out. His screams were cut off as a fresh cock=20
was shoved roughly in his ass and down his throat.

"See, Tom. Your best efforts are for nothing. Your true place is as a=20
whore for the highest bidder." One of the men scoffed.=20

"What made you think you deserved a wife and child, pretty one?=20
You're my best money maker and I'm waiting for you when get back to=20
the Alpha Quadrant, for I've got them lining up around the corner for=20
a taste of your sweet ass." The gravel voice echoed through his head.

"No!" he screamed as sat straight up in his bed. Staring into the=20
darkness, his body began to shake in terror. "BELANNA!"

Chakotay shook Tamara until she woke up drenched in sweat and tears=20
running down her face. She collapsed in his arms sobbing in anguish=20
over the nightmare she had witnessed, not realizing how much of it=20
she had unknowingly shared with her husband. Even in the safe arms of=20
her love, she could still feel what Tom was suffering.

************

//She was gone or so they told me. The baby was gone. My daughter=20
never had a chance. //

//Both=85gone. //

//Plasma relay blew out. Yeah, right! //

//Someone is playing a joke on me. That has to be it! Harry, did=20
B'Elanna put you up to this? //

// Why is my nose plastered to the glass lid of this casket? //

//Wake up, B'Elanna. Please wake up and tell me you want some garlic=20
leola root ice cream for your latest craving? We need to pick out a=20
name for our baby girl? That's right; Doc said it is going to be a=20
girl=85so you see you have to wake up! //

//Please, someone tell me this is a just a dream or a nightmare? And=20
WHY is it raining on the glass? //

//Who is that screaming? Can't they tell I need quiet to figure this=20
out? //

The peaceful darkness that descends over me when I felt a soft hiss=20
against my neck is welcomed. Then I feel strong burly arms picking me=20
up from the=85floor? It's Chakotay, I'd know him anywhere, and I'm so=20
glad he is here. He'll keep me safe. He'll make everything alright.=20
His arms feel like heaven, and I know it's the only thing keeping me=20
from crossing over after B'Elanna and our daughter=85sleep, yes, sleep=20
in his arms=85this is good.=20

************=09

Harry Kim stepped into the First Officer's quarters when the door=20
opened to his request for entry. It was a typical morning rush in the=20
Chakotay household; Tamara was feeding the twins, Cat couldn't find=20
her shoe and Chakotay was putting his uniform jacket on and trying to=20
wrestle an armful of PADD's at the same time and failing.

"Good morning, Harry." Tamara smiled at him as Ko snatched the spoon=20
out of her hand and waved it around. Charlin grinned at her brother's=20
antics.

"Hi Tamara. Do you and the Commander have a minute?" Harry ran a hand=20
through his thick hair. He looked tired and haggard.

"Mom, where's my shoe?" Cat yelled from the door to her room.

"Try the twin's room, dear," the Healer yelled back while expertly=20
taking the spoon back from her son. Ko looked like a miniature=20
Chakotay, only he had his mother's green eyes. His sister, Charlin,=20
definitely took after her father with the dark hair, eyes and skin,=20
though she had her mom's facial structure. "Have a seat, Harry. We'll=20
be with you in a moment."

Pushing the baby stroller out of the bedroom, Chakotay wheeled it=20
over next to the couch.
"Morning, Harry." Chakotay said as he picked up his daughter, dumped=20
the PADD's on the coffee table, and sat on the couch beside Tamara=20
and Ko.

Cat came running out with her schoolbooks and both shoes on, kissed=20
everyone and ran out the door to join Naomi Wildman for lessons.=20
Smiling at her abrupt departure, Chakotay and Tamara turned their=20
attention on Harry Kim.

"What's up, Harry?" Chakotay asked.

"It's about Tom, Commander. He hasn't been out of his quarters for=20
three days now and he won't let anyone in. He changed his access=20
codes so even I can't get in." Worry tinged his voice and Tamara=20
leaned over to get a good look at his drawn face.

"When is the last time you had any sleep, Ensign?" She asked.

"I don't remember. I'm more worried about Tom at this point, Tamara."=20
Harry answered feeling the exhaustion and strain over the loss of=20
B'Elanna catch up with him.

"We'll deal with Tom. You go and get some sleep. I'm giving you the=20
next 24 hours off, Healer's orders," Tamara said after she got the=20
medical tricorder from her med kit and waved it over him. Loading a=20
hypo spray, she injected a mild sedative in his neck, for the body=20
was already pushing for sleep and didn't need much more help. "Now=20
go, you have about ten minutes before you fall asleep."

"Yes, ma'am," Harry gave in and left going back to his own quarters=20
to sleep, knowing that if anyone could help Tom, it would be the=20
Commander and his wife. He had seen how close the four of them had=20
become, and how Tom would slip from time to time and call Chakotay=20
and Tamara his family. At first he had been a bit jealous, but, when=20
he knew his part as Tom's friend was secure, he was happy for Tom,=20
now he was grateful, for at times like this, only family will do.
=09
"How do you think we should handle this?" Chakotay asked as he made=20
the changes to the duty roster, before sending it to the bridge,=20
possibly freeing up him or Tamara or both if need be.=20

"You go, check on Tom and see what his state of mind is. Then call me=20
and we can decide from there. I'll get the twins settled and join=20
you. One way or the other, together we'll help Tom." Tamara finished=20
settling the twins in the stroller while they babbled to each other.

"Okay, baby. Do you have any idea when the Doctor will be back=20
online?" Chakotay asked as he followed his family out of their=20
quarters, for the EMH had gone down shortly after the funeral,=20
another blown relay; this time they were lucky, no one died.

"Any day now, Tay." She said, going left as Chakotay moved right,=20
heading for the turbo lift.=20

Once reaching Tom's door knowing he'd be ignored, he used his command=20
override, and entered the quarters of Voyager's Chief Pilot unsure of=20
what he would find. The lights were on low as he stepped into the=20
living area and looked around at the shambles. Nearly everything had=20
been destroyed, but no sign of Tom as Chakotay picked his way through=20
the rubble towards the bedroom. He mentally kicked himself for=20
letting Tom alone for so long; even the fact that he had his hands=20
full with being the ship's XO, husband, and Father of three, didn't=20
seem to measure up as enough as an excuse.=20

There was a low humming sound as he peeked into the bedroom and found=20
what he was looking for. With blank eyes staring at nothing, Tom sat=20
on the middle of his bed rocking back and forth humming tunelessly.=20
Dried tears left tracks down his beautiful face and there was a=20
smudge of dried blood on his forehead, from what looked like he had=20
hit his head.

"Tom?" Chakotay asked as he entered the room, which was nice and=20
neat, compared to the outer room.

There was no response from the younger man.

"Tom?" He placed a hand on the rocking shoulder, but got no response.=20
It was like Tom was in his own private world.

With a heavy sigh, the First Officer tapped his=20
communicator. "Chakotay to Sickbay."

"Sickbay here, Commander." Tamara answered since she was now on duty=20
as Acting Chief Medical Officer till the EMH was brought back on line.

"I'm bringing Tom in, Tam. He's in bad shape"

"Okay, I'm all ready for him. Neelix has the twins for the day.=20
Sickbay out."

Chakotay did a site to site transport for Tom and himself to Sickbay.=20
He had no problem laying the pilot on the bio-bed while Tamara ran a=20
medical scanner over his body.

"Lt. Carey to Sickbay."

"Sickbay here, Lt." Tamara responded not happy at all with the way=20
her scans read.

"You should be able to activate the Doctor. We finished repairs on=20
his matrix." Joe Carey, the new Chief Engineer relayed.

"Thank you, Mr. Carey." Tamara said. "Computer, activate Emergency=20
Medical Hologram."

The Doctor appeared, "Please state the nature of the medical=20
emergency."

"Over here. It's Tom," Chakotay said as Tamara handed the tricorder=20
to the hologram, his eyes still on the young pained though distant=20
face before him.

"I don't like the looks of this at all," The Doctor admitted, and=20
began treatment=85of his physical condition. The mental would take more=20
than a hypo.=20

************

Captain Janeway and Commander Chakotay sat in the briefing room with=20
the Doctor and Healer Tamara to determine the status of Thomas Eugene=20
Paris.

"Mr. Paris has not eaten or slept since her death and he is now on=20
full life support in Sickbay," the Doctor reported.

"And what is your take on this, Healer?" Janeway asked, wanting every=20
perspective before making a decision.

"I don't know if he will recover, Captain. I say indefinite medical=20
leave for the time being." Tamara recommended in her medical=20
opinion. "Tom needs time to deal with this. I did a surface scan and=20
he is absolutely shattered at this moment. Intense shock."

"How was he when you found him, Commander?" the Captain asked as she=20
looked into her empty coffee cup, missing the look of guilt and pain=20
that flashed through her friend and First Officer's eyes, but she was=20
the only one to miss it.

"Tom must have had a fit of temper at one point. When I entered his=20
quarters, the living and dining areas were destroyed." Chakotay=20
replied dully, trying to keep himself in check.

"I see. Doctor, do you agree with the Healer in this matter?"

"I concur, Captain." The EMH advised.

"Who is going to be his counselor?" Kathryn noted the dark circles=20
under Chakotay's eyes. Her gaze caught Tamara's eyes and she took a=20
good look at him even more.

"I will," Tamara said. "Some of my medical training has involved=20
counseling training." She saw Chakotay jump at her words. She could=20
tell that he wanted the job, but under the circumstances, it would=20
prove too much for her Love. She knew that Chakotay loved Tom Paris,=20
and this was killing him. She also knew Tom was no threat to her=20
marriage, for Chakotay was a loyal man, but that was also part of the=20
problem. He loved Tom, and though he wouldn't do anything to=20
jeopardize his family, he'd sacrifice everything for those he loved=85
this included Tom. No, he was too close, and Tom needed someone who=20
cared, who could understand loss on a large scale and still remain=20
objective=85that wasn't Chakotay.=20

"What do you think, Doctor?" Kathryn was thinking that her First=20
Officer needed some time to deal with his grief, not fully aware of=20
the emotions involved, and was glad that his wife agreed.=20

"Since he has a rapport with Tamara, I see no harm in letting her=20
try," he responded.

They spent a few moments agreeing on procedures for Tom's benefit=20
while Tamara and Kathryn silently worried about Chakotay.

"Commander, you've been quiet through most of this. Do you need some=20
time? I know B'Elanna was a dear friend of yours," Janeway noticed=20
the unshed tears in his dark eyes. She felt bad since they were all=20
worried about Tom and no one had spared a thought for him.

"I'll be fine, Captain." His tone was short and Tamara eyed him with=20
concern, for she knew that her Love had grieved over B'Elanna,=20
performing the rites of the dead. This was his love and guilt for the=20
young man out cold in sickbay, and being torn between where he should=20
be and wants to be at the moment.

"Could Mr. Tuvok be open for counseling people as well, Captain? I=20
know Harry Kim is not having an easy time with this." Tamara put in=20
hoping to cut this short and get Chakotay alone for a moment.

"Good idea. I'll ask him. I want the Doctor and Commander Chakotay to=20
monitor your sessions from time to time to see how things are going.=20
Dismissed." Janeway got up and left the briefing room followed by the=20
Doctor as Tamara placed a hand on Chakotay's arm for him to stay.

"What do you need, Chakotay?" Tamara asked hiding her own irritation,=20
for no matter what, she was still human. She credited herself for=20
being able to accept the fact that Chakotay loved Tom, and accepted=20
he'd never do anything about it, but this situation had changed some=20
of the rules, as she and Chakotay were learning.=20

"I need time, dear heart. Will you give it to me?" It was a simple=20
request.

"Take all the time you need, baby. We'll be waiting for you." She=20
said sincerely, knowing that it was the only answer. He husband was a=20
proud man, and like her, liked to work things out for himself. She=20
gave him an understanding look and left, for she would have her hands=20
full and needed to make preparations.=20

************

It had taken a couple of days, but between Tuvok and herself, they=20
had been able to coax Tom out of his mental nook, and back into the=20
world of the living, much to his disdain. This allowed Tamara a=20
chance to work with Tom, who showed he could be just as stubborn as=20
her husband, and wondered for more than the first time how the two=20
men could have not been suited for each other. Fortunately, what=20
often worked on Chakotay worked on Tom, and she had been able to=20
penetrate some of his barriers.=20

Visitors had been restricted to Tuvok, the EMH, and herself, by her=20
orders, stating that Tom was not up to facing others, but it was for=20
deeper reasons that what she let on. Harry couldn't take the stress=20
of seeing his best friend so despondent, nor could her husband, who=20
was still working `things out'. Though Chakotay was there doing his=20
duty, he was far away with his emotions and his heart during this=20
time. She thought it best that all three have a break and hopefully=20
heal.=20

After five days of what seemed like a personal mental heal for her,=20
Tom wouldn't let her in, nor Tuvok or the EMH. He had closed himself=20
off, and with every attempt he added a new wall of defense=85they were=20
losing him, and she was at her wits end. That, even though she=20
promised herself not to burden her husband with any of this, he broke=20
down and cried in his arms, sharing her frustration at her failure,=20
to the point she cried herself asleep.=20

Late that night when she awoke, curled in her husband's loving arms,=20
she did something she knew she shouldn't but she was desperate. She=20
reached into her sleeping husband's mind to see what resolves he made=20
about Tom, and found what she already knew=85he loved him with all his=20
heart, and if he hadn't fallen for Tamara, he would have tried for a=20
relationship for the young man. It didn't matter that she knew,=20
confirmation was always painful, but she pushed that aside=85desperate=20
times called for desperate measures; she only hoped that if the truth=20
was ever learned, Chakotay and Tom would be able to forgive her.=20

She had touched Tom's mind and knew how much he loved Chakotay,=20
though it didn't take away from what he felt for his wife. In the=20
young man's mind, the ultimate life would have been both of them to=20
love and cherish. Though like Chakotay, he too would do nothing to=20
harm her or interfere with Chakotay's family. But=85it was the only key=20
she thought she had left=85and knowing that if she didn't use it, she=20
was sure Tom would be dead by the end of the week, even if his body=20
continued to function.=20

"Forgive me, Love," she whispered barely above a breath, and then=20
gently pushed farther into Chakotay's mind=85 Then she left heading for=20
sickbay, where Tom had to remain to be monitored. When she was there=20
standing next to a sleeping Tom Paris, she reached into his mind,=20
just enough to plant the seed=85 the rest would come from another=20
source. Then she left, erasing any record of her presence and headed=20
back to her quarters.=20

She climbed back into bed, and curled up to Chakotay, resolve in her=20
eyes, for she had accepted her guilt. She nudged her love, "Honey=85"=20
she said as if half-sleeping. "Honey."=20

"Hmmm?"=20

"I think one of the twins is up=85go check?" she mumbled, as if she was=20
sleeping. This was nothing new in their routine of things, so=20
Chakotay thought nothing of it as he nodded, half asleep and got up=20
from bed grabbing his robe and exited the bedroom. She stared at the=20
door, suddenly concerned. //Now is not the time for second=20
thoughts! // she chided herself, as doubt started to fill her. But=20
she knew what was done was done=85there was really no turning back now.=20

************

He felt strong fingers caressing his skin and opened his eyes to see=20
who it was, and was surprised to see that it was Chakotay standing=20
over him in his night robe. The dark eyes looking down at him were=20
filled with love, concern=85and pain.

He hadn't seen anyone for along time, especially Chakotay since the=20
day after the funeral. He remembered how much he wanted too see him,=20
but couldn't find the courage to seek him out, and he knew Chakotay=20
wouldn't come looking for him=85but yet=85here he stood.=20

"Cha?" his voice was soft, groggy from sleep, and he wasn't hundred=20
percent sure he wasn't dreaming.=20

"It's alright, love, I'm here," Chakotay replied lovingly, as he=20
continued his caresses on soft pale skin and hair. "I'm here, and if=20
you let me, I'll always be here for you."=20

Tom may have normally questioned this, but at the moment he didn't=20
care, Chakotay called `him' love, and said he'd be there for him, and=20
he wanted that more than anything. He needed it more than anything.=20
He slowly rose from the biobed, keeping the contact between=20
Chakotay's hand and his face. "I need you too," he whispered, his=20
blue eyes seeking out Chakotay's seeing that his words were accepted.=20

Chakotay reached out and pulled the young blond into his arms and=20
held him tightly. "I love you, Tom Paris, and I need you too," he=20
declared as tears started to fall down his face. "I can't lose you,=20
please don't make me lose you," he begged.=20

Tom gently pulled back enough to look into tear filled eyes and felt=20
his own flow, for the love he saw was overwhelming and for him.=20
Chakotay loved him! As he continued to look at the man he knew he=20
would have chosen for himself had fate not stepped in, all his=20
barriers fell like the walls of Jericho, and he kissed the lips he so=20
desired. "You won't lose me," he promised, not only with his words=20
but his heart.  Then sweet mouths merged and bodies intertwined as=20
passions flowed, the two men releasing their love freely to one=20
another.=20

************

Chakotay stirred and tossed to his side, only to be assaulted by=20
twins and the words "Daddy!" echoing through his hazy brain. He=20
opened his eyes and smiled, feeling better than he had in a long=20
time. He roared at the little one's as was the game=85waking the=20
sleeping bear, and the he laughed as he sat up and watched them run=20
off giggling, to get Cat' the bear trainer.=20

He noticed that Tamara was already up, but that didn't bother him,=20
she had been stressed and that kept her from sleeping well. He rubbed=20
his hand over his face and hair, and stopped, //usually my hair dries=20
if I take a shower before bed? // he thought, since it was damp, but=20
shook it off and climbed out of bed.=20

He put on his robe and walked out into the mad house, seeing that=20
Tamara was feeling ambitious, for breakfast was on the=20
table. "Morning," he greeted her with a kiss and a huge grin.=20

He saw her give a wry smile and then looked at him as if analyzing=20
something, "what?" he asked as his grin grew wider, especially as=20
the `Bear trainer' was up and telling the twins that she'd handle the=20
creature.=20

Tamara changed her expression to a warm smile, "Nothing. Just glad to=20
have you back=85that's all."=20

Chakotay snorted, "didn't know I left," he teased. Then before they=20
could continue the conversation, his role as the `bear' was being=20
placed into demand, and he lovingly filled it, for all of them got a=20
kick out of it, though it never lasted long.=20

Then the family sat down to breakfast and went through their morning=20
routine. Today, Sam stopped by and got the twins and Cat, leaving=20
Chakotay and Tam a few minutes of peace.=20

"Feeling better today?" he asked, concerned about how upset his wife=20
had been last night about Tom.=20

"Yes, actually. In fact, call it a gut feeling, but I believe that=20
I'll make a break through with Tom today."=20

Chakotay smiled, "Healer's intuition?"=20

Tamara turned away, using the dishes to be cleaned up as her=20
reason, "Something like that," she replied, and moved about her=20
business.=20

After a few minutes she and Chakotay reported to work, Tamara to=20
sickbay and Chakotay to the bridge. By lunch, the senior staff=20
received a report that Tom had made significant progress, much to=20
everyone's surprise, except Chakotay, who didn't doubt his wife one=20
iota. In fact, according to the EMH and Tuvok, Tom had made a one=20
eighty in his behavior over night, and though they didn't know the=20
reason, it didn't matter, there was now hope. They estimated that Tom=20
would be back within the month if he continued on this new path.=20
Kudos went out to Tamara for a job well done, and all thought for the=20
first time in quite awhile that things were going to finally get=20
better and back to normal=85or what stood for normal on Voyager anyway.

************
End of Part Ten
************


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************
Part Eleven
************
See Part One for disclaimer

"Only one more detail, Tom," Tamara said excitedly. Her face was=20
glowing as she looked over the holo-program that she had created with=20
Tom's help and guidance. It was a place from her childhood in the=20
mountains of West Virginia overlooking a valley nearly sixty miles=20
long and roughly twenty miles wide.

"What's that?" Tom grinned at her excitement, not only for being=20
close to finishing the program, but doing something outside of=20
therapy with the woman that kept him from death or worse.

"Fire flies, grasshoppers, owls and a whippoorwill by the pond," she=20
blushed under his stare. "Maybe a garter snake or two that I could=20
slip under the bed clothes." With a chuckle.

"You have a twisted mind and an evil sounding chuckle," he laughed=20
with his blue eyes twinkling.

"I know." They laughed together.
=09
Tom had come a long way towards healing these last few months with=20
the help of the Healer and his friends. With Tamara's help, he took=20
control of his life. Dealing with all the issues in his life had=20
given him a new confidence in himself and he finally started to like=20
himself. He was back at the conn flying, doing shifts in Sickbay,=20
playing uncle to the Chakotay kids and recently he started playing=20
pool at Sandrine's and going to the resort with friends and that=20
included Chakotay.

It wasn't too bad to get out of bed these days since he was also=20
getting to fulfill one of his dreams. That one dream was to be near=20
Chakotay and have a small part in his life. Thanks to Tom and his=20
love for vids, movie night became a big favorite in the Chakotay=20
household with family and friends sprawled all over the place.

Tamara played hostess, providing lots of popcorn, soda and candy=20
while Chakotay and Tom would watch the twins; though in her book,=20
that was only asking the bigger kids to watch the smaller ones. Most=20
of the time it would turn into a sleepover for their guests, for=20
after watching movies over half the night, most fell asleep where=20
they were, and Chakotay and Tamara never had the heart to wake them,=20
especially Tom; who Chakotay quietly would take to the couch and tuck=20
him in without a second thought. Even Captain Janeway showed up once=20
in awhile for movie night thought she always showed good sense to=20
leave before it got too late. Yep, movie night was a hit and became a=20
fast tradition in the Chakotay household giving a whole new option=20
for the crew on Friday nights, and it made Tom happy to be in their=20
life even for a little bit.

Tom and Harry were spending a great deal of time together even though=20
Harry had started to date Seven of Nine, for he never wanted to=20
overstay his welcome in Chakotay's families lives, no matter how much=20
they said he was welcome to be there. Being there was too important=20
to him and he would do nothing to jeopardize it. He did feel a little=20
bad taking Harry away from Seven for their relationship was getting=20
pretty serious and the crew was looking forward to another wedding in=20
the near future.

************

Chakotay gave a deep sigh as tapped his com badge. "Computer,=20
location of Healer Tamara."

"Healer Tamara is in holodeck 2." The computer voice answered.

This was the third time this week he had awaken and found her gone.=20
Always to the Holodeck she went to try and wear herself out so she=20
could sleep; obviously something was bothering her and she wasn't=20
talking about it. Even her work was beginning to suffer and her=20
temper was flaring up in irritability. With great concern he got up=20
and got dressed and set off to find his wife.=20

Wondering if he should leave her alone or not, he wander down to=20
Holodeck 2 on Deck Four and noticed Tom Paris standing outside the=20
doors to the holodeck. He was leaning against the corridor wall with=20
his arms crossed and a grin on his face=85at 0200 AM in the morning?

"In the dog house, uh, Chakotay?" Tom stated as the Commander stopped=20
beside him.

"None of your business, Paris. Why are you here anyway?" He snapped=20
as he looked at the panel to see what program Tamara was=20
running. "Healer 2A Glass Shop. What kind of program is that?"

"Tamara likes to throw things when she gets mad." Tom replied not=20
bothered at all by Chakotay's waspishness, or the fact he wasn't sure=20
why he was here, he just was.

"How would you know?" His face drew up into scowl.

"I helped her design it. We've done several programs together over=20
the last few months. Tam's got lots of great ideas and together we=20
make pretty mean programs," he smiled teasingly at the older man.

"Did you know the safeties are off? There's also a privacy lock on=20
it." He growled, ignoring the pilot who had become an extension of=20
his family over the last few months. This was between Tamara and=20
himself, not Tom, and it was time they worked it out.

"I wouldn't interrupt her, Chakotay. Not until she cools off or=20
changes the program. I know, I walked in once and she doesn't pay=20
attention to where she's throwing that stuff." Tom advised.

Of course, Chakotay thought he knew better and used his override=20
command codes to open the holodeck doors. Sounds of breaking glass=20
rang in his ears as he entered a store full of vases and drinking=20
glasses. There was also the sound of Tamara talking very loud to=20
herself and the walls around her.

"Always Miss Goody Two Shoes, never the fucking bitch. When do I get=20
to be selfish and greedy?" Tamara picked up a heavy French cut vase=20
and hurled it against the far wall of the store. "When do I get to=20
pull the covers over my head and pretend the world went away?"

Another glass shattered as her words continued, "Same with the big=20
man. Work, work, and work. How about some fucking flowers or a lousy=20
box of chocolates? Or Hey, baby, I got off early tonight, how about a=20
walk on the beach under the moonlight? Why can't I come first for a=20
change?"

"How about Voyager not expecting so much from me? I never wanted to=20
be a damn doctor, but I agreed to it for the sake of the crew, but do=20
I really want play doctor? Not much! I'm a fucking secretary! I love=20
doing paperwork not attending cuts and bruises. I'm supposes to be an=20
Executive Administrative Assistant where I can work from the=20
background in the shadows back home=85well fuck I miss that!" Another=20
glass hit the wall and a smile lit her face as she watched the crash=20
with satisfaction.=20

"Watch the mouth, Tamara. It's always gotten you into trouble in the=20
past." She chided herself. "That's not how a mother of three should=20
act=85Ahhhh Little Mother, be damn, I want to rest. But no, I got my=20
duties and I'll get all the rest I want when I dead, right? Well Fuck=20
duty for two minutes!"

The venom in her voice stunned Chakotay as he stood there not even=20
noticing Tom standing behind him. The far wall of the store had piles=20
of broken glass at the base from his wife's current fit.=20

Tamara was breathing hard from her exertions while reaching for a=20
tray of drinking glasses. Sweat matted her hair and she rubbed a hand=20
over her tear-stained face knocking her safety glasses astray. "Away=20
missions? Why, yes dear, I understand or no fucking problem, ma'am,=20
anything for the crew. I'm always happy to help, no matter what." She=20
said with hurt and regret as one glass after another hit the wall=20
with loud shattering crashes while Tamara's voice drop to a low=20
mutter. "I wish I was home," she cried.

One last crash as a heavy glass-serving tray hit the wall, but Tamara=20
never noticed the two men behind her as she tossed the safety glasses=20
to the floor. Tamara had really worked up a sweat and her hair was=20
plastered to her head, "Computer, change program to Healer West=20
Virginia."

Everything was silent as they found themselves at the edge of the=20
tree line in a deep valley high in the Appalachian Mountains. The men=20
could see the Healer heading for the pond near a farmhouse that dated=20
around the beginning of the twentieth century.

A tall black man met her at the edge of the pond and gave her a big=20
hug. Tom slapped a hand on Chakotay's shoulder when the big man was=20
ready to charge in full of jealousy and anger. They started talking=20
softly and he escorted her to a bench at the edge of the pond.=20
Sitting together on the bench, they watched the sunset and continued=20
talking softly.

"Chakotay, I think we should leave. If she finds us here, she'll be=20
upset." Tom whispered hoping to get the big man out of there. "You=20
have no reason to be angry at Tamara for trying to work out her=20
frustrations, especially with a hologram. It'll be okay, Cha, just=20
give her some time, Okay?"=20=20

The shoulder under his hand relaxed slightly as Chakotay swung around=20
to him. He couldn't but help notice how the light made Chakotay's=20
dark eyes sparkle and his skin shine, especially the little bit of=20
moisture on the full lips that suddenly seemed to be taunting him=20
with their presence.=20

Tom was right, Tam had to work this out for herself, and he realized=20
he was pushing in where he didn't belong=85and with that thought a=20
tingle came over him, as if his thought had meant something, but he=20
shook it off. Breathing hard and keeping a lid on his temper, he=20
suddenly noticed Tom's lips were slightly parted and he was licking=20
those soft pink lips nervously. Then he realized how the red and gold=20
sunset made Tom look beautiful with the light framing his golden=20
looks, presenting an angle to a weary mortal; He forgot about=20
everything but the beautiful man before him that he didn't notice=20
that their surroundings had changed from a beautiful forest, but to=20
the Sickbay on Voyager.=20

Tom found himself looking into a pair of beautiful ebony eyes and=20
smiled as his heart lurched, for he knew this was where his heart=20
lie. Reaching over, he stroked Chakotay's cheek with the back of his=20
hand with affection, recalling how soft his skin was to the=20
touch. "So lovely," Tom murmured as he pulled Chakotay against him=20
and gave in to his urge to kiss those full sensual lips, recalling=20
how sweet they were.

Melting against the slim body, Chakotay wrapped himself around the=20
younger man and returned the kiss hard and demanding more from him,=20
knowing the young man would give it to him freely. Moaning with need=20
and want Tom's tongue had teased Chakotay's lips into opening so he=20
could explore the inside of his mouth and the cool heat vibrated=20
throughout his body, as his mind chided him for doing without this=20
for so long.

Hips and erections rubbed against each other through their layers of=20
clothing. Chakotay's lips blazed a trail down the long pale neck=20
biting and sucking leaving marks showing where he had been. He ceased=20
thinking and gave into the sensations and pleasures of the moment and=20
in one swoop, picked Tom up into his arms and laid him down on the=20
biobed and climbed on, ready to ravish the man beneath him.

"Chakotay, wake-up." A sudden rush of adrenaline woke him up like it=20
was a red alert and he bolted upright on the bed. Turning in fright=20
and guilt, he found Tamara kneeling next to him with a scared look on=20
her face.

"Are you okay, Tay?" She reached for him with one hand and was very=20
surprised when he flinched. She pulled back in wonder and acceptance.

"Nothing," he lied quickly unable to hide his shame. He was hoping=20
the shadows of the room would hide his embarrassment.

"Tom Paris, uh," she chuckled slightly, sitting back and crossing her=20
legs. "That man is a beautiful piece of work, isn't he?"

"What?" He got an incredulous look on his bronze face.

"Come on, Tay. He's been under you skin for years and now=85you're=20
dreaming about him again." Tamara stated.

"How do you know? Have you been reading my thoughts without=20
permission?" He demanded to know as he grabbed her wrist pulling her=20
to him.

With the face that allowed her and her husband to clean up at the=20
poker tables, "I couldn't sleep, so I was on the holodeck meditating=20
after a=85workout when suddenly your `dreams' invaded my spirit realm.=20
You and Tom put on quite a show, you know." She told him truthfully=20
and felt him stiffen up beneath her body.

"What=85what do you know about it?" He got defensive until she started=20
wiggling around trying to distract him and keep him from putting up=20
walls.

"I know more than you think," she smarted off to him playing with his=20
chest directing some of his sexual energy toward her.

Chakotay pushed her off of him and got up from the bed not knowing=20
what to think anymore. True he did dream about Tom from time to time,=20
but this last time=85it was more than a dream somehow, for it felt so=20
real, and his body was aching for a touch he never really had, yet=20
was missing. He pulled on his civilian clothes and grabbed his=20
medicine bundle.

"I need to think and meditate, Tam, I'm going to the holodeck."

"Fine. Whatever." She locked herself in the bathroom for some=20
guaranteed privacy, and leaned against the door. //that was too=20
close, // she chided herself, as tears fell down her face. They had=20
almost remembered what happened in sickbay all those moths ago, and=20
that would be a disaster. It also showed that Chakotay and Tom were=20
more connected than she had realized if the two of them were pulled=20
together like that, via her; and a part of her was glad it was=20
through her, or she wouldn't have known in time to stop it from=20
progressing too far.=20

Of course there was the sting of how close Tom and Chakotay were,=20
after only one night, even if neither man truly remembered it, where=20
she had to work for Chakotay's love. She closed her eyes and felt=20
Chakotay's confusion of the dream, the guilt of desiring Tom since he=20
was married to a woman he loved=85 //Yes, he loves me, // she reminded=20
herself.=20

Then she worked on placing up barriers to block the link between the=20
two men, not just for her, but for them. A dark part of her wanted to=20
rip it out, but that would hurt Tom greatly, for it was the union of=20
Chakotay's love that really healed him, not her. Sure, she helped him=20
get back on his feet and gain self worth, but it was Chakotay that=20
gave him the reason to try. No, removing the link was out of the=20
question, she would just have to work harder on keeping it from=20
bleeding through like it had been.=20

She did what she could, sensing that Tom had continued on with his=20
share of the memory, believing it a dream, and if he continued he=20
might remember that it was real=85this couldn't be allowed, so with a=20
mental push=85

Tom woke up with a shout, "Chakotay," and a raging hard on. Finding=20
himself alone in his quarters from the life like dream, he pulled his=20
cock out and finished his thoughts of Chakotay in his arms, the two=20
of the making love. Afterwards, he took a warm shower and went=20
peacefully to sleep.
=09
***********

Even weeks later, the subject of Tom Paris and the dream became a=20
forbidden subject between them and was left open and unspoken of.=20
They still enjoyed their friendship with Tom, for both of them felt=20
that Tom was apart of their family now, but never mentioned that=20
night to him or each other=85it was to be dropped and so it was, to a=20
degree.=20=20

With that as a distraction, Chakotay forgot about the problems he had=20
seen Tamara was facing in the dream, not realizing it was her mind=20
that he and Tom had transversed, because her veneer of control was=20
slipping beyond her grasp.

This led to her taking up counseling sessions with Tuvok, but up till=20
today, they had gone almost text book, and very clam. She would=20
discus some of her concerns, and Tuvok would point out the logic of=20
the situation, but today, it didn't seem to be enough, and finally,=20
(as Tuvok had quietly thought,) she broke her calm exterior.=20

"Oh=85fuck logic!" she suddenly snapped. "Logic isn't always the key to=20
every problem, sometimes you have too=85take risks, regardless of the=85
logic or right or wrongness of the actions taken," she fumed.=20

This got Tuvok's attention, "Are you saying you have done the wrong=20
thing, knowing it was wrong in your eyes?"=20

She turned her dark green eyes on the Vulcan, anger flaring, not only=20
at his all too calm manner, but because she revealed something she=20
wasn't suppose to; so in response she simply stood up and started to=20
storm toward the door, her intentions of leaving, and was surprised=20
to find that they wouldn't open. She whirled, "Let me out of here!"

"You have not answered my question, Healer," Tuvok stated, knowing=20
that for humans, they needed to be pushed at times to reveal unwanted=20
emotions, Healer Tamara was no exception.=20

"Let me out of here, you pointed eared freak!" she shouted, her face=20
flushing with the red of her temper. "You have no right to keep me=20
here! No body has the right to keep me prisoner!"=20
"You have been a prisoner? Back on Rashela?"=20

"None of your business," she growled, and turned away, facing the=20
doors, but not seeing them, as her hands clenched and unclenched as=20
she took deep breaths to control her anger.=20

"Perhaps it `is' my `business', since it obviously holds a great deal=20
of meaning to you," he stated calmly.  He arched a brow when he saw=20
her slim shoulders starting to rise and fall rapidly, thinking she=20
had started to cry, but the sound he heard from her removed that=20
belief=85she was laughing.=20

Tamara turned to face Tuvok, not caring if tears were falling down=20
her face or not, she didn't give a damn. "Yeah, I was in prison. You=20
want to know why? For killing a guard that was trying to hold me down=20
when that bastard of a Prince wanted to rape me. He raped me, and I=85I=20
go to jail=85is that a lark or what?" she laughed, as more tears of=20
pain fell down her cheeks.=20

"Oh, and don't think the rapes stopped once I was `safely' tucked=20
away in a foul stinking rotting cell=85no! Oh, the guard's didn't touch=20
me that way; they wouldn't dare=85that privilege was left up to Cat's=20
sperm donor, every fucking chance he got! Oh, they had their own=20
forms of fun with me too=85dead rats in my food, stripping me naked in=20
front of them all on a night Jack Frost would have been shivering on.=20
Oh, and let's not forget their favorite, how much can we beat her ass=20
till she can't heal it and hid it from the Prince, for if he got wind=20
I was hurt, he would chew them out. No, real punishment, just yell,=20
and then they would take it out on me again!"=20

By now she had moved from the doors and was hovering over Tuvok that=20
still remained seated in his chair. "To get out of prison I had to=20
agree to be that son-of-a-bitches whore and bear him a child! A child=20
I didn't want=85" she caught her words with horrific meaning, and=20
turned away, clasping her hands over her mouths as some realization=20
dawned on her, and she cried.=20

"You are a good mother, Tamara," Tuvok stated, his voice a bit=20
lower. "The fact that you had doubts about becoming=85"

"It wasn't doubt," she stated, turning toward the man, "I=85I didn't=20
want her," she cried. "I didn't want my own daughter," she added as=20
she sat down on the sofa and let the pain flow from her heart.=20

"Because she was forced on you?"=20

"No, because she would be a constant reminder of that hell and all I=20
lost=85" She looked up, her face swollen from tears, "I didn't want her=20
for that reason=85but=85but now=85"=20

"You no longer feel that way about her."=20

"No, I=85now she and the other children=85they=85they remind me of what I=20
could lose now."=20

Tuvok arched his brow, "Clarify?"=20

"It was sudden when I was taken or what have you from my time and=20
home, what is there to say it won't happen again? Before I would have=20
given anything to go back, now=85" she used her sleeve like a child to=20
wipe her face and nose.

"You wish to stay with the family and the life you have created here.=20
That is a most logical desire for one such as you, Healer. But may I=20
point out, you your self said they, the people of Rashela were=20
performing an experiment, and the odds of a portal back to your=20
original time without their direct assistance, is, three hundred=20
billion six hundred and ninety-seven million, eight thousand and four=20
to one, give or take the current facts as I have calculated.=20

She only stared at him for a moment, stunned at the astronomical=20
number he had just quoted, "It sounds like you have given this some=20
thought?"=20

"When you became a member of this crew, it was my duty to see if=20
there would be any unexpected departures on your behalf," he stated,=20
not a lie, but he would never admit he was concerned for the=20
Commander should he lose the mother of his children.=20

She had stopped crying and gave a small laugh, mostly from the=20
releasing of stress that had been built up for so long. "Well, if I=20
had of known, I probably wouldn't have been so worried."  Then she=20
yawned, another physical sign of the body releasing pent of stress,=20
not necessarily meaning she was tried.=20

"As for what occurred back on Rashela, I would like us to discuss=20
that in more detail, as well as to what guilt plague you in regards=20
to your actions, and why you think they were wrong, in our next=20
session. I believe you have exerted yourself enough for now."=20

Tamara had only nodded yes, as she stifled another yawn, feeling the=20
pent up stress from the emotions she had kept bottled up along with=20
the guilt of even having them, finally start to leave her. She was=20
also glad that Tuvok took her words in reference to the distant past,=20
so she felt that her particular secret about her husband and Tom was=20
safe. "Very well," she said softly as she stood up and moved toward=20
the doors, then looked back at him.

"They will open, for I had them set on a timer, to assure our session=20
was not cut short."=20

"Very insightful," she stated, though there was little anger, for he=20
did help her overcome one of the many hurdles she had been blocking,=20
keeping her from containing the confines of her mind. She then turned=20
after giving him another nod, this of respect, and left, walking=20
slowly down the hall. With each step came a realization that it was=20
the secrets that were hurting her, for she had always been the type=20
of person that never wanted to hold anything back from those she=20
love; but things had changed, she had changed, but not as much as she=20
had hoped.=20

She stepped into her quarters, her home=85and felt empty inside seeing=20
it was empty of its occupants, her children and her husband, and all=20
the extensions of her family, Tom=85and Kathryn, Harry=85 The ones she=20
loved with all of her being and would do anything to protect them.=20
She knew that the adults were on duty, and Cat was in school, and the=20
twins were in day care, set up by the crew, for as more and more=20
people were pairing off, children were soon to be in the picture.=20

She moved in and walked to the view port, staring at the stars, her=20
arms folded around her chest, when a glint of gold caught her eye.=20
She turned to see the picture on the near by table and moved to pick=20
it up, it was a group shot taken by Neelix, Her, the twins, Cat,=20
Chakotay, and Tom=85 looking very happy=85they all were. She=20
sighed, //Some secrets are necessary, but not all guilt. // She=20
decided then to work out as much as she could with Tuvok, to help put=20
the past where it belonged, so her future could be more clear; as for=20
Tom and Chakotay, once again, she accepted her responsibility, and=20
looking at the picture, taken not that long ago, seeing a happy=20
smiling man=85guilt flew out the window.=20

She put down the picture, "Okay, girl. Out with the old in with the=20
new," she smiled. "And this is your home=85and nothing or no one is=20
going to take it away from you=85including you=85you hear me?" she asked=20
her reflection in the view port. "Good!"  With her conviction in=20
place, she set herself in motion. Sure it would take some time with=20
Tuvok to work some of the things out, but this was her home and where=20
her future lay, and she was going to make the best she could out of=20
it!

************

Tamara slipped from the warmth of Chakotay's arms, body and bed to=20
check on the twins, for it was her turn. Kolotay was asleep, but=20
Charlin was fussing until Mom picked her up and settled into the=20
rocking chair for a bout of rocking and humming. At two years old,=20
Mom was still needed to rock them to sleep and chased their fears=20
away, and it made her realize how glad she was to be here for them,=20
and all of her family. Musing, she realized the twins needed a bigger=20
bed and maybe redecorate the room, since they were no longer babies.=20
It was the last thing she recalled as she nodded off holding her=20
daughter happily in her arms.

Standing in the doorway, Chakotay watched the scene in front of his=20
dark eyes and his chest tightened in love for his family. He was not=20
used to waking up alone anymore and he worried for a moment when he=20
discovered Tamara was not in bed. Feeling her and his children in the=20
back of his mind was still new to him.=20

She had convinced him to link and make a family circle, not only for=20
security and peace of mind, should they get separated, but it=20
increased the bond between them. It was like an awareness that he=20
could concentrate on and get an inkling of how or what they were up=20
to and feeling. All four were feeling sleepy and peaceful feelings=20
washing over him soothing him with their contentment, and he smiled,=20
with a silent prayer of thanks on his lips to the spirits for the=20
gift they had given him.=20

Putting a hand on Tamara's shoulder, he let her know it was time to=20
get up and get ready for their shift. Smiling at him, she put Charlin=20
back in bed with her brother. Sam Wildman-Alaya was coming over to=20
get the twins for today so Tamara could pull her first shift on the=20
bridge with Chakotay.

Tamara was getting a chance to fly Voyager today. After nearly two=20
years of flying the shuttles, the Delta Flyer, the Seymour and=20
countless hours in flight sims with Tom Paris and Chakotay, Captain=20
Janeway felt confident enough to let the Healer have a chance at the=20
helm; for Voyager could always use a few more back up pilots, was her=20
argument to the Captain and she had agreed. She was daydreaming about=20
being at the conn as she pulled her clothes and brushed her teeth the=20
excitement crackling in her eyes.

Catching her off guard, Chakotay pulled her into his arms for a long=20
loving kiss. Responding to his kiss she wrapped her arms around his=20
waist and grabbed his ass, massaging the rounded cheeks. He groaned=20
in desire as they started playing tag with their tongues.

"Jeez, Mom, Dad! Why don't you two get a room?" Cat said in disgust=20
as she stepped out of her bedroom heading for the hall bathroom. They=20
broke apart laughing as the bathroom door shut.

The door chime sounded and Samantha was let in to care for the twins=20
and Naomi was with her waiting for Cat.

"Thanks, Sam for watching the twins," Tamara said as they left their=20
quarters to head for the Mess Hall, though it wasn't necessary, the=20
two families switched off quit frequently, till the day care crew=20
reported for duty, for there were now four other children that needed=20
their services on board, and soon, in three months, number five would=20
arrive. It had come as a surprise when Sam and Greg hooked up and=20
more so when she filed with the Captain a state of divorce decree,=20
freeing her legally and morally to marry Greg.

"Good luck at the helm, Tamara." Samantha replied, as she waddled in,=20
but glowing like a thousand watt light bulb, and watched the happy=20
couple head off to work.=20

"Nervous, Tam?" Chakotay teased as they took the turbo lift to the=20
Mess Hall.

"Yes." Came her reply short and curt.

"You'll be fine." He hugged her and felt her trembling. "Relax, you=20
know that you wouldn't be doing this if you weren't up to the task,=20
my wife or no," he said to reassure her, knowing she understood, that=20
he never played favorites when it came to the safety of his family or=20
the crew. Then held her hand as they walked together to grab=20
breakfast together.=20

Breakfast went by fast and the next thing Tamara knew she was=20
slipping into the seat at the helm of Voyager. Lt. Tom Paris was at=20
her side in case she ran into any trouble and after a few moments of=20
nervousness her fingers began to dance across the console. Tom=20
squeezed her shoulder in reassurance when she faltered for a quick=20
second and recovered.

Excitement raced through her when her confidence began to grow in her=20
ability to handle the starship. She had come to enjoy being a=20
doctor/Healer, but this=85this was something that if she had a choice=85
she'd be doing full time. She recalled when Tom let her take the helm=20
of the shuttle for the very first time and how she was hooked. It was=20
like suddenly being included in a secret club that one couldn't=20
fathom till you experienced it, and now she understood Tom and her=20
husband much better. She also understood what Chakotay had given up=20
to be the First Officer and it made her admire him even more, as if=20
there was any room left in that department.=20

"Flying, baby's flying, whoa, whoa, baby's flying," she sang softly=20
to herself, forgetting the rest of the words and hummed the rest.

"What song is that, Tamara?" Kathryn Janeway asked from behind her in=20
the command chair.

"20th century tune called "Baby's Flying", Captain," Tamara said=20
cheerfully as she got a few chuckles and smiles from the bridge crew.

"Sounds like we got another candidate for Talent Night." Janeway=20
grinned.

"Only if you want my voice to scare everyone out of the room,=20
Captain," Tamara responded. "My old man will back me up on that one."

"She's right, Captain. Tamara can't sing a note, but she's got the=20
perfect ear for music," Chakotay remarked with a full smile.
"That's right, but he can make me sing out about other things."=20
Tamara teased and she could feel his blushing through their link.=20

Harry disappear behind his console and Tom fell out of his chair in=20
his laughter while Kathryn and Tamara watched Chakotay turn different=20
shades of red while grinning at him. Tuvok merely looked disgusted at=20
the whole thing.

"However, if you're looking for a great voice, you should be looking=20
next to you, for oh, how can that man sing!" she added sweetly.=20

"Tam, you promised!" Chakotay found himself replying, forgetting=20
himself at the moment. Then looked about, seeing he was found=20
out. "Okay, so I sing in the shower=85and that's all," he stated,=20
regaining his Commanding presence. The little snicker from Janeway=20
and his wife made him shiver, for he knew=85they were plotting=20
already. //better start looking for a song, otherwise you'll be on=20
the spot unprepared, // he thought, for he knew these women too well.=20

"Tam, you should do this course change like this," Tom said bringing=20
her full attention back to the console.

"Thanks, Tom. I'm really glad you're here with me on this," she said=20
under her breath. The friendship between the two had deepened over=20
the months since B'Elanna's death and his interest and her expertise=20
in the 20th century had led to some interesting adventures on the=20
holodeck. Plus, he was apart of the family, for thought Chakotay=20
still wouldn't talk about it all this time later, this was what he=20
wanted, and after a while, so did she.=20

"You're welcome, Tam." His blue eyes bore into her green eyes and she=20
blushed when she sensed his desires and wants.

Turning her attention back to her board, she could feel Chakotay's=20
jealousy and another sort of undertone directed at Tom Paris. There=20
was an asteroid field coming up that Voyager was going to through for=20
her to practice and it was going to demand her full attention. She=20
filed Chakotay's jealousy away to mull over later, for she wasn't=20
clear, was he jealous of Tom moving on her or her moving on Tom?

There was no other feeling in the galaxy that compared to flying a=20
starship. It was a freedom until itself and nothing could top it,=20
except maybe making love with Chakotay. She was by herself at the=20
helm while Tom was manning the science station while Baxter took a=20
break. A better way to describe it was dancing among the stars.

A rough hand on her shoulder made her jump. Looking up, she found=20
Chakotay smiling down at her. "You're doing great, babe," he said in=20
a hushed tone.=20

"Thanks, sweet cheeks," she replied in an equal hushed tone, and felt=20
him move back to his seat.=20

Voyager was halfway through the asteroid field when the attack=20
started and the ship rocked under the impact of weapons fire.=20
Suddenly, Tamara found herself trying to keep the ship stabilized=20
moving around asteroids and dodging pot shots. Red alert sounded and=20
she could hear explosions behind her and off to her left.

"Tamara, get us out of here!" Chakotay yelled.

"On it, sir." Her fingers flew over the console sending the ship into=20
a barrel roll under the alien ships and up over an asteroid.

"Can you tell who is attacking us?" Janeway barked at Ensign Harry=20
Kim.

"Sensors are off line, Captain. Shields are down to 64%," Harry said=20
above the noise.

"Can we hail them?" Janeway asked.

"No response to any attempts, Captain." Tuvok answered.

"I'm getting damage reports from all over the ship," Chakotay=20
reported as he scanned his terminal. He could feel Tamara's raising=20
concern over her experience in handling the ship.

Tamara was starting to panic as Voyager began to feel sluggish and=20
drift under her inexperienced hands and taking heavy damage. She=20
needed help badly. Handling a shuttle was one thing, this was a=20
starship and the rules were different as well as size. As she looked=20
towards the science station to Tom, who was halfway out of his seat=20
leaning on the console, hoping for his help, it exploded and sent the=20
pilot hurtling towards her. With a loud wail of pain, Paris hit the=20
floor beside her out cold from his injuries. Then to make matters=20
worse, another explosion from behind her, and she no longer could=20
feel her Love's awareness=85he was hurt.=20

"Damage report," Janeway barked behind her checking on her=20
unconscious First Officer, but Tamara was busy keeping Voyager from=20
banging into any nearby debris, it was up to her to keep this crew=20
alive, and the feeling that she was failing was overwhelming her.

Risking a glance at Tom, she got an idea when she saw how close he=20
was to her with his head at her feet and could smell the burnt flesh=20
from the injuries. Kicking her shoes and socks off, she used her bare=20
feet to cradle his neck and head giving her physical contact so she=20
could try and link with him. With her hands fighting with the console=20
to keep the ship intact, she winced at the amount of pain Tom was in=20
as she dove into his mind. Keeping the pain at bay, she linked with=20
him telepathically.

//Tom, come fly with me. I need you to help me get Voyager out of=20
this asteroid field. // Tamara entered his pain-filled mind pushing=20
the agony of his burnt hands and arms off to one side.

//Tam?// He felt confused and fiery pain running down his body.

//Yes, Tom. It's me. You're injured pretty badly and technically=20
unconscious, while I'm at the helm. Voyager is adrift in the asteroid=20
field and I need you to guide me so we can get the ship out of=20
danger, for she's taking a beating, and dear one, Chakotay has been=20
hurt.// she felt Tom respond to the news with all his strength and=20
desire to help.=20

Tamara merged his mind with hers. //I can hold the pain at bay. You=20
fly and I'll do the rest. //

`How?' He embraced the link accepting the challenge, for Voyager and=20
Chakotay were in danger.

//Like this, // she showed him his image overlying with hers letting=20
him take control of her reflexes and instincts while she took control=20
of his pain. Tamara shared her confidence and trust in him when his=20
self esteem hesitated a little bit. Then he blossomed and her fingers=20
flew over the conn with his ability, grace and style no one else in=20
the galaxy could ever hope to match and soon Voyager was safe if=20
somewhat banged up.

The conn overloaded sending Tamara flying backwards and landing at=20
the feet of Captain Janeway. Darkness descended on Tamara and she=20
didn't know anymore. A slightly dazed Janeway used a site to site to=20
transport both Tom and Tamara to Sickbay, where Chakotay and a few=20
others had been already sent for care.

************

It was more of a confusion of thoughts when she awoke in Sickbay two=20
days later. Thomas Paris and Healer Tamara, their identities were=20
mixed together and it was going to take awhile to untangle the mess=20
created by the accident. Tamara was glad Tom was asleep and his=20
injuries on the mend, for she didn't think she could handle him and=20
his pain at the moment. Then she realized there was another presence=20
already there sorting through the mess, lending her a hand.

//Tuvok?// she sensed his logic and meticulous picking the aspects of=20
our identities apart and putting them where they belonged. Tom to his=20
and Tamara to hers, but the damage was done and they had bonded like=20
life mates. Guilt ran over Tamara at what she had done.

//There is no logical reason to feel guilt over this, Healer. You and=20
Mr. Paris did what you had too to save Voyager. The Commander will=20
understand. //

I had betrayed Chakotay, my love, my mate=85again; her mind whispered=20
farther back, where even Tuvok couldn't touch. //I hope so, // she=20
projected, trying to keep her wits about her. //We'll just have to=20
wait and see. Is this going to take much longer, Tuvok? // Tamara=20
asked feeling sleepy again.

//Go to sleep, Tamara. A deep healing sleep. // Tuvok projected, and=20
then continued on with the difficult task at hand.=20

Chakotay was sitting on the bridge staring at the viewscreen his PADD=20
forgotten in his hand. He could feel something wrong in his awareness=20
of Tamara. There were now two other presences in her mind and he was=20
dimly sensing mass confusion.=20

Her feeling of betrayal hit him in the gut like a hefty punch=20
followed by a wave of despair and guilt. It was more than his mind=20
could handle, for he hadn't learned any of the techniques that she=20
and Tuvok had for blocking unwanted thoughts, for he never saw the=20
need, and so when the wave hit him, his mind overloaded, he fell to=20
the deck in a faint.

"Chakotay," Janeway exclaimed not able to catch him in time. "Janeway=20
to transporter room. Beam Commander Chakotay directly to Sickbay."

Chakotay was transported to Sickbay and placed on the bio-bed next to=20
Tamara. The EMH ran a scan over him and administered a hypo spray to=20
his neck. He awoke to find the Doctor and Lt. Tuvok standing over him.

"What happened?" the First Officer asked in confusion.

 "You fainted, otherwise you're fine. You can leave when you are=20
ready," the EMH said brusquely as he returned to Tom Paris' bedside.

"Commander, I need to speak with you concerning Healer Tamara and Mr.=20
Paris," Tuvok stated as Chakotay sat up swinging his legs to one side=20
of the bed. "But first, you should know, your fainting was due to an=20
emotional overload received by your wife. I recommend sessions on=20
techniques to prevent this from occurring again. However, as for your=20
wife and Lieutenant Paris..."=20

"What about them, Tuvok?" He was a little blunt with the Vulcan.

"Are you aware of how we got out of danger the other day?" Tuvok=20
asked, wondering just how deep the bond between the Commander and his=20
wife went.

"No. I thought Tamara got us out of danger with a bit of fancy flying=20
on her own." He rubbed the back of his neck as he glanced at Tamara=20
still asleep on the next bed.

"The Healer established a mind link with Mr. Paris so he could guide=20
her in getting Voyager out of harm's way. By blocking the pain of his=20
injuries, Mr. Paris was in fact using Tamara's body to fly Voyager=20
out of danger." The Vulcan explained his eyes on the Commander.

"I don't see what the problem is. It looks like Tamara did what she=20
had to too get Voyager to safety." Chakotay was puzzled.

"When the helm exploded and Tamara was injured, she had not broken=20
the link with Mr. Paris. Although unconscious, they were still=20
linked. I became aware of their distress last night and separated the=20
link in most part for them." The Vulcan stopped as if unable to find=20
the right words.

"What do you mean by the most part?" Chakotay demanded with a sinking=20
feeling in his gut and a worried look in Tamara's direction and=20
Tom's. They were both asleep.

"They have bonded on several levels and that was the distress you=20
felt from your wife that cause you to faint. She feels like she has=20
betrayed you and the guilt is overwhelming her despite my telling her=20
that it was not anyone's fault."

"Can the bond be broken?" he asked with concern.

"Not without causing them a great deal of pain and anguish,=20
Commander. I would not recommend that course of action." He raised an=20
eyebrow at the suggestion.

"Thank you, Tuvok." Chakotay dismissed the Security Chief needing=20
time to think. He walked from the biobed he was on to stand near his=20
wife, while looking on to see Tom being tended too in the distance by=20
the EMH, his heart and mind filled with some confusion, as he sorted=20
through the options that lay out before him and his family, which=20
seemed to include Tom Paris even more than before.=20

Feeling his presence, Tamara woke up. "Chakotay?" Tears welled up in=20
her eyes. He approached her with no expression on his face. //Oh=20
Spirits! I finally fucked up enough that he's going to dump me. //=20
her mind cried. "I'm sorry."

Chakotay bent over and kissed her. "There's nothing to be sorry=20
about, baby. You did what you had to for the crew and ship."

The tension drained from her body in relief. "What about Tom?"

"What about him, baby? You need your rest." He replied with a loving=20
smile, for he knew the answers he needed in his heart, and when she=20
was ready, he would let her know.=20

"I agree." The Doctor said as he injected a sedative in her neck.

"I'll get even." She fell asleep with an image of decompiling the=20
doctor's matrix.

"Doctor, what is the full extent of Tom's injuries?" Chakotay asked=20
as he turned to gaze at the blond pilot lying still on the bio bed=20
next to Tamara.

"Mr. Paris suffered very extensive burns to his hands, arms,=20
shoulders and chest. I've nearly lost him twice to cardiac arrest.=20
Regeneration of his hands and lower arms is going to take a long time=20
and than he'll need physical therapy to relearn the use of his hands=20
and limbs. He is going to require long term care for this sort of=20
injury, Commander." The Doctor said.

"Can he get the long term care he needs here in Sick Bay or would a=20
family unit be better for Tom?" Chakotay asked knowing through the=20
link she would easily agree to what he was planning, thanking the=20
Spirits for her love and understanding.

"Are you suggesting your family, Commander?" The Doctor asked as he=20
ran a fresh set of scans over the Healer, relieved that she was fully=20
recovered from her physical injuries.

"Could be. I would need to talk to Tamara. I made the suggestion=20
because we all know how much Mr. Paris hates Sick Bay, Doctor," he=20
lied easily.=20

"That is certainly true. Your family would be a good place for Mr.=20
Paris to regain his health, Commander. I'll make the recommendation=20
to the Captain," The EMH was satisfied with her readings. "Tamara can=20
go home this evening and return to duty in 24 hours."

"Tay?" Tamara woke up fighting the sedative; for she had to speak=20
with her husband...she had too.=20

"What, baby?" Her green eyes opened and regarded his dark eyes full=20
of love and she felt relieved.

"What about Tom? Can he come home with us, please?" she=20
pleaded. "Wolf, horse and falcon all together," she mumbled.  Time=20
for the healing to begin, to make things right," she murmured some=20
more as she fell back asleep from the vision in her dream. There was=20
Chakotay with his wolf, she with her stallion and Tom watching a=20
golden falcon in the blue sky while children crawled at their feet.

"He's coming home, baby, don't worry. I'll make the arrangements." He=20
kissed her forehead and left Sickbay to talk to the Captain.

************

Tom Paris awoke for the first time since he had been injured two=20
weeks prior and was feeling pretty groggy. With his fuzzy mind, he=20
became aware of no feeling or movement below his neck. What was going=20
on? Than he felt something in the back of his mind, awareness with a=20
strong feeling of protectiveness and love for him.

"Hey, Dancer. Welcome back to the land of the living." Tamara said as=20
she ran her fingers through his red-gold hair.

"Tam?" His throat was dry and she quickly brought him a drink of=20
water.

"Just sips, Tom. You've been out for nearly fifteen days." She gave=20
him another sip of water. "You were injured pretty badly."

"Is that you in my head?" Tom asked hoarsely. He could smell her=20
scent like spices and roses.

"Yes, we accidentally bonded while we flying Voyager together. We got=20
mixed up and Tuvok had to separate our identities about twelve days=20
ago." Tamara explained quietly knowing if they talked too loud the=20
EMH would come online and she wanted some private time with Tom.

"How bad, Tam?" His blue eyes pleaded with her green ones filling=20
full of tears and despair.

"You suffered extensive burns on your chest, shoulders, arms and your=20
hands. We nearly lost you twice to cardiac arrest," Her tears were=20
echoing his own and she felt the calming influence of Chakotay behind=20
them. "The Doctor induced a coma while I worked on regenerating your=20
arms and hopefully your hands."

"Will I fly again, Tam?"

"I don't know, baby. It's going to take a few more weeks to regrow=20
your hands and than extensive physical therapy. Why don't we take it=20
one step at a time?" She wiped the tears from his eyes.

"Why didn't you just let me die?" Despair rolled over him and with a=20
strong feeling of helplessness following which made Tamara's gut roll=20
in turmoil.

"Because `we' love you and now our family wouldn't be complete=20
without you, Tom." Chakotay said softly in his low melodic voice=20
surprising both of them.

"Cha?" Tom questioned in confusion and a sudden spark of hope filled=20
him.

"I know this isn't the best place for this conversation, but I've had=20
feelings for you for a very long time now. It took almost losing you=20
two to wake me up. If you died now, it would not only hurt Tam very=20
badly because of the bond you share together, but it would break my=20
heart." Chakotay admitted laying a hand on Tom's cheek and stroking=20
it with the back of his hand. Tom found himself leaning into the=20
caress.

"Tam, why can't I feel anything?" Tom asked in anguish changing the=20
subject when he suddenly got scared that a nightmare of his might=20
come true.

"I have the nerves blocked so you can sleep naturally and not full of=20
drugs. The Doctor and I have been butting heads over you for a few=20
days now concerning the treatment of your hands. We started the=20
physical therapy on your arms several days ago." She sent a wave of=20
love, not only from her but Chakotay, and a hope of a future with him=20
in their lives through the bond. Feeling the truth behind their=20
words, he relaxed slightly still a little apprehensive. "Since you=20
are awake, I'm going to unblock the nerves and see how much pain=20
there is. It's going to hurt, Tom."

"I'm used to pain in my life."

His body was on fire and he screamed for relief as a wave of cool=20
healing washed over him and the nerves were healed. There was feeling=20
in his legs, hips, chest, everywhere but his lower arms and hands,=20
which were heavily bandaged. When he became aware of surroundings, he=20
found himself in Chakotay's arms while Tamara had her hands on his=20
face and head; if he wasn't in so much pain, he would have been in=20
heaven.

"At least he can get up and start getting around again. We can take=20
him home today, Handsome," Tamara was telling Chakotay as she=20
finished and yawned suddenly as fatigue set in.

"The new quarters are ready and all of `our' stuff has been moved.=20
Sam and Ayala are taking the children so we can get Tom settled in,"=20
he replied while holding Tom and rubbing his lower back until the=20
trembling stopped, letting his love for the young man flow from his=20
fingers.

"Don't I get a say in the matter?" Tom snapped feeling like his life=20
was spinning out of control again like it had been at the time of=20
B'Elanna's death.

"Sure you do, Tom. Do you want to stay here in Sick Bay or go home=20
with us?" Tamara cocked an eyebrow at him. She felt his indecision=20
and the cocky attitude snap into place for a brief moment and than he=20
relaxed his defenses as he looked up at the man still rubbing his=20
back with care. Laying his head on Chakotay's shoulder, he answered=20
with a sigh, "Home with you."

Tamara placed a cortical monitor on his neck behind his ear and he=20
glared at her sideways. "Doctor insisted. We had to compromise on a=20
few things and this was one of them."

"We'll do a site to site, Tam. You look exhausted." Chakotay said as=20
he lifted Tom off the bio bed with ease and gave him a gentle hug.

"You'll get no argument from me today, Tay." Tamara agreed as she=20
tapped her com badge. "Healer to transporter room. Site to site for=20
myself, Mr. Paris and Commander Chakotay to our new quarters please."

"Yes, ma'am." They rematerialized in the new First Officer's quarters.

"These don't look like your quarters, Cha?" Tom commented as he=20
looked around.

"We took over the Chief Medical Officer's quarters and the=20
observation lounge next to it to make room for our ever-growing=20
family. We rearranged it into a new home for all of us." Chakotay=20
placed the pilot on the couch in the new living area, his eyes=20
meeting teary blue, as he smiled how much he was touched by the=20
sediment.

"Who moved my office, Tay?" Tamara bellowed from her desk in the=20
corner.

"I did and no one else. All right?" He grinned at a bemused Tom.

"Now, I'll never find anything." She snorted while rummaging through=20
the desk drawers.

"What are you trying to find, Tam?" Chakotay asked giving Tom one of=20
his big smiles complete with dimples, knowing that his wife had an=20
organized chaos to her desk, and he sometimes cleaned it up just for=20
the fun of watching her fuss; she wasn't the only one with a wicked=20
sense of humor in the family.

"The PADD that had the holoprogram I was working on. I had a thought=20
to add and now it's gone. I've been working on that for over a=20
month." She complained. "Ah, the hell with it."

"Now what?" Chakotay smirked while Tom choked on a laugh, suddenly=20
seeing Chakotay's amusement and the realization that the older man=20
did this on purpose to his wife.

"Nothing. Will you two be all right while I take a nap?" She eyed=20
them suspiciously knowing that the two of them would be exploring=20
each other before much longer.

"Yes, Tam. We'll be fine." Chakotay sat next to a blushing Tom=20
running his fingers through his hair. "Go to sleep."

"In that case, I'll sleep in the spare bedroom so you can make as=20
much noise as you want too." They could hear her laughter as the door=20
closed behind her, even as their lips met in a much desired, long=20
over due kiss.

************
End of Part Eleven
************


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************
Part Twelve
************
See Part One for disclaimer

Chakotay and Tom sat next to each other on the couch in their new=20
quarters not
quite sure what to say next, after sharing such a sweet kiss. Feeling=20
a little tired and slightly brave, Tom leaned over and rested his=20
blonde head on the big broad shoulder. Chakotay relaxed enjoying the=20
closeness of Tom's body. He turned his face and kissed the top of the=20
blonde head on another sudden impulse.

"Welcome home, Tom," he whispered as he nuzzled the soft hair. "I'm=20
glad you're here."

"Really?" Tom questioned, lifting his eyes to meet dark intense eyes=20
hoping that this wasn't some absurd dream.

"Really, Tommy; it feels right. And just like Tam said, you're=20
family." Chakotay hoped his words were reassuring to the younger man.

The brilliant smile lit up his face and Chakotay basked in the glow.=20
Mindful of the bandaged hands, he wrapped his arms around the blonde=20
and hugged him gently smiling all the while.

"Kiss me again," Tom said quietly desire making his cock twitch.

"Gladly," Chakotay whispered. Then as their lips met once more, all=20
doubts of this being simply a dream shattered as the fire of passion=20
filled their souls.=20

"Cha, Love me." Tom begged his cock hardening at the thought of being=20
under this man. "Make me yours."
After a long intense kiss, Chakotay slowly undressed Tom and helped=20
him to lie down on the bed.

"Are you sure about this, Tom?" the big man asked not wanting to hurt=20
the younger man, thought his hands could not stop caressing the=20
creamy pale flesh beneath him.

Taking a deep breath, Tom told him, "I need this, Cha. I need you and=20
I've wanted you for the longest time, that if you don't I'm going to=20
explode."

Kneeling carefully on the bed next to his young lover, Chakotay moved=20
the bandaged hands gently above Tom's head.

"Not fair," Tom protested with building frustration.

"What's not fair?" Chakotay asked as he bent over Tom's lightly=20
furred chest and gently bit his left nipple.=20

Gasping in pleasure Tom arched upwards into Chakotay's=20
ministrations. "I can't touch you, it's frustrating," he complained=20
hissing in pleasure as large hands roamed at will over his pale=20
flesh. Nothing compared to the feeling of being loved by Chakotay,=20
except maybe Tamara and Chakotay.

"Tommy, there is more than one way to touch," Chakotay purred. "But=20
for right now I just want to explore and mark my territory," Chakotay=20
purred than latched onto the long pale throat sucking and biting,=20
leaving marks indicating where he had been.

"Your territory? What will Tam say about that?" Tom teased in between=20
gasps of sensations, loving the thought of being claimed by this man.

"Might share later, mine for now," the husky voice answered as his=20
thought process dwindled away, as his kisses and his caresses moved=20
down the lean slender body. Flicking out his tongue he caught a drop=20
of his love's cream, "My Tommy taste good," he whispered, then moved=20
in to collect all of the wonder into his mouth.=20

A hot wet mouth on his cock made Tom give up any reason to talk=20
except for groans. "More, Cha, more!"

When Tom was close to the edge, Chakotay backed off to let the=20
trembling man quiet down. He wanted to make this last. Draping his=20
body across Tom's he pulled him into another round of kissing,=20
letting his Tommy taste himself on his lips while conveying all the=20
emotions he felt into his actions.
"I want to be inside you. I need you." He got out in between kisses=20
his hands roaming up and down Tom's sides. "Let me love you, Tommy,=20
the way I've dreamed about?"=20

"Do it, Cha. Please don't make me wait anymore." Tom arched upwards=20
and bucked his hips against Chakotay's. Their cocks touched sending=20
shock waves through their bodies.

Breathing hard, Chakotay reached into the nightstand for the lube=20
while staring intently into the glazed blue eyes beneath him, feeling=20
a connection that words could never explain. Sitting up slowly, he=20
resettled himself between the long pale legs and slick fingers began=20
to prepare the small tight opening for his cock. Tom clamped down=20
with his anal muscles wanting more when fingers brushed his prostate=20
nearly sending him into orbit.

Tom was writhing in passion and wiggled impatiently while Chakotay=20
slid a pillow under his hips to have easier access.

"Please, Cha. Take me and make me yours," he panted giving up any=20
pretense at thoughts and let the sensations overtake him, for all he=20
could recall was how badly he wanted to be possessed by this man and=20
now it was happening.

Placing his cock at the entrance to Tom's body, he pushed his way in=20
a little at a time until his full length was in that tight hot=20
velvety channel. He held still until he was sure that Tom was=20
adjusted to his cock being in him. Moving slowly in and out in a=20
rhythmic motion, Chakotay knew he wasn't going to last long when he=20
felt the bed dip as another weight settled in beside them.

"You two are having way too much fun without me," Tamara commented,=20
in a sultry voice as she dropped her robe on the floor, then she=20
claimed a kiss from both of them.

Tamara could tell how close Chakotay was to the edge and Tom was not=20
too far behind him so she began stroking Tom's cock and playing with=20
his nipples, while being aroused by the sight of her husband's bronze=20
sweaty body taking the porcelain flesh beneath him.

"Link us, Tam." Chakotay gasped. "Feel it all."

Within seconds, she established a three way surface telepathic link=20
so they could all share their feelings and pleasures of the moment.=20
They were both ready to reach orgasm when Tamara reached out and held=20
them there at the edge intensifying the pleasure when Tom wailed. She=20
reached down between her bare legs and very swiftly brought herself=20
to join the two men in orgasm.

No one remembered who yelled the loudest when Chakotay came deep in=20
Tom's ass, while Tom erupted over his stomach and Tamara her hand.=20
Her own juices flowing down her thighs, Tamara nearly passed out.=20
Chakotay did pass out collapsing on top of Tom who was barely=20
conscious himself; nothing had ever been this intense in his life.

Removing her arm from between their bodies, Tamara pushed Chakotay's=20
limp form off of Tom so he could breath, with a loving smile at him=20
and a groggy Tom Paris. Going into the bathroom, she cleaned herself=20
off and brought a warm washcloth and towel back to the bed. She=20
cleaned Chakotay up while he was still out of it and kissed him when=20
she was done. Then she turned her attention to the blue-eyed pilot=20
gazing up at her in adoration as she washed his stomach and ass.=20
Tossing the washrag and towel off the bed, she curled up beside the=20
younger man and gathered him in her arms to cuddle and kiss.

"Are your hands all right, Tom?" she examined the bandages concern=20
that they may have been bumped or re-injured with their activities.

"They're fine, Tam." Tom whispered still recovering from the=20
intensity of it all. He could feel her love for him through the bond=20
they shared and now he could faintly pick up Chakotay as well. It was=20
like there were several bonds all at once. Her and Chakotay, Her and=20
himself, and from what he experienced before she joined them,=20
Chakotay and himself, and the fierceness of their love for him=20
threatened to overwhelm him, but Tamara kept him calmed down using=20
her emotions as their center.=20

"You smell so good, Tom," she said as he breathed in deep. Then=20
Tamara began to explore his neck and ear looking for sensitive areas=20
that she could exploit and rekindle the burning embers back into a=20
raging fire. Right below his left ear, gently nipping and sucking=20
made Tom squeal and his newly aroused cock stood up and was demanding=20
attention of the worst kind. .

"Feels so good, Tam. I want to feel myself come inside you," Tom said=20
as he wrapped his arms around her.

Careful of his bandaged hands, she rolled over on her back and let=20
Tom brace himself with his elbows on either side of her ribs. Using=20
her hand, she guided his cock into her.

"Yes, Tom. Harder," she managed to get out before his mouth descended=20
on hers. They moved together in tandem unaware they were being=20
intently watched.

Watching them made Chakotay realize how lucky he was to have them in=20
his life and his family felt complete. Right now, he didn't care if=20
they never made it back to the Alpha Quadrant, as everything he=20
needed or wanted was right here on Voyager.
Sitting up, he reached over and touched Tom and Tamara both=20
gently, "Don't move for a moment I want to join you."

"How are you going to do that, Cha?" Tom asked lying still on=20
Tamara's flushed body. He could feel her inner muscles twitching=20
around his cock sending delicious feelings of pleasure up his spine.

"Tam, close your legs and keep them straight and Tom spread your legs=20
as wide as you can," the bronze man explained as he lubed his cock=20
moving to straddle Tamara's legs and found an acceptable level to=20
ease his cock into Tom's ass once again. He was careful not to let=20
his weight lean on Tom too much.

Tom was going mad with intense passions weaving through his body. He=20
felt fully stuffed with Chakotay's cock up his ass and his own cock=20
buried and caught in Tamara's center sending dual sensations through=20
him. The pleasure was growing so intense he thought he was going to=20
die; except he was already in heaven.

Slowly, they started a new rhythm letting Tom set the pace, then all=20
felt the feeling of when Tamara reach an orgasm and then continuing=20
breathing hard from the extra stimulation. Tom reached his second of=20
the afternoon coming with a shout while hearing Chakotay roar in his=20
ear. Collapsing on Tamara's chest, Tom passed out this time and she=20
held him in her arms until he came around while Chakotay got fresh=20
towels to clean them up with.

Curling up with Chakotay in the middle, Tamara and Tom used the big=20
man as a pillow and they all started to fall asleep, content for the=20
moment, and no one wanting it to end. Tamara felt blessed for all she=20
had gained after all those years of hell, and said a silent prayer=20
for it to never end. Chakotay felt complete, as if a piece of him he=20
didn't really understand was missing was now back, and he would never=20
let it go again. And for Tom as he drifted off, it felt like coming=20
home=85

Chakotay woke up several hours later feeling moisture on his chest=20
and glanced down to see tears in a pair of blue eyes that he could=20
drown in. He began rubbing Tom's back to offer comfort.

"What's wrong, baby?" he asked worried that Tom doubted himself all=20
over again.

"I love you and Tam so much. I don't understand why you would include=20
me in your family?" he wished he could touch the big guy's face, but=20
knew he could do nothing until his hands were finished healing so he=20
just leaned in closer on his chest.

"We `both' love you. You and Tamara are bonded as life-mates and to=20
break that bond would cause irreparable damage to both of you and I=20
refuse to see either of you hurt in anyway," he kissed the top of=20
Tom's head a wave of protectiveness filling him and continued, "You=20
have qualities we both admire in you, such as; you're smart, brave=20
and the strongest person we know. You have honor, integrity and=20
compassion. The best of it all is that you make us laugh."

Tom blushed with embarrassment and ducked his head because he=20
couldn't stand the intensity of the dark eyes. The storm of emotions=20
in his soul confused him and it woke Tamara up when she felt it.

"I see you found a way to make him speechless, Tay," Tamara said with=20
amusement in her voice. "He still doesn't quite believe it yet. I=20
guess we'll just have to love him harder until he knows it's a fact."

"Maybe if we kept him in bed and fucked him for the next few weeks=20
solid he may get the point?" Chakotay suggested provocatively.

"Tay!" Tom sounded shocked at the comment. He hadn't realized the=20
Commander was quite a lustful creature, especially when it came to=20
Tamara and himself now included.

"Sounds good to me. That way we could have him anytime day or night=20
and in any position we can possibly think of," she joined in the=20
teasing making him blush even harder. //Ah, you got to love fair=20
skin, // she chuckled mentally, glad it wasn't her.=20

"He is pretty special, Tam. Do you think he'll believe us if we hold=20
him down and tell him and show him that we want him to stay,"=20
Chakotay said kissing Tamara as she sat up and stretched.

"I'll stay," Tom replied, tears still in his eyes, but this time for=20
joy. "I think both of you are special and I love you so much."  He=20
was rewarded with a deep loving kiss from both his loves.=20

"How about something to eat, guys? I'm hungry," Tamara stated as she=20
got up and put on a robe while heading for the replicator.

"Pizza?" Tom smiled as he sat up.

"Pizza it is," Tamara said as she programmed the replicator for one=20
large vegetarian pizza, garlic breadsticks and a large pitcher of=20
beer and milk for her wimp of a husband, (but only when it came to=20
his bizarre drinking habit with pizza).

Chakotay and Tom came out of the bedroom wearing robes and joined=20
Tamara at the dining table.
"Hey, who's the milk for? I thought you said the kids were not coming=20
back tonight?" Tom smirked.=20

"Stuff it, Paris," Chakotay growled as he sat down and took the milk=20
and the pizza. "You shouldn't knock it till you've tried it, plus,=20
you know I don't care to drink."=20

Tamara laughed and pulled out a chair for Tom, "don't worry, I've=20
teased him about it since day one, but=85it's what he likes=85I can live=20
with that."=20

Tom looked at the man he adored for years and saw that Chakotay=20
wasn't really mad, and smiled, "I can too."=20

They made short work of dinner with Tamara and Chakotay taking turns=20
feeding Tom bites of pizza and garlic bread. Then after dinner and a=20
long hot shower, the threesome tumbled back into bed, made love and=20
slept in perfect harmony with one another.

************

"Tam," Chakotay whispered in her ear early the next morning. She was=20
wrapped around Tom with her head on his chest. "Wake up, honey."

"What is it, Tay?" Tamara whispered still half-asleep as he brushed=20
the red hair out of her sleepy eyes meeting soft brown.

"We've received a distress signal and I'm needed on the bridge. I've=20
got to go," he kept his voice low to avoid waking Tom.

"Do they need medical help?" She was instantly alert and sat up=20
slowly, also not wanting to wake Tom.

"We don't know and it will be several hours before we arrive so just=20
stick to the schedule for now, babe," He kissed her on the lips. "Do=20
you need any help with Tom?" he asked, for it was clear in his eyes=20
that he didn't want to leave either one of them at the moment.=20

"We'll be fine, handsome. Go play First Officer and I'll call you if=20
any problems arise," she assured him hoping to ease the look of worry=20
on his bronze face.

Chakotay gave her one of his killer smiles, which left her weak in=20
the knees while he fastened his jacket. He knelt beside her for one=20
more kiss.

"Do you think he'll stay, Tay?" Tamara asked filled with her own=20
doubt.

"I certainly hope so, baby. Like you said with Tom here our family=20
feels complete... However, the final decision is his;" he told her=20
honestly while kissing her soft lips once more, "all we can do is=20
love him and pray for the best."  With a wink he exited the room.=20

"Nice ass," she said watching him leave their bedroom.

"A very nice ass," Tom opened his eyes and grinned at his bond mate.

"I suppose you heard everything," she said and gazed at the long=20
lithe blonde blushing fiercely under her stare. "You're beautiful=20
when you blush, baby."

"Yeah and I want to stay," he stammered out reaching up and pulling=20
her down on top of him while kissing her senseless. Snuggling, they=20
went back to sleep.

Then the alarm went off waking the couple up and slowly they got up=20
and took a shower and got dressed with Tamara doing most of the work.=20
Tom was a little upset at how much help he had to have, but kept his=20
mouth shut not realizing that Tamara could sense his feelings through=20
their bond. But she knew that with her and Chakotay, Tom would never=20
know what hit him and would be better before he knew it.=20
=09
************

The distress signal came from an asteroid belt too thick for Voyager=20
to maneuver, so Commander Chakotay, being the next best pilot after=20
Tom, was to command and guide the Delta flyer to lend aid. The aliens=20
in need were called the Pakor, and Janeway had commented privately to=20
Chakotay that it was unusual to find a ship ran by only females, but=20
not that strange.=20

Chakotay of course made an obvious quip, "What makes you think they=20
are female?" for thought the aliens were slender like humanoid=20
females, they didn't have the same body shape, as far as breast, so=20
it was not proper to make assumptions based on human anatomy, since=20
they have been wrong before. Of course, if a race didn't offer a hint=20
into its gender base, it was rude to ask, and thus not mentioned.=20
This was the case with the Pakor.=20

They had a caramel complexion similar to Chakotay's along with=20
something that gave the skin a natural look of glitter inner mixed.=20
Their eyes were a range from blue to black, similar to human, as=20
their hair ranged from blond to black as well. Their facial features=20
were also similar to humans, except for the markings along their=20
cheekbones and jaw-line that were placed on like ritual or clan=20
tattoos sometime in their life. The markings were similar but=20
different, and to some it enhanced their looks, others it did not.=20

Chakotay maneuvered the asteroid belt easily and docked the shuttle=20
that carried himself, Harry, Samantha Wildman, and Seven of Nine. The=20
Pakor seemed friendly but reserved people when they first boarded,=20
for they were sizing up the strangers, and everyone from the shuttle=20
understood this, and so didn't take it personally.=20

They were approached by what they assumed was their leader, CA'kal,=20
who walked up to Samantha, mistaking her for the leader. "Welcome,=20
Commander," the strong but soft voice replied, still giving nothing=20
away as to gender.=20

Samantha turned to Chakotay; the move alone was enough to render the=20
Pakor's error in judgment, and with what seemed like a slight scowl,=20
turned to face who was indicated to be in charge. "You=85are Commander=20
Chakotay?" the Pakor inquired.=20

"Yes, I am, and this is my crew; Captain Janeway sent us to help with=20
your engine difficulties. I hope there isn't a problem," he asked=20
with much tact.=20

"CA'kal, introduce me," a voice full of authority echoed from the=20
archway.=20

The crew of Voyager turned to see another Pakor, dressed in fine=20
black silk and gold trim tunic and matching pants enters the docking=20
area. They strode in with confidence, a regal bearing to their=20
nature, as a strong but delicate hand came up and brushed soft brown=20
hair behind his ear, allowing his deep dark blue eyes to settle upon=20
the Commander.=20

"This is our One, Javen Wyst," CA'kal stated with much pride and gave=20
a bow, as did the others in the room.=20

Chakotay seeing that this was a sign of respect followed suit, as did=20
the others of his crew. "Commander Chakotay of the Starship Voyager;=20
it is an honor to meet you," he replied easily.=20

"I would say the honor is all mine=85Commander," Javen said, as he=20
reached out and placed an index finger on Chakotay's chin, pulling it=20
up so they could see eye to eye. "Definitely an honor."=20

Chakotay was glad he didn't have fair skin like his wife and husband,=20
or he'd be red from head to toe in response to the scrutiny he was=20
receiving at the moment from this alien. Seeing it was okay for him=20
to stand, he did. "Thank you. I'm sure that if you were to show my=20
people around and fill them in, we'll be able to give you a hand in=20
getting your ship fixed."=20

"That would be perfect," Javen smiled softly at the Commander. "Then=20
afterwards you and your people should come to the Pakor home world=20
were we can properly thank you," Javen replied. Then he stepped back,=20
letting CA'kal lead them all to the engineering, eyes locked on the=20
Commander the whole time.=20

************

It had taken five hours to fix the engine problem, but all were=20
pleased with the results when it was done. It turned out that the=20
Pakor were technically advanced in a lot of areas, and were able to=20
make and create transit tunnels through space, to cut on travel time.=20
The only problem was that they were too small for Voyager to fit, but=20
once the Federation ship was in Pakor territory, a three and half=20
month journey, they would see about adapting the technology to=20
accommodate the larger vessel. With this technology, they could be=20
home in months, not the many years that lie before them.=20

It was a deal made in heaven, and to celebrate, Javen Wyst, their=20
One, ordered a meal in the honor of the crew that helped them, but it=20
didn't take long before the commander found himself alone in Javen's=20
quarters, sipping Pakor wine, listening to their music and learning=20
about their culture from Javen personally, while the crew was treated=20
like kings elsewhere.=20

************

Tom was sitting in the living room, waiting for Tamara to feed him=20
dinner, for it was too soon after his injury, that he couldn't hold=20
anything. He was feeling irritable about being needy, but then he=20
recalled last night, being in this good woman's arms, and most=20
importantly, Chakotay's as well.=20

He gave a heavy sigh, for he was never the patient sort, and then a=20
huge smile when Tamara placed down a plate of grilled cheese and a=20
bowl of Tomato soup hot and plain, just the way he liked it. "How'd=20
you know?" he grinned.=20

Tamara grinned herself, and pointed to her temple.=20

"Oh, yeah the link," he stated wondering what else she knew about him

"No, silly," she laughed. "Tay mentioned it, and I remembered. So,=20
open up, here comes the choo-choo train," she teased as she picked up=20
the large spoon of soup.=20

Tom laughed, "I'm not a baby." But he opened his mouth anyway and=20
took the soup for he was hungry.=20

"Tell Tay that," she laughed warmly.=20

Tom's insecurities started to get the better of him, his eyes looking=20
very concerned, "You mean, he thinks=85"

Seeing that Tom misunderstood, "No, that's not what I meant. I'm his=20
baby, and now so are you. That's what he says as one of his terms of=20
endearment, you'll see," she finished, glad to see that was cleared=20
up. //Tom still has self esteem issues// she mused to herself as she=20
continued to feed the young man.=20
The food was delicious, but he had to ask, "Tam=85ah=85could I have=85
something else to drink?" he blushed, hoping his request wasn't too=20
much.=20

"Tom, when are you going to learn, you are part of this family=85so yes=20
of course you can. You're dehydrated from the burns, so it makes a=20
lot of sense to need more fluids. Just hold on a second," she stated=20
as she got up from the table.=20

Tamara was four steps away from the table when she stopped, something=20
was wrong. Tom looked at her and was about to ask too, but then he=20
felt it or worse=85he didn't feel it=85Chakotay's link was gone.  He felt=20
himself pale, as he turned to Tamara whose face was tight with=20
concern, and her eyes distant, searching. Tom knew that was what she=20
was doing, and felt helpless in this matter, and cursed his=20
condition.=20

Tamara moved back and sat down, "I=85I can't find him," she stated with=20
disbelief."=20

"Call the Captain," Tom suggested.=20

"Yes," she stated, her brain kicking into gear, "Healer to Captain=20
Janeway."=20

"Janeway here, go ahead."=20

Her voice was calm, so either she didn't know or it was something=20
else, "Captain, is there a problem with the rescue team?"=20

There was a pause, "Not that I'm aware, why?"

"I=85I lost contact with my husband," she stated, not knowing how to=20
explain what Chakotay considered personal and private.=20

Fortunately Kathryn understood, since her and Chakotay were best=20
friends, "Stand by," she replied, letting Tamara know she was going=20
to check it out.=20

She and Tom sat quietly at the dinner table, worried about the older=20
man they both loved, and those concerns flowed freely between the=20
bonds present between them.=20

"It'll be all right," Tom said, trying hard to believe it, for=20
Chakotay was as indestructible as he was=85or more so, considering his=20
current condition.=20

"I hope so, but what could have cut or blocked the link like that?=20
And what is taking so long!" she huffed as she stood and started=20
pacing, debating calling the bridge once more.=20

Tamara did call the bridge twice more, the second time; she was=20
informed that they were finally able to make contact with the rescue=20
party, and that there was a lot of interference from the asteroid=20
belt. Tamara was beside herself, for it had been an hour, an eternity=20
for she noticed the difference that not having his ever-calming=20
presence did for her and Tom.=20

"Samantha says they're fine, but I've asked her to contact the=20
Commander and have him contact us directly. She said there is a lot=20
of radiation in the belt, and very strong shielding in certain areas=20
of the ship, so stand by," Janeway stated.=20

She was about to snap that she was `standing' by for she was too=20
upset to sit, but a gentle touch from Tom, who used his cheek on her=20
arm, helped her to regroup and wait.=20

Ten minutes more went by, than like a flood, there it was=85back,=20
strong as ever=85Chakotay! She was so overjoyed she forgot about Tom's=20
hands and jumped in his lap, "he's back! He's okay!" she shouted and=20
started kissing Tom's face. Then she sensed the pain he was in and=20
got up, "sorry."=20

Tom kicked the pain aside, for he too could now feel Chakotay's=20
presence through Tamara, and he was overjoyed himself. "Don't worry=20
about it."=20

"Chakotay to Tamara."=20

"Oh, Tay, I was so worried, are you all right?" she asked, tears of=20
relief falling down her face.=20

"I'm fine, what seems to be the problem?"=20

Tamara looked at Tom, //didn't he feel us missing? // She thought and=20
could see that Tom felt the same way. "Our link=85it was=85interrupted."=20

"I'm sorry, Tam. I think it was the shielding in the room I was in. I=20
didn't realize=85" he stopped talking, "I'm sorry for making you worry.=20
I'll be back soon, Chakotay out."=20

This didn't settle very well with her or Tom, but they would have to=20
wait till his return to deal with it. "What did he mean he didn't=20
realize!" she snapped, after the com was closed.=20

Feeling the anger and hurt, Tom tried to defuse some of this, "it is=20
possible that he was very busy and the link was not something he was=20
concentrating on. He said before he had to think about it to feel the=20
link, right?"=20

Tamara growled, for Tom made a valid point, and there went her bitch=20
session with her husband. She took a coming breath, "Well, at least=20
he's all right," she stated, and recalled it was dinnertime, and=20
Tom's was cold. "I'll warm that up for you," she said, not caring one=20
way or another if Tom wanted it heated, she needed to be busy.=20

Tom sat back and sighed. It was stressful, unpredictable, and he=20
wouldn't change places with anyone he knew.=20

************
End of Part Twelve
************


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************
Part Thirteen
************
See Part One for disclaimer

Soon everything was back to normal and they developed a routine=20
adjusting to having Tom in their lives. When he wasn't off to an=20
early meeting, Chakotay would get Tom ready while Tamara tackled the=20
kids. When they reached Sickbay for Tamara's shift, after dropping=20
off the kids with the appointed sitter of the day, they would do a=20
physical therapy session. Following a short rest, Tamara would do=20
another healing on the pilot's hands encouraging the regrowth of=20
muscle, bone and skin tissue especially on his elegant fingers which=20
she hoped one day would be able to dance across her body in delight.

"How much longer, Tam?" she could feel his growing frustration at his=20
forced inactivity and his hatred of having to be dependent on Tamara=20
and Chakotay.

"From looking at your hands, baby, I'm thinking one or two more=20
healings and these bandages can come off for good." She mused giving=20
the long pale hands a thorough exam with a tricorder and her healing=20
sense. "Why don't you go for a run on the holodeck, Tom? Work off=20
some of your excess energy."

No answer from Tom.=20

Preparing new bandages she fitted them to his hands and watched his=20
face and the play of emotions playing havoc there and inside him.

"I hate this," he complained bitterly causing her to flinch back from=20
him.

"I feel it too, Tom," she responded quietly as she finished the=20
bandages.

"I think I will take that run on the holodeck," he said contritely=20
and left without so much as a thank you.=20

Tamara sighed; things were starting to build up between the three of=20
them, especially with Tom holding in so much resentment that he=20
needed help. It was odd, the young man wanted to be wanted, just not=20
helped. This of course placed pressure on her to hurry up the=20
healing, but she was going as fast as she could, and Chakotay just=20
seemed=85distant to it all. //he's just trying to maintain an even=20
keel, // she said to herself, and then forced her mind to focus back=20
on work.=20

**********

A week later, Tamara finished the last healing on Tom's hands and=20
replaced the bandages with soft thermal gloves to keep them warm.=20
Plus it was a gentle reminder to him and everyone else he still had=20
some limitations on mobility, but he was closer than ever to being=20
better.

At home he was at ease with the children and played with them for=20
hours on end. The kids were mindful of his hands taking care not to=20
hurt Daddy Tom as they were now calling him. They recently roped him=20
into bedtime stories by holding the books and turning the pages for=20
him. This of course led to arguments over whose turn it was to hold=20
the book or page to turn which led to wrestling matches and yells for=20
Mom to intervene, but she let Tom handle it.

By the end of the third week, it was like Tom had always been there=20
as part of the household; which in some way, he had been.

Now was the time for the extensive physical therapy for Tom and he=20
pushed himself very hard on this, for he wanted to get back to the=20
helm as fast as he could.  Disappointment filled him when he didn't=20
make as much progress as he felt he should have at this point. His=20
anger grew as the days went on and Tamara tried all that she could to=20
distract him, but even that failed; plus it didn't help that Chakotay=20
was taking such a back seat to the whole matter. It was like the man=20
had suddenly forgotten he had a family unless reminded, and with=20
Tom's poor attitude, no one was being reminded of much of anything=20
lately.=20

Then Tom's temper finally blew and he was so disrespectful to Tamara=20
that he had her in tears as he followed her back to their quarters=20
arguing the whole way. His cocky abusive attitude not only made her=20
cry, but by the time they got back, she was mad and she decided to do=20
something about, and since he was acting like a spoiled little brat=85=20
She suddenly grabbed him and pulled him over her knee.

"What the=85" he gasped as his pants were shoved down.=20

SMACK!
He couldn't believe this was happening to him. A red handprint=20
appeared on his bare firm white ass while his sweat pants were down=20
around his ankles.

"OW!" Tom squealed as a matching blow landed on the other cheek.

SMACK!

"That hurts!" he yelled indignant at the action his face was bright=20
red in embarrassment as he squirmed to get up.

"It's supposed to hurt," Tamara replied slapping his ass again. "If=20
you leave my lap, I'll let Chakotay do this and we both know he's a=20
lot stronger than I am, Thomas. Because one way or another you're=20
going to learn not to treat people so poorly or act like a spoiled=20
rotten brat! And if you are going to act like a child, you will be=20
punished like one!"

"Yes, ma'am," he promised himself that he would stay on her lap no=20
matter what or how much it hurt and it was already hurting plenty,=20
for if Chakotay got a hold of him and found out what... Shame filled=20
him as he realized how much he deserved this.

"You need to learn to watch your mouth, Thomas," Tamara smacked him=20
again not realizing she was addressing him with his formal name. "And=20
some self-discipline. I realize you're frustrated by all this, but=20
with some patience this will be over with soon."

Tamara spanked him for quite awhile till his ass began to color up=20
like a bowl of tomato soup. Tears were running down his face when she=20
stopped and let him lie on her lap while stroking his lower back for=20
comfort and letting him regain his composure.

Sniffing, he got to his knees beside her on the floor his face=20
repentant. 	"I'm sorry, Tam," he apologized as he rubbed his sore=20
butt. "It's just so frustrating to be so helpless and have you and=20
Chakotay taking care of all my physical needs."

"Its okay, Tom. You are forgiven. Now let's get you cleaned up and=20
we'll have pizza for dinner, all right?" Tamara kissed him and helped=20
him up. She refastened his sweat pants around his waist grinning when=20
he flinched in pain.

"All right," he brightened up and followed her into the bathroom=20
where she wiped the dried tears from his face and kissed him=20
senseless.

Chakotay noticed Tom's squirming on the couch that evening but didn't=20
say anything when Tamara caught his eye and shook her head no.=20
Picking up another report and putting his feet up on the coffee=20
table, he was not surprised when a tense Tom curled up beside him=20
with his head in his lap. Absently, he rubbed Tom's neck and shoulder=20
feeling the younger man relax under his fingers. It had been a long=20
time since the young man had been so close and it felt good to stroke=20
his soft hair. He then let his hand roam down the pale flesh with a=20
soft exploratory nature.=20

Looking up from her desk, Tamara found Chakotay staring at her with=20
amusement on his face. His hand was on Tom's ass and he could feel=20
the heart rising from the warm flesh while Tom was blushing and=20
hiding his face in the big man's lap.

"What caused this?" Chakotay questioned Tamara, with a mixture of=20
amusement and protectiveness.

"I think Tom should explain it to you," she replied turning back to=20
her work smiling at the discomfort and embarrassment Tom was feeling,=20
knowing it would be a long time before he ever acted that way again=85
toward her.

"Tom, would you care to tell me about this?" he gently squeezed the=20
hot flesh while Tom flinched and squealed from the pain.

"I was very disrespectful and smarted off to Tamara during therapy=20
today," he admitted keeping his eyes closed in shame.

"I see," he continued rubbing the warm flesh making Tom squirm and=20
his cock got hard. "Stand up, Tom."

Getting to his feet, Tom watched curiously as Chakotay put the report=20
down on the table and stood up facing him. He could see and feel the=20
lust rolling off of the stocky man and he shivered in spite of=20
himself he was feeling pretty horny too, for it had been far too long=20
since they touched.

Without warning, Chakotay picked Tom up and put the blonde over his=20
shoulder while Tamara looked on in amusement.

"Coming, babe?" he asked leering at her to come and join the fun.

"Later, you two have fun." She laughed at Tom's look of surprise on=20
his face as he was hauled off to the bedroom where Chakotay would=20
fuck him through the mattress. //Finally,// she said to herself, glad=20
to sense that Chakotay was making a connection to them again. //The=20
man is way too overworked=85and so am I, // she thought, having no=20
choice but to keep working, but wanting to be in the bedroom.=20

They were both deeply asleep when she joined them near midnight and=20
crawled in bed. As she started to sleep she felt something=85another=20
presence, and sat up to concentrate=85but it was gone. She looked=20
around, and shook it off, //girl you got to get more rest. //=20

*************

Tom was cleared for full duty and resumed his place as Chief Pilot on=20
Alpha Shift with Chakotay spending his first few days back happy and=20
content with the world at hand.

When he didn't get to spend as much time with Tamara and Chakotay=20
anymore he felt his own doubts and insecurities begin to rise again=20
and on impulse he informed Chakotay that he wished to move back to=20
his own quarters and have time for himself. He just didn't want to=20
confess to the fact that he was scared to death and was feeling=20
overwhelmed by it all.

Tamara was so busy in Sickbay lately working on her new project that=20
she hadn't noticed Tom's tension even with their bond until Chakotay=20
broke the news to her. She had forgotten that he needed constant=20
reassurance of their love for him. It also didn't help that Chakotay=20
was busy with his work, taking on extra shifts, even in engineering=20
to help keep Voyager going; it was apparent that Chakotay forgot too.

"I don't want Tom to leave, Chakotay. He's part of the family=85he's=85oh=20
hell, I love him and so do you," Tamara yelled when he told her that=20
Tom wanted to move back to his own quarters. "He makes us complete."

"But it's his decision," Chakotay stated, and then tried to hold her,=20
but she stepped away from him, and he gave a frustrated sigh.

They didn't hear the door open to their quarters or realize that the=20
subject of their discussion was just outside the bedroom door.

"Did we do something wrong?" The raw pain in her voice cut through=20
him. "I thought he was happy here. The children absolutely adore=20
their daddy Tom."

"Take it easy. Don't get worked up," Chakotay could feel the hysteria=20
welling up inside of her. In the hall, Tom could feel it too.

Tom had not realized till now how much being part of the family meant=20
to him. Outside of his smartass attitude, they accepted him without=20
hesitation and loved him. He was leaving because he didn't feel=20
worthy of Chakotay and Tamara's love and that he was the cause of why=20
things were so distant between them all.

"I'll fucking get worked up if I want too, Chakotay," she spat at him=20
furious than she sagged on the bed her energy gone. Tears fell down=20
her face and he sat next to her and placed an arm around her=20
shoulder.=20=20

"You said he would stay."

"I said I hoped he would stay, but the final decision was his. Don't=20
put words in my mouth," he snapped, his anger was beginning to show=20
as he removed his arm and stood up.

"If I was going to put words in your mouth, I'd put them there!" she=20
snapped back.

"Like the way you fucked with my mind so I'd fuck Tom in sickbay!"=20

The words were out before anyone knew what was said, and a deaf=20
silence hung in the air as Chakotay realized what he said, and why.=20
His frustration turned too blood curdling, chilling anger. "You=85you=85"=20
he couldn't speak; the realization was too much for him at the=20
moment.=20

Tom heard the fury, and he himself couldn't believe what he had=20
heard, but the overwhelming guilt flowing from Tamara only supported=20
the accusation in being true. He pressed his back to the wall,=20
needing something to hold himself up with, for the knowledge that=20
Chakotay had come to him that night, that it wasn't a dream, and that=20
he was=85made to do it=85was overwhelming him. Then on an impulse of=20
energy he ran from the quarters as fast as his feet could carry him.=20

"You have to understand, I was desperate, Tom was dying=85I=85"

"Shut up," he growled, and didn't even flinch when she gasped at him,=20
for he never talked to her like that before. He looked like he was=20
going to say more, and then stopped, raising his hands in disgust and=20
stormed out.=20

Tamara fell to the floor weeping, for what she feared most just=20
occurred, the truth was out. Then when she thought about Tom, she=20
could sense it=85he had been here, he heard the whole thing. The grief=20
and guilt overwhelmed her, for it was her fault that her family, what=20
she loved most was now destroyed.=20
=09=20
************

Tom ran to the nearest observation lounge and locked himself in, for=20
he needed privacy, since he didn't have his own quarters anymore. He=20
fell to his knees, pain of realization, hurt, and anger, all of it=20
overwhelming him. He wanted to simply get away from it, run=85fly=85get=20
away as fast and as far as he could, not caring about consequences or=20
anything else. But there was no place to go, and so he curled up into=20
a tight ball and cried himself into and exhausted sleep.=20

Tom suddenly found himself in a wooded glen broken with rays of=20
sunshine streaming through the leaves and branches. Strolling to the=20
center of the glen, he found a silver furred wolf, a red sorrel=20
stallion and a golden falcon, sitting near each other waiting=85waiting=20
for him. There was a feeling of peace, love and contentment=20
surrounding him as he wondered what was going on, for he never had a=20
dream like this before, and he was sure these types of animals didn't=20
make it a normal practice of sitting around together.

"You seem confused, young one," the wolf spoke to Tom.

"What is this place?" Tom wondered as he stared at the animals and=20
they returned the look.

"This is a place of spirits. We are the triad on this level as you=20
are part of one on the other," the falcon answered.

"So this is the place where Chakotay and Tamara come too on their=20
vision quests," he sat down cross-legged in the grass before them,=20
totally amazed at being here.

"Why are you running away from your life mates," the red stallion=20
asked while he nuzzled Tom's cheek.

"Why am I here?" he rubbed the stallion's neck, not wanting to answer=20
that question, so asked one of his own.

"I wanted to meet you at least once before you leave, my friend," the=20
falcon looked him in the eye. "I would have been a guide, friend or=20
whatever you needed, but without help you will not be able to return.=20
Though if you do seek help and still leave the circle will be broken=20
and all will go their separate ways as will we."

Suddenly the peace, love and contentment vanished leaving negative=20
feelings of sorrow, hopelessness, anger and shame.

"Is this the circle that Tamara refers too once in awhile?" Tom asked=20
with growing dread.

"We make up the inner circle while you, Chakotay and Tamara make up=20
the outer circle, all working in unison," the wolf answered.

"Meaning if I leave Tay and Tam, everything will fall apart and they=20
will break up?" Tom questioned, astonished at how vital he was to=20
this union.

"The child gains wisdom," the stallion snorted shaking his neck=20
causing his mane to go every which way and covering his eyes with=20
long strands of hair.

"Sometimes, we find it necessary to stick our noses in the outer=20
plane's business." the falcon interjected. "We brought you=20
intentionally so you could learn what could happen if you leave, Tom,=20
for they not only need you now, they will need you even more in the=20
times to come."
"What do you mean?" Tom asked with great concern. "And what about=20
what she did? Forcing me and Chakotay=85"

"No one `forced' you to do anything but admit how you feel," the=20
Falcon replied.=20

"Tamara is guilty of entering the sacred places of your minds and=20
bringing forth what she found there and placing things into motion,=20
nothing more. She didn't make you want to be with Chakotay, your own=20
heart did that," the Horse explained.=20

"And no one made Chakotay love you that was his own heart. Plus,=20
where would you be now if she didn't connect you and Chakotay?" the=20
Wolf asked.=20

Tom thought about it. He had to admit, if he didn't experience=20
Chakotay's love that night, he probably would have found a way to end=20
his life, and he would have missed out on loving the man of his=20
dreams, and a very good woman. Then with a sigh, "I'd have been truly=20
lost," he finally admitted.=20

"I'm proud of you child," the Falcon praised. "Now if that seed of=20
wisdom can be sowed into others, than all will not be lost either."=20

"As with all things, the choice is yours to make. No one will stand=20
in your way, child," stated the wolf. "It is always a free choice as=20
to which path you want to take=85together or alone."

All three faded out and the wooded glen spun away and Tom sat up his=20
heart racing while gasping for air while sweat poured off his body,=20
he was still in the observation lounge. He stood up and realized he=20
had spent most of the night here and headed back. He realized how=20
much he loved his `family' and how stupid he was being, and that if=20
they needed him, he was going to be there for them=85no matter what. He=20
started to run back home and dashed through the doors and found=20
Tamara sitting on the sofa, alone, wrapped in a blanket, staring off=20
in the distance.=20

Bursting into tears, Tom moved to his bond mate and hugged her=20
fiercely. She hugged him back holding his head to her chest and=20
rocking the distraught pilot while he sobbed uncontrollably for=20
awhile. His crying gradually softened to some sniffles.

"I don't want to leave," Tom whispered peering up at her with tear=20
stained lashes. He sounded like a lost little boy. "I want us to be a=20
family and I don't care how it started; only that it lasts!"=20

"Oh, Tom," Tamara cried, feeling that she was forgiven by him, and=20
the relief filled her aching heart. "I'm sorry, I never meant to hurt=20
or break trust, but=85you were leaving us, and I knew=85I knew how much=20
you loved Chakotay, and how much he loved you. That you would do=20
nothing to hurt him and would fight for him if=85if you knew. I was=20
wrong about how I did what I did, I should of spoke with Chakotay,=20
but I also knew that both your sense of honor would step in=85I=85you=20
needed," she sighed, and cried some more, holding the young man she=20
loved very much.=20

"Like I said, I don't care how it happened, but your right. I see=20
that now, and if you tell me now, that that was the only time=85"=20

"It was=85I swear. I love and respect both of you so very much, but I=20
couldn't lose you, Tom, and I know Chakotay couldn't either."  She=20
confessed truthfully on his part and neither realized that she had=20
been in Chakotay's mind on several occasions while they were on=20
Rashela.

Tom hugged her tightly, and let his love flow to her and accepted=20
hers, and could feel some of her guilt and grief lesson, but was far=20
from gone. There was still a part of their family missing=85Chakotay,=20
and Tom was concerned he couldn't feel him. "Did you block him out?"

Tamara looked into bright blue eyes, her own filled with=20
remorse, "No, he's blocked `me' out. Between his meditations and his=20
lessons with Tuvok, he can do that now," she sniffed, while wiping=20
her wet face.  "I tried to talk to him, but=85"

"He shut you out," Tom finished for her, for he understood the=20
Commander very well, and this was like him when things overwhelmed=20
him emotionally. "The man can face down the Borg Queen and never=20
break a sweat, but he can't face his own emotions without a time=20
out," Tom stated, feeling a hundred percent better. He knew in his=20
heart the three of them were destined to be together, but that didn't=20
mean things would be easy, only that they would face it all together.=20

"A time out can be a good thing=85I hope," Tamara replied, fear in her=20
eyes of what results Chakotay may come up with.=20

"Let me talk to him, okay?" He saw her nod yes, "I=85I know things are=20
going to work out=85some how," he stated, and leaned in and gave her a=20
kiss on the cheek before heading out. He knew where Chakotay was=20
without even checking, there was only one place=85his office.=20

************

Chakotay was in his office standing by the view port, leaning his=20
head against the thick clear material that was used, his arms wrapped=20
tightly around his chest.=20

When the chime sounded, he gave a heavy sigh, "Enter," he replied and=20
stood up straight. He turned to see Tom Paris enter, and didn't=20
bother changing his body language. "What can I do for you Tom?" he=20
asked, though his eyes were not warm, his tone was gentle.=20
"I think it's more of what I can do for you, Cha," Tom replied softly=20
as he walked up to stand next to the First Officer, a bit surprised=20
that Chakotay wasn't as upset as he anticipated. "First, I should let=20
you know I was there=85when the `shit' hit the fan; in the next room as=20
a matter of fact and heard the whole thing. I too was upset and angry=20
about what Tamara did=85but I've had a lot of time to think=85"

"Your telling me, that you're not angry that she violated your mind,=20
and manipulated us into making love in the sickbay, and then making=20
sure we didn't remember it?" he asked in disbelief.=20

"I didn't say that only that I had time to think about it. But I am=20
saying that I love Tamara and I `love' you, and I want us to be=20
together, and I don't care how it came about. Though I do understand=20
one thing, if she didn't do what she did, if you didn't come to me=20
and share `your' love with me=85I wouldn't be here."  Tom could see his=20
words made Chakotay think, as his dark eyes shifted away from him.=20

"Cha, I love you, and you were my reason for fighting to stay alive.=20
Can you really fault her in this? Sure how she went about it was=20
wrong, but would you have come to me that night if she had asked?"=20

Chakotay took a cleansing breath, "No, probably not," he admitted,=20
and then turned to face Tom. "And I meant what I said that night; I=20
couldn't bear to lose you too."=20

Tom moved in and wrapped his arms around the man that stirred his=20
soul like no other and hugged him. He was glad that Chakotay hugged=20
him back, but could feel the man was still distant, his barriers in=20
full swing. "Cha, love, what's wrong?" Tom asked with=20
concern. "Besides, this mess I made or what Tamara did? You've been=20
so=85distant lately?"

"It's just so=85confusing," Chakotay replied hugging Tom, resting his=20
head on his shoulder and became silent. He let his strong hands=20
caress up the lean back.=20

"Cha, are we going to be able to work this out?"=20

There was silence for a while, then, "Yes, Tommy, we'll work it out.=20
I rather like having you around," he said, his voice more light than=20
it had been in ages. "And your right, she did do wrong, but in this=20
case, the end totally justifies the means," he said, as he leaned=20
back and met moist blue eyes looking at him.=20

"Then let's let her know=85okay?"=20

"Okay," Chakotay replied warmly, and took Tom's hand and followed him=20
back so the three of them could talk things out.=20

************

"NO MORE OF THIS!" Tamara declared rather loudly. "We will be married=20
before the end of the week and that will settle that. All three of=20
us."=20

"Marry you?" Tom asked in disbelief. They had settled that what=20
occurred in the past had been wrong, but the result could not be=20
denied, and so she had been forgiven. But then Tamara stated that she=20
couldn't take another major upset should Tom get insecure again, and=20
suddenly burst out with a solution.=20

"Yes, to both of us," Tamara stated firmly and would not broker a no=20
from either man.

Neither man could refuse her when she put her foot down, especially=20
when it really was the answer to everything.

The small simple wedding would be this Saturday and this would put=20
Tom's fears at rest for good. No more guessing games for marriage=20
vows meant he was committed to staying in the relationship with the=20
both of them. He would have no excuses for running away plus it made=20
him an instant father and he adored the kids just as much as if they=20
were his own.

The marriage would be the first triad on Voyager, but a couple of=20
others were already in the works, but like usual, the senior staff=20
would lead the way.=20

"It would be good for the children." Chakotay stated, for in his=20
culture, the children were raised not just by the family but the=20
whole tribe, and this was fast becoming a large tribe.

Her other demand was that Chakotay should spend more time with the=20
family. Lately he had fallen onto his old ways of working late and=20
getting up early to do more work, and this was no longer acceptable=20
by her or Tom.=20

"Reports to be taken care of? That's an easy one," she had told him=20
while looking at Tom. "We'll cut back on his Sickbay shifts. I am a=20
fully qualified Doctor now and I am currently training three other=20
people in Sickbay now. Have Tom spend a couple of half shifts weekly=20
learning and doing reports since he is fourth in line for the command=20
structure."=20

Chakotay gave a small protest, but caved in, for peace was the=20
essential key, as was keeping the `family' happy.=20

There was a small wedding in the mess hall that Saturday night and a=20
wonderful three day honeymoon in the West Virginia program that=20
Tamara had made with Tom's help, and Chakotay's input. It was one of=20
the first things the three had done together, long before they made=20
love, and the symbolism wasn't lost on any of them.=20

************
End of Part Thirteen
************


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************
Part Fourteen-Conclusion
************
See Part One for disclaimer

It was Tamara's birthday next week and the boys were trying to figure=20
out what to get her for a present. Chakotay was frowning while=20
thinking about a present when Tom leaned over on impulse and kissed=20
him while wrapping his arms around Chakotay's chest snuggling, for=20
they were sharing the sofa. That was one of the things Chakotay loved=20
about the blond helmsman was his ability to snuggle, as Tom loved to=20
be held and petted. Reaching up to caress the red-gold hair with one=20
hand while placing the other hand in the small of Tom's back, he=20
pulled them closer together hip to hip and chest to chest in response=20
to the kiss, glad the kids were not home and not due for a couple of=20
hours.

"I thought we were supposed to be working on Tam's present?" Tom=20
asked when they came up for air.

"Later," Chakotay growled as he undressed Tom and himself at the same=20
time. Taking the younger man by the arm, he led him into the bedroom.

"But, Cha=85" Tom protested weakly and gave up when he felt the hot wet=20
mouth engulfing his hard cock. The sensations were overwhelming him.=20
It was so good to have Cha back to his normal self, and it showed in=20
the loving he gave both his spouses.=20

Tamara smiled as she worked with the Doctor on her genetic=20
experiments in Sickbay. The activities in her bedroom echoed through=20
her mind as the boys enjoyed themselves with their loving, for things=20
had smoothed out between them all, taking some adjustment, and=20
Chakotay a lot of meditations, but they were together much like their=20
first night and stayed that way.=20

Humming in her work efforts, the Doctor and the Healer celebrated=20
that evening when the experiment proved very successful and made a=20
toast to future result of the next stage.
Then heading for home, Tamara could hardly keep from yawning and her=20
eyes open as she entered their quarters. She was surprised to find it=20
quiet and everything cleaned and so tidy. There was a PADD propped up=20
on the dining table, along with a rose, as she went to the replicator=20
and ordered her favorite hot toddy. The message was from Chakotay:

Hey Tam,
Tom and I took the kids to the holodeck. Join us if you feel up to=20
it. Miss you.
Tay

Placing the PADD on the coffee table, she sat on the couch to enjoy=20
her drink believing that she would finish and than she would go to=20
the holodeck. Leaning her head back against the couch and putting her=20
feet up on the table, she watched the stars go by and closed her eyes=20
for just a moment=85

It was not surprising to Chakotay to find Tamara asleep on the couch=20
when he came home. Tom had taken the kids to the mess hall for dinner=20
while he came home to check on their wife. She looked drawn and=20
fatigued from weeks of working the night shift in Sickbay and at the=20
helm. In other words, she was overdoing it again and it was time for=20
her husbands to step in. Taking the coffee mug out of her hand and=20
placing it on the table, he sat down next to her.

Feeling his big warm presence, she snuggled against his chest and=20
felt his arms wrap around her. He kissed the top of her head and=20
started to nuzzle her ear while inhaling her scent.

"Tay, take me to bed, please." She whispered. "I want you to love me."

"Anything you want, baby." Chakotay started to pick her up but=20
stopped. "I think I'm getting to old for this," he teased to cover=20
for his reluctance to carry her. He was rewarded with a light slap,=20
as Tamara got up and took his hand and they disappeared into the=20
bedroom shutting the door behind them.

Within moments, he had them both undressed and she lay in the center=20
of their huge king-size bed. Tamara's green eyes were heavy with=20
desire as she teased him by touching herself. All the blood in his=20
head headed south and she growled watching him grow hard. Bringing=20
her hand up to her mouth, she tasted herself and his desire grew.

Kneeling beside her, he ran his fingers through her long red hair=20
loving the silken softness and inhaled the strawberry scent. He=20
fought to control his raging lust running through as he drank in her=20
beauty by starlight. It had been weeks since the last time they made=20
love because of the hectic area of space Voyager was currently in.

The warmth of her creamy body was intoxicating as he slid lengthwise=20
down her body cupping her breasts with his large brown hands. Pulling=20
himself from her sensual lips, he nipped and sucked her large rosy=20
nipples. Watching him, her hands caressed his soft black hair and=20
tracing the tattoo on his forehead. Whimpering softly, her back=20
arched up against him wanting more.

Moving down, he left a trail of hot kisses down her stomach as he=20
placed his hands under her thighs holding her hips in his grip as his=20
mouth touched her absolute center. She came at his first touch and=20
arched upwards against his face.

"Oh, Spirits, Chakotay." She clutched the bed sheets and didn't=20
notice the rips in them from her fingernails.=20

His tongue found her nub and soon sent her on a second orgasm as he=20
pushed two fingers into her folds. The juices were flowing and he=20
lapped them up fast and fierce.

"I want you now, Tay, please," she begged.

Chakotay came up, gathered her in his arms kissed her hard and pushed=20
his erection home within her vagina. Groaning with her pleasure, her=20
nails left a bloody trail down his smooth back. His movement let the=20
friction build up for her third and fourth orgasm and he followed=20
shortly after with a yell coating her insides with his fluids.

Drifting off, Tamara was barely aware of Chakotay cleaning her up=20
with a warm cloth and holding her as she slept, her hand caressing=20
his stomach. //mental note to self, inform Tay lovingly that he's=20
getting pudgy in the middle, // was her final thought.

"Go to sleep, baby," she heard as she woke for a moment feeling Tom=20
crawling in with them and she was surrounded on both sides by warmth=20
and felt their love through the bond they shared, even if Chakotay=20
kept a bit of distance in the link, but she couldn't blame him and=20
never pushed it.

When the guys got up in the morning, she was still in a deep sleep.

"Chakotay to the Doctor," Chakotay said as he pulled on a fresh=20
uniform stopping to grope Tom's ass when it came within his reach.

"Sickbay here. What can I do for you, Commander?" The EMH responded.

"Tamara seems to be exhausted and we'd like her to take some time off=20
to rest and relax, Doctor. I wanted your opinion on the matter." He=20
said fastening his jacket top while leering at Tom rubbing his ass.

"I concur with you, Commander. I think Tamara taking a few days off=20
would be good for her."

"Thanks, Doc. Chakotay out." He pulled Tom into his arms and kissed=20
him soundly. "What are your plans for this morning?" he asked when=20
they came up for air.

"Besides getting the kids ready for school, I was going to spend some=20
time with Tam," Tom said while nibbling on the First Officer's neck=20
and squeezing that firm round butt. "Why?"

"You want to tell her about being off for a few days or you want me=20
to do it?" Chakotay kissed him sucking up his tongue.

"I'll tell her. You'd better get going if you want any breakfast,=20
Cha," Tom looked dreamy eyed at his husband.

"All right, and at lunch I'll tell you of the great idea I have," he=20
teased then Chakotay reluctantly pulled himself away and walked=20
swiftly out the door.

Returning to the master bedroom, Tom found the kids sleeping with Mom=20
in the huge king bed. Smiling at the sight, he grabbed the holocamera=20
off the dresser and snapped a photo of them. Replacing it on the=20
dresser, he decided the hell with it and crawled in with them. The=20
Paris family had never done things like piling together into bed=20
while the Chakotay-Paris family did all the time. Here he knew he was=20
loved and cherished and he found Tamara watching him with love in her=20
eyes.

His wife was a survivor like himself with many similar facets in=20
their pasts. Rape, abuse, prison, some major mistakes, but still=20
hopeful for love and someone to trust and accept them. They had found=20
each other in the middle with Chakotay who grounded them with his=20
quiet, calm and sometimes stoic presence and generous heart. He=20
slipped into a light doze surrounded by his family who provided the=20
love, warmth and security he had always desired and they never asked=20
for anything in return.

"Bright-eyes," he heard in his left ear as a set of teeth gently=20
nipped that sensitive area just below his left ear. The sensation=20
went straight to his cock and he arched up with a soft whimper=20
seeking more contact. "Look at me."

Opening his blue eyes, he found Tamara resting on his chest and=20
draped over the rest of his naked body enjoying the feel of bare skin=20
to bare skin.

"The kids are dressed and gone to school and the nursery. Now, you=20
have my undivided attention," Tamara admitted as she started to kiss=20
him while letting her hands work magic on his pale sensitive skin.

"Please," he squirmed under her when her lips began to work their way=20
down to his chest. He raised his hands to touch her, but she quickly=20
pinned them to his sides.

"No touching, bright eyes," Tamara growled. She loved to drive him to=20
the breaking point touching and tasting his sensitive skin. Her teeth=20
gently chewed on his left nipple while toying with his right=20
squeezing it with her hand.

"Oh, Tam," he gasped as his body arched up trying to get her=20
attention to his hard cock.

Sliding down his body, her mouth caught his cock and engulfed it=20
deeply into her throat.

"Oh, gods, baby!" Tom lost all will to think and just felt the=20
pleasure of her hot wet mouth on his cock. A few sucking motions=20
later; he shot his cum into the back of her throat yelling out as he=20
did.

She finished her fun and curled up behind him while he slowly=20
regained his senses.

"Wow. I don't think Cha will know what hit him once you do that to=20
him," Tom remarked turning over so they were face to face.

"I knew I just needed some practice deep-throating. It's hard enough=20
to throw our husband off balance," she started to nuzzle his=20
neck. "But a challenge worth trying for."

"So you still think you can do it on your birthday?" he tilted his=20
head back exposing more of his throat to her mouth.

"I'm certainly going to try," she bit him gently at the base of his=20
neck. "Your turn."

"It is, isn't it?"

************=09
"It is 0600 am" the computer alarm spoke to the trio asleep on the=20
huge bed. Tamara got up from between her husbands and jumped into a=20
hot water shower. Ignoring the alarm, the men snuggled and went back=20
to sleep despite the noise of their wife.

"Computer, shut off alarm," a sleepy Tom grumbled from beneath his=20
pillow.
Stepping out of the bathroom dripping wet, she smiled wickedly as she=20
pulled the blankets off the men and crawled in between them dripping=20
cold water everywhere. Startled yells assaulted her eardrums as both=20
men jumped out of the bed in shock and chills. She was the picture of=20
innocence as they glared at her.

"What was that for?" Chakotay snarled in mock anger and lunged for=20
her.

"It's my birthday," She squealed and dove for the other side of the=20
bed when Tom scooped her up and held her for Chakotay as he bowled=20
both of them over and all three sprawled gracelessly on the bed in a=20
tangle of limbs and bodies. Both men grabbed their wife tickling her=20
with no mercy until the tears were rolling down her face and she was=20
begging for them to stop.

Her cold wet hair let her turn the tide on them as she started=20
rubbing it against their nice warm bodies and they started backing=20
away from her. Pushing Tom back down on the bed, she kissed him and=20
started playing with his nipples while grinding her hips against his=20
cock grinning when he started to moan in arousal.=20

Chakotay took advantage of the opportunity and slipped into the=20
shower while they weren't looking. Once inside, he could still hear=20
the sounds of their love making and he smiled and set the shower for=20
water too. He leaned back into the flowing water, relaxing, soaping=20
up, and got lost in the relaxing sensation, not realizing that he=20
continued to rub his abdomen, like a mother would when one had an=20
upset stomach. Then he snapped open his eyes and stopped and finished=20
his shower. He stepped from the shower and took an antacid, for his=20
stomach had been upset for a little while, and this mornings `shock'=20
treatment didn't help.=20

He exited to see that his spouses had finished their romp, and dashed=20
to gather his uniform before either one of them decided to pull him=20
in. He saw the mischievous looks Tom and Tamara gave him, and knew=20
something was up, but not what. He did know that Tamara was up for a=20
little surprise too.=20

************
Chakotay and Tamara were on their way to the mess hall for breakfast=20
when she pulled him into the observation lounge. "I need to talk to=20
you=85right now."

There was no one else in the lounge and she got him to call for=20
privacy lock and sound suppression. He gave her a puzzled look as he=20
did it and wondered what was going on. "Computer, engage privacy lock=20
and sound suppression authorization Chakotay alpha two three."=20

"Engaged," the computer sounded as she backed him up against the=20
bulkhead body to body.

"What is this all about, Tam?" This was not like her at all until he=20
felt her arousal through their link and the gleam in her eye as she=20
reached for his trouser fastenings and began to undo them while=20
locking their lips together in a searing kiss.

"It's my birthday and I want to show you something," she purred=20
drawing his hardening cock and balls out of their confinement as she=20
knelt in front of him. "And keep your hands to yourself please."

Gently she sucked on his balls and rolled them in her mouth causing=20
him to groan and found his eyes fastened on her as she nibbled her=20
way up his shaft as it hardened to its fullest length. Taking the=20
weeping head in her mouth, she played with it for a moment while=20
using her hands to pin his hips against the wall so she control the=20
movements. Another groan broke from him as she gazed upwards and=20
found dark eyes watching her with fierce passion and his hands were=20
trying to grip the wall with no luck.

Relaxing her throat muscles, she deep throated her husband's cock,=20
something she had wanted to do for a long time and with Tom's recent=20
help she could do now, for the man was a natural, or so Chakotay=20
thought when he first experienced it. Her nose was buried in his=20
pubic hair and slowly she withdrew establishing a rhythm as he fought=20
to keep his hands off of her like she had asked. His hands curled=20
into fists and he pounded the wall in frustration at not being able=20
to touch her and take control. It was maddening=85wonderfully maddening.

After a couple of moments of slow torturous sucking on his hard cock,=20
she turned the rhythm fast and furious because of the time=20
constraints. He shouted to the heavens as he came deep in her throat=20
and for the first time she was able to swallow all of his cum and not=20
lose a drop. Licking him clean, his knees gave out and they sank to=20
the carpet while his eyes rolled to the back of his head. There was a=20
look of surprise and sheer happiness on his face to her delight while=20
she licked her lips in satisfaction. Finishing with cleaning his=20
cock, she gently placed everything back where it belonged. Though she=20
did get a tad concern when he turned pale on her for a moment, but=20
after another minute, his color returned.=20

Chakotay was speechless. Spirits above, he loved it when Tamara could=20
surprise him and that she did by just giving him the best blowjob=20
he'd ever had. He knew how difficult it had been for her to take his=20
large cock deep into her throat and she had tried numerous times and=20
had been unable to overcome her reflex gags. He gazed at her with=20
adoration at her gift to him.

"Tay?" she asked. "Are you all right?"


"Fucking fabulous, babe," he whispered still in awe over her=20
performance. "Help me up." He put his hand out and she pulled him to=20
his feet. Holding him in her arms, she could feel him trembling just=20
a little from the mind-blowing experience.

"You're welcome. Ready for some breakfast, handsome? It's early in=20
the day and you need your strength," she teased as he let her lead=20
him to the mess hall his eyes never leaving her.

Captain Janeway was sitting with Tuvok having breakfast and she tried=20
to catch her First Officer's attention with no luck since his full=20
attention was entirely on his wife and by the look of the smile on=20
his face it was going to stay there.

"Does the Commander seem a little pre-occupied this morning, Tuvok?"=20
she asked taking a sip of her coffee making a face at the awful taste=20
of it.

"He does seem distracted, Captain," Tuvok noted that the First=20
Officer had only eyes for his wife gazing at her with pure adoration=20
while following her to an empty table where the couple sat to eat=20
breakfast.

"Today is Tamara's birthday and something is going on," Captain=20
Janeway's intuition was kicking in as she watched them focus solely=20
on each other while wondering where their significant other was.

"Is this something I should investigate, Captain?" Tuvok voiced his=20
concern. The safety of the ship was his first and foremost priority.

"No, it probably has something to do with birthday presents," she=20
replied eyeing her cold coffee and debating on getting her third cup=20
of the day.

"Aye, Captain," Tuvok decided to keep an eye on the couple anyway,=20
especially since the Commander still had a tendency to overwork and=20
had spread himself to cover almost all the departments when they were=20
short handed from time to time. He looked a bit pale, and his health=20
was a vital part of Voyager, regardless of who his wife was; plus it=20
was logical for him to keep tabs on all senior staff.

By the time they finished eating, Chakotay was somewhat recovered and=20
relaxed although he was still in awe of her gift. Dumping their trays=20
in the recycler, they headed for the turbo lift of a quick deep=20
throat kiss and the promise of lunch in Chakotay's office alone.

"Morning, Harry," Tamara grinned at the operations officer as they=20
stepped onto the bridge.

"Good morning, Tamara, Commander," Harry said noticing the First=20
Officer seemed distracted as he stepped over to his command chair and=20
sat down without replying.

Before Tamara could slip into her seat at the helm, Captain Janeway=20
appeared on the bridge and said sternly, "Healer, my ready room. Now."

"Yes, ma'am," Tamara answered cocking an eyebrow at her husband who=20
shrugged his shoulders indicating his `I don't know so don't ask'=20
while following the Captain into her office.

Tamara was a little wary of stepping into the ready room as the=20
majority of the time she was called in here because she was in=20
trouble until Kathryn motioned for her to sit on the couch instead=20
being seated in front of her desk.

"Something to drink, Tamara?" She asked hoping to put the Healer at=20
ease knowing that their friendship was still slightly strained and=20
one of her problems was trying to get the Healer to trust her again.

"No thanks, I'm fine," Tamara relaxed as Kathryn joined her on the=20
couch with a fresh cup of coffee. "What's on your mind, Kathryn?" she=20
sensed that this was personal and not ship's business from the amount=20
of amusement the Captain was projecting. It also helped that Andy=20
came to say hello, for she missed him and was glad that he missed her=20
too, but Kathryn was doing a great job taking care of him and vice a=20
verse as well.=20

"Curiosity. Why is my First Officer so distracted this morning?"

"I gave him a little surprise this morning that I had been working on=20
and it blew his mind literally, you might say," Tamara grinned=20
causing Kathryn to chuckle.

"How was the look on his face?" she intoned feeling that it was=20
something sexual.

"Absolutely fuckin' priceless. I'll remember that look for the=20
remaining length of my life." Tamara smiled at the memory.

"I want details." She took a swallow of coffee.

"I gave him the best blowjob of his life," Tamara deadpanned=20
seriously causing Kathryn to spray her coffee down the front of her=20
uniform and on poor Andy.

"What?" she snorted in disbelief.

"You heard me and that's all the details I'm giving up. He may be=20
distracted after lunch also." She inferred with a shit-eating grin on=20
her face.

"Why?" Kathryn was nothing if persistent.

"This stays between us. Promise? If Chakotay got wind of it, it would=20
ruin the bet I have with Tom," Tamara explained while bringing=20
Kathryn a towel from the replicator.

"Promise. Bet with Tom?" Now she was puzzled as she set the coffee=20
cup down and using the towel to wipe the dark liquid off of her=20
uniform and gently patted Andy, and scratched him lovingly behind the=20
ear.

"I bet Tom that I could get Chakotay three times before dinner."=20
Tamara sounded smug.

"You bet one husband that you could give the other husband three=20
blowjobs by dinnertime? Are you nuts?" The look on Kathryn's face was=20
incredulous and=20

Tamara had to laugh.

"Yep. It's hard to throw Chakotay a curve ball and so far it's=20
working. Don't you think?" she giggled.

"Are you going to be able to do it?"

"I believe so. One down, two to go. He promised to have lunch with me=20
in his office and for the third I though I would try the empty closet=20
in Sickbay or by having some kind of trouble on the Seymour." They=20
were both laughing about it now.

"Just don't kill my First Officer, please," Kathryn said not quite=20
trusting herself with her coffee yet. "Why do I get the feeling=20
there's more to all this then just blowjobs on the First Officer."

"Now that's a surprise for both of the boys. I'm not telling them=20
about that until tonight." She laid a hand on her belly and rubbed=20
the very slight mound there. "You're the first to know outside of the=20
Doctor, Kathryn."

"How far along are you?"

"Six weeks. I wanted to make sure they were all right and developing=20
normally before I told my husbands they we are having twins again,"=20
Tamara admitted.
Kathryn hugged her with delight, "Congratulations."

"Thanks, but I'd better get out to the helm. My adoring husband is=20
dying of curiosity out there of what we are doing in here." Tamara=20
returned the hug. "Promise to keep this to yourself."

"I promise. Now go drive Chakotay nuts. It will be good for him," she=20
said with a matching grin. "And Happy Birthday!"

"Thanks," Tamara smiled as she went to her duty station grinning=20
wickedly at Chakotay as she took her seat at the helm until it was=20
time for lunch. She ignored his attempts at questioning her about the=20
visit to the ready room saying she would tell him about it later.=20
Captain Janeway rescued her by showing up on the bridge and sitting=20
in her command chair causing her First Officer to remember that he=20
had work to do also.

Using her console she sent a quick message to Tom in their=20
quarters. `One down, two to go, baby.'

************
Chakotay pondered his wife's actions, it was not like her to be so=20
spontaneous, but he loved it. After a quiet morning at the helm, he=20
was defiantly surprised and feeling overwhelmed when he received=20
another excellent blowjob from his loving wife for his lunch meal.=20
His mind and cock were shattered with excitement when he regained his=20
composure a second time around. She sat there satisfied like `the cat=20
that got the canary' look on her face licking a spot of cum from the=20
corner of her lip.

They lay together on his couch for the rest of his lunch hour while=20
he rested wondering if she was planning on wearing him out. Not that=20
he would complain with her method.

"You are something else, my love." He admitted while nuzzling her=20
neck.
"I know." She agreed in vain, and set the alarm to sound in case they=20
fell asleep while they rested. It wouldn't do for Chakotay to be late=20
returning to the bridge.=20

************
Captain Janeway was smirking at him when he returned to the bridge=20
for the afternoon. Most of his mind was still on Tamara and how he=20
felt tired yet very much alive and sexually sated. He was running on=20
automatic as he sat down next to the Captain in the command section.

"Did you have a good lunch, Commander?" she asked in a whisper which=20
told him she knew what was going on.

"It was everything I could have hoped for," he answered her seriously=20
which caused her smile to widen even more.

Janeway snorted her amusement. "It's her birthday. I thought she=20
would be receiving, not giving."

He turned a deep shade of red and tried to concentrate on the reports=20
in front of him. No good, he was nearly useless today as his thoughts=20
wandered back to his sensuous mate. She was definitely up to=20
something and he was wondering if Tom was also behind this, but he=20
wasn't going to complain about it. Let them have their fun. "Oh, not=20
only has she been receiving, she's due for more," he stated,=20
referring to her present Tom and he had for her, but from Kathryn's=20
laugh, he knew she took it another way.

After several hours "Healer to Commander Chakotay," her voice on the=20
com system broke through his concentration halfway through the=20
afternoon near the end of his shift.

"Chakotay here." He responded eagerly upon hearing her voice. His=20
cock twitched as if in anticipation.

"Can you spare a few moments, I need your help on the Seymour?"=20
Tamara sounded puzzled and a little distracted.

"What are you doing on the Seymour, Tam?" He looked at the Captain.

"I was looking for some information when I ran across something you=20
might be=85interested in. So are you coming or not?"

"He'll be right there," Janeway said. "Go and take the rest of the=20
day off. It's her birthday after all."

"Thanks, Kathryn." He smiled at her and bounded off the bridge.

Janeway heard a giggle as she cut the com link and sat there letting=20
her imagination run away with her. She sensed Andy's amusement as he=20
curled by her feet, his `place' on the bridge; ever since he `moved'=20
in with her and knew he would listen to her with all his love at=20
whatever she had to say, but would always have room in his huge heart=20
for his first mistress Tamara.

************
Tamara intended to win the bet as she watched Chakotay enter the=20
little ship and his eyes widened when he found her sitting naked on=20
the bunk waiting for him.

"Are you playing the seductress today?" He was amazed to find himself=20
getting hard again for he figured his cock would be on strike the=20
rest of the day after lunch, he knew the rest of his body felt that=20
way. Of course it didn't hurt that she was sending over her arousal=20
through the link, and of course he didn't stop it either.=20

"I have an oral fixation today, Tay. Get naked so we can do each=20
other," she started to play with herself which made him hurry and=20
strip his own uniform off after locking the shuttle and engaging=20
soundproofing.

Happy to oblige, he was treated to his third orgasm that day and=20
curled up happily around his wife while they took a nap.

Tom sighed as he realized he lost the bet to his wife and he would be=20
covering her shifts in Sickbay for the next month. Then he grinned=20
when he felt how out of it Chakotay was, as she shared with him the=20
news and her proof, not that Tom would have doubted her word, she was=20
just showing off. Tamara had gotten him to come three times before=20
dinner in three different locations enjoying herself in the process.=20
The kids clamored for his attention while they put the finishing=20
touches on Mom's surprise party.

Mom was very surprised when the kids jumped out at her in their=20
quarters and she squealed in delight and made a big fuss over the=20
presents and the slightly tilted cake. She loved their presents of=20
the green shawl, macaroni necklace and colored pictures from school.=20
With a great deal of love, she put them to bed, told them a story and=20
tucked them in letting them know that Aunt Sam was watching them=20
while they went out for dinner and dancing.

She walked out of the children's bedroom area and stood stunned, for=20
in the right hand corner of their living room, the furniture was=20
gone, and a grand piano sat in its place. Behind the keyboard was=20
Tom, dressed to impress, playing. His smile and joy filled her as a=20
small tear rolled down her cheek, for she was touched. Then she saw=20
her older husband walking up to her, also dressed to impress and took=20
her hand, and swayed her into his arms and they started to slow=20
dance; then the tune changed, the piano more prominent, and Chakotay=20
began singing to her! It was his first time singing out of the shower=20
and he sang for her. All she could do was rest her head on his strong=20
shoulder and listen to his angelic voice, as Tom played as well as he=20
flew, and let the moment take her away=85she was very happy.=20

************
Tamara surprised both men by having a great big steak and baked=20
potato for her birthday dinner, still moved by her gift. "I grew up=20
in the mid west portion of the United States and it was considered=20
the meat and potato belt. Every once in a great while I get a=20
hankering for my favorite supper, so please indulge me for this one=20
night," she stated as an apology, for she like Tom had adapted to=20
becoming a vegetarian to please their older husband.  She dug in and=20
enjoyed it despite the taste of the steak being a little off flavored.

"I have something to tell both of you, Tay and Tom," Tamara announced=20
when the dinner plates were taken away. She had their undivided=20
attention. "Do you remember a few months ago, when we talked about=20
some more babies for the family?"

"Yes," Tom answered warily and Tay shook his head yes. "What about=20
it?"

"Well, we kept the sperm samples from both of you in stasis and I've=20
been doing some testing and mixing and=85" Both looked at her like she=20
was describing a cake recipe. "Yes, I'm pregnant." She told them and=20
sat back to watch the show on their faces.

It wasn't long in coming. Surprisingly, Chakotay fainted and Tom=20
swept her up in his arms ignoring his fallen husband on the floor.

"I love you, Tamara." Tom yelled as he gently put her down and=20
together they helped their husband to his feet.

"How far along are you, Tam?" Chakotay whispered in shock.

"Six weeks. Twins again, Tay. One boy and one girl. They are a=20
mixture of all three of us. It took a few months, but it finally=20
worked. I waited till now to make sure the embryos were developing=20
into healthy babies," Tamara explained as they made their way to=20
Sandrine's from their quarters, which still had half its living room=20
missing so a piano could sit there. Tamara wouldn't let them send it=20
way till they sang and played her to sleep tonight, knowing she would=20
deserve it.

Another surprise party in the Mess Hall followed dancing at=20
Sandrine's by the crew for the Healer. They took the news of the=20
babies very well.

//Life on Voyager could be pretty good. Now if we could just get home=20
sometime, // Tamara thought as one of her husbands claimed her for a=20
dance.

************
It was two days later and they just reached the very edge of what=20
soon would be the Pakor's territory. The senior staff met for their=20
morning briefing to discuss their arrival, for news had spread=20
through the ship and everyone was thrilled, for it meant a=20
possibility of cutting years off their travel home.=20

"In less than two weeks we'll be in the Pakor's territory, and they=20
have already made contact with us, and are looking forward to our=20
arrival, promising that we'll be surprised by their progress on our=20
behalf," Janeway smiled, for she too was thrilled.  "It also seems=20
you made a fan, Commander," she teased as she handed him a message=20
pad.=20

Everyone continued on with his or her hopes and thoughts of what the=20
Pakor technology would bring, even Tom Chakotay-Paris, while the=20
Commander opened the private letter addressed to him. He read=20
silently, losing track of the conversation around him, then slowly=20
closed it and looked around. Then he met the Captain's eyes, "could=20
you excuse me a minute," he asked in a hushed voice, giving her=20
the `I gotta go' look, and received the smirk that he could leave.=20

He exited quickly and quietly to the ready room rest room and closed=20
and locked the door. Then he reopened the pad and reread the message,=20
this time his face lighting up like a Christmas tree. Then he turned=20
and looked into the mirror, as if seeing himself for the first time=20
in a long while, and caressed his face, and smiled shyly.  His eyes=20
danced with joy, "Soon," he whispered to his reflection, "very soon."=20

THE END

To be continued with "The Pakor" with the next adventures of the=20
Healer Triad!


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************
Part Nine
************
See Part One for disclaimer

Tamara leaned on Chakotay as they walked slowly to their quarters.=20
They could have done a site to site transport, but Tamara was still=20
leery of transporters even after all this time on board Voyager,=20
besides she really wanted to stretch her legs. Chakotay had wanted to=20
carry her, but she wouldn't let him, insisting that she'd only lean=20
on him; she knew that if she gave in the big guy would never give her=20
an inch of breathing room.=20

People greeted her warmly as she made her way home. Tamara smiled at=20
the warmth she felt and the acceptance as she entered their quarters=20
using more of Chakotay's power than she would have been willing to=20
admit. She collapsed on the couch, her breath raspy and her face=20
flushed.
=20
"You still need a Doctor, Tam." Exclaimed Chakotay taking a good look=20
at her, as his concern turned to anger at how the doctor could be so=20
incompetent to let her leave sickbay so soon. "I'll get him to come=20
here!"

"Don't you dare, Chakotay." snapped Tamara. "I don't need the damn=20
Doctor to make me feel better, I need my babies."

"Quiet, both of you." B'Elanna Torres said gently as she came out of=20
the nursery. "I just got them to sleep."

Tamara made to get up from the couch but her strength was gone and=20
Chakotay was able to get her back down with one hand. "Stay put, and=20
take a nap," he ordered.

"All right," Tamara yawned and gave in without a fight. Yawning=20
again, she curled up on the couch and fell right to sleep. Chakotay=20
pulled a light afghan over her then turned and gave a tired smile at=20
B'Elanna.=20

B'Elanna looked at him curiously, "What was that all about?"

"She gets irritable and upset when she's feeling weak or ill. I think=20
it's a defensive reflex," he explained. "People on Rashela are=20
scorned for showing weakness."

"Tamara reminds me of Tom when she gets so defensive like that."=20
B'Elanna remarked, and then gave her dearest friend a supportive hug=20
just before she left the First Officer's quarters.

************
Charlin and Kolotay Chakotay became the center of attention on=20
Voyager. Chakotay and Tamara spent the first week alone with the=20
children bonding, resting and getting used to being a family. They=20
made sure to include Cat in just about all the activities except the=20
breast-feeding and diaper changing.=20

After the first week a very reluctant Chakotay went back to work for=20
the ship needed her First Officer and so he went, but he made sure to=20
adapt his schedule to include his new family. This left Mom at home,=20
so Tamara made sure that word got out that anyone who wanted too have=20
a chance to fuss over the twins by taking them either to the=20
Observation Lounge next to the mess hall for an hour after lunch and=20
dinner should let her know. Captain Janeway was first in line to take=20
the twins and give mom a well deserved break.

But once the family was all together again at home, especially when=20
it came to the babies, the big strong Commander was reduced to a pile=20
of mush, oohing, kooing, and simply smothering his children with=20
affection, including Cat; who was his eldest as far as he was now=20
concerned. Charlin and Ko had the foreboding First Officer wrapped=20
around their little fingers very tightly and Cat was not far behind=20
getting either.=20

When he was home, they became the center of his existence from=20
feeding, bathing, dressing or changing diapers, he was right in the=20
middle of it, with Cat as his number one helper.  This left Tamara=20
free to take naps so she could catch up on her sleep and not feel the=20
slightest bit guilty of leaving the children with their father; glad=20
to see that Cat was fitting into that category as well.=20

Things were starting to settle, but there was definitely a change in=20
the formally stoic First Officer, even Tuvok had noticed how much=20
more relaxed and easy going the Commander was since his return and=20
the birth of his children. Chakotay even started joking and bantering=20
with Tom Paris as if the past never occurred and the two started on a=20
fast track to being friends. The result was that Chakotay started to=20
join Tom, Harry and B'Elanna for lunch a few times a week. Then it=20
developed into a night out with the boys at Sardines, where in a huge=20
surprise Chakotay showed Tom that competition was alive and well on=20
board Voyager when it came to pool.=20

Indeed, life was settling down into a good rhythm for everyone as the=20
tiny starship continued its journey home.=20

***********
When the twins were six weeks old, Tamara went back to work in=20
Sickbay doing half-shifts in the morning. A corner of Sickbay was=20
turned into a nursery for the babies since they were being breast-fed=20
and still required to be near by mommy. Andy, Voyagers new mascot,=20
would come along to keep an eye on the babies when Mama was busy with=20
her duties, not that it was needed, but it made Tamara feel better=20
knowing he was there.=20

It was not hard to find sitters in the afternoon so Tamara could get=20
a break to spend time on the holodeck or continue her medical=20
studies; in fact the real challenge was developing a rotating=20
schedule so everyone that wanted a chance got a turn in order to=20
avoid hurt feeling. It never occurred to her till she saw it first=20
hand at just how much the crew could be worse than babies if they got=20
skipped or someone got more time than someone else. But between=20
Chakotay and her, a fair and rotating schedule was made, along with a=20
bi t of a reminder that they were Starfleet officers.=20

Tom had even suggested that  Tamara charge the crew for the privilege=20
of watching the little tykes, and was seriously considering it; till=20
she made the mistake of telling her upstanding and forthwith mate,=20
who squashed the idea all together.=20

Voyager then entered a quiet part of the Delta Quadrant and the twins=20
provided the best amusement for the crew at the resort. The list for=20
baby-sitters grew to include almost the entire ship. The top three=20
favorites were Tuvok, Tom and B'Elanna and Miguel Ayala from=20
Security. Even Seven took a turn with Harry Kim helping her baby-sit=20
for an evening and get a up-close perspective of parenthood.

//Pity,// Tamara had thought, when she looked at the huge list of=20
offers and recalled how they could have made a killing if they had=20
charged the crew; it would have more than covered the cost that she=20
and Chakotay had put aside for the wedding. She still recalled how=20
out of nowhere Chakotay walked into the living room, where she sat=20
resting, staring at the stars, and simply knelt before her as he took=20
her hand. He gave it a simple but loving kiss, and told her that he=20
would always care for Kathryn, but he loved her, and wanted her to be=20
his wife; if she would have him after waiting so long to ask her.=20

Tamara was a good person, but she made Chakotay sweat=85for about ten=20
minutes, for she couldn't stand it anymore and said yes. A week later=20
the two were married after a very simple ceremony, and Cat had a=20
Father who she adored and adored her, and she had a husband=85they=20
really were a family now.=20

***********
When the twins were four months old, Tamara and Miguel Ayala went on=20
a trading run to a nearby system while the ship stopped to=20
investigate an intriguing anomaly. Chakotay was far from happy about=20
Tamara going on this mission much less taking the twins, but she was=20
still breast-feeding them and Voyager needed the supplies and it was=20
a fact, she was the best `horse trader' on board; and from what=20
Neelix had informed everyone before Seven and Ensign Culhaine and=20
himself were sent out in the Delta Flyer for a food-gathering mission=20
to a nearby Class-M planet, that the Frellions respected a good=20
haggler. It became a matter of need verses personal desire, and even=20
the Commander knew what was best and quietly gave his wife his=20
blessings.=20

Noting the scowl on the Commander's face the next morning, Tom spent=20
the day teasing his favorite First Officer trying to keep things=20
light, but to the dismay of the pilot, Chakotay did not rise to the=20
bait no matter how far Tom sank in his attempts to raise the=20
Commander's spirits. The Commander only blushed at the raunchy jokes=20
and kept his silence as it was clear the he keenly felt the absence=20
of his family to the point where he decided to work late in his=20
office after his shift in order to keep busy or he'd worry himself=20
into an early grave. He made arrangements for Cat to stay with Naomi=20
while Mom was gone for he knew he would be no good to his oldest=20
girl, since he was barely holding together as it was.

When Tom got off shift that evening, he noted that Chakotay was still=20
in his office buried in his work. Since B'Elanna was working late in=20
engineering, Tom decided to bring the First Officer some dinner and=20
perhaps a second chance at easing the stress he knew the older man=20
was feeling with his wife and two youngest children gone from the=20
ship.  Knowing that Chakotay was a vegetarian; he got some soup,=20
fruit and rolls from the mess hall on a covered tray and brought it=20
to the office.  Feeling a bit shy all of a sudden, his hand shook as=20
he touched the door pad to announce his presence. //Geesh,// he=20
scolded himself wondering what that was all about, but before any=20
thoughts would develop in his head he heard the Commander's voice.=20

"Enter." Chakotay's voice sounded neutral.

"Hi, Commander. I thought you might be hungry so I brought you a tray=20
from the mess hall." Tom said cheerfully as he entered the office and=20
set the tray down on the desk in front of the Commander.

"Thank you, Tom. I appreciate it." Chakotay grinned at him for a=20
quick moment. Pushing the PADD's off to one side; he picked at the=20
food but didn't have much of an appetite.=20
"Miss the family?" Tom asked as he sat on the chair in front of the=20
desk and crossing his arms to hide his sudden nervousness.

"Yes, I do. I never fully appreciated my family until last night.=20
Even as I cuddled Cat in my arms the place still felt=85empty,"=20
Chakotay said, as he still felt the emptiness that he knew only his=20
wife could fill.=20

"Would you care for a game of pool at Sandrine's later this evening?=20
I promise not to take too many of your rations from you. And it'll=20
help keep your mind off of unnecessary worrying." Tom smiled warmly,=20
his blue eyes sparkling.=20

 Chakotay suddenly found himself wondering what it would be like to=20
kiss those perfect firm lips. "What time?" He mentally shook himself=20
free of the notion, but still wanting some kind of company so he=20
wouldn't brood in his quarters all night he would go with Tom and=20
play a nice=85safe=85game of pool.

"Say 2000 hours, Chakotay." Tom saw the flash of lust in those warm=20
brown eyes for just a split second and blushed. He thought of=20
B'Elanna and felt ashamed for at the same split second he had felt=20
the heat of lust in his own body for the older man. He shook off the=20
notion, for tonight was for his `friend' who was in need of=20
a `friend' nothing else.

"All right, I'll see you than." Chakotay suddenly found himself with=20
an appetite after all and started to eat his dinner as Tom left the=20
office.

**********
At 2000 hours Chakotay entered Sandrine's on Holodeck 2 wearing black=20
pants and a tan sweater. Tom was already there beating the pants off=20
of Harry at the pool table. Chakotay got a beer from the bar and sat=20
down at a table near the two pool players to watch and wait his turn.=20
He found himself admiring the perfect ass of Tom Paris as he bent=20
over the pool table to take a shot. Taking a big gulp of his drink,=20
he felt a stirring in his loins and managed to spill his drink down=20
into his lap in his surprise at the rush of lust he was feeling for=20
the young blond.=20

Sandrine came over with a bar towel and helped him wipe up the mess=20
while Tom and Harry looked on in amusement, to Chakotay's=20
embarrassment. Handing the towel back to Sandrine and thanking her,=20
he headed for the exit his intent on just going home and forgetting=20
about the pool game and Tom Paris.

"Leaving so soon, Chakotay?" Tom said in a teasing tone coming up=20
behind the Commander's right shoulder, not seeing how upset the=20
Commander really was about the situation that just occurred.=20

"Yes. Is that a problem for you?" He was starting to get annoyed and=20
his wet pants were cold against his thighs and groin and having Tom=20
so close to him was not helping his cause any.

"Are you coming back to play?" Tom pouted as a joke until he saw the=20
look in Chakotay's dark eyes as the older man turned to look at him.

"What I would like to play, I can't, so drop it, Paris," Chakotay=20
warned in a hushed whisper, his face dark with anger and guilt. The=20
thought of that long lean body wiggling in passion beneath him=20
flashed through his mind once more and his groin was no longer=20
feeling the cold, just the heat building from his desire of the young=20
man before him.

"What would you like to play, Commander?" Tom snapped back in an=20
equally hushed voice, though it suddenly took on a sultry tone.=20
Thoughts of exploring the First Officer's body with his hands and=20
mouth made him aware of the tension filling the room between them,=20
while any thoughts of his B'Elanna were completely gone.

Fortunately, Chakotay's com badge chirped for his attention and he=20
slapped it in irritation. "Chakotay here."

"Commander, you have an incoming communiqu=E9 from the Seymour. Shall I=20
route it to your location?" a voice from the bridge asked.

"Route it to my quarters, please. I'll be there in a few moments.=20
Chakotay out." Without another word, he turned briskly and left the=20
holodeck.

Taking a deep breath, Tom slowly turned and went back to the pool=20
table trying to force his mind back on B'Elanna where it belonged.=20
Harry Kim simply picked up his pool cue and joined Tom in another=20
game and wondered what was going on between the Tom and the=20
Commander, but could see he wasn't going to get any answers tonight,=20
if ever.

**************
Morale rose when Tom Paris and B'Elanna Torres suddenly announced=20
their wedding plans with the permission of the Captain and it was=20
even higher on the actual wedding day.

Chakotay was proud to be giving B'Elanna away at the wedding. She had=20
been the closet thing to a sister for a long time. Plus, Tamara was=20
drooling over him in his dress uniform, giving him something to look=20
forward too after the reception.=20

Tamara caught a mental flash of regret and lost chances between Tom=20
and Chakotay and wondered about it, but love of B'Elanna overrode=20
their thoughts and hearts and so she put it to the back of her mind,=20
not feeling any concern over the sudden realization that something=20
existed between her husband and the soon to be groom. The small=20
wedding was preceded by a huge reception in the mess hall compliments=20
of Neelix and Seven.
She was having too many erotica thoughts to pay too much attention to=20
the ceremony for she was loving the way the black pants outlined that=20
firm round ass of her lover. Arrangements had been made ahead of time=20
for care of the kids for the night and they had the quarters to=20
themselves for the whole night pending a red alert.

The wedding reception was magnificent with the majority of the crew=20
attending. After some great food (not a trace of leola root anywhere)=20
the dancing commenced with Tom and B'Elanna leading off followed by=20
the Captain and Tuvok and Chakotay and Tamara. Soon the dance floor=20
was full while the music played. Seven even got Harry out on the=20
floor, for Harry and Seven had been seen a lot together recently it=20
didn't' surprise anyone.

Chakotay had a dance with B'Elanna, Kathryn and Seven while Tamara=20
had a dance with Tom, Neelix and Harry. The rest of the dancing found=20
Chakotay and Tamara intent on each other with their sensual movements=20
and oblivious to the rest of the ship. People were too caught up in=20
the reception to the raising sexual tension between their First=20
Officer and the Healer, but its passion only added to the=20
undercurrent that was already flowing between several of the couples=20
there that night.

About an hour later, Tamara asked Chakotay to give her ten minutes=20
before meeting her back at home. Reluctantly, he agreed, then joining=20
the Captain to give the newly married couple in a farewell toast as=20
they left in the Delta Flyer for a four-day honeymoon.

When he arrived he found that candles were lighted and place=20
strategically throughout the living room and bedroom giving off a=20
soft glow and ambiance greeting. Tamara was waiting wearing a green=20
silk teddy that matched the green in her eyes and accented the copper=20
red hair. His black pants were suddenly too tight as his cock rose in=20
response to the sensuous woman in front of him.

"Chakotay," she breathed softly. It sent a chill down his spine as=20
her eyes darkened with passion.

Chakotay held still his lust for this woman. She had planned this=20
night and he would let her lead for she rarely took the initiative=20
lately. Her hips swayed seductively as she approached him while her=20
hands slowly caressed her upper body through the silk. A deep growl=20
rumbled in his chest as he saw her nipples got hard and poking the=20
silk in invitation.

`This uniform is defiantly too hot,' he mused as Tamara started to=20
undress him. A wave of pleasure washed over him as she opened up a=20
mind link with him. It had been quite awhile since they had shared=20
love on both physical and mental levels.

He could barely think or breathe by the time she finished undressing=20
him. Standing naked in all his bronze glory before her, he could=20
hardly stay still as her heated gaze traveled from his hair down his=20
body to his toes and back to his face. Her eyes were so dilated they=20
were almost black with just a trace of green when they came to rest=20
on his cock standing at attention.

"Would you like some help with that?" she asked licking her lips.

"What can you do to help it?" he teased her by stroking his cock.

"Treat it like an all day sucker," she took his other hand and led=20
him into the bedroom. Having him lay down Tamara knelt between his=20
legs and sucked on his cock until he came with a roar. She swallowed=20
most of it and wiped him clean with a soft towel she had placed by=20
the bed earlier, while her love laid there trying to regain his=20
composure.=20

"Come up here, baby," he pulled his wife into his arms and kissed her=20
deeply tasting his fluids mixed with hers making for a delicious=20
taste.

Resting for a few minutes, she made no protest when she ended up on=20
her back with Chakotay kissing her hard and his hands kneading her=20
breasts. He left a trail of hot wet kisses down her neck while=20
rubbing his newly erected cock against her public mound. She lifted=20
her legs and wrapped them around his waist while rubbing herself=20
shamelessly against his hard body enjoying the growling rumbling in=20
his chest.

A com badge chirped and they both groaned.

It was Tamara's and she smacked it in annoyance. "What!" she=20
exclaimed rudely and making her annoyance known. For at that moment,=20
she didn't care if it Captain Janeway.

"This is the Doctor. I urgently need your assistance in Sickbay,=20
Healer."

"Whatever. I'll be there. Tamara out." Her annoyance was very evident=20
as she got up from the bed and a dark look of trouble crossed her=20
face, for she suddenly had a foreboding feeling about things, but it=20
wasn't clear as to what the actual problem was.

Chakotay lay there and grinned at her while she yanked a tunic over=20
her head grumbling to herself. But he suddenly could tell it was more=20
than the fact that sex had been postponed. "What's the matter, Tam?"=20
He propped himself up on one elbow resting his hand against his head,=20
starting to worry.

"Nothing." Her tone was bitter and very cold as she left without=20
looking back leaving a stunned lover behind her, not realizing she=20
should have spoken up when she had the chance.

**********
The heavy metal door clanged as the guard opened it and light entered=20
the stone brick cell illuminating the prisoner within. He was=20
kneeling on a moldy mass of dried grass with his hands chained behind=20
him. Blinking against the light, he tried to make out who was at the=20
door of his cell. A rush of cool air made his sturdy frame shiver=20
with a sudden chill. The command uniform had been reduced to a few=20
rags from the punishment he had suffered at the hands of his captors.

A figure in a dark cloak descended on him and he flinched in sudden=20
concern of the unknown.  Then creamy colored arms encircled his neck=20
pulling his face close to a familiar sight, sound and smell.

"Chakotay," his wife whispered in relief next to his ear.

"Tam," he whispered hoarsely in delight and in sudden fear for her=20
safety. "What are you doing here?"

"Verifying you're alive and safe as part of the bargain before any=20
negotiations for your release begin," Tamara answered as she pulled=20
out a medical tricorder and started to run a scan over him.  She=20
kissed him full on the mouth to keep him from asking anything else.

It didn't work for he was a stubborn man, but she loved him anyway=20
and she was determined to get him out of this place, for she had come=20
to realize he was just as much a part of her as was the children she=20
gave birth too.=20

"How did you talk the Captain into letting you come?" Chakotay asked=20
curious, for knowing Janeway, she would've been here herself, not his=20
wife.

"I made her see reason=85my way." Tamara grinned wickedly pulling a=20
hypo spray out giving him an injection that would assure he would be=20
all right.

"How Tam?" he demanded knowing from the look on her face that she had=20
done something very wrong.

"I knocked her out with a hypo and than used the Seymour to come here=20
and make a deal to get you out," Tamara confessed as she put the=20
equipment away in one of her cloak pockets.

"You didn't?" his look was incredulous.

"I most certainly did! Captain Janeway is not expendable and I am."=20
Tamara kissed him long and hard. "I'll be back for you shortly."

"Tam, get out of here! You are not expendable! You need to think=20
about the children!" Chakotay whispered fiercely behind her. His=20
chains rattled as his rage and fear grew for her safety.

The leader came into the cell and towered over the healer with his=20
dark eyes calm and foreboding. His gray skin mottled seem to blend in=20
with the gray walls like a chameleon. Long black hair was groomed=20
impeccable and flowed down over his jumpsuit. He lowered his rifle=20
and ran a finger through her red hair.

Tamara did not flinch, but locked eyes with the leader and refused to=20
back down. She could feel his interest in her and Chakotay's growing=20
rage.

"Is this a normal color for hair among your species?" The leader=20
asked feeling the silken strands.

"Red is, though not this extreme shade. Would you care for a lock as=20
a keepsake?" Tamara asked casually as she slipped a knife into her=20
hand. Reaching up real quick with both hands, she loped off a thick=20
handful of red hair and offered it to the leader. "I am Healer=20
Tamara. Do you have a name I can use for our dealings for this one's=20
release?"

"Omal of Clan Zier," Omal said taking the red hair and studying it=20
appreciatively. "How important is this male to you?"

"That depends on what you're trying to get from us?" Tamara=20
countered, for she knew she had to keep Chakotay's true value to her=20
and Voyager from her opponent or she would never be able to meet=20
their demands. "Do you mind if I speak to him in `private' for a=20
moment?"

"Be my guest. I will arrange for a meal for us and some=20
entertainment." Omal was gracious. "I thought Captain Janeway was=20
coming."

"This is my male, not hers. I used my persuasion to convince her to=20
let me come, since it will be me that will be put out if he is lost=20
to us, not her," Tamara smirked turning her attention to Chakotay.

Tamara directed her thoughts to the chained man fighting a deep rage.=20
[Will you calm down before you stroke out on me? I could always put=20
you to sleep.]

[Don't you dare!] His mind growled.  It was bad enough him being=20
helpless as it was.

[Now listen,] she did mind to mind once she was sure of the link.=20
[Follow my lead in whatever I throw at you. I will get you out one=20
way or another, Love,]

[Get out. Leave me. The children,] his mind was dwelling on them, for=20
that was where his heart was, there for ignoring her efforts and=20
thoughts.

Anger suddenly welded up in her and she did what she had never done=20
before, she slapped him; hard enough to leave a hand print plus she=20
felt a couple of bones snap in her wrist. "Will you ever have any=20
confidence in my abilities and me? Or yet simple trust?" she shouted.=20
Turning from him in disgust, she held her wrist while healing it as=20
she approached the cell door and left him without looking back.

Chakotay crumpled to the mattress in shame and frustration. To a=20
degree Tamara was right. Ever since she had come with him to Voyager,=20
he had been over protective of her and the children. But didn't she=20
see it wasn't because He had failed to see how she had blossom into=20
the headstrong independent woman; she was like that from the first=20
day they met. Yes, he had kept trying to protect and shelter her from=20
the harsh realities of the known universe, but didn't she understand=20
by now that this was his nature? To protect what he loved with=20
everything he had? It was never a matter of trust on his part, for he=20
trusted her with his heart and soul and had full confidence in her=20
abilities! No wonder, they've had their share of fights. She wanted a=20
partnership with him not a controlling mate as she obviously saw him=20
and he just wanted to make sure she and their children were safe at=20
all cost. With tears running down his face, he steeled himself to=20
accept that it would be her who would be doing the protecting and him=20
the one protected.

****************
Omal and Tamara enjoyed a pleasant meal together after which they=20
retired to the conference room to begin talking. Omal had recognized=20
the famed healer as soon as she had opened the door to her ship and=20
stepped out. Twenty minutes later, they emerged and a guard was=20
waiting for them with Chakotay beside him. A large bruise was forming=20
on his left cheek and eye. He winced as he smiled when she came over=20
to check on him.

"I'm fine," he said leaning into her hand as she caressed his face.

"Let's go home, handsome." Tamara said as the guard removed his=20
chains. "I am so sorry, that I hit you. I don't know what came over=20
me."

"We'll talk about it later. Let's get out of here," he said calmly,=20
trying to show `her' that he really did trust her in this matter.

As the Seymour left the planet, Tamara set course for Voyager and put=20
the ship on autopilot so she could tend to Chakotay. After healing=20
his face and wrists, he pulled her into his arms and went exploring=20
with his lips and tongue. She responded to his advances sensing his=20
love for her.

"Voyager to Seymour." Janeway's voice cut through their arousal.

"Uh oh! I'm in for it now." Tamara said as she detached herself from=20
her lover. She hit the communication console. "Seymour here."

"Did you retrieve him?" Janeway's voice was icy.

"Yes, Captain. The Commander is here with me. The trade was=20
successful. It turned out that they recognized me and so all I had to=20
do was some `doctorin' in exchange for my Husband. We should meet up=20
with Voyager in about an hour. Seymour out." She cut the link.

"Why did you cut her off like that?" Chakotay asked as he pulled off=20
the rags he had been wearing and took her in his arms.

"Because when we get back, I'll be in the brig for who knows how long=20
and I want to take some of your loving with me, baby. Now shut up and=20
put those lips to work." Tamara said as her tunic hit the floor and=20
they tumbled onto the bunk at the back of the ship.

"Yes, ma'am," he replied to her order, for he knew if she did go to=20
the brig, they would have plenty of time to talk about everything=20
that happened. They would find out one way or another soon enough.=20

********
 "I hereby sentence you to ninety days in the brig for assault on my=20
person. Do you have anything to say in your defense, Healer Tamara?"=20
Janeway announced in her ready room where Tamara stood flanked by=20
Chakotay, Tuvok and Ayala.

"No, Captain. I fully accept the responsibilities of my actions and=20
the punishments therein as the result of them." Tamara said firmly=20
and quietly.

"Commander Tuvok, please escort the Healer to the brig," Kathryn=20
asked her Security Chief.

"Yes, Captain," Tuvok gently laid a hand on Tamara's arm. "Healer, if=20
you please."

"Yes, Commander," Tamara said as she let Tuvok and Ayala escort her=20
away and she did not even try to look at Chakotay as she left.

"Captain, I wish to protest this," Chakotay advanced towards her desk.

"Protest noted and logged, Commander. I'm relieving you of duty for=20
the next three days so you can make arrangements for the care of your=20
children," Janeway stated.

"Is Tamara allowed to have visitors, Captain?" His tone was curt with=20
anger.

"Of course, Chakotay. I was not trying to deprive her of her family.=20
But what she did was a serious offense; even you have to admit that.=20
If we were back in the Alpha Quadrant, she would be put in prison for=20
a year, and you know they don't allow minors to visit for the first=20
three months. I had to set an example, and I'd like to think you=20
would do the same if you were in my place. Perhaps after some time,=20
I'll find a way to let her off for good behavior, so put me at the=20
top of the list for babysitting." Her face softened. "Now go take=20
care of my god-children."

"Yes, Ma'am."

Janeway sighed and stared out the view port knowing that had she been=20
in Tamara's shoes, she would've done the same thing, but that still=20
didn't make it right and she meant what she said, she had to set an=20
example; she was only sorry that the situation occurred in the first=20
place to force all this to occur in the first place. //What is done,=20
is done,// she thought to herself, and sat back and got back to work=85
finding a reasonable amount of time before she could release her best=20
friend's wife.=20

**********
Tuvok noticed that Tamara flinched slightly when the containment=20
field snapped into place behind her entering the cell that was to be=20
her home for the next three months. She turned and faced him still in=20
her professional mood of non-emotion.

"Ensign Sanders will be your guard for day shift, Healer. I shall=20
check on you from time to time. Do you have any questions?" Tuvok=20
asked and saw her relax a little.

"Am I allowed to listen to music or have some reading material or=20
should I plan on some serious meditation sessions?" Tamara asked=20
seriously. Now that she was here, she wanted to consider her options=20
on passing the time.

"Yes, you are allowed limited access to the computer. May I make a=20
suggestion?" the Vulcan offered.

"Certainly, Mr. Tuvok," green eyes regarded his dark eyes solemnly.

"I can make certain selections in the library on the Vulcan culture=20
that would help in our upcoming lessons. This seems like a good study=20
time for you." He answered not wanting to lose his student. He=20
enjoyed her different slant on life as she called it.
"Please do and thank you. Would you inform the Doctor I need to see=20
him for an exam. I did something on the planet and I need to know if=20
it was physical or mental reaction. Now, if you will excuse me I see=20
a bed with my name on it and I wish to take a nap." She nodded to=20
Tuvok in a gesture of respect to her teacher and flopped down on the=20
narrow bunk. She curled up facing the wall and fell asleep.

By request, the Doctor came into the brig to make a house call and=20
ran his scanner over Tamara finding nothing physically wrong with her.

"It must be post-traumatic stress, Doctor. I'm decompressing and the=20
rage is coming out at the wrong times," Tamara admitted her common=20
sense and intuition kicking in.

"Maybe you should be the Doctor if you are analyzing yourself and=20
I'll go play golf on the holodeck," the EMH sniffed. "You should have=20
gone to the counseling I suggested months ago. Between being forced=20
into the future, having a child, and other things on the planet your=20
found yourself on; you add to that two more children another culture=20
to adapt to, and last but not least, having your husband kidnapped=20
and held hostage for the last seven days. "

"Okay, who is qualified to be a counselor besides Chakotay, Doctor?"=20
Tamara asked. "I'm not talking to him about this. He's too close to=20
the situation, and besides, if I could talk to him, I wouldn't be in=20
this mess now would I?"

"That would leave Tuvok, the Captain or myself," he replied.

"In that case, I chose Tuvok if he'll accept. We are already working=20
together on a project and I trust his judgment." Tamara mused as she=20
sat down and tried to relax and think about what had set her off down=20
on the planet.=20

************
"Hey there. Are you all right?" the voice of Tom Paris broke through=20
her meditation as she sat with crossed legs on the floor of the cell=20
with her hands folded in her lap. Not even three days in and people=20
were sneaking in to visit her. Tom made the sixth while Tuvok turned=20
a blind eye. It never occurred to her that she had been allowed=20
visitors; she just assumed that since the Captain was so angry to=20
give her three months, she'd make her do hard time.=20

"Hello, Tom. I'm fine=85so far. What brings you here?" she opened her=20
eyes and watched the tall blond with interest.

"I was concerned about you as a friend, especially when I heard what=20
happened. You're lucky to be allowed visitors," his voice trailed off=20
and a red flush spread across his beautiful face in remembrance.=20

"I'm aware of your last visit here, Tom and I agree with the decision=20
you made," she smiled and stood up to stretch her tight leg=20
muscles. "It's not like I haven't been to prison before either."

"You have?" His blue eyes widened in astonishment.

"I spent a few months in prison back on Rashela when I broke=20
Deevick's nose and killed a couple of his guards, in self-defense,"=20
Tamara admitted. "This is heaven compared to that time." Her eyes=20
grew shadowed by a haunted look for a moment and passed.

"Was it bad?" His eyes mirrored her own, haunted by dark memories of=20
a bad time they couldn't forget.

"Yes and I don't want to talk about it." Her defenses snapped into=20
place and Tom recognized them as well. He took a step back and=20
regarded her with a thoughtful look.

"I see the convicts are getting to know each other," Dalby sneered as=20
he came into the brig to relieve the day shift security guard.

"Oh great, Crewman idiot is back. I am so lucky to be blessed with=20
your fucking presence once again," Tamara snarled and turned her back=20
on both of them. After sitting back on the floor, she crossed her=20
legs and attempted to meditate once again facing the wall.

"Shut your face, Dalby." Tom snapped at the former Maquis. There was=20
a history of bad blood between the two.

"Is there something going on I should know about, Tom?" Commander=20
Chakotay asked as he entered the brig and noticed the tension in the=20
air and feeling his protective nature kick in, not only for his wife,=20
but for Tom.

"Nothing, sir. I just stopped by to say hello to Tamara. I'll be=20
going," Tom choked back his anger.

"Thank you for coming, Tom." Tamara said softly from behind the=20
containment field.

"You're welcome, Tamara."  Tom left the brig area.

"Take a break, Dalby. Say about thirty minutes." Chakotay suggested=20
to the crewman.

"Yes, sir." Dalby quickly left the area.

Chakotay dropped the containment field and stepped into the cell as=20
she turned around to face the man in her life. Tears formed in her=20
eyes as she stood there.

"Hey, are you all right?" Now he was worried.

"I'm sorry I hit you down on the planet. I've talked to the Doctor=20
and he's arranging for me to talk to Tuvok as my counselor if he will=20
agree to it." Tamara slipped into his outstretched arms wanting to=20
feel loved and secure. "It's just=85I think its all just starting to=20
get to me=85you know?" she cried.=20

"It's all right, Tam. The Doctor came by my office and we had a talk.=20
I understand how much your going through and there's nothing to be=20
sorry for." He hugged her gently and sat down with her on the narrow=20
bunk and let her cry. "I love you, baby, which is the reason I'm such=20
a jerk when it comes to being over protective of you. I know how much=20
you've taken on=85I just don't want anymore to be added=85you know? But I=20
think with some time, and a bit more communication, I'll stop keeping=20
the world from your doorstep and you'll see I do trust you love and=20
your abilities; after all I trust you with my heart and soul don't I?"

"I love you so much, `Tay," she whispered feeling better than she had=20
in a long time and really felt that everything was going to work out,=20
regardless of the dark visions she was having of things to come.

************
End of Part Nine
************


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